The Sacred Place's Journal (original) (raw)

new member	[06 Oct 2007\|06:43pm]
Hello, my name is Mandy. I'm 19 and belong to Ste. Marie's parish in Manchester, NH, which i adore grately. I have met so many wonderful friends, and am very thankful for them. I have the 4-5PM hour in our parish's perpetual adoration chapel, on Thursdays, as well as the 3-4PM hour on Sundays, and iam hour captian for 3-4PM and 8-9PM. I also serve as a lector, eucharistic Minister, religious education teacher, and director of Speakers for the Charismatic Prayer group. I also am currently planning a Breast Cancer Awareness event to take place this coming summer.I recently lost both grandmothers, one on Valentine's day, and one just last Thursday, and my father passed away in 2005. I plan on attending Mount Ida college for a double major in Funeral Home Service and Beareavement Studies, with hopes of starting a ministry at my church for grieving teens children and young adults. Just thought i'd introduce myself, feel free to write back or add me as a friend.
Cry Out.

[06 Oct 2007|06:43pm]

Hello, my name is Mandy. I'm 19 and belong to Ste. Marie's parish in Manchester, NH, which i adore grately. I have met so many wonderful friends, and am very thankful for them. I have the 4-5PM hour in our parish's perpetual adoration chapel, on Thursdays, as well as the 3-4PM hour on Sundays, and iam hour captian for 3-4PM and 8-9PM. I also serve as a lector, eucharistic Minister, religious education teacher, and director of Speakers for the Charismatic Prayer group. I also am currently planning a Breast Cancer Awareness event to take place this coming summer.I recently lost both grandmothers, one on Valentine's day, and one just last Thursday, and my father passed away in 2005. I plan on attending Mount Ida college for a double major in Funeral Home Service and Beareavement Studies, with hopes of starting a ministry at my church for grieving teens children and young adults. Just thought i'd introduce myself, feel free to write back or add me as a friend.

Cry Out.

A new post.	[24 Feb 2007\|12:45am]
I may begin using this community to make posts once again. I have experienced something of an emotional collapse and need a place to recouperate. If anyone has an objection to this then please, comment and let me know.In the meanwhile, this is where I shall go to drown my own sorrows. I have lost many things most dear to me. I am not certain how long I shall be able to go on.
1 Tear - Cry Out.

The Silence Between Us...	[29 May 2006\|06:23pm]
There's not been a voice here in ages, not since I last mentioned the distance; aside from offerings to 'join here' and 'visit there'. That's not what this community is for..it's not for directing people elsewhere. It's for helping those whom are already here..I have patiently waited for another's voice to enlighten me, yet there has not been a soul to walk into my life in the last two years whom I could honestly say has moved me. In the last three years, we have gone quiet and seemingly all but forgotten about ourselves.I wish that I could say I have forgotten myself.As time has passed, I have experienced situations that both have brought me fear and left me in a state of confusion. There has been more than one account in the past year where I have come to question if I'm being punished by some greater source for the trials I have come to face. I have even been placed in a time when my own partner, the absolute love of my life has questioned whether or not we are safe anymore. And as it stands, his vision is not shared with mine - he, like so many others, question whether or not what we see is true. Yet, even still..he has been exposed to the phenominon and questions the reality of things.Something incredible happened to us, but amazingly unsettling. While I'll not get into the entirety of the tale..to simply explain what happened would not do it justice. So, I'll make best with what I can..We had been mislead by an entity.The occasion was simply put to be one that made no sense. In a split moment, for a fraction of time - we were utterly blind to one another.My love stood in the room before me, and I could not see him or hear him and he did not see me. The room was completely different from one moment to the next from the time it took him to enter, leave and come back - everything had changed. Not only so, but when he entered the room; he and his friend was utterly invisible to me.I question now why this happened to us, because as the scenario worked out with minimal detail..from my fiance's perspective it had looked like that I and our second friend were being unfaithful. However, I hadn't left the chair I was in since he had left the house. It was as though someone or something wanted us to be at odds with one another. It was so awful that I was reduced to tears, begging my fiance that whatever looked as though it happened, had not. And in all truth, I had been waiting, watching the door for him to come home. I heard his voice..but he never opened the door to our room.Why did that happened?..I can't say.It's not the only thing that has occured though..I have been plagued by nightmares ever since. Usually, they are never the same - something is always chasing me though..something I usually never see.I ask now, why are you pursuing me? What have I taken from you..that you must try and take everything from me; my invisible friend?
4 Tears - Cry Out.

The Silence Between Us...

[29 May 2006|06:23pm]

There's not been a voice here in ages, not since I last mentioned the distance; aside from offerings to 'join here' and 'visit there'. That's not what this community is for..it's not for directing people elsewhere. It's for helping those whom are already here..I have patiently waited for another's voice to enlighten me, yet there has not been a soul to walk into my life in the last two years whom I could honestly say has moved me. In the last three years, we have gone quiet and seemingly all but forgotten about ourselves.I wish that I could say I have forgotten myself.As time has passed, I have experienced situations that both have brought me fear and left me in a state of confusion. There has been more than one account in the past year where I have come to question if I'm being punished by some greater source for the trials I have come to face. I have even been placed in a time when my own partner, the absolute love of my life has questioned whether or not we are safe anymore. And as it stands, his vision is not shared with mine - he, like so many others, question whether or not what we see is true. Yet, even still..he has been exposed to the phenominon and questions the reality of things.Something incredible happened to us, but amazingly unsettling. While I'll not get into the entirety of the tale..to simply explain what happened would not do it justice. So, I'll make best with what I can..We had been mislead by an entity.The occasion was simply put to be one that made no sense. In a split moment, for a fraction of time - we were utterly blind to one another.My love stood in the room before me, and I could not see him or hear him and he did not see me. The room was completely different from one moment to the next from the time it took him to enter, leave and come back - everything had changed. Not only so, but when he entered the room; he and his friend was utterly invisible to me.I question now why this happened to us, because as the scenario worked out with minimal detail..from my fiance's perspective it had looked like that I and our second friend were being unfaithful. However, I hadn't left the chair I was in since he had left the house. It was as though someone or something wanted us to be at odds with one another. It was so awful that I was reduced to tears, begging my fiance that whatever looked as though it happened, had not. And in all truth, I had been waiting, watching the door for him to come home. I heard his voice..but he never opened the door to our room.Why did that happened?..I can't say.It's not the only thing that has occured though..I have been plagued by nightmares ever since. Usually, they are never the same - something is always chasing me though..something I usually never see.I ask now, why are you pursuing me? What have I taken from you..that you must try and take everything from me; my invisible friend?

4 Tears - Cry Out.

Come join us :)	[30 Mar 2006\|09:40pm]
We are an evolving community, focussed on a variety of spiritual areas and open to all beliefs and opinions. The only rule is a rule of mutual respect. The forums cover many areas, including mediumship, healing, tarot, spiritual growth, inspirations, writing, art, politics, ecology, science, fun and games and various belief systems. There are also free readings offered. The only rule is that respect is shown to other members and their beliefs and opinions. It is a friendly and open community where we like everyone to share freely, so please do come along and have a look(just click on the forum link)...and join us if you like what you see. Kate http://www.unityofspirit.co.uk
Cry Out.

Come join us :)

[30 Mar 2006|09:40pm]

We are an evolving community, focussed on a variety of spiritual areas and open to all beliefs and opinions. The only rule is a rule of mutual respect. The forums cover many areas, including mediumship, healing, tarot, spiritual growth, inspirations, writing, art, politics, ecology, science, fun and games and various belief systems. There are also free readings offered. The only rule is that respect is shown to other members and their beliefs and opinions. It is a friendly and open community where we like everyone to share freely, so please do come along and have a look(just click on the forum link)...and join us if you like what you see. Kate http://www.unityofspirit.co.uk

Cry Out.

	[13 Jul 2005\|10:54am]
hello everyoneI made an new AIM accountits on aol and its called crimsonviolin23so let me know what your is and we can talk
Cry Out.

	[30 Jun 2005\|04:29pm]
We've been quiet for a time..Whether it is because our lives have not allowed us to come and gather, or simply because we have had not had anything to say. I've been put in such a place now, unable to work or play..I had a free moment where I could share a bit of my time with you all.You know, it's easy to say that "God is picking on me" when things in your life go bad. It's also equally easy to blame any problem on some greater, more powerful force. Now most of the time it isn't the fact, but sometimes somethings leave you to wonder.A good example is what happened to my fiance.We went out to a friends house, had to run to the store. Friend gives us money, my fiance puts it in his wallet. We get to the store, he gives me the money and tells me to use my debit card. We do such, leave and when it's time to come home, my fiance cannot find his wallet. We looked up and down the street for it, no where to be seen. Angry and frustraited we came home with no wallet. When we walked in the front door our dog was an excited mess, and she had to go outside to use the bathroom. So my fiance walked through the house to the back door and opened it - and there on the back deck right in front of him was his wallet.There was no possible way that could have happened, absolutely none. There was no mistakes, our friend had even seen my fiance put the money in his wallet. But yet, there it was..You know, that was only a starter..After that..many things started disappearing. Accidents started happening. I got hurt, lost my job, the tire blew out on our car, we weren't able to buy groceries, pay our debts, get our new drivers liscences..And the nightmares started again.I didn't tell my fiance about them, I didn't want to dwell on what I had been seeing in my dreams. But I would wake up in the morning with a sick stomach turning because of the visions I had seen. God awful horrible things that not even the saneist mind could comprehend. Things like...seeing one of my most beloved pets....walking like the dead. I won't go into details how graphic it was..but needless to say it made Pet Semetary look like a birthday party thrown by Bozo the Clown.The dreams..are often like that now. Ever since it started..they range from bad to worse.Now it's easy for me to say.."Some greater being is out there fucking with me.."Because I swear they are.smiles
1 Tear - Cry Out.

[30 Jun 2005|04:29pm]

We've been quiet for a time..Whether it is because our lives have not allowed us to come and gather, or simply because we have had not had anything to say. I've been put in such a place now, unable to work or play..I had a free moment where I could share a bit of my time with you all.You know, it's easy to say that "God is picking on me" when things in your life go bad. It's also equally easy to blame any problem on some greater, more powerful force. Now most of the time it isn't the fact, but sometimes somethings leave you to wonder.A good example is what happened to my fiance.We went out to a friends house, had to run to the store. Friend gives us money, my fiance puts it in his wallet. We get to the store, he gives me the money and tells me to use my debit card. We do such, leave and when it's time to come home, my fiance cannot find his wallet. We looked up and down the street for it, no where to be seen. Angry and frustraited we came home with no wallet. When we walked in the front door our dog was an excited mess, and she had to go outside to use the bathroom. So my fiance walked through the house to the back door and opened it - and there on the back deck right in front of him was his wallet.There was no possible way that could have happened, absolutely none. There was no mistakes, our friend had even seen my fiance put the money in his wallet. But yet, there it was..You know, that was only a starter..After that..many things started disappearing. Accidents started happening. I got hurt, lost my job, the tire blew out on our car, we weren't able to buy groceries, pay our debts, get our new drivers liscences..And the nightmares started again.I didn't tell my fiance about them, I didn't want to dwell on what I had been seeing in my dreams. But I would wake up in the morning with a sick stomach turning because of the visions I had seen. God awful horrible things that not even the saneist mind could comprehend. Things like...seeing one of my most beloved pets....walking like the dead. I won't go into details how graphic it was..but needless to say it made Pet Semetary look like a birthday party thrown by Bozo the Clown.The dreams..are often like that now. Ever since it started..they range from bad to worse.Now it's easy for me to say.."Some greater being is out there fucking with me.."Because I swear they are.*smiles*

1 Tear - Cry Out.

	[15 May 2005\|11:46am]
[ mood \| depressed ] It seems a lot of us are just upset, irritable and depressed lately.. I'm glad it's not just me! But hey its Star Wars EIII opening week.. and I managed to inadvertantly get opening day off.. wooo for something going right this week.I am a grump this day. Don't mean to be, but man I could use some distractions! Anyone around? (Yahoo DivineVitality and AIM DiagaBeocht)
1 Tear - Cry Out.

	[15 May 2005\|09:35am]
[ mood \| confused ] Last night's dream ...I was an angel, but not as I am now. Here, it was as though I had merged completely with my body-self. I lived in a community with many humans, something like a small town. Unlike now, I was given a task, although I do not know who appointed me to it. My role was to be part of this town, to observe and to learn from them about their emotions. This town was "invaded" by a group of vampires, led by a woman who looked exactly like me as I am now. The only difference was that she had no wings. She predated upon the people of the town until they were forced to flee, but many had to be left behind, including some that had become very dear to me. I could not bear to leave them, and found myself in the grip of absolute heartbreak, completely shattered by these new emotions. I decided to go back to the town and find them, although in my heart I knew they would already be dead. I knew I would have to confront the woman and was determined to kill her, or drive her off for good. Unfortunately, I was awakened at this point.I do not for one moment believe that this was a memory, but the splitting of my self into two distinct natures has disturbed me greatly. I had always believed that I was one being, sharing a body with a human woman, but I do not know what to make of this dream. It is as though, in the dream, I was rejecting the vampiric side of my nature utterly, though I have never thought of it as anything other than my basic essence.(Jung would, no doubt, term this a Shadow dream ... yet this dream split what is whole, rather than work to reconcile ego and unconscious.)I would appreciate any thoughts ...
4 Tears - Cry Out.

[15 May 2005|09:35am]

[ **mood** |

confused ] Last night's dream ...I was an angel, but not as I am now. Here, it was as though I had merged completely with my body-self. I lived in a community with many humans, something like a small town. Unlike now, I was given a task, although I do not know who appointed me to it. My role was to be part of this town, to observe and to learn from them about their emotions. This town was "invaded" by a group of vampires, led by a woman who looked exactly like me as I am now. The only difference was that she had no wings. She predated upon the people of the town until they were forced to flee, but many had to be left behind, including some that had become very dear to me. I could not bear to leave them, and found myself in the grip of absolute heartbreak, completely shattered by these new emotions. I decided to go back to the town and find them, although in my heart I knew they would already be dead. I knew I would have to confront the woman and was determined to kill her, or drive her off for good. Unfortunately, I was awakened at this point.I do not for one moment believe that this was a memory, but the splitting of my self into two distinct natures has disturbed me greatly. I had always believed that I was one being, sharing a body with a human woman, but I do not know what to make of this dream. It is as though, in the dream, I was rejecting the vampiric side of my nature utterly, though I have never thought of it as anything other than my basic essence.(Jung would, no doubt, term this a Shadow dream ... yet this dream split what is whole, rather than work to reconcile ego and unconscious.)I would appreciate any thoughts ...

4 Tears - Cry Out.

	[13 May 2005\|06:36am]
I realized that my fantasy future that I have built in my mind may never come to be. I realized that despite what I feel and I know he feels that there may never be trust between us. Last night I broke down. In the end the Marine may win afterall.And I am terrified.You can read more below.Unravelled.In spirit and in flight,~Kit MacGaradhMay your wings always ride the wind.
2 Tears - Cry Out.

Day Two	[11 May 2005\|04:17pm]
Perhaps you are curious and just want to know what made me so nuerotic that I would toss aside my own mate. This is your chance find out. I look forward to your comments, support, criticism and the conversations that will arise from them. I will also post a brief introduction tomorrow after I have calmed down a bit from the writing excrusion I made today unexpectedly at work. I will warn you that you may need tissues, I know I did writing it.Sadly the things I wrote about are not a soap opera, no matter how bad they seem. They were likely actually worse as my natural instincts for defensive reasons are to bury it all as deep as I can so I do not have to deal with it ever again. I have skipped over some things, topics that I am not ready to discuss. These include the details of my rape and sodomy at the hands of my husband, my return to cutting among other things.Yours, Kit MacGaradhOf course cross posted to the groups I belong too.
Cry Out.

Day Two

[11 May 2005|04:17pm]

Perhaps you are curious and just want to know what made me so nuerotic that I would toss aside my own mate. This is your chance find out. I look forward to your comments, support, criticism and the conversations that will arise from them. I will also post a brief introduction tomorrow after I have calmed down a bit from the writing excrusion I made today unexpectedly at work. I will warn you that you may need tissues, I know I did writing it.Sadly the things I wrote about are not a soap opera, no matter how bad they seem. They were likely actually worse as my natural instincts for defensive reasons are to bury it all as deep as I can so I do not have to deal with it ever again. I have skipped over some things, topics that I am not ready to discuss. These include the details of my rape and sodomy at the hands of my husband, my return to cutting among other things.Yours, Kit MacGaradhOf course cross posted to the groups I belong too.

Cry Out.

Introduction	[10 Apr 2005\|09:30pm]
[ mood \| contemplative ] It seems proper to start with one's name. My own name, however, is lost to me. My body-self calls me Octavia, and as a name, it serves well enough. I have found this community through otherkin links, although I am uncertain whether I am a "fallen" angel. I have described myself to others as a dark angel, and sometimes as a vampire (feeding not upon blood, but rather psychic or emotional energy). My skin is white, and where a human would be pink or brown (such as the nipples and lips), I am grey. My hair and eyes are both black, and from time to time, wings manifest the colour of raven's feathers. My memories are confused; I remember a maze of ice, in the centre of which was my home. I remember awakening to my body-self. There was a time before; I have only glimpses, fleeting images of not being alone, of knowing and being known by others like me. Is this usual? Do others have such memories?
6 Tears - Cry Out.

Introduction

[10 Apr 2005|09:30pm]

[ **mood** |

contemplative ] It seems proper to start with one's name. My own name, however, is lost to me. My body-self calls me Octavia, and as a name, it serves well enough. I have found this community through otherkin links, although I am uncertain whether I am a "fallen" angel. I have described myself to others as a dark angel, and sometimes as a vampire (feeding not upon blood, but rather psychic or emotional energy). My skin is white, and where a human would be pink or brown (such as the nipples and lips), I am grey. My hair and eyes are both black, and from time to time, wings manifest the colour of raven's feathers. My memories are confused; I remember a maze of ice, in the centre of which was my home. I remember awakening to my body-self. There was a time before; I have only glimpses, fleeting images of not being alone, of knowing and being known by others like me. Is this usual? Do others have such memories?

6 Tears - Cry Out.

Hey	[01 Apr 2005\|09:29pm]
[ mood \| curious ] Hey, I'm new...I just kind of stumbled across this place and it seemed interesting, although I'm a little confused...so yeah...I'm probably just going to lurk for a while...My name's Shannon by the way...
Cry Out.

I need some advise... crossposted, alot	[20 Oct 2004\|07:18pm]
As some of you may already know, I recently had my first child (this lifetime anyways.) I've had some of the typical infant problems, but also, some not so typical ones. For instance, the first night home from the hospital, she started dreamwalking (not a big problem, but she scared the shit out of me.) She really hates being changed and also hates being put down. When changing her and when she's not being held, she screams and cries, not a big deal except for the fact that she puts off alot of energy while doing it and has blown out a few light bulbs, cause the DVD player to freeze up and caused the car's engine to sputter. The light bulbs can be replaced and the DVD can be replayed, but I'm really worried about driving with her in the car. If she's asleep, it's not a problem, but twice now she's started crying in the car and caused the engine problems. The first time, I figured out it was her and did my best to contain her energy, but if her father, or one of her grandparents were to take her out... Her father, Russ, could probably contain her (though I had a hard time with it, and I've been working with energy much longer than he has) but none of our parents have even the slightest clue of how to handle that kinda thing. I would have thought that being a new soul, she'd not know how to do much spiritually, ut her instincts are really strong, apparently and it's got me worried. Have any of you dealt with this kinda thig before? Any suggestions?
3 Tears - Cry Out.

I need some advise... *crossposted, alot*

[20 Oct 2004|07:18pm]

As some of you may already know, I recently had my first child (this lifetime anyways.) I've had some of the typical infant problems, but also, some not so typical ones. For instance, the first night home from the hospital, she started dreamwalking (not a big problem, but she scared the shit out of me.) She really hates being changed and also hates being put down. When changing her and when she's not being held, she screams and cries, not a big deal except for the fact that she puts off alot of energy while doing it and has blown out a few light bulbs, cause the DVD player to freeze up and caused the car's engine to sputter. The light bulbs can be replaced and the DVD can be replayed, but I'm really worried about driving with her in the car. If she's asleep, it's not a problem, but twice now she's started crying in the car and caused the engine problems. The first time, I figured out it was her and did my best to contain her energy, but if her father, or one of her grandparents were to take her out... Her father, Russ, could probably contain her (though I had a hard time with it, and I've been working with energy much longer than he has) but none of our parents have even the slightest clue of how to handle that kinda thing. I would have thought that being a new soul, she'd not know how to do much spiritually, ut her instincts are really strong, apparently and it's got me worried. Have any of you dealt with this kinda thig before? Any suggestions?

3 Tears - Cry Out.

I've lost my best friend.	[18 Oct 2004\|09:59pm]
[ mood \| melancholy ] I believed him. I believed he cared. I wrapped the feeling of love around me and used it as a protection I had never had before. I used it when my husband play his 'games' in bed. I used it as a shield when my husband made unreasonable demands of any sort or used me as a whipping post for his anger and frustration. Now my sactuary is gone. The safe spot on my heart I could hide is bare and cold. I have to find other defences, and soon, to survive. Already I've cursed his name in the night.He wanted to end it as 'Friends'. That was soo important to him. Though we could never meet, never touch but in our hearts, I needed him and his love. Now it's gone completely.Obliquus; skew, slanted,turned, twisted, backhanded, circuitous, circular, circumlocutory, collateral, devious, evasive, implied, obliquitous, obscure, roundabout, sidelong, vague.He wont even acknowledge he has said goodbye... He just wants to go and pretend he hasn't gone.And I am alone with my responcibilies, shortcomings, left to fend emotionally....again and now always alone.
2 Tears - Cry Out.

I've lost my best friend.

[18 Oct 2004|09:59pm]

[ **mood** |

melancholy ] I believed him. I believed he cared. I wrapped the feeling of love around me and used it as a protection I had never had before. I used it when my husband play his 'games' in bed. I used it as a shield when my husband made unreasonable demands of any sort or used me as a whipping post for his anger and frustration. Now my sactuary is gone. The safe spot on my heart I could hide is bare and cold. I have to find other defences, and soon, to survive. Already I've cursed his name in the night.He wanted to end it as 'Friends'. That was soo important to him. Though we could never meet, never touch but in our hearts, I needed him and his love. Now it's gone completely.Obliquus; skew, slanted,turned, twisted, backhanded, circuitous, circular, circumlocutory, collateral, devious, evasive, implied, obliquitous, obscure, roundabout, sidelong, vague.He wont even acknowledge he has said goodbye... He just wants to go and pretend he hasn't gone.And I am alone with my responcibilies, shortcomings, left to fend emotionally....again and now always alone.

2 Tears - Cry Out.

	[03 Oct 2004\|12:05am]
[ mood \| hopeful ] Hi. I suppose I identify as an angel of sorts. I plan on lurking, maybe commenting on some old entries if it strikes my fancy. shrug wave
7 Tears - Cry Out.

^.^	[02 Sep 2004\|12:44am]
[ mood \| curious ] I'm looking for someone to hold an intellectual conversation with about Angels and life as a person with an angelic past, if anyone is interested please contact me. ~Jibrille
5 Tears - Cry Out.

Because I Loved You So	[11 Jun 2004\|04:21am]
[ mood \| wandering ] Need makes strange things happen. Need is as powerful as time in some aspects. Need for another can make beautiful wings crumble, can clog your throat with your own feathers to keep you from crying out. Even the cosmos don't like to hear us cry over our own mistakes. Need pushes us on to discovery. I discovered my ancestry. It discovered me, mostly. The dreams revealed to me what I am, long before I knew the truth about my bloodline. There is one dream that I want to tell about, because it bears interpreting and sometimes even the most powerful eye needs assistance. They were circling all around me, chanting. I felt the light of the moon hit me, physically felt the cold wet of moonbeams trickling down my arms like raindrops. When it was time to go, I bade everyone farewell and begged them all to drink ice water before leaving, to be careful driving home. I stood there watching others pass through the door. A wise old man passed me on his way out, saying, "Don't fret, you are with child." I looked down but could not tell. As I passed through the doorway, the last one out, I was suspended in time. My head launched back, exposing my neck, and for a moment there was another figure in my place: a tall, robed creature, with the outline of a human and the head of a crow, but veiled, carrying a staff. It was me, I was it. The air around me was blue, crackling. I felt no pain, no fear, just Becoming. Then I avoided the touch of all around me. After I woke up, I avoided touch for a week, because the inner voice told me that I must stay pure. Please tell me what this all means.
1 Tear - Cry Out.

Because I Loved You So

[11 Jun 2004|04:21am]

[ mood | wandering ] Need makes strange things happen. Need is as powerful as time in some aspects. Need for another can make beautiful wings crumble, can clog your throat with your own feathers to keep you from crying out. Even the cosmos don't like to hear us cry over our own mistakes. Need pushes us on to discovery. I discovered my ancestry. It discovered me, mostly. The dreams revealed to me what I am, long before I knew the truth about my bloodline. There is one dream that I want to tell about, because it bears interpreting and sometimes even the most powerful eye needs assistance. They were circling all around me, chanting. I felt the light of the moon hit me, physically felt the cold wet of moonbeams trickling down my arms like raindrops. When it was time to go, I bade everyone farewell and begged them all to drink ice water before leaving, to be careful driving home. I stood there watching others pass through the door. A wise old man passed me on his way out, saying, "Don't fret, you are with child." I looked down but could not tell. As I passed through the doorway, the last one out, I was suspended in time. My head launched back, exposing my neck, and for a moment there was another figure in my place: a tall, robed creature, with the outline of a human and the head of a crow, but veiled, carrying a staff. It was me, I was it. The air around me was blue, crackling. I felt no pain, no fear, just Becoming. Then I avoided the touch of all around me. After I woke up, I avoided touch for a week, because the inner voice told me that I must stay pure. Please tell me what this all means.

1 Tear - Cry Out.

	[13 Apr 2004\|01:43pm]
[ mood \| sad ] After been advised ages ago to join this community I joined. Maybe you've seen me around once_winged, otherkin or fae_hearts.I'm an Angelic, but chance I happened to stumble upon once_winged and I started to awaken from there. A lot of stuff makes sense now. But like everything else in this divine universe the more questions that answered, more questions come about so...Here I am! Heh, sorry, I'm usually more cheerful than this but I'd had a bad couple of days net wise. Anywayz, continueing on, I've always known I was -different- somehow and I've always had liking for helping people. The wings have a tendancy to bop up more these days and I can remember deciding to leave the divine. Didn't agree with a lot of stuff that was happening and I wanted to learn, to understand, to suffer, to feel. I wanted more so I left.I seem to have a special spot for Persephone, maybe because it was the first Greek myth either read to me, but it's always strike a chord in me. No idea why, no idea how?Love & Light, Anya
4 Tears - Cry Out.

[13 Apr 2004|01:43pm]

[ **mood** |

sad ] After been advised ages ago to join this community I joined. Maybe you've seen me around

once_winged,

otherkin or

fae_hearts.I'm an Angelic, but chance I happened to stumble upon

once_winged and I started to awaken from there. A lot of stuff makes sense now. But like everything else in this divine universe the more questions that answered, more questions come about so...Here I am! Heh, sorry, I'm usually more cheerful than this but I'd had a bad couple of days net wise. Anywayz, continueing on, I've always known I was -different- somehow and I've always had liking for helping people. The wings have a tendancy to bop up more these days and I can remember deciding to leave the divine. Didn't agree with a lot of stuff that was happening and I wanted to learn, to understand, to suffer, to feel. I wanted more so I left.I seem to have a special spot for Persephone, maybe because it was the first Greek myth either read to me, but it's always strike a chord in me. No idea why, no idea how?Love & Light, Anya

4 Tears - Cry Out.

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