5 Worst TV Shows of 2014 (original) (raw)

From faux royal romance to Messing around with star talent, the lowest returns for your investment of time

Published on December 4, 2014 05:00AM EST

5. I Wanna Marry Harry (Fox)

Chris Raphael/FOX

The English already suspect that Americans can't tell the difference between an actual member of the royal family and some Tetley's-drunk ginger who might say, '''Allo, guv'nah!'' with a put-on accent. This competition for the heart of the fake prince basically proved them right. Next time, ladies, just Google him.

4. Mulaney (Fox)

John P. Fleenor/FOX

John Mulaney may be a talented scribe and stand-up, but a sitcom star with a compelling vision he's not. His stab at a new-century Seinfeld was stunningly not funny despite his affable (if stiff) presence and a game (yet wasted) cast. There still might be a winning sitcom in him, but he'll have to become a bolder, more seasoned performer first.

3. Constantine (NBC)

Quantrell Colbert/NBC

It's easy to demonize comic-book adaptations because there are just so many of them. But we're bagging on Constantine because it's just bad—a poor fusion of antihero glum and the demon-catcher genre of supernatural series, of which we also need fewer.

2. Utopia (Fox)

John Fleenor / FOX

For network TV, it was a pretty utopian idea: 15 people would spend a year creating an agrarian society to ''find out what they can learn about life, love, and happiness.'' What they learned was that even the most lofty premise can't stop reality TV from devolving into the loudest, drunkest, most stereotype-reinforcing garbage since season 15 of Big Brother.

1. The Mysteries of Laura (NBC)

Will Hart/NBC

From Dylan McDermott on Stalker to Kate Walsh on Bad Judge, this fall has been a rich one for Returning Favorites on New Star Vehicles That Suck. But Laura has been especially sucktastic, trapping Debra Messing, one of our most appealing and versatile actors, on a wonky dramedy that squanders, not showcases, her talent.