Poetry Pill (original) (raw)

broken	[04 Apr 2012\|01:38pm]
[ mood \| aggravated ] the sky is fallingi am running.always away never towards.pieces pelt mecrackbrokenirreprarable.
Don't Forget Me

fantasies	[30 Mar 2012\|10:16am]
[ mood \| depressed ] Its math class, trigonometry.the teacher drones on about logs and multiplicationbut i am not paying attention.my mind has been consumed by death.beautiful death that i so desireit feels like i am on fire.my arms burn, craving the metal to be dragged across themdrawing blood,beautiful crimson blood thatdrips drips dripsonto bathroom tiles.its been a whilesince i have enduldged in such activitiesi think i deserve a trip to the crimson riverit gives me shiverswhen the crimson river flows.its math class, trigonometryAnd the teacher drones on about logs and multiplicationbut all i want to do is die.
Don't Forget Me

fantasies

[30 Mar 2012|10:16am]

[ **mood** |

depressed ] Its math class, trigonometry.the teacher drones on about logs and multiplicationbut i am not paying attention.my mind has been consumed by death.beautiful death that i so desireit feels like i am on fire.my arms burn, craving the metal to be dragged across themdrawing blood,beautiful crimson blood thatdrips drips dripsonto bathroom tiles.its been a whilesince i have enduldged in such activitiesi think i deserve a trip to the crimson riverit gives me shiverswhen the crimson river flows.its math class, trigonometryAnd the teacher drones on about logs and multiplicationbut all i want to do is die.

Don't Forget Me

I Am Alice	[27 Mar 2012\|02:16pm]
When the lovely flowers Begin to singWhen the flies Become beautiful I will wait for you at waters edgeNear the Hatter’s graveAnd the Caterpillar’s corpseI loose my self In mirrorsShining silver and goldSmooth and rippled They contradict But they only speak the truthI will search between Here and There, Looking for what I’ve lostI do not know what it isBut I know I must find it Perhaps its buried beneath the Vorpal Sword’s Hidden palace I saw the three of heartsRunning towards meHolding bloody and snow white RosesThe Red Queen criedAt the loss of the King of HeartsAnd stood by his deathbed Wishing for a heart of ice
Don't Forget Me

I Am Alice

[27 Mar 2012|02:16pm]

When the lovely flowers Begin to singWhen the flies Become beautiful I will wait for you at waters edgeNear the Hatter’s graveAnd the Caterpillar’s corpseI loose my self In mirrorsShining silver and goldSmooth and rippled They contradict But they only speak the truthI will search between Here and There, Looking for what I’ve lostI do not know what it isBut I know I must find it Perhaps its buried beneath the Vorpal Sword’s Hidden palace I saw the three of heartsRunning towards meHolding bloody and snow white RosesThe Red Queen criedAt the loss of the King of HeartsAnd stood by his deathbed Wishing for a heart of ice

Don't Forget Me

I Am	[01 Mar 2012\|07:41pm]
I am transientMy darling Paper TownI am but a wisp of cloudBlown about by angerily whispering windsSomething seeming virginalFor when I am touched,I disappearI am the scent of roses and bloodA scent of betrayal of trustThe smell which keeps you awakeSwooning with feverish nightmares and flashes of redI alone allow you to sleepI am the taste of strawberry wine,Which stained the lips of the woman you lovedThe night you first metI am the hunger, devouring your mindSeeking the answers, killing your soulI crave naught but the truth, though you won’t enjoy itI eat away at the most delicate pieces of your psycheI alone will allow you to restI am the god that played on your fears,Wasted you away,Killed your children,Starved your wives,Sent your sons to war
Don't Forget Me

I Am

[01 Mar 2012|07:41pm]

I am transientMy darling Paper TownI am but a wisp of cloudBlown about by angerily whispering windsSomething seeming virginalFor when I am touched,I disappearI am the scent of roses and bloodA scent of betrayal of trustThe smell which keeps you awakeSwooning with feverish nightmares and flashes of redI alone allow you to sleepI am the taste of strawberry wine,Which stained the lips of the woman you lovedThe night you first metI am the hunger, devouring your mindSeeking the answers, killing your soulI crave naught but the truth, though you won’t enjoy itI eat away at the most delicate pieces of your psycheI alone will allow you to restI am the god that played on your fears,Wasted you away,Killed your children,Starved your wives,Sent your sons to war

Don't Forget Me

Think of me	[12 Aug 2010\|01:38pm]
When your left standing all alone in a world so cold and cruel. When you hear the serenade of a string quartet. When you hear the lullaby of true hearts. Will you think of me? When I'm down on my knees and you can't see me, will you think of me? When your left standing alone in this cruel world come find me, come into my arms, into my heart when you've hurt your last, come find me. When your scared when your down and out, when you've strung yourself out from rolling too hard. When your standing all alone in a party, at a rave, in your classroom, at your job, in this cruel world, come find me, and I'll hold your hand. When you've been told that your lifestyle is wrong won't you think of me? How i treated you way too fairly. And now are you left standing? Isn't this life just like a cold dream? Can you still see me? Am I more to you than just a dream? You are all I have thought of all that I have pondered in the ramblings of this pretty mouth. When the loss is like a sea of despair, when the pain is like a gaping wound of what should've been But can this broken heart trully follow the stars? Your all this broken heart has wanted and yet you reject me like a passing thought. Think of me, think of the dreams that we have shared. For once I'm begging you on my knees. Let us relive the start, the times we swore we'd never part, your all I had wanted, all I wanted, all I dreamed of, all I felt so strongly in the dreams of the night. But it, but I wasn't enough, and I watched you depart. Leaving this heart saying "Please no more," Will you remember the times I held you in my arms and told you of my premonition that our passion would soon end, and that soon youd be just a memory as I paced the shower and cried. I fell asleep in your arms after we made love, now I'm asleep on my couch singing "All I wanted was you." Are you too far out there for me to find? Has life ever treated any soul fairly? Has reality? Now I'm the one thats out there being thrown to my knees. Its a crying shame that our passion is now a string symphony. A shame that our souls only united in one last time in a picture. And now Im so deep I think of my actions of every harsh word shpoken, I realize now that live giveth and taketh away so why tempt fate to take away with hate and judgemental words. If I could relive all of my starts would I remember to slow down and feel your heart? Your all I had ever wanted. When I had held your hand I had felt the hope of eternity. Shall we meet there after the pain love? Meet me there. But eternity isn't promised, happiness is not promised only the frivoulous pursuit but in the end we all die alone. Yes we all die alone. And my mind does amazing things and yet cannot muster the ability to show you my heart, to make certain you don't depart. So I'll pace my apartment a few times with my mind stuck in a cell of limited words and actions. And limited ability to make this work. But just like the struggling day moth tapping reapeatedly at your windowsill, to be free and happy, don't help my burdened soul save me now and give me a harshe start and bitter ending and when my wings stop fluttering and my eyes rest on the stars then stop and think that all my heart all my dying heart sings is "All I wanted was you."
Don't Forget Me

Think of me

[12 Aug 2010|01:38pm]

When your left standing all alone in a world so cold and cruel. When you hear the serenade of a string quartet. When you hear the lullaby of true hearts. Will you think of me? When I'm down on my knees and you can't see me, will you think of me? When your left standing alone in this cruel world come find me, come into my arms, into my heart when you've hurt your last, come find me. When your scared when your down and out, when you've strung yourself out from rolling too hard. When your standing all alone in a party, at a rave, in your classroom, at your job, in this cruel world, come find me, and I'll hold your hand. When you've been told that your lifestyle is wrong won't you think of me? How i treated you way too fairly. And now are you left standing? Isn't this life just like a cold dream? Can you still see me? Am I more to you than just a dream? You are all I have thought of all that I have pondered in the ramblings of this pretty mouth. When the loss is like a sea of despair, when the pain is like a gaping wound of what should've been But can this broken heart trully follow the stars? Your all this broken heart has wanted and yet you reject me like a passing thought. Think of me, think of the dreams that we have shared. For once I'm begging you on my knees. Let us relive the start, the times we swore we'd never part, your all I had wanted, all I wanted, all I dreamed of, all I felt so strongly in the dreams of the night. But it, but I wasn't enough, and I watched you depart. Leaving this heart saying "Please no more," Will you remember the times I held you in my arms and told you of my premonition that our passion would soon end, and that soon youd be just a memory as I paced the shower and cried. I fell asleep in your arms after we made love, now I'm asleep on my couch singing "All I wanted was you." Are you too far out there for me to find? Has life ever treated any soul fairly? Has reality? Now I'm the one thats out there being thrown to my knees. Its a crying shame that our passion is now a string symphony. A shame that our souls only united in one last time in a picture. And now Im so deep I think of my actions of every harsh word shpoken, I realize now that live giveth and taketh away so why tempt fate to take away with hate and judgemental words. If I could relive all of my starts would I remember to slow down and feel your heart? Your all I had ever wanted. When I had held your hand I had felt the hope of eternity. Shall we meet there after the pain love? Meet me there. But eternity isn't promised, happiness is not promised only the frivoulous pursuit but in the end we all die alone. Yes we all die alone. And my mind does amazing things and yet cannot muster the ability to show you my heart, to make certain you don't depart. So I'll pace my apartment a few times with my mind stuck in a cell of limited words and actions. And limited ability to make this work. But just like the struggling day moth tapping reapeatedly at your windowsill, to be free and happy, don't help my burdened soul save me now and give me a harshe start and bitter ending and when my wings stop fluttering and my eyes rest on the stars then stop and think that all my heart all my dying heart sings is "All I wanted was you."

Don't Forget Me

	[16 Aug 2005\|10:35am]
Metallic Tastes of LoveWe laid vertically,across the horizontal bed.I stayed up half the night with you,reading Dickinson, Plath, and Sexton.Reading religiously,waiting to lend our lives.I remember the way you smiled,and how warm it felt into my soul.I can still feel your kisses,and your laugh,resounding in my mind.I miss you.Together, we decided.Nothing is really worth this.Together, we bought it,and I laid up back in my bed.Opening our Bibles again,we read and analyzed until exhaustion set in.I placed the drink on my tongue,and felt the metallic taste, like blood,rise again and again my mouth.I kissed you a million times, each time spilling the metallic warmth into you.Repetitively, kissing and drinking, unto you fell asleep.Alas, I slept too,and woke to neon hues of life.What? The metallic taste still burns on my tongue.And as I hold your milky hand tonight for the last time,I can’t fathom why this worked for youand not me?
Don't Forget Me

[16 Aug 2005|10:35am]

Metallic Tastes of LoveWe laid vertically,across the horizontal bed.I stayed up half the night with you,reading Dickinson, Plath, and Sexton.Reading religiously,waiting to lend our lives.I remember the way you smiled,and how warm it felt into my soul.I can still feel your kisses,and your laugh,resounding in my mind.I miss you.Together, we decided.Nothing is really worth this.Together, we bought it,and I laid up back in my bed.Opening our Bibles again,we read and analyzed until exhaustion set in.I placed the drink on my tongue,and felt the metallic taste, like blood,rise again and again my mouth.I kissed you a million times, each time spilling the metallic warmth into you.Repetitively, kissing and drinking, unto you fell asleep.Alas, I slept too,and woke to neon hues of life.What? The metallic taste still burns on my tongue.And as I hold your milky hand tonight for the last time,I can’t fathom why this worked for youand not me?

Don't Forget Me

True Religion	[13 Apr 2005\|05:05pm]
"My religion is not Buddhism;my religion is loving-kindness."H.H., the Dalai LamaAs with'knowing'and'understanding,'religion,too,ISa 'matter'Not of'belief''faith' or'ritual,'"but," rather,ofexperience, of'practicing'one'sself-chosenprincipledPath.( Read more...Collapse )
Don't Forget Me

	[12 Apr 2005\|12:58am]
dear absurdistanic_flower:I do notwish to bea weightyou feelyou have tocarry.drop my weight,like a rock,into theAbyss,where I have droppedyours.better to chant,and to send each otherLight.Idonot (even)carry any weight (much)( Read more...Collapse )
Don't Forget Me

	[06 Apr 2005\|12:19am]
sittingoutsidebalconycoldnightstrong winds,prayer-flagswhippingsendingyellow candleflickersremainsburningtreesbowingbendingdogs barking,answeringno cloudedstarsunmoving."body agitatedmind serenesould as limpid as a mountain lake."( Read more...Collapse )
Don't Forget Me

	[29 Mar 2005\|06:15pm]
OMThank you SunUltimate force of CompassionYou give to all without discriminationAnd take from noneYou exist out of pure LoveI honor you sun for your light, warmth, ultimate Compassion, absolute Love,And for my consciousness.OMThank you infinite UniverseFor sharing your atoms with meYour existence is BlissYour Cosmic Consciousness is the Great BreathYou are the Primordial essenceYou are the ultimate MysteryLet your Logos guide usSo that we may be one with the flow of the Great BreathNamaste.
Don't Forget Me

[29 Mar 2005|06:15pm]

OMThank you SunUltimate force of CompassionYou give to all without discriminationAnd take from noneYou exist out of pure LoveI honor you sun for your light, warmth, ultimate Compassion, absolute Love,And for my consciousness.OMThank you infinite UniverseFor sharing your atoms with meYour existence is BlissYour Cosmic Consciousness is the Great BreathYou are the Primordial essenceYou are the ultimate MysteryLet your Logos guide usSo that we may be one with the flow of the Great BreathNamaste.

Don't Forget Me

	[28 Mar 2005\|10:44am]
"IT'S NOT (ALL) 'ABOUT' THINKING/KNOWING," A.K.A., "YOU DON'T KNOW 'TIL YOU GET THERE"Hanging-out, 'There,' beyond the "Pairs of Opposites," pure seeing ... 'one' may come to the 'view' that some 'thing' is 'known' 'understood,' "and", in a (certain) 'sense,'( Read more...Collapse )
Don't Forget Me

	[04 Mar 2005\|10:24am]
Not everOh, not everWill it comeTo an end:The drum of,The song ofThe Giver ofLife.We comeTo the magic water.Your wordGoes over the waterWith the water bird.Oh, not everNot everWill it comeTo an end:The drum of,The song ofThe Giver ofLife.Your flowers, this earth:Do they goLike shadows goWhen we goTo the Ghost Place?Oh, not everNot everWill they comeTo an end:The drum of,The song ofThe Giver ofLife.The good trees, the old:Under the branches of,Among the roots ofThe ancient cottonwoodsWill we wake?Oh, not everNot everWill it comeTo an end:The drum of,The song ofThe Giver ofLife.
*1 ~~ Helped me fly** \| Don't Forget Me

[04 Mar 2005|10:24am]

Not everOh, not everWill it comeTo an end:The drum of,The song ofThe Giver ofLife.We comeTo the magic water.Your wordGoes over the waterWith the water bird.Oh, not everNot everWill it comeTo an end:The drum of,The song ofThe Giver ofLife.Your flowers, this earth:Do they goLike shadows goWhen we goTo the Ghost Place?Oh, not everNot everWill they comeTo an end:The drum of,The song ofThe Giver ofLife.The good trees, the old:Under the branches of,Among the roots ofThe ancient cottonwoodsWill we wake?Oh, not everNot everWill it comeTo an end:The drum of,The song ofThe Giver ofLife.

1 ~*~ Helped me fly | Don't Forget Me

	[27 Feb 2005\|10:09am]
Hello, my precious lordso nice to meet you againhereamong the ruins,having migrated back into the shadow-world of the "Cave" weavingnavigatingin and outback and forth among its prisonerswonders all,motives as mixed as their oh so non-pellucid minds filled with curious intent.You expect me to function here,among the blind who think they see,don't you?You,to whom expectationsare merely anotherportion of your dream.( Read more...Collapse )
Don't Forget Me

[27 Feb 2005|10:09am]

Hello, my precious lordso nice to meet you againhereamong the ruins,having migrated back into the shadow-world of the "Cave" weavingnavigatingin and outback and forth among its prisonerswonders all,motives as mixed as their oh so non-pellucid minds filled with curious intent.You expect me to function here,among the blind who think they see,don't you?You,to whom expectationsare merely anotherportion of your dream.( Read more...Collapse )

Don't Forget Me

The face in the moon	[21 Feb 2005\|09:36pm]
The Face in the Moon_You know they say there’s a face in the moon, staring down, watching, and smiling. Giving light to the night, but not too much just enough to make your chin drop in awe, just enough to let everything and everyone know your still there and you haven’t forgotten them. The face I see in the moon…is your face. But you know what? The moon is only a reflection...only a reflection of the beautiful words that fall from your mouth as they drop down to earth. Only a reflection…Only a reflection. No wonder we can’t stare at the sun for too long…_You’re like the sun and the moon to me.You shine so radiantly,But your beauty can never be grasped,Never be touched.But you’re always thereLighting up my lifeUnattainable, in factBut you’re everywhereMaking everything turn to goldAnd when you sleepAnd when you’ve leftYou’re still there burning holes through my heartHiding beneath the earthIn a blanket full of starsThen the moon appearsStill unattainableBut still magnificent in so many waysAnd rays of light flowing through the air, unseen, and unheardBut you can feel themShading all the imperfections of men’s creationsMaking the snow glitter like diamondsAlways there for me…Watching over me…Burning…inside me…
Don't Forget Me

The face in the moon

[21 Feb 2005|09:36pm]

The Face in the Moon_You know they say there’s a face in the moon, staring down, watching, and smiling. Giving light to the night, but not too much just enough to make your chin drop in awe, just enough to let everything and everyone know your still there and you haven’t forgotten them. The face I see in the moon…is your face. But you know what? The moon is only a reflection...only a reflection of the beautiful words that fall from your mouth as they drop down to earth. Only a reflection…Only a reflection. No wonder we can’t stare at the sun for too long…_You’re like the sun and the moon to me.You shine so radiantly,But your beauty can never be grasped,Never be touched.But you’re always thereLighting up my lifeUnattainable, in factBut you’re everywhereMaking everything turn to goldAnd when you sleepAnd when you’ve leftYou’re still there burning holes through my heartHiding beneath the earthIn a blanket full of starsThen the moon appearsStill unattainableBut still magnificent in so many waysAnd rays of light flowing through the air, unseen, and unheardBut you can feel themShading all the imperfections of men’s creationsMaking the snow glitter like diamondsAlways there for me…Watching over me…Burning…inside me…

Don't Forget Me

Pouring from every pore	[21 Feb 2005\|09:31pm]
Pouring from every Pore I noticed how everyone’s perception on love is different. So I thought I should give my idea of love. Love is truth. Love is your family. Love is your friends. Love is opening the door Love is the warm covers that hold you tight in the night. Love is the trees, the grass, and the ever-flowing waterfall of life. Love is every person that crosses your path and changes your life with nothing but a simple smile, a simple word. Love is a kiss. Love is a hug. Love is listening. Love is responding with heart. Love is acceptance. Love is a feeling when a companion enters your life and fills it with words of wisdom, with care, with acceptance of who you are, with morning kisses on the forehead, and with webs of steal as they wait for bad emotions to arise and wrapping it in love and draining it of every drop of energy. Love is war, death, crime, depression, fear, sorrow, and loneliness for making love so loving. Love is reality. Love is dream. Love is in between. Love is seeing eyes filled to the brim of tears consisting only of love. Love is knowing. Love is seeing love. Love is hearing love. Love is seeing children dance and play as they forget the troubles of the world. Love is hating the fact of not being able to hate. Love is loving. Love is being loved. Love is stars for filling in the black spaces. Love is the sun for lighting up the faces torn and jaded of not being loved. Love is the night for shading all the imperfections of men’s creations and the moon for making the rest sparkle like diamonds. Love is everything and everyone. Love is the world. Love is the universe. BUT true love is having a big enough heart to love the entire world for every aspect good and bad, every leaf on every tree, every abusive father that’s so far trapped in his own insecurities and fear of the world and hatred of not being accepted by his own abusive father, every mother who sticks by his side in patience and hope for a better love filled with care and acceptance, and every child that’s lost. Having a big enough heart to look for the love within everyone, whether being drowned by darkness or flowing out of every pore, and trying to bring that out. *That is true love.*
Don't Forget Me

Pouring from every pore

[21 Feb 2005|09:31pm]

Pouring from every Pore I noticed how everyone’s perception on love is different. So I thought I should give my idea of love. Love is truth. Love is your family. Love is your friends. Love is opening the door Love is the warm covers that hold you tight in the night. Love is the trees, the grass, and the ever-flowing waterfall of life. Love is every person that crosses your path and changes your life with nothing but a simple smile, a simple word. Love is a kiss. Love is a hug. Love is listening. Love is responding with heart. Love is acceptance. Love is a feeling when a companion enters your life and fills it with words of wisdom, with care, with acceptance of who you are, with morning kisses on the forehead, and with webs of steal as they wait for bad emotions to arise and wrapping it in love and draining it of every drop of energy. Love is war, death, crime, depression, fear, sorrow, and loneliness for making love so loving. Love is reality. Love is dream. Love is in between. Love is seeing eyes filled to the brim of tears consisting only of love. Love is knowing. Love is seeing love. Love is hearing love. Love is seeing children dance and play as they forget the troubles of the world. Love is hating the fact of not being able to hate. Love is loving. Love is being loved. Love is stars for filling in the black spaces. Love is the sun for lighting up the faces torn and jaded of not being loved. Love is the night for shading all the imperfections of men’s creations and the moon for making the rest sparkle like diamonds. Love is everything and everyone. Love is the world. Love is the universe. BUT true love is having a big enough heart to love the entire world for every aspect good and bad, every leaf on every tree, every abusive father that’s so far trapped in his own insecurities and fear of the world and hatred of not being accepted by his own abusive father, every mother who sticks by his side in patience and hope for a better love filled with care and acceptance, and every child that’s lost. Having a big enough heart to look for the love within everyone, whether being drowned by darkness or flowing out of every pore, and trying to bring that out. That is true love.

Don't Forget Me

Please read: True Story, True Conversation	[19 Feb 2005\|01:37am]
This is a true conversation I had with a friend of mine. Shes a recovering drug addict and just about everyone in her life puts her in a bad position. I would explain more but Im not sure if she would care about me telling her story. But this was the end of our conversation we had just after talking for like an hour about her life and my life and just random things. I hope you can feel and understand the things that I have said in this conversation. Please read.The Secret to life "Can I share something with you?" I asked her sympathetically"Yeah sure" she said "You have to get up though""Ok"I got up and started to walk across the porch. "I'm getting sick and tired of people making life so complicated"with suspense she said "Mmhm" "They ponder and ponder about the secret to life. They keep looking to look and look even more, they never find what they truly need."She kept following me slowly to the backyard steps off the porch. "When all they need to do...is step outside." "Look around""Ok?" she asked but followed directions perfectlyShe looked around for a second and replied"What?" "The secret to life is in the trees, its in the moon. Look at the moon its beautiful. Its in the air, the grass, the birds that hum and sing every morning so you have something to wake up for.""Wow" she said amazed "Now... look at the sky again. See that sky with all of its winking stars, picture that...""That..." I repeated"picture that inside yourself... and let it rise and rise and let it burst from every pore. So instead of waking up for the birds humming and singing outside, wake up for the bird thats humming and singing inside of yourself. Now that is a secret, That is beautiful."She stopped and stared at the sky for atleast five minutes, but before she could turn her head and respond I finished: "About two weeks ago I came outside because I was feeling depressed and I needed a smoke. I was depressed because of what all I've been through and am going through now. I pondered about my life and just life in general. I started to smoke my ciggerette and then...then it hit me! I looked around... and I saw the trees , the grass, the moon, the stars. Whatever it was it was flowing through the air. It hit me...this IS the secret to life. And for the first time in my life, I felt true happiness, I felt true acceptance, I felt true peace within myself, I felt. *I felt!. I wasn't scared anymore, I wasn't insecure anymore, I wasn't afraid to face the world another day. And so I got up and jumped around like I was a little kid and played in the snow and made a snow angel. Most people think about jumping around and doing whatever they want, but they always stop and think "No I can't do that", but... I did. Even though it was freezing cold I layed in the snow for at least 20 minutes. I was shivering like crazy but you know what... It didnt matter because I...I had a smile on my face. Not just a smile, but a smile that ment something. It wasn't fake, it was real and it would last forever inside my mind."* "I'm not sure if you'll understand...feel this now, but I hope you'll find out what I'm talking about one day."
Don't Forget Me

Please read: True Story, True Conversation

[19 Feb 2005|01:37am]

This is a true conversation I had with a friend of mine. Shes a recovering drug addict and just about everyone in her life puts her in a bad position. I would explain more but Im not sure if she would care about me telling her story. But this was the end of our conversation we had just after talking for like an hour about her life and my life and just random things. I hope you can feel and understand the things that I have said in this conversation. Please read.The Secret to life "Can I share something with you?" I asked her sympathetically"Yeah sure" she said "You have to get up though""Ok"I got up and started to walk across the porch. "I'm getting sick and tired of people making life so complicated"with suspense she said "Mmhm" "They ponder and ponder about the secret to life. They keep looking to look and look even more, they never find what they truly need."She kept following me slowly to the backyard steps off the porch. "When all they need to do...is step outside." "Look around""Ok?" she asked but followed directions perfectlyShe looked around for a second and replied"What?" "The secret to life is in the trees, its in the moon. Look at the moon its beautiful. Its in the air, the grass, the birds that hum and sing every morning so you have something to wake up for.""Wow" she said amazed "Now... look at the sky again. See that sky with all of its winking stars, picture that...""That..." I repeated"picture that inside yourself... and let it rise and rise and let it burst from every pore. So instead of waking up for the birds humming and singing outside, wake up for the bird thats humming and singing inside of yourself. Now that is a secret, That is beautiful."She stopped and stared at the sky for atleast five minutes, but before she could turn her head and respond I finished: "About two weeks ago I came outside because I was feeling depressed and I needed a smoke. I was depressed because of what all I've been through and am going through now. I pondered about my life and just life in general. I started to smoke my ciggerette and then...then it hit me! I looked around... and I saw the trees , the grass, the moon, the stars. Whatever it was it was flowing through the air. It hit me...this IS the secret to life. And for the first time in my life, I felt true happiness, I felt true acceptance, I felt true peace within myself, I felt. I felt!. I wasn't scared anymore, I wasn't insecure anymore, I wasn't afraid to face the world another day. And so I got up and jumped around like I was a little kid and played in the snow and made a snow angel. Most people think about jumping around and doing whatever they want, but they always stop and think "No I can't do that", but... I did. Even though it was freezing cold I layed in the snow for at least 20 minutes. I was shivering like crazy but you know what... It didnt matter because I...I had a smile on my face. Not just a smile, but a smile that ment something. It wasn't fake, it was real and it would last forever inside my mind." "I'm not sure if you'll understand...feel this now, but I hope you'll find out what I'm talking about one day."

Don't Forget Me

	[17 Feb 2005\|11:52pm]
though'time'ISan 'illusion,'"if"I were youI would'use'it ..."wisely ...""for,"(even)'illusions''have'their'seasons' ---you know,"and,"like 'seasons,'they'come'"and"they'go.'theproblem,"of course,"with the'time-illusion'( Read more...Collapse )
Don't Forget Me

	[17 Feb 2005\|02:42pm]
Science will spread its branchesAnd these words that cannot be read…must be readThe feeling of understanding And the understanding of feeling…must be feltAnd the feeling that cannot be felt…must be feltThe words of understandingAnd the understanding of wordsMust be read, must be heardAnd the love that cannot be loved…must be lovedThe heart of understandingAnd the understanding of heartForever and foreverMust beatOn and onLoudly and clearlyAnd the day will comeWhen words melt into feelingsAnd feelings burn into wordsAnd when the day comesScience will grow into natureAnd everyone will seeEveryone will hearAnd everyone will flow down the riverInto an ocean of never-ending nothing.I had a dream where I fell into an ocean. And every part of me was consumed in the mouth of this creature. Above me the water went on and on, forever and forever in every which direction. It was so vast, so overwhelming. I had been engulfed in the beauty of death. All that water seemed like nothing to me, but I could feel every part of it, I was as big as the universe, and no longer was I isolated. From then on I knew the word nothing was impossible. Nothing was everything. Nothing was more than I knew now. Nothing was more than I could ever know.
Don't Forget Me

[17 Feb 2005|02:42pm]

Science will spread its branchesAnd these words that cannot be read…must be readThe feeling of understanding And the understanding of feeling…must be feltAnd the feeling that cannot be felt…must be feltThe words of understandingAnd the understanding of wordsMust be read, must be heardAnd the love that cannot be loved…must be lovedThe heart of understandingAnd the understanding of heartForever and foreverMust beatOn and onLoudly and clearlyAnd the day will comeWhen words melt into feelingsAnd feelings burn into wordsAnd when the day comesScience will grow into natureAnd everyone will seeEveryone will hearAnd everyone will flow down the riverInto an ocean of never-ending nothing.I had a dream where I fell into an ocean. And every part of me was consumed in the mouth of this creature. Above me the water went on and on, forever and forever in every which direction. It was so vast, so overwhelming. I had been engulfed in the beauty of death. All that water seemed like nothing to me, but I could feel every part of it, I was as big as the universe, and no longer was I isolated. From then on I knew the word nothing was impossible. Nothing was everything. Nothing was more than I knew now. Nothing was more than I could ever know.

Don't Forget Me

	[17 Feb 2005\|02:41pm]
A forest in the sky_So what awaits me is a forest in the sky. The forest of knowing is this forest. A forest of feeling is this forest. A forest of love is this forest. And everyone who lives here understands everything, not with thought, but with feeling. And everyone will live in peace with acceptance in the core of their hearts. Everyone will know, they will know the art of knowing. And the secret to life lies on the leaves on every tree. And love exists in the raindrops as they fall down to the ground and seep slowly into each magical seed. The bark on every tree will heal the troubled minds of all who live in this forest in the sky. And the branches will hold the massive weight of the love of all as a whole, in this forest in the sky…_And I shall wander within the darkened depths of my mindBut wander…I wonder, how I’ll wander?That decision I’m afraid will be determine by the pureness of my heartBut wander…I wonder, where I’ll wander?That decision I’m afraid will be determine by my guide’s guiding handsBut wander…I wonder, what I’ll see while I wander?That decision I’m afraid lies in the eyes of my demonsAnd I shall see demons of many colorsRed, white and blue and the stars of controlHorns shall grow from the mirrorThe mirror of denied truthI shall kiss the lips of helAnd bestow an intriguing smileAnd I shall return the favors Of a thousand tormented soulsBeing enslaved for hundreds of yearsAs nothing but a mere walkwayWithout fear. Without regret I shall walk right out againWalking tall, Walking fineI’ll walk back into the depths of reality’s foolAnd live among the blindedAnd then, then I shall return to my homeI shall return to my forest of knowing…
Don't Forget Me

[17 Feb 2005|02:41pm]

A forest in the sky_So what awaits me is a forest in the sky. The forest of knowing is this forest. A forest of feeling is this forest. A forest of love is this forest. And everyone who lives here understands everything, not with thought, but with feeling. And everyone will live in peace with acceptance in the core of their hearts. Everyone will know, they will know the art of knowing. And the secret to life lies on the leaves on every tree. And love exists in the raindrops as they fall down to the ground and seep slowly into each magical seed. The bark on every tree will heal the troubled minds of all who live in this forest in the sky. And the branches will hold the massive weight of the love of all as a whole, in this forest in the sky…_And I shall wander within the darkened depths of my mindBut wander…I wonder, how I’ll wander?That decision I’m afraid will be determine by the pureness of my heartBut wander…I wonder, where I’ll wander?That decision I’m afraid will be determine by my guide’s guiding handsBut wander…I wonder, what I’ll see while I wander?That decision I’m afraid lies in the eyes of my demonsAnd I shall see demons of many colorsRed, white and blue and the stars of controlHorns shall grow from the mirrorThe mirror of denied truthI shall kiss the lips of helAnd bestow an intriguing smileAnd I shall return the favors Of a thousand tormented soulsBeing enslaved for hundreds of yearsAs nothing but a mere walkwayWithout fear. Without regret I shall walk right out againWalking tall, Walking fineI’ll walk back into the depths of reality’s foolAnd live among the blindedAnd then, then I shall return to my homeI shall return to my forest of knowing…

Don't Forget Me

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