Cheating and you, The Complete Story (original) (raw)

Mon, Nov. 2nd, 2009, 10:38 am

srv_1025: I'm so confused...

So I have been dating the same guy for 3 years (he is my first boyfriend), and recently I moved away to college and have started to meet new people and make new friends. Well I met this guy and we really hit it off, so much so that I'm beginning to have feelings for him and I'm pretty sure he has some for me. Like last night for example, Steve (the new guy friend), 2 other friends, and I went out to a playground and were having fun there for awhile, well after we had dropped everybody else off later I still wanted to spend some time with him so we went in my room and layed down and talked. I'm a very physical orientated person so we were close and if I was laying on my back he would have his head resting on my shoulder and if I was on my side he would have his head resting against my back and I loved it. I just feel so comfortable around him and he would say these sweet little comments about how soft my skin was or how nice I smelled and he offered to give me a back massage (I have a bad back) and it was amazing. We fell asleep together and i actually stayed close to him in my sleep which never happens with my boyfriend. I know that what I'm doing is technically cheating and I feel absolutely horrible about it! On one hand my boyfriend can be moody and jealous but he relies on me so much (he has already decided i'm the woman he is going to marry) and I'm the only person he trusts and I know that if I break up with him his whole world would crash and he would be depressed and angry. But on the other hand "Steve" makes me happy and I feel so comfortable around him but I haven't known him for very long. I'm so damn confused and I don't know what to do, i love my boyfriend but I'm starting to love "Steve" too...

Any suggestions?

Sat, Jul. 22nd, 2006, 12:35 am

simplybasics: (no subject)

im new here.

i guess im in a different boat than some of you. most of you seem to be older and cheating with married men, but im only 16 years old. i have been cheating on my boyfriend with a 25 year old man who lives with his girlfriend. we are both very unhappy in our relationships and see eye to eye on a lot of things. hes saving up money to leave her and to eventually be with me. i trust him more than anyone ive ever known..

my boyfriend treats me so terribly and i just dont know how to escape. my lover and i meet late at night and hide from everyone who will try to hurt us. i want to be with him now but everything else simply wont allow it..

no one else will understand, but i thought you guys might since you seem like very open minded people.

has anyone ever been in a similar situation? what was the outcome? advice?

thanks .. :)

Mon, Feb. 6th, 2006, 12:31 pm

flslurp: Is an affair ever justified?

I know the answer to this should always be "no". The problem is that I have a much greater sex drive than my wife. I am rarely allowed inside her (the last time was, if I remember correctly, before Christmas), and even when I am her attitude is usually one of "get it over with".

I used to believe that my wife would always be my lover too, letting me know that she enjoyed what we did together in bed - or helping me to get better at meeting her needs. Soon after our wedding, I became convinced that was a lie and that the only reason she had ever opened her legs for me was so I would marry her.

Eventually, it was too much. I found someone who, like me, enjoyed sex and didn't get it at home. On several occasions, we met in person. What we did together in those few stolen hours was more exciting than months spent with our spouses.

Sometimes I wish that my wife was open to the idea that it is possible to enjoy the intimate company more than one person. I wish I could be completely honest with her - tell her that I love her vey much, and would never leave her, but that our sex life is just not satisfying enough. I am afraid that, sooner or later, I will once more seek out a play-pal, and that if I do it will destroy my wife.

Well, that's my little rant for the day. If anyone has any comments, I'd love to hear them.

Thu, Dec. 22nd, 2005, 08:52 pm

ana_grant: Slightly Unusual Intro From Wisconsin

Hello. Behind the LJ cut is my "intro" of sorts, which is very long and quite possibly slightly unusual. It isn't particularly racy but there is a bit of language and some adult ideas, so I'm assuming you're 18/21/whatever the devil "adult" is where you're at...before you click.

I would very much appreciate it if you'd read it. It might not seem exactly like what you'd expect to see in this particular community, but it is honest and fairly thorough, which maybe counts for something.

( Much text, no pics. Hopefully interesting.Collapse )

To clarify: I'm not looking to start drama. This isn't a prank. I'm interested in any and all contact from persons who were interested in *any* way by *anything* contained within this post.

X-Posted to some degree. Mods, blast away if this doesn't belong here.

Thanks for your time.

Mon, Dec. 12th, 2005, 01:56 am

freezinglemon: Lost in Translation

I started this thing to vent... only a couple of my deepest darkest secret cone of silence friends will ever read this knowing my identity... but I've got to get this out and maybe some of you around here that I don't know, will relate to this. Here goes....

So there I am ... watching the movie Lost In Translation and it hits me... "Holy fuck, I'm this guy!"
Yep, that's me... married , successful artist, on the road, unhappy in life, miserable but successful wife at home taking care of kids, me needing to find some passion in life, falling in love with a young "wise beyond her years" girl, not "doing" anything with her, having good times and then feeling weird about it, having an (early in my case) mid life crisis... Damn that movie screwed me up! The other guys in my band... two of which are married now call those weird road phone calls from home "Translation calls".

Now, all this has been brewing for a while... my marriage has been in the tank for a couple of years now...I've been dealing with all this stuff (poorly at times) for a couple of years now.
Married young... too young... never sowed the wild oats...had kids... loaded down with responsibility... grew apart... became roommates instead of a couple...hardly ever have sex, (all her I might add)...
I'm still attracted to her a lot but she just doesn't seem to be at all passionate about anything in life .. let alone me...she just goes about her routine and is generally miserable about the whole thing.
We've tried all the stuff... counseling, REALLY focusing on each other but it always seems all the passion and emotion and work comes from me.

My journal is an account of the ongoing affair that has developed in my life. I would love your thoughts help and advice.

Please visit my journal and comment
Freeze

Sun, Oct. 2nd, 2005, 03:27 pm

thefinalchariot: A different kind of cheating.

I have an exam on Thursday, and for the past few years, there have been very few occasions where I haven't listened to my iPod (CD player in earlier times), during class. I never get caught because I put my hair over the earbuds, and the wire under my shirt and put the ipod on my lap or in my pocket. So here's my issue: I have a really big test coming up on Thursday and I'm going to make very concise studying notes, have the notes checked by my professor during his office hours on Tuesday, and then he'll make suggestions on if I need to add anything to those notes to prepare for the exam. I'm going to orally say those notes into my mic on my computer, and make separate MP3's for all of the individual things I need to study for, and then load those MP3's to my iPod.

Does this seem plausible? I used to just type up my notes and put them underneath my test, but I was just WAITING to be caught that way. I think this way seems much better.

Mon, Aug. 29th, 2005, 04:10 pm

sprinkleme77: what a tangled web we all weave.......

what is your advice on asking a married man to leave his wife for you? i mean, i cant bring myself to do it. but... he has already said he would.. but i told him no and to not think about that again. so he seems almost scared to say anything that could make me feel like he would. i honestly believe that he would do it if i gave him the impression i would still be around if he did. has anybody been through anything like this? we've only really been having sex for about a month and im in love with the guy. - i know the difference, because i was with a guy for 4 years and never felt this way about him. this man and i share a lot of passion and i know all i would have to do is give him the word. but he has two kids and it would probably be the most selfish thing in the world for me to ask of him. but, with him not wanting me to see other people.. he's almost ready to make that move just so i dont.

any advice? i mean, im not an idiot.. im just seeking personal experiences here...

not so much what you think i should do. cuz regardless im gonna eventually do what i want anyway.