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Hey everyone...
Here is something that I find very helpful.
From Moods magazine, Spring 2004.
BPD, Try to Imagine…
By Nicola Whipp, B.A.
Try to imagine the one thing in your life that gives you the most pleasure. Picture it. Now try to imagine that one thing no longer mattering to you. No matter how hard you try nothing gives you pleasure. That’s depression. Now try to imagine what you need to do on a typical day. Do you go to work? Look after your family? How about doing the dishes? Now imagine that you can’t do any of those things and simply getting out of bed, not just in the morning, but at all, seems impossible. That’s severe depression. Now imagine a self-hatred or internal rage as intense or as deep and immobilizing as that sadness. Imagine an emotional sensitivity and fear of loneliness so overwhelming, your mind makes you feel numb as a form of protection. Think of all the people you love and have loved and, no matter how hard you try, you end up hurting them over and over again. Imagine needing help from others but the very things you need help with pushes people away. Now imagine the pain of having all these feelings mixed together, like a tornado of emotions, over and over again. A pain so great it brings you to a point of having to escape. A pain so great you consider hurting yourself. The unthinkable becomes thinkable. A pain caused by symptoms of an illness you never asked for or deserve. Now try to imagine living in the midst of all this emotional chaos and depression and trying to maintain some level of “normal” existence. Still trying to succeed, to love and be loved, trying to regroup and keep on trying after every relapse and starting over again and again. Having the intelligence and ability to succeed but always being interrupted by an unpredictable and ruthless illness. An illness people blame you for. An illness people forget or don’t realize is exactly that, a physical illness and not an individual’s shortcoming. Imagine all of this. That’s Borderline Personality Disorder.
Nicola Whipp has a confirmed diagnosis of both Bipolar II Disorder and BPD. She is a domestic violence survivor, a single mother with a happy, healthy son. This amazing woman graduated from Wilfred Laurier University with a B.A. in Sociology and she is currently working on her B.S.W. (social work) at McMaster University as well as her Psychosocial Rehabilitation Professional Certificate at Mohawk College.
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