dorcus (original) (raw)

So.

After absolutely everything of the last year, but in particular of this last summer, I walked into my office today and Kynn says "this isn't working out". What isn't working out? I'm not, apparently. I started there on April 1st, 2002 and today is October 13th, 2003, but apparently they realize now that I'm not "working out". Kynn sited my work ethic as one of the key reasons they were letting me go. The reason they were firing me Monday morning.

You know, the company that couldn't keep a paycheck from bouncing, and then just didn't pay people the entire month of July, is siting work ethics at me. The company where Liz held an update on her desk for two months before handing it off to me, only to try and hold a meeting on why I was so late on getting this finished. The same Liz who sent me angry emails asking why I was doing something like X versus Y -- but could never bring herself to stand up and walk the five feet to ask me this with her voice. The company that brought my paycheck to my wedding because it couldn't be cut when it was actually due the week before. I had to remind them to please give it to my Mother in Law, as I was just a tad busy at the moment.

I was bitter and extremely dejected for about two hours. The sheer amount of rude injustice heaved upon me this morning was just absurd. I'm mostly better now, but this is still a gigantic blow in more ways then one. We've had to borrow quite a bit of money from people just to make ends meet (you might remember the July weekend of San Diego Comic Con where I'd wanted to attend, but we had to borrow money from my Grandmother just to buy food. Kynn and Liz went, though, of course). Not only are we not out of the hole, but we still have mile high debt to overcome.

I know the reasons they (read: Kynn, Liz was too busy hiding her head in the sand of her office -- I know, who would have thought) sited are bunk. No, I haven't been the best of Busy Bee's recently. With Josh only recently being employed, and the difficulties with my Sister (and the ever on going issues with my Father), I've been a touch distracted. And, you know, that whole episode with the copious amounts of vomiting in where no one quite knew what was wrong with me also took a moment of my time. But Liz ran that company right into the ground, and by the time Kynn felt it important enough to pay attention, things were down right scary. I'll be really surprised if IMI is running in another year, two at most. Or, if it is, it'll be like it was in 95: Liz and Kynn working other jobs with IMI as some sort of side project. I wasn't fired because I'm a bad worker, I was fired because they can't afford me. They just can't bring themselves to say or admit that.

Eventually we'll both rewrite versions of today for ourselves. In the long run, it really won't matter. But right now, I have a lot of balls in the air that need juggling and just not enough hands to catch them with.

Edit: I've been asked: Which Monday morning? This Monday morning. I'm sorry if I didn't make that clear. I walked in and there was a box waiting for me on my chair. I had to call Josh back and ask him to take me home. And they know Josh just drops me off, so the whole thing was very very ugly.