Sparda's Journal (original) (raw)

Ok. As THE LEGEND OF SPARDA seems to be pretty well known in the DMC world, it stands to reason that at some point Hollywood would make a movie of it. And get it totally wrong in a way that would give Trish ammunition to tease Dante with for the rest of his possibly centuries-long life.

However, actors make me wince, so I know no names.

But I want some people the casting of which would be really, really painful.

Eg:
As t3h legendary dark knight!Sparda: I'm thinking that as he's the legendary Dark knight they might cast a black guy to be PC. But Samuel L. Jackson is too cool for this, as it's supposed to be a BAD!blockbuster, the kind you think will flop as it is so innacurate/plotless yet nets a ton of cash anyways. Any suggestions for a pretty-boy who can act 'noble' and 'brainless', or what do you think would be a really bad, but believable for Hollywood, casting choice?

The SACRIFICED PRIESTESS/TRUE LUV for whom/who inspired him to see t3h good in humanity: I see a pretty, idealistic chick who will also be a mouthpiece for environmental and anti-war messages, as we can't forget that. If this were earlier, she would of course be a helpless damsel in distress, but as now we are not as sexist... how can she be non-offensive to feminists yet still have her be offensive to Dante/Trish/etc.?

As Mundus: Who can be cast/portrayed as a megalomanical bad guy without offending anyone and hence losing ticket sales? Bush-esque or traditional red-horny devil?

And of course, any random demons would have the vampiric darkevil hotness, and there would be half-naked succubi for fanservice...

Any suggestions for really cliched B-movie-type plots or things that would be amusingly wrong or incredibly embarrassing to Dante would be greatly appreciated as well.

See my Sparda icon. See the clothes and monocle and respectable! air.

Let's make Hollywood make him wince.