How can I sleep (original) (raw)

Friends ONLY [Jun. 3rd, 2019|11:54 am]The Devil's handmaiden
This journal is FRIENDS ONLYExisting fic will remain unlockednew fic will be posted to dejuramortisif you wish to join my friends list you will be given a quick once over to make sure you're not a russian spam botremoval will be entirely at my discretionto make life easier for people just wanting fic i have set up an Archive of our own account hereI've made a multifandom master list of fic herehttp://seraphim-grace.livejournal.com/660080.htmlif you do not want to join the flist but want to read the fic and it's locked, let me know and I'll unlock it for you
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Fic: The Devil's Trill (M) [Dec. 28th, 2013|09:54 am]The Devil's handmaiden
[Tags**|big bang, fic, teen wolf] [Current Mood** artisticartistic] [Current Music NCIS in the background]Title: The Devil's TrillAuthor: seraphim_graceArtist: reiya_wakaymaPairing: Scott McCall/Allison ArgentRating: MWord Count: 27500 Disclaimer: Teen Wolf is owned by Jeff Davis, and other associated parties. I do not make any profit from this story and the plot is purely fiction.Warnings: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Supernatural Detective Agency, Features one scene of dubious consent, discussion of a past non consensual scene, violence, demon possession, demon deals, transformations, classical music, innuendos and potty mouths, discussion of death, suicide, attempted suicidethis is not a death fic, and features no character death - some characters are just dead before the story starts! Not that it stops them much. Mentions of past cross dressing. Underage drinking.However the fic is not nearly as dark as the warnings suggest. Rated for violence.Summary:Scott thought his life had changed for the better when he was accepted to the Argent Music Academy, he had just received a new cornea and everything looked wonderful, but then he started to dream of a woman playing the violin, playing “The Devil's Trill” and found himself caught up in a investigation of demons, the living dead, and music.Link to fic: here Link to artist masterpost: here
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(no subject) [May. 27th, 2013|04:12 am]The Devil's handmaiden
I've been quiet here because I've been mostly procrastinating on tumblrbut I just got a lovely ask from a girl who was surprised about my fic because she read a lot of them in one go but everyone assured her I was a terrible badfic writer and that I have that reputation, but she found that "everyone was wrong"I've had encounters before where I've been accused of this, when asked to help another writer with something a fan of the story she wanted help with came out of the word-work to warn her that I was a notorious badficcer, to which she replied actually I've read her work she's very good.the fan then came back to me a few days later and apologised.So I'm wondering wth is going on?I've seen it in regards to "Immortal Beloved" which is Godstiel and people have said oh I didn't read that she's a terrible badficcerbut I'm wondering if that word doesn't mean what I think it means.Like Chartreuse sounds like it should be a reddish shade of purple but is actually vomit green.I've been told I write fics which are bad in the sense that they rip out your heart and stomp on it kinda way, but that's a different thing altogether.And so I'm left wondering a) wth, surely you lot would tell me, right, and b) if that reputation for taking risks and writing darkfic has gotten muddled with badficbut the other thing is that this reputation seems to have started about the time I published "Rivers of Babylon" in which Sam is dead. In Immortal Beloved Sam is mostly absent. In World Enough and Time Sam is corrupted.I'm wondering if these two things are connected, that in writing primarily Dean fics which explore loss and fear - especially in regards to his brother, and then finally writing Sam centric and making him a villain-ish, that I've gone and poked the samgirls again.Every other fandom I play in I get well recieved (probably because I can spell) Supernatural treats me like some sort of pariah. I'm just thinking that perhaps someone is spreading shit behind my back.Oh well, considering how many comments I get on here and ao3 telling me how surprise that they were that the fics I had written were not badfic and that I was actually very good, I think I might be winning that row too.
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tumblr [May. 4th, 2013|05:31 pm]The Devil's handmaiden
I have a tumblr here but it's quite random but I can't get over the amount of wankseriously, they have a different wank thing every day and the vast majority of them are brain breakingI'm not even following that many blogs!wank topics this week that I noticedWhether or not casting Benedict Cumberbatch counted as race fail just in case he was Khan, despite the fact that Khan was custom made in a bottle and could have been bright blue (like an andorian)cliched characterisation - this involved name calling, I swearthere was practically pistols at dawn over the correct use of an apostropheHow Sterek was illegal and pedophilia because Stiles was 16 (actually I think he's 17 in canon now)how being mean to Scott in Teen Wolf was racist, especially the scene where Stiles gives Scott water in a dog bowl - but yet when Scott does worse things it doesn't countand the thing is that the wank trolls are often so blatantly wank trolls, they're stubborn not listening and when they get stuck they start name calling accusing people of ableism (I still don't know what that is) or being racists, pedophiles, nazisand when they are blatantly out argued they result to reaction gifs and it becomes apparent that they are not listening and they all have very similar user names and I wouldn't be surprised if they were just sock puppet accountsbut you know me, I can't bear people saying stupid things so I poke the trolls, I can't help it. And the funny thing is rather than have people not follow my blog, it goes the other way around, I got a kudos on the blog for being patient and trying to explain stuff.but seriously, I never used to get caught up in the trolling, now I am right in the thick of it, and although I want to go around going YOU ARE ALL SO STUPID I think I like it - why else would I keep poking them
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Today's Recipe - Anxiety reducing low carb chocolate. [Apr. 30th, 2013|05:20 pm]The Devil's handmaiden
[**Tags**|anxiety chocolate., recipes]Yes, you read that right, it's the holy grail of recipes and to make matters better - it's so easy a child could make it (with adult supervision that they don't burn themselves)and it makes a wonderfully expensive looking gift!You will need!1 large bar of 75% cocoa dark chocolate (I rec Green and Black's for this) buy the best you can find, it makes all the difference believe me. It's best not to just skimp and get cooking chocolate for this.1 tsp of lavender flowers1 bottle rose essential oil1 bottle lavender essential oil1 ice trayto maketake one pot of boiling water and place a bowl resting over it, so the bottom of the bowl is heated by the water - or a bain marie if you've got one.melt the chocolate in the bain marie stirring constantly. 75% chocolate is very low sugar and we won't be adding any more, and none of it is processed so if like me you're on a low carb plan it's perfect, it comes in at something like 10g per 100g which is well below the GI tolerance of 40.add the lavender flowers (dried is okay if it's all you can find) stirring continuallyAdd 5 drops of lavender oil and 10 drops of rose oilstir thoroughlyif you have left over flowers sprinkle them into the bottom of the ice tray, this will impress them on the top of the chocolates.pour the chocolate into the ice tray as evenly as you can. This is a bit of a trick because the bowl is hot, so be careful not to burn yourself.bring down to room temp and then stick in the fridge. Once they are completely set you can stick them in the freezer to keep sticky mitts off them.Turn out of the ice tray for pieces which are two bite sized, the combination of the lavender, rose and chocolate is very relaxing and no one needs to know just how easy they are to make, and so put in little boxes they make a wonderful (cheap) gift of connoisseur chocolates. They will make you appear like an awesome hostess if you put them out on a tray and cost so much less than fairy cakes to make. And well, when someone says you can't eat that it's mostly sugar you can be secure in the knowledge that actually it's not, it's very healthy and tastes great too.
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The Evil Dead (or how to kill a remake at a hundred paces) [Apr. 28th, 2013|02:31 am]The Devil's handmaiden
[Tags**|film review., the evil dead]Long term readers of mine will know I am a HUGE evil dead fan, I am a deadite's deadite.I wrote articles about it when I was at uni and the first one was still banned in the uk and got my copy free from fangoria after working exclusively with the script to write said articles.so huge deadite - so the remake filled me with equal parts glee and terrorNow let's be frank I went in biassed as hell! The only way it could win was to present the mythology in such a way that it was new and probably terrifying without harking back to many times to the original and possibly - nah sod it, it was screwed, The Evil Dead 2 was a remake of the Evil Dead[Unknown LJ tag]**Five GROWN UPS (in their mid to late twenties) show up at the cabin because one of them Mia is having an intervention, she's a heroin user who has od'ed and they've shown up - with dog - to support herbut you realise very quickly that their names, Dave, Eric, Mia, Olivia, Nat spell out Demonas mia complains of a smell the dog finds the fruit cellar and evidence of a black magic ritual featuring a book. This book is the usual necronomicon but apparently they couldn't call it that for legal reasons - this surprises me because the lovecraft mythos was so unprotected for so long - and the word is actually plausible in the greek - but yeah, I think it was just too big, too many letters, so it's name was given in Spanish - book of the dead.However instead of a book written by a Kandarian sorceror in the magics that destroyed their kingdom when they summoned demons to give them power the book is written in some sort of unknown script and someone has helpfully scribbled all over it with a red biro. It has illustrations, some of which look uncannily like the posters from the original movie - notably the one Eric calls the Abomination (it is literally the body pulling itself out of the grave with the hand raised)anyway after Eric pieces together the missing page - the one labelled do not read this aloud - and reads it aloud the demon Kanda appears. Seriously, they called it Kanda. This meant every time they named it I saw a certain sword bearing exorcist, but that was just me. Mia is in the woods trying to walk to town because she wants to go home and they're all - no you shall not go - the demon gets loose and forces her car into a tree (in a nice heads up to the original 1963 haunting, a shot for shot repeat in fact) and into the swamp, where it initiates the infamous "vine rape"except it's more like a couple of leeches and some reeds. If you've never seen or heard of the evil dead you would certainly enjoy this film because that's where it falls down - where it copies the original.As Mia is infected she spreads the infection and we see famous scenes reimagined, the blood flood - where instead of the walls seeping blood Mia vomits onto one of the characters floods of blood thus infecting her, the farewell to arms scene is re-enacted with an electrical carving knife and these scenes don't quite workinstead of using the white sclera lense for the deadites they used exorcist style yellow with red rim lenses which looked a bit crappy really. And so much time is spent building up the oh look there is a demon on the loose that the meat has no personality. In fact I didn't notice there actually WAS a dog until they found it dead.And conveniently Eric always manages to find the page showing what the demon is going to do just before it does it - how convenient.another thing that bothered me is some of the most terrifying moments in the original evil dead are really subtle - this film had the subtlety of a chain saw. The woman in the cellar singing for example is not intended to be scary, but instead tender. and the iconic "demon" lines, dead by dawn and I'll swallow your soul are mangled into you'll never see morning alive, he'll kill you all by morning etc and I'll feast on your stinking soul. But those simple chants were powerful, they were used as lietmotifs, the deadites chanting them to break morale. i assumed it was because the director was spanish and that's how they appeared as subtitles when he watched it.And the most powerful trick the evil dead pulled was by breaking convention - it was a boy that escaped, through all of it the girls were the first to succumb and the boy escaped. This doesn't manage that.Scenes felt stilted and jammed in, you could understand the farewell to arms scene, but the other two felt shoehorned in like - we're making an evil dead film we need to have the vine rape and the blood flood. The tension was unrelenting giving us no time to breathe between horror and horror which just desensitised you to it, even when it was frankly very gross it was meh because it never stopped. The pacing was a mess. The acting was replaced with gruesome flesh effects and lumbering, and the bits in the originals that were truly disturbing were skipped out because they weren't gory.I might have enjoyed this film more if I didnt know the original at all, I knew I was going to have problems with it, but the problems I had was that it wasn't so much a bad remake, as a film made in honour of that didn't quite understand what it was honouring. It took a film that had originally broken conventions and forced it back into them.It ended up being as formulaic as the Cabin in the Woods.And I'm keeping mum on the chainsaw.
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(no subject) [Mar. 30th, 2013|12:35 am]The Devil's handmaiden
[**Tags**|idiots, plagiarism]there's a funny thing about my fanfic, and I'll explain why in a moment, but I am a "writer's" writer, which means the people whose fic you're reading have probably read my work, but the ground level fangirl has never heard of methis delights me because of reasons, but it's because of my "innovation" and experimentation. I try things, sometimes it works, sometimes not, but my fics aren't like any others, which is fine, whateverbut it has a backlash, which is actually usually hilarious, and it came up todayMy fic something there is in beauty came under fire today, not on ao3 where i linked it because some acts deserve to be shieldedthe story is one of an angel, Castiel, asked to watch over the reincarnation of the Angel Michael as he is punished for casting Lucifer out/not killing himit's not a new piece, it was first published in december 2009but today a spn fangirl emailed me through lj about how I had plagiarised another story, a wincest one. About twenty minutes later I got a second email apologising for the first from the original author of the story in question, which was about a month old. She was very patient and explained that she had recieved an email from the fangirl in question and had at first thought that SHE was the one being accused of plagiarism because she had explored a similar idea, in fact, she had taken the idea from a note I had put on the comments, that Sam was Lucifer who had killed the first guardian.She had read my story, liked it, and it gave her an idea, but her work was different enough, it didn't deal with the reincarnation aspect at all, that she didn't think to say based on an idea by which wouldn't bother me anyway. However the fangirl in question had found Beauty and didn't check any of the date stamps or anything and launched into a rather nasty attack and saying that if I didn't take the story down she would tell Ao3 I was a plagiarist because she knew there was nothing she could do about LJthe amusing thing is that this happens at least once every six months or so, usually with the other author apologising and either admitting they'd never heard of my work before the accusation was made, checked the date stamps went hey, you were first, btw i read your fic it was awesome, or I wouldn't have thought of doing that, sorry about my readers. The funny thing is I don't particularly mind, well I could do without the threats and name calling, and someone taking the time to actually look at date stamps or who left comments because sometimes it was the other author asking if they could play with the idea, but it does make me worry, and the really hilarious thing - the one that baffles the hell out of me - is that it's invariably that the idea has been turned into wincest and the great sin I have committed is not that I have "stolen" their idea or their story, but instead that I have made it "destiel"sweetie, if I wanted to offend you, I'd do a whole lot more than just changing the pairing in your story. and people wonder why I poke the sam girls. usually my response is thank you very much for bringing this to my attention, I will be in contact with the original author in regards to your accusation of their plagiarism as their story is X months younger than the one which I published. I'll make sure to keep you updated.99 times out a hundred I'm never going to take it anywhere because it's not worth the fuss and bother arguing it down over one scene (which is usually all it is) but I do like to make their heads explode.Plagiarism is a terrible thing, and perhaps people should learn what it is before making accusations, or at least take the time to discover which fic came first and was the one "plagiarised" and no, honey, two stories dealing with reincarnation does not mean one was stolen.edit: I should tell you about the funniest oneIn Immortal Beloved there is a scene where Dean gets in the car, turns on the radio and it plays Simon and Garfunkle's The Boxer - I was accused of stealing that bit of poetry from a wincest story. Apparently she had had Dean recite it or something and the poor reader thought it was original poetry - despite the footnotes explaining it wasn't) and that I had nicked it, I had, but not from her, instead from my father's record collection.I told you, it's the stupidity of it that bothers me, not the accusations. I've been accused of plagiarism and been plagiarised, this is just stupidity.
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Project Runway [Mar. 27th, 2013|04:06 am]The Devil's handmaiden
I hate this seasonI hate the team thing, it means I have no idea what peoples aesthetic is and all it does is make everyone look really bitchyI know it's editted like that to build tension but it just translates as we are all bitchesI normally notice the winner (or in some cases fan winner not show winner) by about ep 2 and I'm pretty accurate although Gretchen did sneak by meand I think it's going to be Michelle but no promises there, but here's the thing, I can't stand Layananow normally this would be I don't like her aesthetic or she's being shown (like Ven was) in an unfavourable light and I don't like it, but no, I've come to the conclusion that even when the show is trying to show her as nice she's coming off as two faced and if there is one thing in this universe i can't stand it's two faced manipulative bitchesyou know me, I wear my feminism proudly and she is the sort of woman who gives women a bad name because she is pretty and she knows it so she plays pretty and dumb and whines her way into getting her own way and then throws everyone else under the bus when she gets it wrong. There is nothing wrong with a woman being strong enough to get her own way or even a woman who uses her femininity as a weapon, but a woman who is manipulative, sly and backhanded - grrrrrrthe other girls on the show are strong enough to turn around and say this is my opinion, but she's all, I like your opinion but i think it would be prettier if it was mine, and if it was mine we'd win, you know that, a big strong man like you you're bullying me by not letting me have my own way, look I am so pretty and doe eyed and I don't speak english well when it looks like i might have to take culpability.I knew so many girls like this, I know so many women like this, and I hate it. Be who you are all the time, admit your mistakes and your opinions, if that's wearing flouncy pink dresses or hob nail boots do it- hell wear them together, but don't say one thing to someone's face and something else behind their back - that's bad karma that collects and you won't like it when it blows up in your face.so yes, she bugs meand her clothes are ugly
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