A collection of my thoughts... (original) (raw)

This past week I began wearing the ring that my first boyfriend bought me, over 5 years ago. It's strange to me that enough time has passed for this piece of sterling silver to lose all its sentimental value. I still remember the day it was given to me. A warm afternoon, an uphill drive, reaching into the glove box, and then tears. I hope that one day I can wear my other ring just the same.

I also realized that somewhere in the last three years, I lost myself. I fell, I picked myself up, got over the break up... and now I'm okay. Though I just don't feel the same. At first I thought it was the physical - my physical fitness, the condition of my skin... but now I know that's not it. I've regained a lot of my confidence, I've put myself out there, I've joined a good share of social networking sites, gone out regularly, and have still found myself for the most part, alone. It's not that I don't mind being single, it's that there just aren't any friends and acquaintances that I can talk to on a regular basis. There aren't people approaching me, inviting me out, wanting me. It isn't like before.

I know I shouldn't expect things to stay the same, especially when I removed myself from that scene for such a long period of time. I'm just going to keep working at it, keep working on me. Hopefully things will work themselves out and I'll find myself at another high.

Feeling: lonely