SassKittenFics (original) (raw)

DEAN: Hey Sam I dare you to drink this.
SAM: Why would I drink it?
DEAN: I double-dare you!

MISSOUI: Boy if you put that foot on my table I'll wack you with a spoon!
DEAN: I didn't do anything!
MISSOUI: Yeah! But you were thinkin' it!

DEAN: See that attitude right there! That is why I always got the extra cookie.

DEAN: I hope your apple-pie is freakin worth it.

DEAN: Your not gonna try and kill me, are you?
SAM: No.
DEAN: Good. Coz then that would just be knida awkward.

DEAN: Dude, you fugly

SAM: So burning the body didn't do anything?
DEAN: sure it did, now it's pissed

DEAN: Oh, you are a handsome devil, but I don't swing that way.

COP: Is there anything about you that's real?
DEAN: My boobs.

DEAN: Demons I get. People are crazy.

DEAN: Oh sweetheart, I don't do shorts.

DEAN: Dude, I full-on Swayze'd that mother.

SAM: I stole a car.
DEAN: That's my boy.

DEAN: Hold me, Sam. That was beautiful.

DEAN: I thought the legend said that this Mordecai only goes after chicks?
SAM: It does
DEAN: Well, that explains why it went after you, but why me?
SAM: Hilarious

DEAN: So, what'd you dream about?
SAM: Lollipops and candy canes.
DEAN: Yeah, sure.

SAM: Why'd you let me fall asleep?
DEAN: Because I'm an awesome brother.

DEAN: So you believe her?
SAM: I do.
DEAN: Yeah, I think she's hot, too.

DEAN: First I want to find that handsome devil and kick the holy crap out of him!

SAM: That was your great idea? To burn the house down?
DEAN: People won't go in anymore.

DEAN: How could it get any worse? Some alien made you his bitch!

SAM: My daddy shot your daddy in the head.

DEAN: Dude, you, like, full on had a girl inside you for a full week. That's pretty naughty.

DEAN: Of course, the most troubling question is, why do these people assume we're gay.
SAM: Well you are kind of butch – they probably think you're overcompensating.

SAM: What are you going to do, poke her with a stick? Dude, you're not going to poke her with a stick!

DEAN: Come on, man. I know Sam, better than anyone. He's got more of a conscience than I do. I mean, the guy feels guilty surfing the Internet for porn!

DEAN: Nobody is shooting my brother.
DUANE: It's not going to be your brother much longer, you said it yourself!
DEAN: Nobody's shooting anyone!
DUANE: You were going to shoot me!
DEAN: You don't shut your piehole, I still might!

DEAN: I usually like to be warned before I'm violated with demon tongue.

SAM: So I'm a freak now?
DEAN: You've always been a freak.

DEAN: I hear you, ok? I'm being an ass. I'm sorry. But right now we've got a freaking zombie running around and we've got to figure out how to kill it.
SAM: Our lives are weird, man.

DEAN: Your girlfriend is past her expiration date and we're crazy?

SAM: Give you a couple of severed heads and a pile of dead cows and you're Mr. Sunshine…

DEAN: I know what you're thinking: Why did it have to be clowns!
SAM: At least I'm not afraid of flying.
DEAN: Planes crash!
SAM: And apparently clowns kill.