ask! (original) (raw)

I'm 23 and I have a brother that's 17.
(We both live with my dad, my parents are divorced, the reason i still live with him is because I'm going to college and don't make enough money to pay for that and rent and so on)

When I was in high school I knew people that did drugs and I had been around them when they did it but I never did it. (I'm straight edge). Last month my dad was out of town and my brother had a party.
He text me saying 'if i have a party will you tell mom or dad?'
I thought party=5 or 6 friends over and playing video games all night.
Come to find out it was over 20 people getting drunk and high.
I didn't want to be around it so I ended up staying the night at a friends house.

This wasn't the first and only time. I heard from someone else (someone I work with) that my brother has gotten drunk before. I just recently over heard a conversation my brother was having with his friends about last night.
They went to a park at 3 am to smoke and drink, the cops came asked to see their IDs and just told them 'the park closes at 10' and let them go. I also over heard that my brother was driving while drunk/high and almost crashed/hit curbs a few times.
I had also over heard a convo about the party and how a cop showed up but once again did nothing.

The other night he came home at 2 am and asked if I would buy him some beer and I said no.
I'm concerned. I want to tell my parents (most likely I would tell my mom if anything). The things that bug me are I'm afraid that my dad is going to eventually find out and blame me and think that I'm the one buying the beers because I'm over 21. Also the fact that he is driving while drunk/on drugs I'm afraid that hes going to get in an accident and I'm going to feel guilty because I know hes doing these things and I'm not trying to stop him.

The other things that bug me are the fact that the cops have caught them many times and have not done anything about it, yet when I was his age I would get in trouble with the cops for things like putting dish soap in fountains. Personally I find drink/high driving to be a lot more worse than bubbles in fountains.

I want to tell but I'm afraid, what should I do?
Plus the other thing is hes under 18 and I always thought (when i was growing up i was told) there is a curfew that says if your under 18 you have to be indoors by 10pm you can't be out and about with out a parent. Also the fact that its like my parents were more over protective of me when I was his age and they don't really care what my bro does. I was never allowed to be out and about on a school night and if I went to a friends house my parents had to know who's house what we are doing and so on. But with him hes allowed to just up and go.

Should I tell? I told myself (after the party incident) that I would give him 3 strikes and if I heard any more about drinking/drugs I'd tell, which means that he has one strike left.
If I do tell what should I say? Should I just hint towards it (thats what i usually do when i tell my parents things)