dbs45 - Profile (original) (raw)

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|| INTRODUCTION ||
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Welcome to the Department of Bad Slash.

"Careful, don't fall over the amp. And shut the door, you're disturbing the Quantum Weather Butterflies!"

Well, this is Response Centre 45, in the Department of Bad Slash. The long-haired rocker over there is the Trojanhorse, usually better known as Trojie; the one with the red eyes and fangs is Soulshadow. Don't annoy her; she's a demon and has a nasty habit of setting things on fire...

The Protectors of the Plot Continuum, or PPC, as you may be aware, is a fine institution founded by the Plants Upstairs, and brought to the attention of the world by Agents Acacia and Jay of the Mary-Sue Department (read their original adventures at the PPC homepage
). Since their retirement, the torch has been carried on by many like-minded PPC agents... including Trojie and Soul of the Bad Slash Department.

Trojie and Soul travel, at great personal risk, into the continuums created by such great authors as Tolkien and Rowling, to save them from the screw-ups caused by writers of Bad Slash. Since Trojie is a hard rocker as well, real-people slash is not unknown to them, although it does tend to get them a bit more homicidal than usual (well. Not that it takes much to get Soul homicidal).

Comments are welcomed at soulshadowdiamond@yahoo.co.uk. Please note flames will be laughed at and possibly, in true Jay and Acacia style, used either to torture Author-wraiths, or just for keeping warm in colder fics.

That said... please feel free to hang around, laugh at the author-wraiths and blink at some people's lack of comprehension of where the 'spellcheck' button is in Word. Just don't disturb the Weather Butterflies.

(Which, by the way, do not belong to us. They come from Pratchett's Discworld. Actually, none of this except Trojie and Soul belong to Trojie and Soul. Except the posters in the response centre, and the amp. And the guitar. And the dogs, but even Deimos is based on a Tolkien-created animal. Disclaimer, short version: We own just about nothing).

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|| SERIOUSLY... Disclaimer and Warnings ||
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The continuua we enter -- which to date includes Tolkien's and Jackson's Middle-earths and several instances of real-people fic set, apparently, in our world; also Pratchett's Discworld and, we predict, quite soon Rowling's Harry Potter world -- do not belong to us. We make no claim to them, their characters or situations. None of the items the Agents pinch from said continuua are actually our property. And the original idea for the PPC belongs to Jay and Acacia; we're merely continuing their good work.

If you are a Mary-Sue writer or Mary-Sue sympathetic, you probably won't enjoy Jay and Acacia's original PPC. If you're a fan of Bad Slash, you probably won't be too keen on Trojie and Soul's escapades. If you're the writer of any of the fics the Agents exorcise, you'll probably be homicidal.

Please understand that we're not really ogres, canon-nazis or any better than you. We just feel that there are some fics out there too terrible to continue unchecked. This is, however, at its heart just two like-minded students having fun, without intending to cause offence or hurt. And if we do, we apologise; but from the response to the original PPC -- just check out their spinoffs page! -- we're sure there are a hell of a lot more people out there who think like us, so try to take this light-heartedly, as it was intended, and have fun!

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|| QUESTIONS? ||
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Question us in a comment or email; we'll be glad to answer if we can. One question to veto here and now, I'm afraid, is "Can I join?" The answer will be no. We'd love you to watch us and comment all over the place, but we're keeping membership to the Agents purely for ease of updating and reading. Hopefully, this will make everything easier both for us and for you. Add us to your watch list though, and comments are always welcomed!

Oh, and the URL -- DBS45, that is -- comes from Department of Bad Slash, Response Centre No.45. But you knew that one. ^_^ That's where the Agents hide out when they're not out exorcising. It's quite cosy by now, complete with posters, Trojie's amp, Soul's pile of cushions, and two huge dogs. Come in if you can get in.