Chapter 6 (original) (raw)

Title: Of Late Bloomers and Early Risers
Author: lcuddywannabe
Genre: Drama/Romance/Humour
Characters/Pairing: Howard/OC, Howard/Vince Friendship
Rating: T
Warning: There is some cursing. Also, Vince is kind of a tit in the beginning.
Disclaimer: I'm not affiliated with the Boosh... yet. I did send Julian a birthday card. Who knows.
Author's Comments: I originally wrote this because I was getting annoyed with all the Vince het fiction and how Howard kept getting the short end. So I'm giving Howard the long end this time. Take that any way you please.

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5

Howard didn’t think he’d ever been this angry at Vince before. In the past, when Vince had done something to hurt Howard, he’d just chalked it up to Vince’s childlike nature and tried to take it in stride. This, however, was the final straw.

“What did you say to her, Vince?” Howard was yelling at Vince from outside of his bedroom door; Vince had gone and shut himself in when Howard had turned on him after Lilly had made some sort of lame excuse and left.

“I didn’t do anything!” Vince was trying to go about as usual, but the way Howard was acting over Lilly was starting to freak him out. He worried about Howard, even though sometimes it didn’t seem like it.

“Well you must have said something! I wasn’t the one who spent all day with her! Can’t you come out of there and act like a mature adult for once in your life?!” Howard had known Vince long enough to know which buttons to press to get a reaction.

Vince yelled through the door again, “I’m not immature! I’m youthful!”

“That’s just another word for immature!” Howard was so frustrated he kicked the doorjamb, stubbing his toe and not at all helping to calm him down.

He went over to the couch and sat down, willing himself to breathe. He was a man of action; he needed to think this through. Yelling at Vince wasn’t going to get him the girl, was it?

Twenty minutes passed and there had been no noise from Vince’s room, nor had Howard budged from the couch. Howard had realized something, though. He wasn’t going to be able to do any of this alone. He needed Vince’s help and he needed Vince to be on his side. They couldn’t compete with each other anymore.

Vince might have had other ideas though. True, he couldn’t bother with Lilly anymore. Clearly, it was causing a rift in his relationship with Howard, but his feelings were hurt now and he’d be damned if he was going to help his friend anymore.

There was a knock on Vince’s door, “Vince, come out. We need to talk.”

Vince rolled his eyes. Howard could be such a drama queen sometimes. He got up and opened the door anyway and – after seeing the look on Howard’s face – found it hard to muster any more animosity towards his best mate.

“I’m sorry I yelled at you, Little Man. You’re right; I have been a bit off lately.” The use of his nickname plus his admission had completely erased any bitterness that Vince still felt. He could never stay mad at Howard for long.

Vince shrugged it off and pushed his way into the living room, “I may have been a bit harsh about the Lilly situation.” He turned to Howard and saw his friend’s face cloud over again, “I’m not interested in her, Howard!”

The dark look that had fallen over Howard’s face changed to complete confusion in less than a second, “Then why…” He couldn’t even phrase a coherent question.

Vince shrugged again, “All in good fun.”

Howard stammered about for a moment, trying to figure out what was going on, “You were…”

Vince grinned and nodded, “Just messing about! If you like her that much, by all means…” He gestured to Howard and suddenly, Howard understood. Vince had been playing a game the whole time.

“How can you be so callous?! Do you care about anyone but yourself, Vince?” Howard was back to yelling again. Maybe that was the only way he could get through to Vince.

“What? Of course I do! Look, Howard, I was just having a laugh. It’s over, I’m done!” He held up his hands in submission, “Why are you so angry?”

Howard sighed and lowered his tone, hoping this really was the end of it, “Because, Vince, you can’t do that to people. Especially people you care about. You’re my friend, I wouldn’t flirt with a girl you liked just to spite you.”

Vince laughed, “You couldn’t! That’s my point, Howard. I can have any girl I want, even the boring ones that you like. I don’t understand it, but she doesn’t seem to be interested in me. Do you know what we talked about while I was showing her about?” He paused, letting Howard grind his teeth a couple more times before finishing, “We talked about you! She wouldn’t stop asking about you! She wasn’t even interested in my Brian Ferry stories!”

Everything Howard had planned to say as a rebuttal to what he thought was going to be another harsh remark from Vince fell away. The best he could do was open and close his mouth like a dying fish. He felt a bit like a dying fish – completely out of his element.

Vince could tell that Howard was having some sort of meltdown. He probably would be having one too if he were Howard. This was the first time someone had been interested in him and not the other way round. He decided that the best course of action would be to sit Howard down on the sofa and try to give him some advice.

“Come on, you crazy muffin. Sit down.” He guided him over to the sofa and pushed him down, Howard didn’t even bother to resist. Howard met his eyes and the look he was giving Vince shocked him. Howard was horrified.

“It’s going to be okay. You’ve got me, remember?” Vince grinned and patted Howard’s knee.

The action brought Howard out of his daze for a moment, “Don’t tou – oh, what’s the use?” He looked at Vince and made a strangled noise, “What do I do now? She’s gone.”

Vince removed his hand – not wanting to push the limits too far – and laughed, “She isn’t gone forever! Look, Howard, here’s what you have to do…”

Vince was sure he could make something of the situation and playing matchmaker was in his blood, after all.

X-posted to shaman_council because I'm a cross-posting whore.