Attempting to escape rabid plot bunnies since 1989 (original) (raw)

ACHILLES’ LAST STAND
Dorian: The Major is my utter opposite. That man is extraordinarily stiff.

James: Suppose he becomes TOO stiff and...

Dorian: Stop it, James. There's nothing as ugly as jealousy in a man.

* * *

LOVE IN GREECE
B: I can't see his face well, but I'm positive he's drop dead handsome.

Klaus: Are you gay? Don't get excited because a man came.

* * *

DRAMATIC SPRING
Klaus: You needn't take off your shirt. Just take off your pants. And hurry up.

Dorian: You certainly don't beat around the bush. Are all soldiers like this?

Klaus: Stop dawdling! Hurry up and take them off! Do you want to be force stripped? Hurry up and take them off! NOW!

* * *

IN'SHALLAH
James: You and the Major! You've been secretly seeing each other!

Dorian: What are you talking about?

James: You were in a looooong embrace. (...) There is something between you two.

Dorian: A gun and a knife to be precise.

James: Then you were threatening one another?

Dorian: Yes.

James: You're loving yet threatening at the same time? You're having a sado-masochistic relationship with him! I...I...I... (faints) am suffering from heat stroke.

Dorian: I thought you were just in HEAT.

* * *

HALLELUJAH EXPRESS
Dorian: You had the gall to doggedly repeat "awful" FIVE times.

James: You were counting? Don't spank me! Please...

Dorian: I'm well aware without you persistently telling me. (. . . )

James: You're NOT going to spank me? Shucks.

* * *

Klaus: The ship of fools is back.

* * *

Klaus: Where was this letter?

Z: In my back pocket.

Klaus: I told you not to get caught with your pants down!

Z: Sorry, sir.

Klaus: Cavorting, even at a time like this!

* * *

Klaus: Keep the earl under watch. Don't take your eyes off him for a second! Don't get caught with your pants down! Anybody who screws up gets reamed all the way to Alaska!

* * *

Dorian: Hurry, there's no time.

Klaus: Let's do it.

* * *