____question's Journal (original) (raw)

I have a question, as I think is the theme for this nifty little community.

I met someone a while back, and we fell instantly in love.
Problem; she had a boyfriend.
Because she was 'the one' we began seeing each other anyway.
After a while, I realized what I was doing and stopped. We tried being friends, but it just didn't work. I told her we needed to stop talking.

My question is; it's been two monthes, and I still miss her.
Should I contact her, or let things be?
She still has a boyfriend, and thus our 'relationship' still cannot flourish in that aspect.
Honestly..Although I still feel for her that way, I do not want that kind of relationship with her.
Im afraid I will fall again, and it will all start over again, and I will be crushed again.

But then again..
Ever since I stopped talking to her..No, when I felt us falling apart, about 2 weeks before we 'broke up,' I have felt empty inside.
My loneliness has never been this bad, nor for this long. But finally, I have made peace with myself, and I know I am healing, realizing my feelings for others, and becoming alright with myself. The loneliness isnt that bad anymore, but my worries haven't ceased.
I dont want to need her again.

So, once more.

Do I go back, or stay where I am?