Unfit parents (original) (raw)
July 22 2007, 22:45
As I watch modern children on the slippery downslope to Hell, I often wonder what it is that causes it. Then I go to work at my retail job and take the city bus... and I get the answer. Parents these days are just getting stupider and stupider. These are a few of the parents that really piss me off:
1. The ones that take their BABY in the stroller up the ESCALATOR. We have a damn sign on the escalator saying not to do this! We provide a damn elevator so you have an alternative way to access the second floor of our store! But you do it anyway. Our escalators are old pieces of crap. They have a habit of just STOPPING randomly. I've been on it when this has happened. It's kinda jarring. If your kid gets hurt because you took their stroller on the friggin' escalator, don't come cryin' to the management of the store. You should be shot.
1a. A subtype of group 1. These people take relatives in WHEELCHAIRS on our escalators. This is a bad thing for the reasons detailed before.
2. This is a recently-discovered type of unfit parent. This woman is truly a unique species. She had an INFANT. She was carrying it in a Snugli (one of those mommy harnesses that you can put a baby in). And get this: she was SMOKING!! I don't care how much you turn your head to the side when you exhale your noxious fumes, your baby is still getting some of it (unless, somehow, you could turn your head to face backwards like an owl). But I can only imagine how you must be at home. Heaven help that poor emphysema-ridden child if you ever get a car. You'd probably have all the windows up (or one slightly cracked) in the winter and the vents going (thinking that this is getting the smoke out). As much as I'd hate to see your child grow up without a parent, I'd like to see you get your comeuppance and have Social Services take your beautiful baby out of your undeserving hands.
Watching these children being raised by such obviously stupid parents makes my shoes sad.