Geek/Tech humor (original) (raw)

Thu, Apr. 8th, 2004, 02:16 pm

fungol: Geek/Tech humor

Top 12 Things A Klingon Programmer Would Say

12 Specifications are for the weak and timid!

11 This machine is a piece of GAGH! I need dual Pentium processors if
I am to do battle with this code!

10 You cannot really appreciate Dilbert unless you've read it in the
original Klingon.

9 Indentation?! -- I will show you how to indent when I indent your
skull!

8 What is this talk of 'release'? Klingons do not make software
'releases'. Our software 'escapes' leaving a bloody trail of designers and
quality assurance people in its wake.

7 Klingon function calls do not have 'parameters' -- they have
'arguments' -- and they ALWAYS WIN THEM.

6 Debugging? Klingons do not debug. Our software does not coddle
the weak.

5 We have challenged the entire quality assurance team to a
Bat-Leth contest. They will not concern us again.

4 TRUE Klingon Warrior does not comment his code!

3 Filing this SPR you have challenged the honor of my family.
Prepare to die!

2 You question the worthiness of my code? I should kill you where
you stand!

1 Our users will know fear and cower before our software. Ship it!
Ship it, and let them flee like the dogs they are!