post-it notes from the state hospital (original) (raw)

it's a new arrangement...

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Hey if you get a chance I highly recommend flunking out of college, going to a now-defunct trade school, sweating in a hotel basement kitchen for 2 years along with countless other kitchens and then applying for a contract job on a whim. Sometimes it gives you the opportunity to attempt a sexy model pose on a snow machine you just drove halfway to a volcano in Antarctica.Which can in turn lead to climbing mountains reflected in perfect, freezing ponds in Alaksa near towns with names like "Hope" and "Moose Pass" and the best mac and cheese you've ever eaten.Both places may contain people whose hearts are so perfectly attuned to yours that you are constantly re-learning your own limitless capacity for platonic love. People who let you sleep on their couch or in their guestrooms in Greenvile and Atlanta and Portland and Denver. People who feed you and tell you they love you, unprovoked.Anyway yeah. Flunking out of college. Scared the shit out of me at the time. Best fucking thing that ever happened to my life.
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I went to San Francisco for a weekend. It was great.2014-03-01 15.59.38I moved. It was less great but it's done now and I like the actual place.I turned 28. It was wonderful. People spoil me more than I deserve.The Mountain Goats are coming to town next month but it already sold out. Keeping my fingers crossed. Or, OR they still have tix available in Austin two days later. I will try to go, is what I'm saying.R is moving to Denver at the end of the week. It's...not great, but probably the best thing for him. So, yeah. Making the most of time now, bracing for future sad feelings.But who can really be sad on this, the First of May?

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Went out for a friend's birthday and comicbookclub this weekend and it was a great time but I'm fucking exhausted now and the grocery store feels daunting.My stomach's been angry lately and I had to give away an $8 Moscow Mule last night bc the lime juice & vodka didn't sit right. That was annoying, but I didn't drink the rest of the night and it really didn't affect the amount of fun I had so I might just start saving money the few times I go out by just getting soda water & tipping.A thing might be happening. I've repeated the vague details I have so many times in the last week I'm almost bored of this really exciting potential thing. I don't want to write it on the internet because it feels like that would jinx it? Technosuperstitious Atheist, I suppose.
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I think this day job is hardest on Sofia, since she doesn't understand weekdays. So five days out of seven she gets fed at 6:30 in the morning and we take an afternoon nap or at least sit quietly for a half hour or so. And then, from her perspective, I just COMPLETELY FORGET OUR ROUTINE for two days. Food sometimes doesn't arrive until 10-noon! I neglect my napping duties! It's the worst!

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An unexpected egg-yolk-yellow bubble mailer was wedged in my mailbox when I got home this afternoon. Tried to think if I'd ordered anything that hadn't come in but nothing came to mind. Recognized notwolf's handwriting when I got out of the car. Bastard sent me some Ascension promo cards, incl the Rat King I've been wanting for a minute, tea, and schmancy peanut butter.Anyways it's always nice to hear from ka-tet, and between that, a mellow workday, and the new space heater at my feet, I'm feeling pretty damn glad to be where I am.

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There's a group of pals really excited to have me cook for them in about half an hour but I'm feeling like a moody cuss. Gonna put on some "up" music, pry myself out of this computer chair, and roam around the flat getting ready/cleaning instead of letting cussedness win.

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I know usually when I say "I got an email from my mom" on here it means I am about to tell y'all about something goofy and/or affectionately passive-aggressive she sent me. But I just got an email from my mom. It was the transcript of a commencement speech Steve Jobs made, with her own header that ended like this:"I no longer believe a college education is the only way to succeed...It can be a prison that limits your choices and steals your time. I’m so glad that you now have a job you enjoy and time in the sunshine to enjoy your life. Love, Mum"Anyway that was the nice thing I cried about today. That and a Superman photoset.
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Ahhh I am an ideal candidate for this job listing and I sent in a cover letter the same day it was posted and my resume is bitchin why haven't I heard ba-ha-haaaaaack.OTOH I just checked the HR website and I have 3 weeks of paid vacation lying around so maybe I'll take a 'oliday. Somewhere I don't have to spend money, preferably.

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I finally did that thing and went to a doctor. Just a GP for now. She gave a quick checkmark test and says yes I probably have a mild anxiety problem. Ordered blood tests from next door to address my low energy.The phlebotomist was top-notch and got my vein with no trouble, but a needle is a needle and I winced a little."I'm sorry!" She said, "I understand, I hate needles." So I told her about the hygienist-in-training who cleaned my teeth a few years ago and was terrified of dentists, how she wanted to help other people be less scared. I guess it's a common theme among medical specialists.Going to my hometown tomorrow to help out. They were hit pretty hard by the tornadoes, specifically a neighborhood made largely of Habitat for Humanity homes. Nowhere near as bad as what's happened in Oklahoma, but it's somewhere I can lend my hands and be useful.One of the servers follows me around talking at me and today he was babbling about all the things happening in such short order this year: Boston, West, these tornadoes. "I mean, do you ever think about it?" Yes, pretty much always.

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