Repentance of a Peacock (original) (raw)

Repentance of a Peacock is the 41st Episode of Season 3A of the SpongeBob and Friends Adventures Chronicles series. Lord Shen, after all the trouble that was arising over the past few months, thought he finally had the opportunity to rest. However, Po asked him to the meeting room. Despite thinking it was another accident involving Po, to his horror, it was to meet with Po's father, Li Shan, who was surprisingly not full of rage to meet Shen again. He went into hiding like he did in An All-Out French Experience with Gary, but Kairi was able to reason him out of being afraid of someone he most wronged, and despite a long apology, Li Shan surprisingly accepted it unconditionally, already hearing the prophecy of him finding peace thanks to the heart of a young princess. Though Shan did warn that the Pandas were still cautious ever since he attacked the village and are still afraid of him simply for being the same peacock who chased them away of their original home either through Mang or another force, or another situation like The Dark Side of Lord Shen. Shifu suggests that Lord Shen must go on a mission of repentence and establish a more benevolent image with the Panda Village. Despite being fearful of what the pandas would do, Shen accepted, and went with Po, the Furious Five, Boss Wolf who is just as guilty for assisting, Icky, Iago, Fidget, and Cynder because of her knowledge of what Shen is going through. The welcome was going well at first despite signs of fear and skepticism, but it got worse when he encounters the biggest victim of the attack named Shi-Te. Shi-Te, Shan's otherwise honorable advisor, hated Shen with a passion because ever since most of his family was murdered by him, he has grown to be an insulting jerk who will not be easy to accept. Through Shan's advice, Shi decides to give Shen a chance to redeem himself, and warns that he and his comrades, including Po, will be banished forever if he fails. Po and the others then proceed to help Shen prove Shi-Te wrong by teaching him the power of Chi and to better understand the panda way of life. But the issue of the matter proves that dealing with a skeptic is the least of their concerns because a vengeful former follower of the peacocks has reemerged. A female wolf, and Boss Wolf's sister, Dai Shi, was the only one who was disgusted of herself on what her fellow wolves have done to the original village, abandoning the wolf forces and grew bitter and angry in shame and regret of what she did. She has since managed to befriend the queen of a large colony of army ants named Ta Cha Ant, a Hercules beetle named Pan Zing who is a master of a destructive Chi technique that can destroy entire mountains, and a falcon named Xao Su Ting who's an extreme loyalist to Dai Shi, followed by the falcon's hawk bodyguards. Already imposing as it is, Dai Shi is also very resourceful possesses a unique and long-lost weapon called the Weapon of Morph Wao, a seemingly-harmless-enough spear that can transform into any weapon imaginable. She has long set her sights on several things including the conquest of Gongmen City, the annexing of the Valley of Peace, and finally to force Po to teach her the powers of Chi so she can use it to punish the Villain League for turning her brother and Lord Shen into monsters by basically going Kai on them and turning them into little jade tablets, and will only keep them permanently as trophies and never let them out as Jade zombies. The capture of every Kung Fu Master is purely for the sake of blackmailing Po into doing it, or she will be forced to teach herself and use the masters as practice dummies on her independent attempts to learn the secrets of Chi. Can Lord Shen, the others and the Panda Village be able to save Po from being forced to make a decision that disfavors not just DreamWorks China, but all of the UUniverses? And can the other Lodgers come to the rescue in time to help defeat the army ant armada?

Transcript[]

Chapter 1: Lord Shen's Surprise/A Chance of Redemption[]

Lord Shen's Room

Boss Wolf: Good news, sir. Sir Hiss is finally finished with being de-stinkified from the Valentine's Day mess.
Lord Shen: Good. Glad to hear of it. Now Sir Hiss is perfect for any mission, especially our eventual ambassador trip to Zootopia. We want to make a good impression for a world that never realized that it was not alone in the UUniverses.
Boss Wolf:... I'm curious, sir. Have you ever wondered about Shifu's claims about Zootopia housing some kind of... Universal messiah?
Lord Shen: Not just any universal messiah, Boss Wolf. My parents told me stories of the one they were talking about. It is something that would make even Kairi look like an average school girl.
Boss Wolf: Well, considering she's an anime character, you're not way off. (Laughs until an annoyed Shen brought his blade).... No intentional offense, sir.
Lord Shen: (Annoyed)...AS I was saying. (Normally) The only thing more pure than the Princesses of Heart.... is.... The Uniter Princess of All Hearts.

Stylized Drawing Story

(Lord Shen): The legend says that one day, a special someone who's the most kind, the most thoughtful, and the most caring, would be chosen by the Queen of the Lightflies to bare a special gift... A jewel-encrusted item that will be able to turn into a Keyblade... a Keyblade greater than even the infamous X-Blade. This was called in lore to be the Uniter Blade. (A silhouetted figure held the Uniter Blade and fought off several dark figures with it) With it in her arms, the Uniter Princess shall use this fabled blade to bring all of the UUniverses and beyond into an age of unified peace. A peace free of all things that has been known to generate and create darkness. A universe of love, compassion, understanding, and benevolence. (The UUniverses in the background was seen becoming beautiful) However, there is an important warning. Until her true potential is made absolute and only if the Unifier fails to embrace her destiny, she will easily fall victim of being corrupted by the darkness, and either become another villain... or worse. (A failed Uniter Princess was seen screaming as she slowly gets swallowed by shadows)

Present

Lord Shen: (Sighs)... Boss Wolf, this has been a serious issue for eons, because there had been similar attempts to make a new Uniter Princess. All have failed. The poor women ended up either misguidedly corrupted, or fell victim to an irreversible tragedy.
Boss Wolf:... How.... do you know about this, sir?
Lord Shen: Well, you see, before I got to know Celestia... I had feelings for another back in Gongmen when I was a teenager. One that was yet another failed Uniter Princess. Her name... was Shu Mulan.

Flashback

(Lord Shen): (A beautiful Chinese cat was seen, displaying and moving around the Uniter Keyblade masterfully) Shu was the most beautiful feline, as well as the most gracious and kind, in all of China, and perhaps, all of history. (A teenage Lord Shen stared in awe, then ends up clumsily slamming face-first onto her stage)... Even when you interrupt her preformance. (Shu welcomingly helped Shen up) Meeting her during that performance... was almost like a fairy tale. (Shu and Shen were seen spending time together) Unfortunately... It was not meant to be. (Gongmen was seen being attacked by a dark force) The Lightflies troubled darkness-worshipping enemies, The Mothrons, had discovered her potential to be a Uniter Princess, and sought out the Uniter Keyblade to turn it into a new X-Blade to enslave all into united darkness. (An army of dark-themed moths were seen wreaking havoc on Gongmen as a giant very dark and almost-demonic moth leader was seen) The leader and emperor of the corrupted race, wanted to have the Uniter Keyblade to himself. But the Keyblade could never be touched by the dark hands of those who are not pure without the risk of getting burn for even a small finger touch. Yet the monster had a way to cheat his way through it. By absorbing the Heart of the Uniter Princess, he would make himself immune to the Keyblade's defenses, so as long as it doesn't have a current claimer, he was free to use it to his whims. He tried to absorb Shu's heart...but she ended up making the ultimate sacrifice to spare Gongmen of his wrath. (Shu stabbed herself with the Keyblade and sent it to the Lightside of Kingdom Hearts)
Shu: Now... this blade will once again... avoid your grasp. (She vanished as the Mothron Emperor screams in dark agony as she vanishes, as the Lightfly Queen, in the form of a light-themed butterfly, grabs the Keyblade, changing it back into a circle jewel tablet, and escapes into the sky as the Mothrons follow)...
(Lord Shen): I was broken badly for the loss of the only one who showed me kindness since Kairi. (A crying younger Shen was seen, holding onto a painting of him and Shu, as tears become present onto it)

Present

Lord Shen: (The same painting was seen as Lord Shen was still heart-broken by the event)... Oh, Shu... Wherever you are, I hope you're in a better place.
Boss Wolf: .... Is.... Is this why you're so protective about Kairi and Princess Celestia outside of Mang taking you away from them, sir?
Lord Shen: Yes. That incident with Mang just reminded me too well of Shu. I didn't want to lose Kairi just like I lost her. But the Mothrons had been a serious problem for the Lightflies since the dawn of time. They were both of the same origin as the light and dark powers that started the Keyblade Wars. They were destined to be something just as strong as the Keyblade Masters, and legend has it that the creation of the Uniter Blade was so strong, it caused everyone in the UUniverses feel butterfly in their stomachs. That's why I hope that, if this rumor is true, that whoever this new princess is, can't end up like Shu. And it's not just the Mothrons she needs protection from. The Uniter's power is likely too tempting for many villains, including our enemies. We can't let this new one be another failure.
Boss Wolf: I'm with ya' there on that one, sir. Whoever this lady is, I bet she's going to be a cutie... Or even a wolf. I haven't had experience with love since Luna was sexually harassing me!
Lord Shen: (Punches him in the nose) HOW DARE YOU TALK ABOUT CELESTIA'S SISTER LIKE THAT?!? She may be confused with love, but it is not wise to talk about her like that.
Boss Wolf: Ow! You almost broke my nose, sir! Remember that a canine's nose is EXTREMELY sensitive!
Lord Shen: Good, that'll teach you to respect Celestia's family so you don't make both of us look bad.
Intercom: Attention please! Would Lord Shen please report to the briefing room. Po has requested an intervention with you.
Lord Shen:... Oh boy. Is the Panda still recovering from when he discovered that his mother is indeed dead from the 3rd film?
Boss Wolf: I'm sure it's nothing, sir. I bet it's just one of his little accidents again.
Lord Shen: I'm sure it is. That Panda is always prone to make another mess. I'll go see what it is THIS time. I mean, it's not like I'll be completely intimidated by something different or anything.

Later...

Lord Shen: (Hiding in his room as he cawed in fear) I AM COMPLETELY INTIMIDATED!!!
Boss Wolf: ... Oh, wolf! Boss, what happened?
Lord Shen: THE PANDA WANTS ME TO... TO... TO-TO-TO-TO-TO-TO-TO-TO-
Boss Wolf: SPIT IT OUT, SIR, WHAT IS IT?!?
Lord Shen:... TO MEET HIS FATHER!!! (A glass-shatter and an intimidating music verse was heard as Boss Wolf was surprised)
Boss Wolf:... Seriously, sir? You're afraid to meet the panda's dad?
Lord Shen: Wolf, do you not remember that I ATTACKED HIS OLD VILLAGE IN AN ATTEMPTED GENOCIDE OF PANDAS JUST TO CHANGE AN UNSTOPPABLE FUTURE?!?
Boss Wolf: So? Is that a good reason to lock yourself in your room and suck your thumb...or your thumb feather, or whatever?
Lord Shen: HAVE YOU ALSO FORGOTTEN THAT OUR ATTACK HAS ALSO CLAIMED PO'S MOTHER, THAT PANDA'S WIFE!?
Boss Wolf: Well, technically, we were all under dark magic, so, it was Mang's fault. He corrupted you, remember?
Lord Shen: TRY EXPLAINING THAT TO HIM!! THAT IS IF HE DOESN'T DECIDE TO SMACK OUT YOUR OTHER EYE AS WELL!
Boss Wolf: Look, if he was here to hurt any of us badly, Po wouldn't've invited him here.
Lord Shen: I'M NOT COMING OUT!!
Boss Wolf:... Oh, double wolf!

Later, in the Main Hall

Boss Wolf: And that's what happened. Shen's seriously freaked out about meeting Po's dad again.
Mantis: Well, no s*** considering what he did to their old village. I'm surprised you're not freaking out about this, too.
Boss Wolf: Well, it's mainly because I was trained to not be easily intimidated. Shen taught me better than that. But it is ironic since he's now being a long-necked long-tailed chicken about it.
???: I HEARD THAT, BOSS WOLF!!!
Boss Wolf: WELL YOU ARE!!!
Lord Shen:...IF YOU THINK I'LL COME OUT THERE TO KICK YOUR ASS FOR THAT, THEN FORGET IT!!
Boss Wolf:...Worth a shot.
Spyro: Can you really blame him? Mang tainted him into something monstrous.
Sparx: The guy basically caused him to go Holocaust on that panda village.
Mantis: Sparx, what did we say about referencing real-life events?
Sparx:...To not to. But hell, we did it before, haven't we?
Mantis: Yeah, but I'm just telling you to be careful.
Thundera: So...how do we get the cowardly peacock to come out of his crib and face his past with the pandas?
Kairi: I think I can do it. He'll definitely listen to me. He had this coming since the trailer for the third movie came out.
Boss Wolf: She's not wrong.
Kairi:...Alright, I'll be right back. (She left)
Skipper:...So Po? When is your daddy coming here?
Po: In 30 minutes. The High Council is escorting him to the Dragon Temple where he can patch things up with Shen. Let's just hope that he isn't TOO cross with him.

Shen's Room

Lord Shen:... (Knocks were heard on his door) Go away!
Kairi: It's me, Uncle Shen!
Lord Shen:... Oh my f****** God, they had to send her. (Sighs, and unlocks the door to let Kairi inside)
Kairi: They told me everything. Why are you so afraid to meet Po's biological father? You knew this was coming.
Lord Shen: Yes, but I thought it would take time. I'm not fully prepared to face the panda's father! I bet that old panda's going to be unbelievably pissed at what I did to his wife and his home. Hell, what if his new village hates me?
Kairi: I'm sure you're exaggerating!
Lord Shen: OH?!? Remember when Cynder had taken harshness from Atlantis and Atlantica when she did terrible things to them?
Kairi: And you're afraid of that because of what Cynder went through?
Lord Shen: EXACTLY!! The Human King of Atlantis had her thrown in jail while Trident wanted to straight-up banish her from the world! I wager I would be just as unpopular with the pandas!
Kairi: But you know Cynder has redeemed herself in both of those places by saving them from the League.
Lord Shen: Well, I doubt the League cares about some panda village, so I can't expect them to become a problem.
Kairi: You don't necessarily need to save them from a threat to prove you've changed. You could just as easily show them kindness.
Lord Shen: That won't change too greatly. Even if they do understand that the Shen that attacked their village is no more, they'll still be afraid of me because they don't know when I'll end up corrupted again. Even I'm not 100% sure how gone my corruption is, especially after that Dark Shen fiasco! I was even afraid to look at myself in the mirror for days since that time.
Kairi: Uncle Shen, you're not going to feel better if you don't get this out of your chest. If you're going to get over all that's left of your past, you need to make it up to the pandas that you terrorized.
Lord Shen: I don't care what you say, I'm not leaving this damn room!
Kairi:... Not even if I said that Li Shan is coming here in 27 minutes?
Lord Shen: (A suspenseful music verse played as Shen was shocked)... (He screams like a girl) HE'S GONNA RIP ALL MY TAIL FEATHERS OFF!!!
Kairi:... (Scoffs) I wish you hadn't reacted like that. But in all seriousness, Li Shan told us that he doesn't blame you that much. He's already heard of the prophecy where you reformed thanks to my kind heart. So he wants to come and see if you really had changed for the better. You need to confront this. I mean, it's like Rafiki said, you can either run from your past or learn from it. Do you wanna be like Simba running away from your problems instead of facing them?
Lord Shen: No, of course not! Besides, that was just him in a phase of guilt, so you can't blame the guy for thinking he caused his father's death when it was his asshole of an uncle who tricked him into being like that.
Kairi: So...?
Lord Shen:... (Sighs)... I don't know if I should. It sounds like a risky move.
Kairi: Uncle Shen, can you do this for me, please?
Lord Shen:... I... (Sighs) Alright, fine! But if I end up getting in a doozy, then I'm not going to take it easy on you or the Lodgers.
Kairi: Oh, you'll be fine. This is a pure-hearted truth.
Lord Shen:... (Sighs, mans up, and goes out of his room)

Main Hall again, 27 minutes later.

Po: (The Lodgers were seen crowded around a familiar figure as he was seen eating a lot of dumplings) OH-HO-HO, YEAH! Now you guys know where I got my eating skills from!
Tigress: WOW! He totally beat your record!
Sandy: DAD GUM!!! I THOUGHT THAT WAS PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE, EVEN FOR PO!!!
Sparx: Now this guy could beat even the greatest hot-dog-eating champion!
Lord Shen: (Came out with Kairi)...Is that...(The figure appears as Li Shan as the Lodgers cheered of his accomplishment)...GOOD LORD, I THOUGHT THAT WAS PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE, EVEN FOR THE PANDA!!!
Li Shan: Hmm? (Notices Shen)
Lord Shen: Oh, s***! (Runs off, until Kairi drags him back)
Kairi: Oh, come on, Uncle Shen, don't chicken out on this now, no offense!
Lord Shen: (He was staring at Li Shan as everything was silent for a while)
Li Shan:...So...you must be the one who attacked my village, Lord Shen.
Lord Shen: OH, GOD, PLEASE, WHATEVER I DID TO YOUR FAMILY, DON'T SNAP MY NECK!!! I SWEAR THAT WAS MANG COBRA-
Li Shan: (Slaps him across the face) GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF, SHEN! I DO NOT BLAME YOU!!
Lord Shen:...Yeah, that's right. By the look you gave me, I thought I was going to be chicken-fried peacock for a second.
Kairi: Uncle Shen, do you have something to say to Li Shan?
Lord Shen:...(Sighs)...Whatever I did to your family and community, it wasn't my fault. Lord Cobra tempted me into seeing darker power in the fireworks my ancestors created. He wanted me as a scapegoat. And since I overheard that a warrior of black-and-white would defeat me, I thought invading your village and wiping out every panda around my area would...change my fate.
Li Shan: Well, you do realize that by attacking the village, you only gave my son a reason to defeat you...besides your threat to destroy Kung Fu.
Icky: Which, hypocritically, is what you know as your own form of combat since...well...it's practically the greatest form of combat in your world.
Lord Shen: Look, at least the banishment left me to discover a greater purpose. I found hope in the heart of this young lady, which my family had been friends with for a long time. But...thanks to some mishaps...some involving the betrayal by her mother's pet owl...I thought I would lose her as soon as Cobra tried to wipe that hope off my history. But...thanks to these good heroes, I was able to reestablish my place. And I take great sorrow for what I did to your village. Hell, I even visit the ruins a fair share of times to mourn those that I was guilty of murdering. So...I don't necessarily blame you if you scold me for killing your wife. But to be fair, it wasn't me who did that. Boss Wolf was the one who stabbed her.
Boss Wolf:...(Chuckles nervously) Well, you told me to, sir!
Lord Shen: I know. But...what I'm trying to say is...I'm sorry, and I take full responsibility for it. So can you forgive me?
Li Shan: I already have. And...I don't really care about the apology because...I knew something was up when I saw the ominous red in your eyes.

_Kung-Fu Panda_-style Animated Flashback

Li Shan: (As Lord Shen cawed to sound the charge, Li Shan was able to avoid the attacks of several wolves, and saw Lord Shen giving commands)...Is that the prince of Gongmen City?...Why would he?...Wait a minute...(He notices the glowing-red eyes Lord Shen displayed)...Oh, no! Those aren't any natural eyes!...(Runs off) Honey! I think something's wrong with the prince of Gongmen City! Something's controlling him!
Po's Mother: What is it, Shan?
Li Shan: I don't know, but I think it means the extinction of this whole village! Where's Lotus?
Po's Mother: Over there! (They noticed Baby Po with Shen and the wolves)
Lord Shen: GET THEM ALL! (The wolves targeted Baby Po)
Li Shan: (He hammered the two wolves)...Take our son, and run away! (Po's Mother took off with Baby Po as the wolves chased them down)
(Lord Shen): Wait...the Panda's original name was Lotus?
(Li Shan): Yeah, we named him that because the Lotus flower's rhizomes were the first food he ever ate...and yet he didn't like it. Regardless, we still named him after the flower.
(Po): Blech, yeah, those roots taste like feet!
Lord Shen: (Chuckles) You are a brave panda, aren't you?
Li Shan: Shen, what has happened to you? With those eyes of yours, you don't look as if you are yourself! Whatever it is, it must be what's causing this senseless genocide!
Lord Shen: Why I am doing this is none of your concern! Whatever matters to me is the death of this village! Wolves, kill him! (Li Shan fought off the wolves, and was able to lead the pandas to fight off the wolves as best as they can give or take a few deaths, and those that survived watched from a snowy distance as their village burned to the ground)

Present

Lord Shen:...Wait a minute...YOU were the panda that challenged my forces?...I always thought that was another panda.
Li Shan: I couldn't understand what turned you into that abomination. Whatever it was, I knew I couldn't blame you entirely for the deaths of all my people. But ever since I heard that prophecy, the answers were all clear. I had no idea there were worlds beyond our own besides the rumors. Then I knew that an other-worldly evil did it. I thought for sure that you wouldn't be cured of this evil. But now that I see that the prophecy has come true...then...I need to say that I forgive you.
Lord Shen:...(Falls onto the floor sitting)...You...you knew there was something wrong this whole time?
Li Shan: Yes. Granted, at first I thought you were possessed by a demon, were an evil twin, were under a violent curse, or that we were attacked by an evil alternate universe Shen. Turns out, a freaky five-headed cobra just corrupted you because he himself was being corrupted by a disgraced Purple Dragon."
Lord Shen:... What about the other pandas?
Li Shan: I did tell them what I saw... but even then, they were still afraid because... well, corruption tends to be an unpredictable thing. It's like a magical version of a dual-personality disorder.
Lord Shen: Figures!
Ignitus: (He arrived) Well, then I guess that means Shen has an important mission of repentance to make.
Lord Shen: WHAT?!?
Icky: Trust me on this, Shen, you seriously need this. Not only to get an extremely-heavy boulder of major regret off your chest, (Brings up his iPhone) but to shut up some of our critics about how you never attempted to make amends to the Pandas.
Lord Shen:... Well... I'm still not entirely comfortable, but.... if this is needed to be done, then.... very well. It's about time I metaphorically slay the demons of my past once and for all.
Shifu: You're going to need some company in case any form of problems arise.
Po: I'll come! I would love to introduce you to some pandas I knew.
Tigress: Me and the other Five shall come as well. The rest of them didn't get a chance to really interact with the Pandas in light of momentarily being jaded zombies of Kai.
Sir Hiss: (Shuddered) That still makes me uncomfortable. I was afraid you were gonna be gone forever.
Viper: But I'm clearly fine, Hiss. (Coil-hugs Hiss in reassurance) Nothing will tear us apart again.
Boss Wolf: Well, I feel this is also my repentance mission because... well, since I'm guilty of listening to a corrupted pawn, it's just as much my fault.
Cynder: I'll come as well. Shen needs my help in learning how to deal with something I'm all too familiar with.
Icky: Me and my pals Iago and Fidget are in. Cuz' other than Po, ya need some comic relief to give ya some moral support, Shenny boy.
Shifu: Good. The rest of us will have to stay here in case any trouble forms during your absence. But if you need us, alarm us on the communicators.
Icky: Yeah, first sign of trouble, phone home, gotcha.
Lord Shen: Well, the Teleporter Beacon is still recovering from the fiasco with Icky and Iago's escapades, so Mr. Dodo, could you drop us off to DreamWorks China?
Mr. Dodo: I was just about to offer it myself, Shen. Don't worry, Air/Space Dodo is always open for business.
Lord Shen: Then start the van. It's time I got this stuff out of my chest once and for all. (They prepared the ship as they took off)
Sparx:...You think he can do this?
Kairi: He's gone this far, Sparx. He certainly can.

Chapter 2: A Warm Welcome to the Panda Village/Shi-Te's Decree[]

DreamWorks China

Li Shan: (Lord Shen and the group are already on their way) Fair to warn you, expect this to be a LONG trip.
Lord Shen: How long exactly?
Li Shan: About a hundred miles.
Lord Shen:...Okay, why couldn't we have landed the van at the village instead of going on this ridiculously-long and hazardous journey?
Icky: You should've thought of that before Dodo took off the last second. Besides, you could use the exercise, thin-legs.
Lord Shen: I GET PLENTY OF EXERCISE, YOU STUPID LITTLE BIRD!!!
Tigress: Shen!
Lord Shen:...(Sighs) I still say we take carriages. It'll ease the trouble.
Li Shan: Well, actually, the village is 10 days away by carriage. But when we walk through this shortcut, it'll take about 4.
Lord Shen: Oh, suuuure, you might get frostbite from the tall mountains and bruise your feet through long walks, but you'll get there faster.
Iago: Oh, quit your belly-aching, Shen, I'm sure the trip is not that bad.
Lord Shen:... Please tell me you didn't jinx us.
Iago: Oh, give me some credit, how should I know what this path looks like? I've never been through it before. It's basically going to be the same as any other damn one we Lodgers went through.
Lord Shen: (Sighs) Well, at least 4 days are better than 10. Come on, let's move. (They trended the path as a montage with one signature part of this music played as Shen prepared himself for the time he's been waiting for)

Save Kung Fu - Track 05 - Kung Fu Panda 2 Soundtrack

Montage Music Plays Starting at 2:20

Lord Shen: (After the montage ended, the entire group was all seen resting in a certain spot as Shen was seen having a dream)...

Shen's KFP-Animated Dream

Lord Shen: (He finds himself in a familiar area, seeing the Panda Village he attacked, as it was sunny and peaceful, but void of inhabitants)...This...this is the village...I attacked....(He recognizes the kites and the crops)...It's...all been restored!...(He smells a flower until a hand came out in it's place as the sunny peaceful setting turned dark and ominous as the hand came out and a panda zombie was seen)
Panda Zombie: MURDEREEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRR!!!
Lord Shen: DYAAAH, STRANGER DANGER!!! (Ran off as some more panda zombies came out of the ground)
Panda Zombie #2: WHY DID YOU KILL US?!?
Panda Zombie #3: OUR HOMES!!! OUR FAMILIES!!!
Lord Shen: IT WASN'T MY FAULT!!! I SWEAR, I WAS NOT MYSELF WHEN I ATTACKED!!! (A zombie hand grabbed his leg) YAAAHHH!! I NEED AN ADULT!!!
Panda Zombie #4: (Popping out of the ground) I AM AN ADUUUULLLTTT!!!
Lord Shen: YOU MOST CERTAINLY ARE NOT! (Tears the hand from his leg as he jumped and glided away avoiding the zombies, but they constantly surrounded him until a familiar panda appeared)
Li Shan:...You have committed some dishonorable acts, Lord Shen! So for your crimes against our people, WE SENTENCE YOU TO DEATH!!!
Lord Shen: (The zombies grab him, and they end up shredding him out of his robe naked)...OH, HOW DARE YOU!!! GET OFF OF ME!!! NO, NO, NOOOOOOO-

Reality

Lord Shen: (Wakes up in reaction) YAAH!!...(Takes deep breaths)...Oh, thank the divines it was just a dream.
Cynder: (She appeared) checked up on him)... Let me guess, guilt dream?
Lord Shen:...(Sighs)...I have a feeling that making it up to the pandas at that village will be harder than I thought.
Cynder: Yeah, it's not like I haven't had guilt dreams before. One time, I had a dream about being executed by the King of Atlantis. It was gruesome. But now I know that it will never happen because I've made it up to them. Trust me, as soon as we get this over with, you'll have the same satisfaction of knowing that it would only be a dream and nothing more.
Lord Shen: Still...I feel that this won't be easy. I know in that village, there's bound to be a panda who think so less of me, he'll sit on me until my organs and bones are crushed.
Cynder: (Chuckles) Don't get carried away, Shen. Shan said that the pandas may still fear you, but they've been advised to give you a chance. Even if they ARE knowledgeable of Kung Fu thanks to Po, they're not going to attack you at first sight. Mainly because they're normally peaceful folk, but you get my point.
Lord Shen: But the panda told me that they only became that way because of an ancestry previously forgotten where they have a strong knowledge of chi. Seriously, WHY didn't my parents tell me about that?
Cynder: It's possible that later generations have grown to forget their ancestral learnings that by the time they moved into a new location, your parents and their parents and so on must've assumed that they weren't very special.
Lord Shen: That seems to be likely. I bet their aspirations to be loungers must've cost them that ability momentarily. As I was saying about Chi, that stuff can seem pretty addictive to some folks in Kung Fu. Hell, the panda possessed a stronger force of chi before defeating that Kai monster. And believe me it was a good thing Kai didn't get a chance to suck it up, and not just because the canon of the movies and the TV show normally tend to stay as seperate as possible, because that Hero's Chi could've made him unstoppable.... and leave the panda dead as dust.
Cynder: Yes, and hopefully, we'll never get to deal with Kai again.... And I hope I didn't jinxed us sometime in the future. What we need to worry about is that there's nothing to be afraid of. The pandas are wise with their chi. There's no panda there who can be THAT grumpy at you.
???: I wouldn't get your hopes up about that. (Li Shan, Po, and the others came out)...Because I forgot to mention that there is at least one panda in my village that... Won't quite be happy with Shen's appearance.
Lord Shen: HAH! I knew it! I'm calling the van so we can ge-
Cynder: (Snatches the beacon) Okay, from now on, I'M in charge of the beacon. We don't leave until Shen does his responsibilities!
Lord Shen: Are you serious? You heard the panda, this guy is not going to like me.
Li Shan: I wasn't finished! This panda is my advisor, Shi-Te. He's been pretty upset that you had most of his family killed. However, he's sure to listen to me.
Po: Shi-Te?
Li Shan: Oh, you'll recognize him when you see him. He's the panda with the fancy robe and a goatee. He was usually a nice guy, but... let's just say, being exposed to tragedy can make you... a bit meaner than you usually are.
Mantis: Oh, and his name totally tells us that he's bound to be a big jerk. His name is LITERALLY a play on 's****y'. I swear, people in this series have weird names.
Po: Oh, it doesn't matter. We'll still prove that piece of Shi-Te that Shen has truly changed.
Li Shan: Don't be, too surprised that you'll end up getting into an arguement with him.
Po: But don't worry. Shi-Te still has yet to learn chi mastery. He was away on trading business when Kai was a problem.
Tigress: And that means no Kung Fu as well. So the worse he can do is petty insults.
Lord Shen: That may be true, but words can still hurt just as much as physical pain.
Icky: Then I bet the sticks and stones will hurt twice as bad.
Viper: Guys, let's just keep calm and give Shen the confidence of getting through this on his own. As soon as this trip is over, we'll be back in the Dragon Realms and we'll all have a good laugh about it. (A silhouetted ant-like figure was seen close to the ground shrouded by the night, and crawled away)
Lord Shen: But after everything I heard about that mean panda, I'm starting to feel a little uneasy about this whole thing.
Li Shan: You'll do fine, Shen. Now let's get back to rest. We're almost at the village, and we'll need enough rest to make it through the rest of the path.
Monkey: Try not to worry about Shi-Te too much. As long as he's the minority and the other pandas would be more open to acknowledge you, who cares what he thinks?
Lord Shen:...Yeah...you may be right. I mean, I bet nobody takes him seriously. (Scoffs) What am I worried about? I bet he's the outcast of the village.
Li Shan: He is my advisor. He would've been an outcast if he wasn't. Believe me, I can handle it from here. (They all got back to rest)
Ant-Like Figure: (He crawled several miles off into a large mound in a forest, got smelled by security, crawled through the tunnels, and then approached a silhouetted figure)...Your highness!...It appears Lord Shen...is beginning an effort of redemption to the Panda Village.
???:...Just what we've been waiting for. Inform Dai Shi. We attack tomorrow evening!
Ant-Like Figure: Yes, your highness! (Skitters off)

The Next Morning...

Icky: (The group is seen by the mountain area)...Okay, slight nitpick here. WHY would you guys come to the mountains? You're pandas, not polar bears.
Li Shan: It's the most isolated area we could find. We hardly had any visitors since this village is supposed to be secret. This location makes the perfect isolation to keep us safe from attack.
Icky: Oh, I guess that makes sense. You guys have enough fat to survive the cold. (Tigress nudged him) What? It's a hard truth!
Tigress: Just shut up for once. We're almost there. Just a few meters away.
Icky: (Sighs) I HATE the metric system! How much in AMERICAN?!?
Tigress: (Sighs) I don't know, why don't you just learn the metric system?
Icky: AND HEAR A BORING LECTURE FROM KOWALSKI?!? F*** no!
Tigress: Too bad, so sad. You're gonna have to someday.
Lord Shen: (Shrugs) Are we there yet?!?
Li Shan: We're just about there.
Icky/Lord Shen: OH, FINALLY!!! (When the group arrived, there was only the front of a mountain)
Lord Shen:... You mean it's on TOP OF THIS MOUNTAIN?!? How do you people get up there?
Li Shan: Easy. (Pulls a lever and a wooden lift rises from the ground, carrying Po, Li Shan, Shen, Mantis, and Boss Wolf)
Lord Shen:... Surprising sense of ingenuity.
Mantis: Why would you put an elevator in?
Po: The pandas here don't do stairs... And I totally know the feeling.
Li Shan: YOU GUYS WILL HAVE TO TAKE TRIPS, THIS ELEVATOR CAN ONLY HOLD A FEW PEOPLE!
Fidget:...Rats!
Icky: Pfft, screw elevators, some of us can fly. (The aerial Lodgers flew up)
Fidget:...Double rats!

Later...

Tigress: (The rest of the group went up the elevator and finally reached the Panda Village, which was green, serene, and sunny with several pandas inhabiting it)...
Lord Shen:...Not exactly a bad place. (The pandas stop as they noticed him and the pleasant music stopped)...Yeah, I'm back, alright? Surprised?
Li Shan: Fellow pandas, Lord Shen has come here on a quest of repentance. He seeks to redeem himself for the crimes he caused in the past. I'd like for us all to give him a warm welcome so he shall get started. (The pandas, though reluctantly, waved, and continued to do their chores)
Hugging Panda: I'd rather not hug him for the moment.
Lord Shen:...I have a bad feeling about this...
Young Panda: Stripy baby! (Comes up and hugs Tigress as she hugs back)
Lord Shen: (As they walked through the village) So, where's this Shi-Te guy?
Icky: P-HAH!! That's funny when you say it out loud! (The kid pandas were confused at this as their mothers escorted them away to ignore the indicated profanity)
Tigress: Have to say, this place is much different than the last time I was here. I guess they've been able to fix up greatly after that battle with Kai.
Po: Totally. I sure taught them well...for a beginner.
Icky: (As they walked through the village as the pandas tried to both avoid and welcome Shen at the same time) Speaking of that, how's Po been doing since he possibly became the new teacher of the Jade Palace since...you know...Shifu had retired from all that?
Po: To be honest, it wasn't that easy at first. Shifu is still the Master of the Jade Palace, as well as a member of the High Council, but...I wonder if this position technically makes me destined to be the next Master of the Jade Palace?...Or better yet...A HIGH COUNCILOR?!?...OOOOHHH-HO-HO-HO, THAT SOUNDS AWESOME WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT!
Viper: But being a member of the High Council is a big responsibility...as is being master of the Jade Palace. I'm pretty sure you won't be the Master of the Jade Palace or a technical High Councilor for a few decades. It takes a lot of potential and a lot of knowledge to even be qualified for such a role.
Fidget: So...where do we begin with Shen's redemption? We're in the village, and we need to watch out for a scream from that Shi-Te guy. (Icky scoffs)
Tigress: If you laugh at that one more time, I'm gonna drown you in one of those ponds!
Icky: Tigress, babe, I can't help it. Not that you'd understand humor since I've never heard you laugh before....Hell, I bet you've never laughed since you were a cub. Even Gelotodrone couldn't make you laugh.
Tigress: I'd take that as an insult...if it wasn't technically true. Humor hardly affects me. Don't know why, it just doesn't.
Iago: Wait, I have heard you laugh a few times in the TV series. Remember when Po told his Hopping Ghost story and you laughed it off? And that's only one of the many times you laughed.
Tigress: That was different. I meant JOKES don't phase me.
Monkey: I'm pretty sure you laughed at jokes before, Tigress.
Tigress: Okay, let me rephrase that, jokes RARELY phase me. It's not easy to make me laugh with even an easy joke.
Icky: Well, you wanna know something I learned on how to make people laugh? You just have to yell 'LAUGH!', whether aggressively, extendedly, or in a weird way. Like this, (In crazed voice) LAAUGGHH!! (Po burst out laughing)
Tigress:...Meh.
Icky:...BUH-LAUGH!!!...BILAUGH!!!! (Squeaky voice) LAUGH!!! (Manly voice) LAUGH! (Babbling beak) B-B-BL-A-B-BF-BF-BF!!! (Wheezed) LAUUUUgggghhhh!...Damn, you're just as dull as a rock when it comes to this stuff.
Tigress: Quite frankly, I don't give a flying feather about it. I'm more of a serious person. And I say we stop getting off topic and start getting this redemption thing over with.
Lord Shen: Indeed. I'd rather not have the prehistoric one make me look bad by spitting in my face with his 'laugh' screams. So, where is Shi-Te? The last thing I want is for the guy to pop out of nowhere and say-
???: Well, well, well.... If it isn't a certain psycotic angry bird. (A panda figure was seen in a higher elevation in a glare of the sun, and went right down the terra-ramp, revealing himself to be exactly as Li Shan dscribed, a panda in a yellow robe with a goatee)... How DARE you show your face in this village?
Lord Shen: (Sighs) And here we go! You must be Shi-Te!
Icky: Shi-Te-er than I expected with the color of his goatee! (Laughs until Tigress looks angrily at him)... Ahem... I'll shut up- (Later, he is seen getting his head dunked in a pond by Tigress as the others talk)
Shi-Te:... Is the tiger trying to drown him?
Lord Shen: She doesn't kill. She's just teaching the bird a lesson about uncalled-for jokes or comments.
Shi-Te:... Right. Anyway, you have some GALL coming here, peacock! You should be lucky I'm too mild-mannered for violence, otherwise I would break you like I would end up breaking a bamboo chair after siting on one with my BIG FAT BUTT!!
Lord Shen: GOOD SIR, THAT IS SO OVERKILL!!!
Li Shan: Shi-Te, what did I tell you about these kind of first-impressions? I told you I was bringing Lord Shen here to redeem himself. Now I advise you stop with this scolding immediately!
Shi-Te:... (Groans) It's such a shame that first impressions never go like you want them to.
Lord Shen: Yeah, for you, fatass!
Cynder: Shen, be nice! Don't expect a lot of sympathy from a guy you were warned was still tense at you.
Lord Shen: Well, I told you proving myself was going to be difficult with HIM around.
Po: Everyone, let's just stop with the bigotry, and just accept the fact that Lord Shen is not that same genocidal monster we saw him as.
Shi-Te: Like the Demon Underworld I will! He killed my mother, my father, my 3 brothers, my 2 sisters, my half-sister, my stepfather, my cousins, my paternal grandparents, one of my maternal grandparents, my nephews, and my uncle! The only family member left was my maternal grandmother... AND SHE DIED OF PNEUMONIA 2 YEARS AGO!!!
Lord Shen: I SAID I WAS SORRY!!!
Shi-Te: Too little too late, fan-butt! I suggest you get out of here!
Li Shan: SHI-TE, if you would calm down for a second, and let me remind you that HE WAS CORRUPTED!!
Shi-Te: I don't give a damn if it was corruption. He LET himself get tempted by that abominable cobra's tricks in the first place, so it's still technically his fault for listening to him.
Lord Shen:... I... I...
Cynder: Okay, that line has been crossed! You just said that to try and make him feel bad!
Icky: (Coughing aggressively with a soaked head) Yeah! He didn't come all this way and stop crying like a baby in his own room just to be criticized and told off by you! Show the guy some dignity!
Shi-Te: Wait, seriously? That guy cried in his room?! BAH-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!? Granted, I heard about how his parents always sheltered him, but, (Wheezes) HAH!!
Po: Now, wait a minute! What gives you the right to drag his parents into this to insult him more?
Lord Shen: INDEED! Why must you be more aggressive and insulting, pretending that I already don't know the answer?
Shi-Te: You attacked our village, killed some of our people, you chased us away from our old home.... And all over because the goat said a warrior of black-and-white was gonna kick your tail over being an idiot with fireworks.
Lord Shen:... I cross the line of you dragging the Soothsayer into this!
Shi-Te: Oh, REALLY now! Is that because she was pretty much the only one who LOVED you despite killing half a village of pandas who've done NOTHING to the peacocks? Hell, several odd years ago, we even helped them build an immortality-granting fountain to somehow stop an earthquake! That's some HELL of a thank you, buster!
Lord Shen: Shi-Te, please, I wasn't of my right mind. And please, don't blame the Soothsayer over this. For what it's worth, her prediction occurred regardless of what I did.
Shi-Te: Did it ever occur to you that it MAY not have been originally a panda who would defeat you? We're not the only things in black-and-white, you know!! Zebras, orcas, penguins, angelfish, EVEN SKUNKS!!
Lord Shen: (Showing a small bit of tears) MOST OF THOSE AREN'T EVEN NATIVE TO CHINA, YOU MORON!!!
Shi-Te: Yes, but the skunk thing might've still been a possibility!
Icky: Well yeah, you're technically not too wrong about the skunk thing because, in development of the second film, there was gonna be a skunk character with James Woods' voice. It was scrapped because James wanted out.
Shi-Te: But no! Instead... You had to pick on the pandas! (Lord Shen showed some more tears)
Lord Shen: (Sobs softly) Please! Again... (Cries)... I-I wasn't thinking straight!
Shi-Te: (Scoffs) Oh, that is RICH! He's crying like a baby. (Cynder growled)
Lord Shen: (He struggled with his tears) Please, Shi-Te, I couldn't control myself...
Shi-Te: Look on the bright side, Shen! Had you been able to kill off Po's real father, he would never have had the benefit of reuniting with his pathetic excuse of a son.
Po: HEY! What even gives you the right to be a complete jerk to the peacock?!? Again, pretending like I don't really know the answer.
Shi-Te: Oh, I have every right to be a jerk to that peacock, 'Dragon Warrior'! THAT, WASTE OF AN EGG, TOOK MY FAMILY FROM ME!! They ended up being among those that were killed! And you DARE expect me to forgive that, just because he NOW decides to turn against a bunch of demon-worshippers? And not even you can change that. And don't think the fact that you saved this village from the wrath of that lunatic Kai while I was away on trade business is gonna change anything.
Po: Look, I get it! Losing your family is the hardest thing ever for you. Everyone gets and sympathizes with you! But the Shen who did it is already long gone now. The real Shen was the one his parents raised, not the one Mang created. You all were more the victims of Mang than Shen, and even then, Mang himself was corrupted by Malefor, so you're his victims.
Shi-Te: Well, excuse me if it's more easier to blame the bird who ACTUALLY did it, then to blame a five-headed snake and a disgraced Purple Dragon who WEREN'T present at the time!
Po: True, but they pulled the strings. Malefor corrupted Mang, and being his exposé, he corrupted Shen and several others. It's corruption as a whole who's to blame.
Shi-Te: Well I can't physically call out an ABSTRACT CONCEPT, CAN I?!?
Li Shan: Shi-Te, listen, I understand what you're going through. He killed my wife and some of my family too. But he came here for an act of repentance. He needs to do this, and you're making it extremely difficult for him. So, I am asking you this as your master... In the darkest part of your heart... Can you give him one chance to redeem himself?
Cynder: And remember that you're only an advisor, not the leader.
Shi-Te: (Growls) OK, OK, FINE!! I won't kick out the bird... YET! I'll let this feathered slaughterhouse stay under ONE condition! NO NEW TROUBLE! I won't care if it was YOUR fault or not! If it has ANY form of having to do with YOU being here, then I'll sentence you to be banished from this village for a thousand years, or life!... Whichever ends first. And YOU, Po. Because you and your friends brought him here, the same WILL imply to you and them as well! Do you accept the terms? Refusal would mean you have to get out!
Li Shan: Shi-Te, have a sense of honor and know your place! You have a lot of nerve threatening to banish your own master's son like that! He saved us from danger and helped us see our ancient talent of chi! I could easily fire you for something like that! Not to mention you don't have the power to banish people! Only I'm allowed to do that.
Shi-Te: Democracy exercise, who suggests this deal proceed as planned? (All the pandas raise their hands)... Who suggests we don't?... Well, then the motion passes!
Li Shan: Oh, you ALWAYS pull that one off!
Shi-Te: The pandas have spoken, Shan! You dare go against them?
Icky: I'LL GIVE YOU SOMETHING TO GO AGAINST, S***-FACE! (Tigress stops him)
Tigress: No, Icky! It's for the best. It would be unwise to force this out on these good people. They are just not ready to trust Shen at the moment, and that's what we came here to do.
Shi-Te: Then I take it you'll accept the terms?
Tigress: You will have our word that Shen's time here will be far more peaceful than the old village.
Po: Yeah, I bet my Hero's Chi on it.
Li Shan: Thank you for at least trying, Shi-Te... Though barely. I promise you won't be even mildly disappointed. (Li Shan leaves to instruct the pandas to prepare a feast, as Shi-Te confronts Po face-to-face)
Shi-Te: You're lucky your dad is such a weak-willed soft-heart, Po. Otherwise, I would've been able to banish you and the peacock in a heart-beat, with little to no second thoughts, had I been sole leader. But make no mistake. If anything happens during your stay.... I'll gladly point fingers to a certain angry bird, and I'll make sure, even your dad, can't say no to me then! I'll be watching... Like a HAWK!! CAAAAAAAA-CAAAAAAAAA! CAAAAAAAA-CAAAAAAAA!! CAAAAAAAA- (Coughs), Oh, ugh.... That ruined the moment right there.
Tigress: You are such a disappointment on so many levels. (Shi-Te turned and left, but not without briefly turning around and looking at Shen and mouthing 'like a hawk' before accsidently tripping over a rock and falling face first into a swimming hole)
Shi-Te:... Nobody saw that, right?
Po:... Wow... He was like me if I had Makunga's 'charming' personality... And an admittedly kickass goatee.
Icky: Jeez, what a jerk! He turns his own people against his own master like that? Why would a jerk like him be your father's advisor?
Po: Dad told me the full story behind that. Because his family was good friends with his. And so, my father says he owes it to them to watch over their last descendant.
Icky: Well, for what it's worth, I hope that bastard gets fired.
Tigress: Let's not make the situation worse. We've just got to accept this deal like all the rest.
Mantis:... Wait? Where's Shen?

Elsewhere...

Cynder: (She was comforting a still-crying Shen)
Icky: (The others arrived) Aw geez, Shen! I am not used to you crying like that... or at all.
Iago: We have seen him cry before.
Icky: Yeah, but the closest I've seen him being like that was when he was gonna lose Celestia or Kairi, or when Fluttershy snapped at him over Zgork's issues and had the rest of us turned on him.
Lord Shen: *Sniffs*... What kind of MONSTER does he think he is? Why would someone like him EVER be an advisor to a leader of a village?
Po: Well, his family was friends with my father's family, so yeah, you're basically stuck with a single chance of redemption and the threat of all of us being banished.
Lord Shen: WHA...?!? SINCE WHEN DOES THAT ASSHOLE HAVE THE RIGHT TO BANISH SOMEONE?!? Isn't your father the only one who can-
Fidget: The guy pulled a democratic notion on him and now the pandas of this place want this and support his decision. Even Po's father can't ignore that.
Lord Shen:... (Shrugs) That's it! I'm leaving! I'm not going through with this if someone who isn't suppose to have that much power can turn the entire village is against me!
Viper: And where exactly are you going to go? We have the only way back to the Dragon Realms, remember?
Cynder: And we had a deal, Shen! You agreed to do this, and I will not let you back down on that agreement. I don't care what it takes, you are going to go through with this, or get banished trying! Think about Kairi. She wouldn't let you give up so easily either.
Lord Shen:... (Sighs) Fine! But if I DO get banished, and the panda has to say goodbye to his father forever, then I am blaming you!
Po: You just need to prove Shi-Te wrong, Shen! If you can help us save the UUniverses for at least 6 years, you can certainly do it.
Lord Shen: And what in the name of Gongmen am I supposed to do to win that fat stubborn jerk's trust?
Po: Simple... I am going to teach you how to use chi.
Lord Shen:... Me? Learning chi? Panda, I admire the offer, but, outside of the peacock family's skill with blades, we're not really masterful enough to be considered the kind of Kung Fu Masters to be able to wield something like that.
Po: True, but you don't have to be like those kind of masters. You just need to be you.
Lord Shen:... That, doesn't make sense.
Po: I know. But you'll understand eventually. Now stop being such a wet blanket and show Shi-Te you can do better.
Lord Shen: I don't know if I can, he's probably going to give me a hard time.
Po: Dude, you wanna give that Shi-Te guy the satisfaction of knowing you turned coward to his threats?
Lord Shen:...Well, no.
Po: You wanna let all of China get word of the rumor that some prejudicial fatass drove off one of the most ruthless Shell Lodgers of all time, ESPECIALLY when that prejudicial fatass is someone you wronged?!?
Lord Shen: No!
Po: ARE YOU GOING TO BE THAT GUY'S CRYING OLD BIIIITCH?!?
Lord Shen: NO! What the f*** am I crying about? I can do this! I didn't travel all these miles just to be back-sassed by some fat jerk with poop on his face!
Icky: Aw, s***, I was waiting for a moment to make a joke like that!
Tigress: Glad you didn't, otherwise I'd have to introduce you to the pond again.
Lord Shen:...So, Panda, where do I begin?
Po: Well first, you have to understand one important question.... Who are you?
Lord Shen:... I'm, the former prince of Gongmen City.
Po: That's supposed to be like, who you really are OUTSIDE of that.
Lord Shen:... Oh, good divines, I need a LOT of work.
Icky: You think?

Chapter 3: Beginning of Redemption/The Power of Chi[]

Meanwhile, back at the Ant Mound...

???: (Ants are seen building weapons to use for a grand attack, and working with them is a monk-like Hercules beetle with Chinese word tattoos on his wing case)...
???: Pan Zing! (The Hercules beetle, Pan Zing, turns around to see the same silhouette of the figure standing on a platform. The figure reveals herself to be an ant queen. The queen moved in a surprisingly-mobile haste as she leaped up in the air and multi-flipped across the area and landed onto Pan's nose horn in a dramatic fashion)
Pan Zing: Ahhh, as graceful and beautiful as ever, though literally as small as an ant, your highness Ta Cha. (Bows as Ta Cha jumped off his nose) Any word from the Mistress?
Ta Cha: That's why I am here, Pan darling. The Mistress has made her orders known. Our forces are to take over Gongmen City and capture Masters Croc, Ox, Bear, and Chicken, headmastered by Chao during a huge Kung-Fu meeting. Then we are to go after the rest of the Kung Fu Masters. Think a former member of the beetle monks can handle that?
Pan Zing: I have faced great opponents before, my queen. I fear not those that stand in the way of the interests of the Mistress.
Ta Cha: Good. We are to meet with her and her bird friends at the outskirts of Gongmen at midnight... Then... we begin our advance at dawn. Those Kung Fu masters are but practice to our REAL opponents.
Pan Zing: Indeed. I will meet you there soon, your elegance.
Ta Cha: Oh, Pan, you flatterer. (She flew up into the air and left)

Panda Village

Lord Shen: Okay, so how does this chi thing work when all I have to do is 'be me'? Isn't that like telling a fish to swim and not walk?
Po: Trust me, it's hard to get, but it's true. You need to look deep within your true self and see the life force within, and become great enough to manifest it. It's how all us Chinese warriors use chi these days.
Lord Shen: Oh, yeah, because I haven't heard the word 'believe, believe, believe' before. God, it's heard so often, I've started making a mental list of how many times I've heard it.
Icky: That's what I do when I hear heroic and villainous speeches. We hear those very often, too. We've been at this for so long, I'm sure the rest of us have formed this damn habit.
Po:...Well...my point is that if you're going to prove to Shi-Te that you're on the up-and-uppityness, you need to prove that you can use chi perfectly and responsibly.
Lord Shen: And what exactly is that supposed to accomplish?
Po: The pandas here, ever since they manifested chi thanks to my help, have grown a culture based upon chi. They view chi as a sign of enlightenment and strength. Like what Oogway believed in.
Icky:... One thing that bugs me about his past with Kai and the pandas... Kai was in the spirit realm for 500 years... So... How old was Oogway when that happened? Was he REALLY that capable of living for centuries?
Po: You'd be surprised what Chi can do, especially when he developed the Hero's Chi with that experience, and used it to defeat Ke-Pa and then pass it down to me. That, and he was a Galapagos tortoise. They tend to be around for a LONG time. And ever since I found out his experience with it and the pandas being good chi masters, I can see why he would pass the Hero's Chi to me instead of Shifu.
Lord Shen: So he made you the Chi-bearer out of being grateful to the pandas who saved his life after an ambush? And ignoring the fact that you were VERY different from those pandas?
Po: Well, those pandas were pretty much my ancestors in a way, but considering I used to be kind of a dope, I see why everyone sort've doubted me before. It... didn't help the modern descendants of those pandas have grown to forget about the use of chi.
Icky: Thing is.... this kinda brings a huge plothole in the KFP francise. If the pandas lived in the mountains 500 some years ago prior to the events of the movies, then what drove the pandas to live closer to that forest by Gongmen in the first place? WHY would they even leave the mountains? WHAT drove them to leave the mountains?
Po: Must've willingly went there to find better pastures and spread their grand legacy across China. Either that, or it was different mountains from these.
Icky: So Oogway lived 500 years ago to let the pandas teach him how to harness this natural ability with his former brother-in-arms, and they seemed to forget about it as the centuries passed? Why didn't he help keep the legacy alive?
Iago: He must've been very busy.
Cynder: For 500 years?
Iago: Yeah, even a Kung Fu master needs to do some work like...you know...getting a permit and s***!
Mantis:...It still makes no sense when you think about it.
Lord Shen:...So how is this learning of chi going to help me redeem myself?
Icky: Wasn't it already mentioned that chi is important to the pandas?
Lord Shen: Yes, but, I meant outside of that.
Po: Well, you see, when learning about the chi pandas' history...
Monkey: Thanks for studying something for once.
Po: You're welcome. Anyway, after learning about it, I found out that pandas had viewed masters of chi with a code of honor as a sign that their legacy is starting to be recognized and will spread quickly. They come to respect users of chi. However, some that use it for evil like Kai, they view...not so well. Chi is a power that can corrupt rather easily because it gives people amazing abilities and strength beyond all others. They respect masters that look over anything personal with this chi because they view it as a sign of strength and courage. If you can learn how to use chi, and use it for the greater good, the pandas will get to trust you a little more...I think.
Lord Shen: What do you mean 'you think'?
Po: I can't promise if this will work the way I described it. Especially on someone as rotten as Shi-Te. But we need to try.
Lord Shen: I don't know if I can learn to use chi responsibly. Cobra won me over because he knew I wanted more than to rule Gongmen City, and introduced me to the hidden dark power within the fireworks the peacocks invented. What if...this happens again with the chi? What if I get tempted with this chi just like Kai?
Po: Kairi told you better than that, Shen. You learned a valuable lesson about being responsible with what you discovered. It's why you decreed that your cannons be used sparingly or as a last resort when you first joined.
Lord Shen: Yes, but chi could be more powerful than my cannons could ever be. Power like my former position as heir of Gongmen and the dark power of the fireworks corrupt, but absolute power like chi corrupts absolutely. I fear that I will fall down the same-
Icky: Shen, dude, you are overreacting. You know not to be tempted by absolute power, you sure as f*** can't fall for the same trick again. You only got tempted because Cobra made you that way. Imagine if he WASN'T around? Would you have fallen for that dark power in the first place?
Lord Shen:...Are you speaking in terms of my original villain role, or-
Icky: The role in this series, duh. I mean, you did know of Kairi before you were banished, didn't you?
Lord Shen: Yeah, but only because I heard about her birth. My parents never introduced me to her because they had a lot of summits and a lot of work. Regardless, even if I had discovered the dark power on my own, in terms of this lore, I wouldn't have thrown my whole life away because of a thirst for something more.
Icky: Exactl-
Lord Shen: But that's the issue! To the Kung Fu Panda francise, that's not canon! I'm supposed to be a self-corrupted twat driven by a selfish desire for power.
Icky: Well, that same canon also said you're suppose to be a stiff by this point of time, but you're fine.
Iago: That same canon also said that Fu-Xi's hopelessly delusional, but he's actually more of a hero here.... Still loopy, but he's not villainous about it.
Mantis: The majority of the characters of KFP are doing the opposite of what canon said. Heck, even Oogway. In the 3rd film, he said he never tried to go back to the Mortal Realm, yet he shows up with Mufasa ALL the time to help us out. Heck, the episode where we dealt with Junjie posing as his ghost proves he was capable of it.
Po: He could've meant he never tried it to stay BACK in the Mortal Realm.
Mantis: Perhaps. Not to mention that contrary to what I said in the past, I am TERRIFIED of females of my own species.
Monkey: But why were you in love with Hao from that one episode of Legends of Awesomeness?
Mantis: Hao was a soytarian.
Icky: You mean she eats nothing but bean byproducts? And yet she's considered attractive?
Mantis: (Stares blankly annoyed).... It's not the beans that make you toot, moron.
Icky: Wait, soybeans don't make you toot?
Mantis: You're thinking of baked beans.
Icky: I just figured that all beans make ya toot.
Po: Actually, it's caused by fermentation of polysaccharides, something that not all beans do.
Lord Shen:... Of course the gluttonous panda would know something like that.
Po: Besides, we're losing focus. You just need something to motivate you to use the chi. So, what better way to do that than with me? The one who recently defeated a chi-sucking clown?
Lord Shen: With help from your panda friends.
Po: Yeah, but I still beat him. So, are you ready, Shen?
Lord Shen: Ready when you are.
Po: Okay, firstly, you need to start with something simple. (Gets to a flower) Make a flower bloom. (Po used his Chi to make it bloom)
Lord Shen:... Making a flower bloom? That's all? I kinda figured it was something that was gonna be more difficult.
Po: Making a flower bloom is basically the smallest and easiest chi technique you can perform. It doesn't require that much. It just needs heart and determination.
Lord Shen:...If you say so....(Closes his eyes, and tries to make the flower bloom, but he is hardly able to do it)...Okay, this chi thing is as complicated as Sudoku.
Po: It takes time. Heck, it even takes 30 years to completely master it.
Lord Shen: 30 YEARS?!?
Po: Well...yeah, that's what Oogway did. Besides, it won't take THAT long to learn a simple chi ability.
Lord Shen: Easy for you to say, you're a panda, a species that actually MASTERS the damn energy.
Po: Yeah, but I'm sure pandas before me have taught this energy to others, including Oogway and Kai. Chi seems to get around like wildfire. We practically discovered the stuff.
Lord Shen: So what would you say I need in order to make even a simple act of making a flower bloom?
Po: I'd say some training. You need to look deeper into your mind in order to figure this all out.
Icky: So what, you're going to enter his mind all chi-like?
Po: Are you kidding? Chi may be powerful, but it's not THAT level of powerful.
Icky: But...isn't chi, like, some kind of life force energy? Wouldn't it-
Lord Shen: If you think chi is like the ki in Dragon Ball Z, then you must be as stupid as the panda! Chi is not at that level in this world, and it works far differently. It can allow us to do many things, and from what I heard, requires vigor, courage, and being in one's true mind. I'm vigorous and courageous, but even with Kung Fu skills, I have yet to 'be in my true mind'.
Po: That's what I've been saying, Shen! You need to be in your true mind AND your true self in order to manifest chi. The reason you could almost make that flower bloom was that you had 2/3 of the requirements. And what you require right now is the most important factor in using chi. It was hard for me to do that, even with inner peace which is kinda like being in one's true mind, but Shifu says it's ALMOST the same thing. It took me a while to get the chi thing complete. You just need to find your true mind like I did.
Lord Shen: Well, I've technically ALREADY found inner peace right after you defeated me. It's how Mang was never able to corrupt me another time. The pain and suffering I went through when I thought that Kairi, the only person I cared for like family, was gone for good, it was like my heart was torn out by Mang's evil tricks. But when I became determined to find her as soon as I found out she was still alive, I finally found inner peace. I was finally immune to Mang's corruption tricks, though it didn't stop certain things like...say...my manifested darkness taking me over and destroying Time Square. I could see the error of my ways. But sorry to say, that inner peace indeed isn't enough to control chi.
Po: Which is why I'm going to help you go deeper than inner peace.
Boss Wolf: Like what, quantum-peace?
Icky: Is that real, or are you just making that up?
Boss Wolf: Would it matter if I didn't?
Lord Shen: Believe me, panda, I meditated ever since I discovered inner peace just to go a lot deeper, maybe even find much more peace so I can wipe out all the darkness Mang inflicted on me! Hell, I tried one of those existing chi practices such as feng shui, qigong, and hell even acupuncture, as UNBELIEVABLY painful as it was. Nothing.
Po: Maybe it's the darkness that's the problem. If you just needed to calm yourself deeper and avoid any anger issues, isolate yourself from any stressful situations like Shi-Te. If that doesn't help, I don't know what will.
Lord Shen: Okay, I'll see if I can do that. (Gets into a meditating position)
Icky: So... Would you like a little privacy or-
Iago: Oh, who CAN meditate when there's constant noise? Let's get moving. I mean, it's not like he's going to be going anywhere for a while.
Tigress: (As they left) That better not be a jinx, Iago.
Iago: It better f****** not!
Lord Shen:... (Takes deep breath as Shi-Te watched this from a balcony, scoffing and left)

Li Shan's Home

Shi-Te: You still think bringing him here was a good idea, Shan?
Li Shan: Of course. I brought him here for the greater good! He had to do this because he needs to completely atone for his sins.
Shi-Te: HAH! I bet he's bound to do something stupid later on.
Li Shan: Well, you didn't exactly role out the welcome wagon yourself, Shi-Te! You undermined my authority by throwing a democratic notion WITHOUT my permission. I would've decided that on my own, and you didn't need to rush that and make yourself look like a jerk in front of my son and his friends. Also, do you really think that the people of this village will let my son get banished after what he did for us? I bet by now, they'll realize that you really ARE the outcast of this village.
Shi-Te: I was just trying to make a point here, Shan. I saved you the trouble of the democratic notion.
Li Shan: Yet you needed permission from me first. Even then, I would've said no because you have no authority here, Shi-Te! You may be a friend of my family, but I do NOT tolerate you challenging my authority. So next time you decide to do something stupid, then I advise you leave it to me! And I'm sure the people would like it that way.
Shi-Te: Oh, we'll see about that, now won't we? I don't trust that peacock with this village. Why, I bet he's going to be tempted by the chi we have the same way that Kai person was.
Li Shan: But that cobra isn't around to let history repeat itself so easily. You are clearly underestimating Shen's potential. If he was truly here to harm us, he wouldn't have come with friends. I must calmly advise you to not give Shen a hard time during this whole repentance deal. If this does escalate because of you, then I'm afraid I might have to suspend you... Or worse. I may have no choice but to fire you as my trusted advisor.
Shi-Te: Oh, you'll need me, Shan. I'm only making sure this 'repentance' proceeds as planned. But the people have still spoken, and have agreed to the terms of this deal, and so it still passes. If Shen screws up, then he and his friends are never to return!
Li Shan: But even THEY have their sense of morality, Shi-Te! Eventually they'll realize that this deal isn't worth complete acknowledgment, and will demand that my son and his friends not be banished regardless of who you blame. They brought him here because they want Shen to do what he's been waiting for since he reformed. And if you can't see that, then perhaps you don't really deserve to be my advisor.
Shi-Te: You'll surely eat those words by the end of this repentance deal! I know exactly what I am doing here. Good day. (Leaves)
Li Shan:... (Sighs)... What am I gonna do with him?

Elsewhere in the Panda Village

Icky: So while we'll give Shen some space, how's about we get to know the locals more?
Po: Well, I don't necessarily see why not. The people here are good enough to introduce. (Notices Fidget being hugged by the Hugging Panda)
Hugging Panda: I don't know who you are! (Chuckles)
Fidget: CHOKING, NOT BREATHING!!!
Icky:...Who's Lotsa-Hugging Panda Bear there?
Po: Never quite figured out his name since it has yet to be explained. All you have to know is that he's quite a hugger. And that's Lei Lei. (A young panda with Po's Tigress action figure was seen hugging Tigress' leg)...That's Grandma over there...though she's not my grandma.
Grandma: YOU DURN KIDS GET OFF MY PROPERTY BEFORE MY FOOT MEETS YOUR GRAPES!!
Po: SORRY GRANDMA!!
Icky: Whoa, pretty feisty lady. Remind me not to get on her bad side.
Po: Over there's Mei Mei! (They see a dancing panda with a fan and ribbon as she waved a flirtatious hello to Po)... And- (Some woohoos were heard as two familiar pandas launched themselves from hampers and gave each-other a really-high-five)...Those are my two cousins, Dim and Sum.
Icky: Oh, way to 'Sum' it up, Po. I bet they're often rather 'Dim'. (A rimshot was heard as he laughed and Tigress face-palmed herself)
Tigress:... I can see why you and Bagheera hardly have a sense of humor, Cynder.
Cynder: Yeah. Sometimes it's funny, sometimes it's uncalled for.
Dim: (They arrived) Oh, it's okay. It's not the first time our names were made into puns. Shi-Te did the same thing one time. Hey Po! Nice to see you again!
Po: Same here.
Sum: And what a great opportunity to get to know the five more and..... Two naked birds, a non-Chinese dragon and a weirdly-dressed bat.
Fidget: Heh, not the first time I was commented by my attire...I only get commented on by how...silly and screw-uppy I am.
Dim: Wow, you must have it rough with your friends.
Fidget: More than you know.
Sum: Wow, you guys seem nice. Shi-Te must've misjudged you badly.
Tigress: Speaking of which, I suspect that the people here might not be fully agreeing to the terms of this deal. Shi-Te wants to banish all of us from this place after all we did for them.
Dim: You bet your tail we are against that! Even when we voted that the deal go straight, we knew it was going to affect you guys and us. We've been hearing people here talk about what Shi-Te was thinking, and they're considering protesting to make sure you guys remain allowed to be here.
Sum: After all, you guys brought him here for a reason, and they already knew that Shen was coming. They just agreed to Shi-Te for the redemption, and not for the rest. Also, we only agreed to that deal at all was because... Well, corruption is unpredictable, but trust me when I say that if the Dragon Warrior/Warrior of Black-and-White trusts Shen, then we trust him.
Icky:... So... When exactly are these guys going to protest?
Dim: They're about to start, actually. In fact, some pandas were so mad at Shi-Te's words, they've started chucking a lot of crap at his home. (A shatter was heard)
Shi-Te: (From distance) MY FAMILY VASE!!!
Fidget:... Uh-oh.
Crane: Oh, dear, that can't sound good. I mean, I'm glad the pandas are considerate to Shen's true meaning for redemption, but this is only gonna further demonize Shen to Shi-Te!
Mantis: Not to mention that this COULD count as new trouble concerning Shen's stay.
Cynder: We'd better calm everyone down and make sure this doesn't escalate!
Monkey: Exactly! The last thing we need out of this repentance deal is an angry mob of pandas hurting someone who, while a prejudicial jerk, is still worth protecting.
Po: Let's go! (They head out)

Shi-Te's House

Shi-Te: (Pandas were forming a mob outside his house and throwing props at it, and Shi-Te came out through a window) EVERYONE CALM DOWN, WILL YOU?!? I WILL GIVE YOU ANYTHING YOU- YAAH! (He shuts his blinds as a vase shattered on impact) Thank goodness kitchen sinks don't exist here yet... Along with proper plumbing, apparently, but still. I bet this has something to do with the peacock! Are these people really that caring for the guy who took our old home from us?!? If that peacock thought I was rough before, then wait until- (He screams as he ducks just in time as a jaded dragon statue crashed through the wall and smashed down his fine china and valuable irreplaceables, and almost caused a small urn with a lid to fall) EEK!! MY GRANDMA'S ASHES!! (Grabs the urn) I can't afford to let this get destroyed by mob mentality! (Shi-Te makes his retreat as suddenly, a rock was tossed in, Shi-Te tripped on it and during his fall, the urn was senting flying, lid struggling to stay close) (In slow-motion) GRRAAANNNDDMMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! (He jumped for it in slow motion, and actually caught it)... Whew! For a second, I thought she was a gon- (The Lodgers came in)
Po: Shi-Te! (Shi-Te drops the urn in surprise as it shatters)...
Shi-Te:... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! (Cries loudly)
Icky:... Personally, I like seeing him cry, but for the sake of being better than that, I'll not laugh at his misery.
Tigress: Good, because I would've started soaking your head again.
Shi-Te: YOU IMBECILES MADE ME DROP THE URN THAT HAD MY GRANDMOTHER'S ASHES!!! THAT'S IT!! YOU'RE FINISHED!!! GET THE HELL OUT OF MY VILLAGE!!
Mantis: Uh, no! Because of that mob outside, you can't tell us what to do anymore. If even Li Shan found out you tried to banish us because of some stupid urn-
Shi-Te: (Smacks Mantis to a wall) HOW DARE YOU CALL THAT URN STUPID?!? THAT URN CONTAINED MY GRANDMOTHER'S ASHES!!!
Mantis: (Pained)... Okay, admittedly, I made a bad call there.
Shi-Te: IT WAS THE LAST THING I HAD LEFT TO REMIND ME OF MY FAMILY!!! GET OUT OF MY VILLAGE, NOW!!!
Po:... Alright, listen here, s***-face! WE ARE NOT GOING ANYWHERE! If you continue to do this, we will tell father about this unethical banishment, and you will be fired.
Shi-Te: NOT IF I KICK YOU OUT PRIVATELY!! IT'S NOT LIKE THERE'S ANYONE ELSE WHO KNOWS ABOUT THIS!!
Panda #1: (Outside) WE CAN HEAR YOUR SCREAMS, YOU KNOW!! OUR EARS MAY BE TINY, BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN WE CAN'T HEAR GOOD!!
Panda #2: HE'S BANISHING THE LODGERS AND OUR SAVIOR!!! F*** HIM UP!! (The pandas end up breaking in and head straight for Shi-Te, who screams like a girl until the Lodgers defend him)
Icky: ALRIGHT, EVERYONE, SHUT THE HELL UP AND STOP TRYING TO BEAT UP SHI-TE!!! (The pandas stop)...Alright, this is bulls***! Alright, you all are not making it easy for Shi-Te!
Mantis: (After recovering) Yeah, the guy lost all his family belongings thanks to you....well, and us, but the point is that violence is never the answer.
Po: So PLEEEEEEEASE don't make it anymore harder for Shi-Te! He made a mistake because he can't help being prejudicial.
Panda #3: HE THREATENED TO BANISH YOU, THE ONE WHO TAUGHT US CHI AND KUNG FU!!!
Po: Because we brought Shen here. Yes it was thoughtless, yes it was stupid, but can you really blame him? Has he ever made any rash choices before?
Pandas: YES!!!
Po: Okay, okay, but should this one be any different?
Fidget: I'm pretty sure yes. Banishing their savior might just be much worse than what he might've done in the past.
Po: (Sighs) Guys, I taught you Kung Fu so you can use it for good, not for situations like this! I taught you all better than that! So may I ask that you refrain from making the situation worse with your attempted violence? (The pandas paused, and just walked off)
Shi-Te:...You...you saved me?
Icky: Yeah, dude. You may be a douche, but you're a douche not worth being punished with a fat lip.
Po:...So, I take it you'll agree not to banish us if this fails? In fact, you might already know the terms of this. If Shen fails, he doesn't come back. If he doesn't fail, then you-
Icky: You admit publicly that you're a douche bag...IN FRONT OF THE F****** KIDS!
Cynder: WHOA, ICKSTER, THAT'S REALLY PUSHING IT TOO FAR!!!
Icky: Okay, then how about a big fat jerkoff?
Cynder: How about an apology AND an unrelenting acceptance that Shen has changed, and is always welcome to this village?
Icky: I still say he embarrasses himself in front of the pandas!
Tigress:...May I-
Cynder: Yes, you certainly can!
Icky: What are you- (Tigress grabbed Icky by the beak, and took him out as gurgles and splashes were heard outside)
Po:...So...will you accept the new terms of this deal, Shi-Te? It would be a wise choice to make if you don't want these pandas at your throat again.
Shi-Te:... Okay, okay, FINE! We'll do it your way, but PURELY out of proving that I can be grateful. If this fails, I still want that peacock out of here, no ifs, ands, or buts!
Iago: In your case, it's a pretty big 'butt'.
Shi-Te:... I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that. Now, please get out of my house.
Viper: You sure you don't want us to help fix up?
Shi-Te: I'm kinda in a negative position with you people at the moment, even IF you just saved me from a beating akin to my teenage life. I kinda want to be alone here.
Icky: Okay, okay, we get it, you're not thrilled about us either.
Po: Ok, Mr. Shi-Te. We'll...let everyone know you changed the deal. (They left as Shi-Te began cleaning up his grandmother's ashes and placed them in a bowl, one of the only things that survived)
Shi-Te: Ugh... Even with my hard-earned money from being responsible for many trades with other mountain villages, this will take forever to fix.

Shen's Location

Lord Shen: (He was still meditating in the same spot)...(Quietly) Inner-peace.... Inner-peace.... (Po was heard falling and splashing)... (Sighs)... Inner peace....
Po: Hey Shen! Good news! We got Shi-Te to agree to not banish us.
Mantis: But the guy still isn't going to let you off the hook if you fail.
Fidget: It was hard considering the angry mob of pandas that were trying to beat up Shi-Te.
Lord Shen: What?
Fidget: Yeah, they were totally against us being banished if you failed. So we called them off, handled the whole situation, and now, we're spared.
Lord Shen:... So... Shi-Te was almost beaten up? Well, aside from needless violence, it's great to know the pandas aren't THAT obedient to that ingrate. Now I can't worry about anything knowing that the pandas consider me worth it after all.
Crane: Don't over-read it, Shen. Just because they don't gate you, it doesn't mean they don't worry about you reverting back to evil. They're still a little skeptical because they still believe corruption is unavoidable, especially since you're learning chi. Chi can be a factor in corruption. Kai, was pretty big proof of that.
Lord Shen: Well, now you know why I myself am concerned about this.
Po:... Speaking of chi, how have you been doing with that?
Lord Shen: Just fine. I... Wait, where's the tiger and the prehistoric one?
Icky: (He and Tigress arrived as Icky coughed hard as his head was wet again) FOR GOD'S SAKES, YOU DON'T HAVE TO NEARLY DROWN ME TO DEATH, I WAS GONNA HAVE A GODDAMN HEART ATTACK!!! I SWEAR, IF YOU WEREN'T BIGGER AND TOUGHER THAN ME, AND HAD YOU NOT BEEN BORN WITH AN ABILITY TO MAKE BABIES, GIVE OR TAKE ON HAD YOU NOT BEEN A KUNG-FU MASTER, THEN I WOULD SLAP YOU ACROSS YOUR PRETTY STRIPED FACE!!!
Tigress: Too bad, you can't. Get used to it.
Lord Shen:... Anyway, I'm doing just fine with my meditating. I'm starting to feel a lot more at peace than ever.
Po: Well, then, let's try and do the flower test again.
Lord Shen: Well, I still don't have tremendous faith in myself, but... well, it never hurts to try.
Po: Okay, then. (Got out the pot with the flower, and Lord Shen concentrates as best as he can)
Lord Shen:...("Inner peace...")...(He actually manages to make the flower bloom)...Whew!...(Sees he did it)...Hey, that actually worked.
Po:...You're ready!
Lord Shen: Really?
Po: Yes. Let's just hope that what the pandas think of you is wrong, and you don't end up like Kai. Chi is something that should be used responsibly like Kung Fu. You need to use it to the best of it's ability. If you look even deeper in yourself, you'll learn to use more of it's power.
Lord Shen: Hopefully I will, and I'll prove that fatass Shi-Te wrong. Now let's get this over with. Where do I begin with my greater chi training?
Li Shan: (Walks in) Well, it's funny you mentioned that....

A Devastated Crop Field

Li Shan:... This area was once a beautiful and luscious wheat field, and the epicenter of the many trades our village makes.
Icky: Uh, question? Isn't being a 'secret' Panda Village supposed to mean that nobody knows about this place?
Li Shan: Don't get me wrong, it still justifies the secret name because our village is not recognized by official Imperial maps or cartographers. We're not that big of a secret to trusted friends... or smart enough enemies. And sadly, the Locust Bandits of Sin Su Mu are among them. At least... mainly because they follow their sense of smell very well... and they LOVE crops. And you can clearly see what happens after they enjoy themselves too much.
Mantis: Ugh, I know those jerks! I always have to chase them off every crop-field in the Valley. Those guys are ANNOYING to deal with every time.
Li Shan: And our new wheat shipments are expected by the start of next week. And it doesn't look like our crops will recover on their own. I figured that... you can used your chi to give them some accelerated help.
Lord Shen: Wait, but... aren't you guys already capable of doing that on your own?
Li Shan: We are, but... some of our farmers were away when Po first came here, so... they have yet to learn it themselves.
Lord Shen:... Okay...(Sighs)... I'll see what I can do. But don't be too disappointed if I can't make the crops recover quickly.
Icky: Wait... won't restoring the crops end up attracting back those Locust f***tards to ruin it again?
Monkey: Well, that's where we come in, of course. Mantis, you handle those locusts very well. In fact, you have a lot of insect enemies, right? There's Ta Cha Ant the Warmongering Army Ant Queen, Pan Zing the Hercules Beetle, Scing Wa Zhu the Conquering Hornet Queen, Ztang Ja Wun the Mongolian Bee Thief Queen, the Emerald Beetle Bandit who was responsible for spreading his legacy across other continents of this world, Saku Su the kunoichi butterfly thief, and the Midnight Moth Thief Clan.
Mantis: Actually, I have two MAJOR enemies. Those others I've dealt with a few times, but two of them I've dealt with PLENTY of times. Those two enemies are Ta Cha and Pan Zing. Scing was the third most often-occurring enemy, Ztang I only dealt with once even though she was a serious threat, but as a Mongolian carpenter bee, she only does her crimes of stealing honey in her home land. The Emerald Beetle Bandit has been in prison for years, Saku Su, despite seducing me with her chi charming techniques, has been exiled to Japan, and the Midnight Moth Clan is being handled well by other Kung Fu legends like Master Lizard since...he naturally eats insects. Ta Cha and Pan Zing are the only two that have done the most against me than any of them, INCLUDING the Sin Su Mu Bandits. Those two have KILLED some of the Sin Su Mu's members by the hundreds.
Icky: And who exactly IS Pan Zing?
Mantis: Once... an honorable member of the Chi Monk Beetles. A Hercules beetle.
Icky: Why once?
Mantis:... Tragedy.

KFP-Animated Flashback

(Mantis): A jackal bandit raid destroyed Pan's village and slaughtered a majority of the inhabitants... including Pan's wife and children. It happened while Pan was away in the Chi Monk Temple. When he finally got word..... Pan was devastated. (Pan Zing screamed as he stood in sorrow of his destroyed village) In his sorrow and uncontrolled emotion, he sought to destroy the Jackal Bandits for what they did... and like Kai... he made the mistake of using chi to do it. (Pan Zing was seen taking away the chi of the Jackal Bandits in similar fashion to Kai, turning them into jade stones) Pan declared war on villainy, and used an army of Jombies made of his victims to attack every criminal in China. From the common mighty warlord (A gorilla warlord was overwhelmed by Jombies)... to even so much as a petty bread thief. (A cowardly weasel bread thief was cornered by Jombies) All met the same fate. (Pan Zing took the chi of the two and turned them into Jombies) As understanding of the fallen monk's tragedy as they were, the Chi Monk Beetles and Oogway, knew he had to be stopped, for they knew his misuse of chi would corrupt him to start targeting the innocent in a delusional quest to maintain his idea of order. But Pan was not an easy challenge. He was a powerful master capable of using chi to shake the ground and cause controlled earthquakes. (Pan Zing was seen bashing the ground and causing earthquakes, proving to be a challenge to even Oogway)... But in the end, it was Oogway who rose triumphant. He exiled him from both the Chi Monks and his own hometown in disgrace. But not before Oogway took his chi abilities from him so he could no longer cause anymore damage. But even without chi, Pan was a master in Kung Fu, and was a challenge even to me....

Present

Mantis: And worse, he did all he could to learn powerful Kung Fu techniques. But because of his criminal status, it was all but impossible. The only thing he could learn was the Lotus Clap, and even then, that was not very useful against masters like us.
Lord Shen:...What about Ta Cha?
Mantis: Oh, she's got a legacy as an ant queen who slaughtered dozens of ant colonies across China.

KFP-Animated Flashback

(Mantis): Her story started as a princess for her ant colony. She was destined to do great things. But that was when another army ant colony invaded. (An actual ant fight was seen)...And in the end, the other ant colony won, and killed the queen, stole all the food, and made slaves of the fallen kingdom, the princess included. It wasn't until Ta Cha learned powerful chi techniques that the enemy colony's queen was killed as she named herself the new queen, making slaves of HER colony. Her mother finally avenged, she ended up declaring a war against other neighboring ant colonies, and also termites that wanted to take over. Ta Cha prevailed in every single attack, but at the cost of many lives. I was able to hold off some of her invasions, and despite her weight and tiny size, she was still able to fight for herself. She could tackle you anywhere and her small size would make her almost impossible to see. Worse was that she knew the Pressure Tap of Gao Ming, which with a single tiny tap, can attack all available pressure points and weaken the target instantly. This is how she was able to tackle larger foes. She was a challenge even for me. She attacked the Jade Palace once with her colony's enhanced teamwork and skills, but we still won regardless. I was always there to stop her when she was trying to attack a defenseless and innocent colony of insects.

Present

Icky: Yikes. Those two in particular sound like they make these Locust guys look like cheap thugs.
Crane: Technically, they ARE cheap thugs.
Icky: I know, but still. What about those other enemies of yours?
Mantis: That's something I'll have to explain another time. Right now, it's time Shen did this chi test.
Lord Shen:...Okay...(He closed his eyes and concentrated)...("Inner peace...")...(He was only able to restore over 10 crops in the garden)...Huh?
Li Shan: Well, it's still a work in progress, but I guess it works very well. Do you have enough energy to do it again?
Lord Shen: Afraid not. This is pretty much the best I can do for the moment. Until I can train myself better, I think you need to watch out for those locusts.
Mantis: Yeah, no plague of locusts is going to go down here.
???: OH, YEAH?!? (5 locusts appeared)
Mantis:...YOU CLEVER BASTARDS WERE WAITING FOR THIS TO HAPPEN?!?
Locust #1: Yeah, so suck it!
Mantis: You know we can't allow this!
Icky: Yeah, because there's several of us, and only five of you!
Mantis:...Did you even pay attention when I said 'plague of locusts'?
Icky:...I thought the clan was just comprised of a few members. I mean, didn't you kill a few of their members- (The locusts chirp loudly together as a swarm of locusts appeared from the bush)
Mantis:...You're not familiar with the reproduction rate of locusts, are you?
Tigress: THIS is why you need some tutelage from more than the metric system.
Icky: Oh, shut up!
Locust Leader: Ah, the Furious Five! It's been too long since I've seen you! And I see you brought friends...and I also see you replenished more food for us to steal!
Lord Shen: OVER MY DEAD BODY!!! I DARE YOU TO GET PAST US AND STEAL THESE CROPS FROM OUR COLD DEAD- (The Locusts brought out tiny but deadly weapons)... LIKE, DEFEATED BODIES!
Locust Leader: (He laughed heartily) My gang's MORE than happy to oblige, peacock! CHARGE!! (The locusts charged)
Po: PREPARE FOR BATTLE!! (The locusts ended up using their weapons to stab the heroes repeatedly) OW! OW! OW! THIS IS MORE PAINFUL THAN ACUPUNCTURE!!!
Mantis: SIN SU, STOP!!
Locust Leader (Sin Su Mu): And who's gonna make me? I've been reproducing rapidly since we last fought. (The locusts were able to steal the grown crops despite the heroes' attempts to stop them, and they fell down defeated)
Mantis:...YOU THIEVING LITTLE JERK!!!
Po: WHY ARE YOU SO LIKE THIS?!?
Sin Su Mu: We're locusts. Fish gotta swim, crops gotta get eaten. Deal with it! THANKS FOR THE CROPS, LOSERS!!! (They took off laughing)
Li Shan:...Well...that went downhill fast.
Lord Shen:...And there's no doubt that they'll be back as soon as we restore this crop garden to full health!
Mantis: And with their increased numbers, I don't see how we're going to beat them as easily as we did before. Last time we fought him, he didn't have THAT many members.
Icky: Probably because you haven't seen the bastard in years! That gave him PLENTY of time to increase in numbers. With that, we're as useless to stop them as the Penguins are to stopping the Hornets.
Iago: (Sighs) If you guys only invented pesticides, this would be much more easier.
Lord Shen:...Can chi make crops...pest-proof?
Li Shan: From what we learned, yes. But it takes power worthy of Kai to reach that kind of capability. We have yet to reach that kind of level.
Po: And I am only HALF as strong as Kai with my chi abilities. These locusts are just going to keep coming back and stealing our crops unless we find a way to make them pest-proof.
Lord Shen:... Then maybe I can become powerful enough to make the crops pest-proof.
Po: But that takes, like, Oogway-style enlightenment to even get that far.
Lord Shen: True, but I wager that if I better understand who I am, then maybe I can make pest-proof crops. And I'll do it without the chi getting into my head.
Cynder: I'm surprised you're becoming more proactive in making amends, Shen.
Lord Shen: Well, I guess it helped that Shi-Te has more or less relented on being rough on us. I need to further understand myself to have a greater chi ability. And to do that, I must relearn what it is like to enjoy myself.
Po: Then you came to the right panda village for that.
Shi-Te: (He was seen watching in secret as they were talking)... Okay, outside of the Locust Bandits stealing our crops again, I'm surprised the peacock was able to make at least a small percentage of them grow back.... But he still needs to prove himself. And I still need to judge fully. (He left)
Boss Wolf: So...how long will gaining enough strength last?
Li Shan: I should say about a few days.
Boss Wolf: A FEW DAYS?!?
Lord Shen: It's okay. Nobody said this was going to be a quick process. I can wait a few days to get this over with.
Po: I certainly hope so. We can't take TOO long with this whole deal.
Li Shan: Now, then, it's best we got some shut-eye. We've got a big day ahead of us, and a lot of repentance for Shen to get through. (The group left)

Chapter 4: An Ant Apocalypse/The Sister of Boss Wolf[]

Dawn the next day, Gongmen City

Master Chao: (He was at the palace courtyard with as Ox, Croc, Chicken and Bear) I'm glad all of you came. Now, we are to discuss new urgent matters. (As Chao continued speaking, the camera pans over to outside the gates of the Gongmen palace, and shows Ta Cha and Pan Zing slowly walking torwords the gate. The Antleope guards quickly held their ground against the two intruders)
Pan:... Allow me to take care of these fools who stand in our way, your highness.
Ta Cha: Oh, Pan, you're such a gentleman. (The Antelope Guards charged, then Pan crushes the earth beneath them as they fell and got injured)...(Chuckles)...
Master Chao: (They feel the tremors)...Oh, no! They're here already!
Ta Cha:...Uh...how do we get in? I'm not small enough to go underneath the door, and going over the wall would give us away too quickly.
Pan: Easy! (Smashes the door to pieces)...Like that! (They entered the courtyard)...Well, if it isn't Masters Chao, Ox, Croc, Chicken, and Bear! We have been looking for you- (Their dialogue could barely be heard by the Kung Fu Masters)
Chao:...YOU DO KNOW WE CAN'T HEAR YOU, RIGHT?!?
Pan:...I SAID, YOU ARE THE ONES WE'RE LOOK- (They could still not hear him)
Chao:...Oy! (They approached them closer)...Now I'm sure we can hear you, Pan Zing and Ta Cha Ant!
Chicken: Ba-gawk, I really wish I can squish those jerks.
Bear: Yeah, I wish I could stomp on them, too, Chicken.
Ta Cha Ant: We have come for you all by order of our secret benefactor!
Chao: If you think we're going to be willing to surrender to whoever you're working for, then you are absolutely mistaken.
Pan: Oh, we didn't come to ask, Chao-Mein!
Croc: You think you are a match for us?
Pan:... Do you not know what we're capable of? I'm sure you heard me shake the earth back there!
Ox: Speaking of which, how did you get your chi abilities back? Oogway made sure that was long lost to you!
Pan: Oh, I found a way, leave it at that!
Chao:... Who do you work for? Whoever it is, it must know a lot about chi!
Bear:... Oh, no! It's not Kai, is it?
Pan: HAH! Are you kidding? Kai wouldn't have gotten help. He's an independent villain who can make plenty of followers for him. Who DID hire us is not your business... Yet!
Ta Cha Ant: So are you going to come quietly, or am I gonna have to finish this quickly?
Chicken: Ba-gawk! Yeah? You and what army? (Suddenly, the entire courtyard got surrounded by army ants that formed structures that held the masters down) BUCK-BAAAAAAWWWWWW!!!
Chao: LET US GO THIS INSTANT!!!
Ta Cha Ant: Oh, we'll let you go... Right after THIS! (She tiny-poked Chao and he flinched as he was rendered immobile)... (Chuckles)... And you guys are next! (Everything went white as Ta Cha attacked again)...

Gongman Tower

Chao: (The masters are tied togather by rope as the army ants snapped them out of being immobile)...AGH!? What is the meaning of this?! Who's behind this travesty?! (A falcon and some hawk followers flew in and landed)...(He sighs) Of course, Xao Su Ting. Wife of Kung Lao. And I see you brought the infamous Hawk Brothers with you.
4th Hawk: Uh, three brothers and a cousin, actually.
Chao: Of course, my mistake. I trust Pan Zing and Ta Cha working together was your doing?
Xao Su Ting: (Laughs) Charming compliment, but... I can't claim credit for this. See... I'm a player in this as well. Someone who would put even me to shame is in charge of everything. She should be here any second now. (A Figure soon jumped up from nowhere and landed onto the balcony with a strange-looking spear as music played)
Chao: (He gasps) I should've known!
Chicken: BAWK! Oh, don't tell me it's- (A female wolf comes out of the shadows as she spins around the spear. Ta Cha and Pan Zing were seen as they bowed to her, as did the army ants, Xao and the hawks)
Chao: (Sighs) I was wondering when you were finally gonna strike... Dai Shi.
Dai Shi: (Chuckles gently) You'll have to pardon my tardiness, Master Chao. I was busy searching for a weapon so legendary, even Oogway bowed in respect to it's name. (Shows the spear) Master Moo's long-lost ultimate weapon.
Chicken:... (Cluck-laughs) A SPEAR?!? WHAT'S SO GREAT ABOUT A-
Chao: Chicken, that is no ordinary spear! That's-
Dai Shi: Shhh! No need to explain.... A demonstration's WAY more exciting. (This theme plays as Dai Shi demonstrates what the spear really is as it changes to many different weapons, to the awe and shock of the trapped masters)

KUNG FU PANDA 3 - KAI THEME SONG

Bear:... The Weapon of Morph Wao!? The greatest creation of the fabled master Morph Wao and last wielded by the fabled Master Moo? But... how? It was destroyed during the famed Last Stand of Moo when he sacrificed himself to stop an invading army from destroying his own army.
Dai Shi: Well, yeah, it was. But I found it, put all the pieces back together, and restored it to it's true glory. Plus...(Giggles)...being the ingenuous genius I always am... I gave it some upgrades. (Spins the weapon again to turn into a staff-like firecracker launcher)... I bet Moo never thought of giving this thing a firecracker launcher, now did he?
Chao: You... You found the legendary lost weapon of a fabled Kung Fu Master and restored it?
Croc: And gave it some albeit cool new tricks?
Dai Shi: Yes, thank you. And the best part? Those Villain League bastards would never see it coming. They'll pay for what Mang did to Lord Shen and my brother.
Ox: Please listen to reason, Dai! Your heart's in the right place, but your mind is not! Any attempt to attack the League, even with the Weapon of Morph Wao, would only risk you and that weapon ending up in their service, along with those that are foolish enough to follow you.
Dai Shi: You think I'm stupid enough to consider this thing alone as my plan for revenge on them? (Scoffs) Of course I'm aware the weapon alone won't be all that does them in. But this weapon, combined with the power of chi... Now THAT might generate real results.
Chao: Do not underestimate Mang, Dai. He may have grown to be more or less a fool, but he is still a competent threat. He still knows how to work around even the most careful of your plans and even any devastating attacks even the likes of Pan Zing would offer.
Dai Shi: Ugh, and still you don't have faith in me.... Like how you won't help me in my cause.... Why? Don't you High Councilors hate The Villain League and their demon-loving antics?
Chao: Yes, but you're no better! You're doing this against the greatest threat to the UUniverses! They'd finish you off in an instant, even with all that power you have. They have members that have defeated people like you.
Dai Shi: Oh, believe me, after all these years, I think I'm certain that I will kill their smug asses for corrupting my once-honorable leader!
Bear: Pal, that 'once-honorable leader' you speak of is STILL honorable.
Dai Shi: Oh, I know.
Chao: (They were surprised)...You...you do?
Chicken: BOK-BOKAAA!! THEN WHY THE F*** ARE YOU GOING THROUGH THIS IF YOU KNOW SHEN IS NOT EVIL ANY LONGER?!?
Dai Shi: Oh, him reforming isn't enough. I want the villains to pay for what they reaped on him in the first place. I want them to wish that they never messed with him! We slaughtered dozens of pandas! That's a crime that cannot be looked over. I want them to never do anything as destructive as that again!
Bear: It's not going to work, Dai! They'll kill you the second you storm into that fortress! These followers of yours aren't even going to change that. The only ones who have EVER stood a chance against them is the Shell Lodge Squad!
Dai Shi: Yet THEY are bound by rules and their own moral limits. I am not! I otherwise respect their feelings about not ending a life, even theirs, but that only means it is not their destiny to destroy the League! No... it is MINE, because I follow my own rules! And my #1 rule IS TO NEVER GIVE UP UNTIL ALL THAT I WANT WIPED OFF THE FACE OF THE UUNIVERSES IS WIPED OFF THE FACE OF THE UUNIVERSES!!!
Ox: You're making a big mistake, Dai! If you try and fight them, you're GOING to be killed!
Dai Shi: NO! I DIDN'T COME ALL THIS WAY TO BACK DOWN!!! I've learned as much chi techniques to take down even Maleficent! I will destroy them and take great pleasure dancing on their scorched corpses.
Chicken: Buk-buk, you have issues.
Chao: Seriously, how do you expect to destroy the entire Villain League with that weapon, chi, and just those followers?
Dai Shi: Oh, they aren't the only ones that will follow me.
Bear:...What're you talking about?
Dai Shi: You see, I didn't just conquer Gongman just for laughs, fellas. I did it because it has quite a population of people. People, I can train Kung-Fu and the power of chi to. People I can turn into soldiers! Soldiers as powerful as Ta Cha's ants. Soldiers worthy of a former member of the Chi Monk Beetles. Soldiers not even Villain League Shocktroopers would stand a chance against.
Ox: The league adapted to powerful armies before. An army of chi-wielding Kung Fu masters won't be any less different.
Dai Shi: Well, if I make the mistake of rushing, yes, but I'll take my time and train them to be almost like an army of Oogways.
Croc: Then that'll just invite the League to strike while you're busy preparing yourself. When they feel that there's a threat being made against them, they have been prone to take care of it personally and with as little mercy as possible.
Dai Shi: That's why I need to scare them to let me properly prepare for them. I am going to...'convince'... the famed Dragon Warrior to teach me to become a truly-supreme master of chi like him.
Chicken: BAWK-BA-HAH! Good luck with that one! Bawk-Bawk, the Dragon Warrior isn't one to teach the likes of you anything.
Dai Shi: Considering who the Dragon Warrior was taught by, yeah, no s***, chicken-wings.
Chicken: Hell, you never got ANY Kung Fu or chi training because all you'd do with it is this, bawk-bawk!
Dai Shi: Why did you think I was gonna start kidnapping all of the Kung Fu masters in China, starting with you five? I know even the Dragon Warrior isn't gonna sacrifice you just to avoid being MY teacher. The fat panda, ironically, doesn't have the guts to give up people's lives even if it guarantees the safety of the UUniverses. Besides, he's definitely not gonna say no to protect the people that, in a way, ruined his life, too. Shen attacked that panda village after all. It was his home. Po would have to be an IDIOT to say no to me.
Croc: Well, uh... he kinda is, so you might be in trouble there.
Dai Shi: Oh, even an idiot like him knows when he's dealing with a deal he can't shake. Espeically, where saying no means I'll have to train myself in improving my chi powers like have after being denied ANY level of Kung Fu or chi training. And... it'll be on you five! I plan to end the Villain League through using the Chi Jade Technique.
Bear: So basically, you're gonna go Kai on them and turn them into Jade Zombies?
Dai Shi: One small exception: I won't bring them back as Jade Zombies. I'll just keep their jade jewels as trophies, to use as examples of my power as the slayer of evil. After the League's done for... (Chuckles)... who's to say I'll stop there? I might consider going after the other villain teams. In fact, why just them? I'll seek out EVERY VILLAIN IN THE UUNIVERSES AFTER I GET RID OF THE LEAGUE! Whether they're obvious or less recognized as villains, it doesn't matter. If they're not reformed... I'm coming after them.
Chao: Please, Dai Shi! You need to understand that the more you take, the more you will lose. You will only end up like Kai. Another chi-hungry parasitic vampire taking chi and slowly ruining the UUniverses.
Dai Shi: I'll learn to rise above being another Kai. I figured that if I only limit myself to those that deserve it, I won't suffer any problems.
Chicken: One problem, lady! Bawk, The League's a pretty numerous force. The minute you finish them off, if ever, you'll end up being corrupt enough that you'll lose sight of whatever misguided goal you made.
Dai Shi: Details, details, it doesn't matter to me. I'll still be happy that the Villain League is no more, and I'll see to it that I become the true authority of these UUniverses. Nobody's going to suffer as long as I'm around.
Croc: Dudette, that's evil territory. That proves you're no better than the Villain League. The UUniverses are pretty fine the way they are.
Dai Shi: Oh, so you're fine with the Villain League and other villains doing whatever the hell they want? What if they do something that's beyond ANY hero teams' control? I'll have to end them before it happens.
Chao: I still say this plan is destined to fail either by the Villain League or by the Shell Lodge Squad. They're certainly not going to let you get away with this.
Dai Shi: Oh, they'll never lay a hand on me. Not if they want some of their own members to stay alive and not as jade trophies. Now then, Ta Cha, give the command!
Ta Cha: Ants, take them away! (The ants did that as they knocked them out)
Dai Shi: (Chuckles) Who says I'm not a match for the Villain League? I've come too far to stand down. I will not let all that I have learned go to waste! If I don't do something about those Villain Leaguers, no one will! They must be put down permanently, no matter the cost! Ta Cha, commence with having your forces to "invite" more Kung Fu Masters across China! Then, for added measure... let's also gain control of the entire Valley. That will be bound to make the Panda aware that I have an interest for him.
Ta Cha: Oh, you have NO idea how much I like the idea of claiming the Valley while Mantis and his friends aren't looking. I am happy to oblige.

Chapter 5: Dai Shi Claims the Valley/A Panda Village Imperiled[]

The Following Morning...

Mr. Ping: (He was opening up his shop while Zeng stopped by) Ahh, Zeng, thank you for stopping by. I can't thank you enough for helping me repair my shop after I had some trouble from Mr. Sun Ying Moon.
Zeng: It's no trouble. The Jade Palace always comes to repair those victimized by the strong and corrupt.
Mr. Ping: Now, I can open my restaurant, and resume business as usual. (Screams were heard as Ping and Zeng went to see what was wrong, they both gasped when they saw that Ta Cha's army ants are attacking the Valley)
Zeng: (Squeaks cowardly) Th-th-th-th-those are Ta Cha's army ants!
Mr. Ping: Are you kidding me?!? First Sun Ying Moon, now Ta Cha? Can this get worse?!? (Earthquakes are felt as Pan Zing was seen)...And it just did.
Zeng: PA-PA-PA Pan Zing?!?
Mr. Ping: Since when was Pan Zing an ally of Ta Cha? (Screehes are heard as Xao and her hawks charged in and swiped at those that attempted to fight back against the ants)
Zeng: XAO?!?
Mr. Ping: Wait, the wife of that Kung Lao guy who joined the Jailbird Troupe? She's involved too? Is this another villain team up?
Zeng: I-I-I-I must warn the Dragon Warrior!
Mr. Ping: I'll come with you! I fear this might require more than just Kung Fu alone. (Ping and Zeng attempted to escape, but are intercepted by two squads of Ta Cha's ants) YAAHHH!! (Suddenly, a viper-shaped figure smacked them away, as it appeared to be Viper's father)
Mr. Ping: GRAND MASTER VIPER!!
Grand Master Viper: The scoundrels attacked my village! I came to help you get out of here. My family is already safely away from this chaos. You must warn the Dragon Warrior.
Zeng: B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-BUT WHAT ABOUT THESE ANTS?!?
Grand Master Viper: I'll hold them, Xao, and her hawks off. NOW GO! TAKE FLIGHT! (They did that as they flew off)
Xao: OH NO, YOU DON'T! (Tries to strike them down until Grand Master Viper incapacitates them down, breaking their wings)...OWCH!
Grand Master Viper: There! Now you won't be going anywhere for a while.
Pan Zing: HAH! You'd think you have crippled them for a while. (Does a chi healing technique on them that heals their wings)
Grand Master Viper:... Oh, boy- (Xao and the hawks incapacitate Grand Master Viper after throwing him clear into a tree as he is knocked unconscious).
Hawk #1: Now let's get those birds- (They were already gone)...SON OF A BITCH!!
Xao: I guess we fell for that one.
Hawk #1: Son of a BITCH!
Xao: SHUT UP AND SEARCH FOR THEM BEFORE THEY GET OUT OF RANGE!!!
???: Don't bother. (Dai Shi comes in)
Dai Shi: This is exactly how I want the Dragon Warrior to become aware.
Xao: I...know the idea is to have the Dragon Warrior know you're coming, but... shouldn't we have captured all the Kung Fu Masters by then?
Dai Shi: The Secret Panda Village is extremely far away, especially for flying creatures. It'll be a few days before they arrive, and we'll already have captured all the masters by then. So leave the overgrown ducks be.
Xao: Yes, Dai Shi! (Grand Master Viper quickly recovered from his injury)
Grand Master Viper:... I should've guessed you were behind this chaos, Dai Shi. Whatever it is you're planning, you will not be allowed to continue.
Dai Shi: I'm gonna continue all I like, you retired has-been. If you don't like it, then bite me!
Grand Master Viper:...Figuratively or literally?
Dai Shi: Pick one, d****-body! (Grand Master Viper was angry by that comment and charged, but Dai Shi quickly turned the spear into a war hammer to his quick shock and was smacked in the jaw by it. Grand Master Viper was sent across the Valley road, injured in the jaw)...
Grand Master Viper: (Coughs blood as Dai Shi and the ants approached him)... It may not have been my destiny to stop you... but it will belong to another.
Dai Shi: If I had a yuan for everytime I've been told that. You're lucky I'm generous enough to not let you die by your wounds. Mainly because... you, and every other master, are an importance to me. Pan, heal the fool, Ta Cha, disable him afterward. (Pan and Ta Cha nodded in obedience and proceeded to do that)
Grand Master Viper: The Dragon Warrior will- (He gets knocked out before he could say anything else)
Dai Shi:...(Chuckles) Well, now that that's taken care of, let's find the rest of the Kung Fu masters to complete our plan to bribe the Dragon Warrior!
Pan/Ta Cha: YES, MAM! (They left)

Secret Panda Village, a few days later...

Lord Shen: (He was still seen meditating)... Inner peace.... Inner Peace.... (A flapping sound was heard)...Uh, whoever's making that flapping sound, could you KINDLY quiet down?...Thank you...(Continues meditating)... Inner- (Zeng and Mr. Ping fell straight into the lake near him, interupting his concentration) Now what?
Ping: (The two surface and gasp for air) PLECH!! Mr. Shen!...We've come with bad news concerning the Valley!
Lord Shen:...Bad news in what variety?

Later...

Po/Mantis: TA CHA AND PAN ZING ARE WHAT?!?
Lord Shen: They told me that Ta Cha and Pan Zing were working with a wolf that...I was afraid was lost to me for a long time since I attacked that village.
Boss Wolf:...By God, you don't mean...
Lord Shen: Yes, Boss Wolf! I mean your sister, Dai Shi.
Icky: Wait, Boss Wolf has a sister?
Boss Wolf: It's...kind of a long story.

KFP-Animated Flashback

(Boss Wolf): When the two of us were young, we had gotten along greatly together just like we did with our other 5 siblings. We were serving the peacocks loyally, and Dai Shi had hoped that we would do great things together. But then came the day we attacked that panda village. (The genocide was seen)...Dai Shi was rather...disgusted at what Shen had done. And she was personally glad that Shen was banished. But the banishment of Shen wasn't enough. She knew why he did it, and blamed the Villain League for everything. So she abandoned the wolf guard, refusing to have any part of Shen's revenge scheme.

Present

Boss Wolf: I had no idea what happened with her afterwards. I thought she was lost and had a new life. But now I see that she's making good on her promise of revenge on the Villain League.
Po:...So your sister wants to destroy the Villain League because of what they did to Shen?
Monkey: THAT'S THE CRAZIEST THING I'VE EVER HEARD!!! No matter how strong she could possibly become, she could never be a match for all those Villain Leaguers! They'd end her in an instant!
Tigress: Mr. Ping, Zeng, did you know exactly what power Dai Shi had?
Zeng: Well, she was carrying some kind of magical weapon that could transform. And she seemed to glow in green energy.
Boss Wolf:...She mastered chi?!?
Tigress: Not just that, but I recognize that...a weapon that can transform!...No!...It can't be!...Could she be wielding...THE WEAPON OF MORPH WAO?!?
Po:...You mean the spear-like staff crafted centuries ago by the legendary Morph Wao, and wielded by the long-passed Master Moo?
Icky: (Scoffs)...Master Moo? Who knew a cow could kick ass with a weapon like that?
Po: Well...I don't think even with Ta Cha and Pan Zing at her side, she could never hope to destroy the Villain League. They have far too many powerful members.
Mr. Ping: That's the thing. She knows even they and that fancy weapon aren't enough.... That's why she wants you to teach her chi so she can use that awful chi move Kai used to turn the Leaguers into jade jewels to keep as trophies.
Po: Well, is she up a creek with no paddle. I tend to have a strict policy about teaching bad guys chi and Kung Fu. I don't want to end up making my own Tai Lungs or Kais. And heaven forbid me if I end up making another Shen.... No offense.
Lord Shen: None taken too seriously.
Zeng: That's why... she's kidnapping other Kung Fu Masters. She knows you won't sacrifice their life for the UUniverses.
Po: Ohhhhh, and she's VEEERY correct, because it would break me if those awesome masters would fall. But it would suck even more if I let Dai Shi become more powerful. Not just that, but we have to consider the possibility that the League actually DOES lose to her. She'll end up being an even worse Kai than...well...the original Kai. Not to mention if she ends up getting corrupted into becoming yet the latest favorite of Mang's. She'll end up being a worse Dark Cynder than Cynder! No offense.
Cynder: None taken.
Po: Either way, it's gonna end sucky for everyone.
???: And you wanna know what's worse? (Shi-Te was seen)
Shi-Te:... I'm afraid that means that she-wolf is gonna come here to our village. And you wanna know what else? She probably planned to make her move when (points to Shen) HE arrived to our village. Now, I'm nice enough to not accuse him of still being evil and that he's working with Dai Shi considering the fact he made legit effort and that even I'M more realistic than that, but still.... it counts as him making some form of new trouble, indirect or not, being needed for a new villain's uprising AND the risk of her coming to our village. I'm afraid it compromises your repentance. And I was close to actually even liking you, too.
Lord Shen:... Then I want to make stopping Dai Shi a new part of me making repentance. She was my mistake, and I want to correct it.
Shi-Te: Not that I doubt your ability, but Dai Shi is clearly not like her brother. Espeically thanks to two powerful bugs, and a previously-lost great weapon. Also, it's too late to change the current deal.
Lord Shen: Then let's make a new one based on that, but with the added addition of stopping Dai Shi.
Shi-Te:... Why... are you so determined to even help us? You didn't know what it was like to lose someone you cared about. At least not before you ruined us.
Lord Shen:... I did, actually. Are you familiar with the fallen Uniter Princess Shu Mulan?
Shi-Te: Shu Mulan? YOU knew Shu Mulan? My parents only told me stories until they eventually stopped when they heard something happened to her.
Lord Shen: That's because your parents were there when she sacrificed herself to prevent the Mothron Emperor from claiming the Uniter Keyblade.
Shi-Te: YOU MEAN SHE'S DE... SHE'S DEAA... SHE'S NOT ALIVE ANYMORE?!?
Lord Shen:... It depends on how you look at it. But for the most part, being in Kingdom Hearts is close to being truly dead. So if you were aggressive to me because you assumed I didn't know what real loss was like prior to my mistakes that MANG made me do, then consider yourself corrected. Did you think I would ever hurt your parents willingly after they gave me kind words to help me overlook Shu's sacrifice? Corruption was what took your parents. It just used Mang and myself as their bodies to do it. By all means, you're free to be as resentful to me as you want, but at least give me a chance to prove my intent for redemption is more legit than you wanted to think. Your family would've wanted that.
Shi-Te: (He sighs)... Very well. New deal. Defeat Dai Shi as further proof you have changed. But be made aware, not only would failure lead to you never coming back, but you would also have to live with the fact that another mistake you made will haunt you for the rest of eternity.
Lord Shen:... Then that means I can't take on Dai Shi alone. Prehistoric one?
Icky: I'm on it. Trouble rears it's ugly head... (Brings out the communicater)... I'm gonna phone home.

Dragon Temple

Shifu: (He was seen meditating as he then saw a vision of Dai Shi bribing Po with the Furious Five and the other Kung Fu Masters, and then they get turned to jade) (He gasps as he collapsed)...Oh, no!...(He heads out as he finds the Lodgers talking to Icky on the communicator) Guys, I had a vision! Po and the others might be in grave...(He noticed them with the communicator)...Oh...you already know, huh?
SpongeBob: Yep. They've told us everything that's going on. Apparently, some sister of Boss Wolf wants to destroy the Villain League and use the Kung Fu masters to bribe Po into teaching her more in chi than she has already.
Icky: Yeah, so we might need your help in case she ever gets through with this.
SpongeBob: Well, then consider help on it's way! We'll be there as soon as we can!
Sandy: Yeah, and hopefully this will prove to the pandas that Shen has changed for the better.
Icky: Great. We'll see you soon! Icky out! (They ended transmission)
Soothsayer: (Sighs) Dai Shi means well, but while her heart's in the right place, her mind is not.
Spyro: No kidding. She'll only end up becoming the League's latest weapon against us.
Shifu: Or worse... She'll end up becoming a new Kai.
Skipper: Then let's go put a stop to that she-wolf! Opertaion: Jade Wolf is a go.
Private: Oh, I like that one! That's a good one!
Skipper: Less chant, more van! (They took off in the van at top speed)

Secret Panda Village

Icky:...Alright, they're on their way.
Lord Shen: Good! Dai will surely not see that coming. (Icky tries to speak) And yes, I am aware that karma might rip us apart at that statement, but we're talking about a plan that's destined to fail.
Tigress: It would be unwise to leave this to chance. We need to prepare ourselves for this attack.
Po: Hopefully, the pandas have enough skills to participate in an epic plan of epic proportionate epicness.
Fidget: You just said 'epic' three times.
Lord Shen: Hey, I'm sure the panda knows what he's doing.
Shi-Te: So...where does Shen play in this role again?
Lord Shen: Oh, I'll get a role alright. I'll surely get the most important role, and that's confronting Dai Shi and doing what I can to stop her.
Shi-Te: On your own!
Mantis:...Are you sure about that? You sure he can take on a foe almost as powerful as Kai by himself?
Shi-Te: Well, this is HIS test. I'm sure he's got this in the bag.
Lord Shen: I still need help. But if anyone's going to help me out of this, it's Boss Wolf! He's just as guilty of the panda genocide as I am, plus it's his sister we're talking about.
Shi-Te:...Fair enough, he can assist.
Po: Alright. Let's get this over with.
Viper: You sure we can actually deal with a threat like this in time?
Po:... I can't necessarily say for sure, but I'm optimistic that we can at least not let ourselves be pushovers.

Chapter 6: Dai Shi's Forces' Advancement/A Panda Village Full of Surprises/Dai Shi's Bribery[]

Later...

A montage of the Pandas preparing for battle as well as Dai Shi's forces advancing are seen.

Kai is Closer

Go to 2:30 for the montage music.

Po:...Alright, I've got a plan all figured out! And to make sure nobody eats any part of the map, I've used pieces made out of wood and mud. Now, here's the plan. I will be isolated in the most secure place in the village, which is this cave hidden behind the waterfall. All groups will be charged with defending me so Dai Shi cannot make her ultimatum. Group A, which consists of Shen and Boss Wolf, will be here at the entrance of the village ready to confront Dai Shi. If they fail at their first try, then they will assist Group B, which consists of the Furious Five, Mei Mei, Sum and Dim and 5 other pandas, to guard the further entrance to the Village. Dim, Sum, you handle Xao and her hawks with your aerial belly gongs, but don't expect her to be an easy target to strike.
Dim/Sum: You got it, Po! Jinx! Double jinx!
Po: And Mei Mei, see if you can do what you can to handle Pan Zing. He should be big enough for your nun-chucks to strike.
Mei Mei: I'll do what I can for you, sweetie!
Po:...Anyway, Group C is Icky, Iago, Fidget and Shi-Te, who will watch out for any sign of the forces' arrival, and will give the signal when they are spotted to begin the plan. Group D consists of Ku Ku, Meng Meng, Shuai Shuai, Bao, Lei Lei, and 12 other pandas, which will guard my location on all sides. You kids know what to do with the fireworks, turn any ant swarms into charcoal and make them into the most delicious ant-covered lollipop you- (The panda kids were grossed out by this) Okay, okay, just don't do that, just blow them up.
Bao: Yeah, we're going to fire-crack them up!
Po:...You are so cute. Anyway, The rest of us will fight freely against Dai Shi. Our main goal is to protect me for as long as you can until the Lodgers show up to finish the job.
Icky: I have to admit, Po, this is pretty genius of you. Never thought you to be a genius in strategy.
Lord Shen: Actually, I came up with most of it.
Iago: I'm just confused at why some of the pandas here have the same first and last name. I mean, we don't call Po 'Po Po', so-
DBZ Abridged Popo: Hiiiiii! (The Lodgers screamed)
Iago: OH, GOD, HE SCARED THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS OUT OF US!!!
Icky: WOULD YOU GET OUT OF HERE?!? (DBZ Abridged Popo left with a poof)... These Abridged jokes are getting out of hand. Can't we just exile them to the Memeverse like we did so many others?
Crane: Well, they may share the same dimention as memes, but by all grounds, they technically aren't considered true memes, they're just running gags. We can't exile them there unless they're memes.
Po: Anyway, you all have your positions, let's try not to make ANY mistakes. (The pandas cheered) Alright, let's get ready to dish out some thunder!

5 hours later...

Icky: (He, Iago, Fidget and Shi-Te are seen in lookout positions)... It SUCKS that I can't get a signal out here.
Iago: Well, the UUniversal Radio and Space Transmissions have yet to install any router space stations in this territory. This sector of the DreamWorks Universe is rather clouded with interference, and they have yet to clear it up so that this universe's Central UURST Station can interface with any new router stations that are built in this sector.
Icky: (Sighs) For a company that actually allows for Wi-Fi IN SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE, it sucks ass when it comes to installing their silly broadcast stations.
Fidget: Rome wasn't built in a day, as they say. Building router stations is like building a spaceship. It takes a LOT of resources, power, and money. And space IS a widely-undiscovered place which has specific locations identified by numbered coordinates. Installing these things take a LOT of time and patience.
Icky: Still, I wish they could've done it sooner.
Shi-Te: Guys, do you see Dai Shi's forces yet?
Icky: We checked 5 minutes ago, and they weren't there. But for the sake of all of us, we'll take another look. (The four looked again, and this time they saw Dai Shi's forces in the distance)... Wow, that is a LOT of ants!
Iago: I know. I never knew an ant colony could be THAT big. How do they fit that whole colony inside an ant hill-
Shi-Te: JUST GIVE THE SIGNAL, YOU JIBBERING OAF!!!
Icky: Okay, fine! You don't have to be a d*** about it!
Shi-Te: I'm being a d*** about it FOR MY PEOPLE!!! (Icky blows the horn, alerting all the heroes)
Po:...It's time! I'd better get going! Whatever you do, do NOT let Dai Shi know where I am! (The pandas nodded in agreement as Po head out through the waterfall in a deep cave)
Tigress: ALRIGHT, EVERYONE, ASSUME GUARDING STANCES NOW!! MOVE, MOVE, MOVE, MOVE!!! (The pandas scrambled and got ready)
Lord Shen: Come on, BW, let's get them! (They head out to the entrance)

Village Entrance

Dai Shi: (They saw the entrance)...How in the world do we get up there?
Ta Cha: Maybe there's some kind of elevator up there.
Xao: I'll go check. Hawks, move out! (They flew upward)...YEP, IT'S AN ELEVATOR ALRIGHT!!
Hawk #2: WOW, I BET THESE FATSOS ARE TOO LAZY TO GO UP SOME STAIRS!
Hawk #3: WHAT FATSO ISN'T? (They laughed)
Xao: YOU TWO JUST SHUT UP!
Dai Shi: IS THERE A WAY TO ACTIVATE IT UP THERE?!?
Pan Zing: Oh, there's a lever down here, actually.
Dai Shi:...Oh...why didn't I notice that?
Pan Zing: Because it looks like a stick-
Dai Shi: Shut up! (Pulls the lever as the elevator comes down)...Alright, let's get a move on. (They went up the elevator to see Xao and the hawks incapacitated)...What the hell?
???: Looking for someone, Dai? (Shen and Boss Wolf arrived)
Dai Shi:...Shen...Wag.
Lord Shen:...Wag?
Boss Wolf:...Yeah, that's my real name.
Lord Shen:...(Scoffs and laughs)
Boss Wolf: OH, HERE WE GO!!! IT'S NOT THAT FUNNY!! Besides, we have a job to do!
Lord Shen:...Okay then...Wag. (Scoffs and laughs again)
Boss Wolf:...DAI, WHY DID YOU HAVE TO EMBARRASS ME?!? THIS IS WHY I PREFER TO BE CALLED BOSS WOLF!!
Dai Shi: Oh, it's so cute, though. Anyway, I prefer it if you get out of my way. I'm here for the Dragon Warrior.
Lord Shen: (After stopping his laughter) Well, too bad, Dai, you're not getting to him no matter what! Plus, we know what you're trying to do, and this is just a lost cause. The Villain League is not your responsibility as it is ours. Those guys have been fighting us so much, they feel embarrassed by us.
Boss Wolf: In fact, they once had recordings of our embarrassing moments until we blew them up and had Hermes show us THEIRS. We turn them to complete jokes, so you pretty much look mediocre now.
Dai Shi: Oh, you think you're so cute!
Boss Wolf: BITCH, I'M ADORABLE! And this is coming from the one who embarrassed me from my 'cute' name.
Dai Shi: I WAS BEING COY, YOU MORON!!! (Shrugs) You start to annoy me as much as we did when we were young pups.
Lord Shen: Well, your heart is in the right place, but your mind is in the wrong place. You have no idea how powerful the Villain League is. And even with the Weapon of Morph Wao and the chi you've learned throughout the years, you're still just paperweight to them.
Dai Shi: Oh, I won't attack them alone. But don't expect me to tell you about how I'm gonna do it. Now get out of my way, because I'm not afraid to hurt my brother and my former master if I have to.
Lord Shen: Well, too bad. We can't let you do this. So go ahead and get through us if you can. We're WIIIIDE open!
Dai Shi:... Hmmph! So, be it. Ta Cha, Pan Zing, I want you two and the ants to heal the birds and search for Po while I... contend to my past.
Ta Cha: One big fat panda, coming up! (Pan Zing used his chi to heal Xao and her hawks as they lifted up the entire Army Ant army, Ta Cha and himself past Shen and Boss Wolf and at the front porch of the Panda Village. Dai Shi spun the spear quick enough to become two dual blades)
Dai Shi:... Ready to see how much my combat improved, brother and former master?
Lord Shen: Oh, we shall see about that. (He and Boss Wolf battle-cried and charged as Dai Shi did the same as the two began to fight, clashing)

Panda Village

Ta Cha: (Pan Zing and Ta Cha lead the ants around the village while Xao patrolled the skies) Ohhh... Surprisingly fertile ground for something on top of a mountain. We can make a lot of anthills here.
Pan Zing: Something does not feel right, my queen.... This village is quiet.... Too quiet.
Ta Cha: Oh, I'm sure they're just hiding, darling.
Pan Zing: Well, let's make sure of that. Besides, they're no match for an entire army of army ants. We'd overwhelm them no matter how many of them there are.
Li Shan: (They waited as the army ants searched the place)...NOW! (The pandas used their chi to touch the ground and send a yellow shockwave across the army ants and squish a fair amount of them)
Dim: (Smells the air) OH, BLECH! That weird ant smell is everywhere!
Sum: Let's just kick their butts! BELLY...
Dim: GONG!! (They launched themselves from their hampers, and actually managed to take out a surprise-struck Xao as she fell unconscious, and Crane and Cynder took out the hawks)
Dai Shi: (Saw this)... Seriously-? (Shen smacked her) OOF! (The pandas continued fighting the army ants, as some pandas went into a rolling stampede and ended up rolling over some of the army ants, spinning and rolling and running over more of them)
Army Ant #1: LIVING BOULDERS!!! WATCH OUT- (He gets squashed)
Grandma: (Smells the air) Ick, ant smell!
Army Ant #2: (They get on top of a tree as they begun setting up their archers) Let's see them avoid THIS! (Suddenly, the tree shook as the Hugging Panda hugged the tree and took it down as the ants screamed and hit the ground)
Army Ant #3: ASSEMBLE LIFE-SIZE ATTACK FORMATION! (The ants climbed onto each other and formed a large attack structure that shape-shifted itself into attacking several pandas until a familiar ribbon coiled around them and spun the ants, spreading them across the area, revealed to have been done by Mei Mei)
Mei Mei: Get ready to dance, WITH DANGER!
Army Ant #4: GET HER! (Mei Mei used her nun-chucks to crush the army-ant teamwork structures one-by-one)
Bao: Let's give these ant meanies a little sizzle! (The panda kids cheered as they began kicking firecrackers across the area, taking out several army ant-infested areas)
Army Ant #5: IT'S RAINING FIRECRACKERS!!!
Army Ant #6: LOOK OUT- (He gets scorched by a firecracker)...Ow!
Ta Cha: (Seeing her army ants getting beaten, chuckles) Good, but not good enough. Pan, would you kindly take care of them?
Pan Zing: Gladly, my liege! (He causes an earthquake that shakes the pandas off their feet)
Mei Mei: (She flips around out of control) YAI-YAI-YAI-YAI-YAI-YAI!!! (She falls to the ground tangled in her ribbon)
Bao: (Cynder was able to save the Panda kids before they could get hurt by their firecrackers)
Hugging Panda: (The earthquake caused him to accidentally hit himself in the groin with the tree he was hugging)...Ow! (He fell to the ground)
Tigress: Oh, crap, forgot Pan could do that now thanks to Dai.
Monkey: How are we going to protect Po with these kinds of conditions?
Mantis: I think I'll take care of Pan and Ta. Do whatever you can to stall the army ants and don't let them find Po's hiding spot! (He jumps off)
Ta Cha: (They both watch as the army ants formed even bigger structures to fight against the pandas)...(Chuckles) Did they think they would be prepared for a colony of army ants? Did they think there would be only a few average-sized members?
Pan Zing: I'd say so, because they're losing greatly. (The pandas continued to fight regardless of the seismic conditions) Allow me to-
???: HEY! (Mantis arrives)
Ta Cha: Well, well, Master Mantis. We meet again.
Pan Zing: For the last time, I assure you.
Mantis: Fight us as much as you want, you're not getting Po!
Ta Cha: We'll see about that. Pan, if you will?
Pan Zing: (Shakes the ground again as Mantis could hardly keep balance, and Pan then kicked him into a wall)
Ta Cha: Alright, Mantis, time to be as limp as a training dummy! (She tries to use the Pressure Tap on him, but he dodges in time, and kicks Ta Cha into a wall on her large abdomen) OOOOHHHHHH!!!... Right in the plump baby-maker!
Mantis: (He grabs Ta Cha and throws her into Pan)... Had enough yet?
Ta Cha: You wish, Mantis! (She got off of Pan, and the two attacked together as Mantis ended up grabbing Pan, and used him as a shield against Ta Cha's Pressure Tap, causing Pan to be affected and limp)... PAN!!!
Mantis: Give it up, Ta Cha! I beat you many times, I can do it again.
Ta Cha: But this time, I've improved on my tactics. (She leaped up and flipped multiple times in the air rapidly and aimed to stomp Mantis into the ground. Mantis kicked a bowl straight into Ta Cha as it smacked into her. The bowl shattered as Ta Cha judo-chopped through it, aerial charged at Mantis, multi-quick-flipped and entered into a kick stance.)
Mantis: (He caught her in his graspers, and aerial-spun her around and then threw her into the ground)
Ta Cha: OOF!!
Mantis: How's that for 'improved tactics'?
Ta Cha: Don't flatter yourself, Mantis! I have yet to show my full proficiency!
Mantis: Well, frankly, I just don't see it! Not to mention your army ants are starting to get trampled. (They saw that the pandas were using their chi to brush off and kill the army ants)
Ta Cha: NO! NO, NO, NO, NO!!! FOR GOD'S SAKES, EVERYONE, THROW A F****** PUNCH!!! (The army ants then began to form a wall and surround the pandas, then started to cover them up with each other and bite them in different areas)...Now THAT'S more like it!
Mantis: (Kicks towards them until Ta Cha grabs him and throws him into the ground) OOF! (Ta Cha finally uses the Pressure Tap on him as he was weakened and limp)...Ow!...Right in my every weak spot!
Ta Cha: ANTS, get Mantis to Dai Shi. He'll be as useful as any other Kung Fu Master we have. (The army ants took Mantis away)

Village Entrance

Lord Shen: (Throws blades at Dai Shi, but Dai Shi uses her dual baldes to reflect them, then transforms them into a javelin, throwing it at Shen as he dodges, and in slow motion, grabs it and throws it back at her as she catches it with only a small scratch)... Had enough yet, bitch?
Dai Shi: Hmmph, racist much?
Lord Shen: That's not racist, it's species-ist, there's a difference. And besides, I don't mean 'bitch' as in female dog... For the most part... I meant that in the term that insults a female.
Dai Shi: Then that makes you sexist.
Lord Shen: Trust me that I am not! I am merely using it as an insult to demoralize you as an individual that has nothing to do with the gender or species you are.
Dai Shi: Let's not waste our energy with anymore talk! (Turns the weapon into the firecracker launcher and launches fireworks at Shen as he ran avoiding them)
Lord Shen: THIS, FEELS, VERY IRONIC, SOMEHOW!!
Boss Wolf: (Hammers Dai Shi in the face as she falls face-first into snow)... That's for all the times you embarrassed and annoyed me! And I do mean EVERY ONE OF THEM! I mean, don't get me wrong, I don't hate you as a sister for them, but you being a villain just kinda gives me an excuse to finally confront you with our problems as siblings while being as physical as I like it.
Dai Shi: (Got out of the snow)... Hmmph! Typical thing for you to say, Wag.
Lord Shen: (Scoffs)
Boss Wolf: Can you PLEASE not bring that name back into thi-
Dai Shi: WAG!!! (Lord Shen laughed harder, and while he was distracted, Dai Shi turned the weapon into a spear and tried to stab Shen)
Boss Wolf: (Threw his hammer at her as it hit her in the foot)
Dai Shi: AAAAAOOOOOOOOWWWWWW!! (She fell to the ground clumsily before the Weapon could hit Shen) OW, OW, OOOOWWWW!!! YOU DOG!!!
Boss Wolf: (Slaps her across the face) THAT was for when you tricked our parents into thinking I bit you by faking it! (Slaps her again) And THAT was for calling me 'Wagtail' in front of our school! (Slaps) And THAT was for just recently trying to hurt the peacock that treated you like his daughter!
Dai Shi: (Bit his leg as he dog-yelped) And THAT was for eating all my dog treats that Autumn Festival ago! (Kicks him in the crotch) And THAT was for embarrassing me during that play at school! (Kicks him to the ground)... And THAT was for the many times you threw dog biscuits at me in front of the school! See? Not so glamorous dealing with our relationship problems so physically like tha- (Boss Wolf interrupted her by throwing a dog biscuit in her face like she referenced)... (Growls)
Lord Shen:... I have to admit that's kinda funny!
Boss Wolf: Funnier than my real name?
Lord Shen: Hell no, that's funnier! But it's a close second!
Dai Shi: ENOUGH OF THIS!! (Turns her weapon into the firecracker launcher and fires fireworks at them as they dodged)

Panda Village

Viper: (She confronted Ta Cha and a restored Pan Zing) I heard what happened to my father! I won't let you people get away with this! I'll avenge his honor, Mantis', and the other masters by being the one who stops you two.
Pan Zing: Then let us see if it is your destiny to stop us, Young Mistress Viper. Test your might on us.
Viper: (She attacked until Ta Cha thought quick, grappled and smashed her around, and then used the Pressure Tap on her, weakening her)... Owch!
Ta Cha: Too slow. (Chuckles)
Monkey: YOU GET AWAY FROM HER- (Pan Zing shaked the ground and Monkey was thrown off-balance, and Ta Cha used the Pressure Tap on him)...Ohhh, my everywhere!
Ta Cha: Come on, I deserve a challenge!
Monkey: YOU'RE TOO GOOD FOR A CHALLENGE!!!
Ta Cha: Shut up! (Smacks Monkey across the face)
Tigress: (She and Crane attacked, jumping before Pan Zing shook the ground, and while Crane caught Pan with his talon, Tigress was grappled by the tail by Ta Cha)... WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, STOP, I, THINK, I, GOTTA, HAIRBALL! (He hacked one out as it hit a panda child)
Panda Child: EWWWWWW!! (Wipes it off and dunks his head in the water gurgling)
Ta Cha: (Throws Tigress into a house as it collapses on top of her)...
Crane: TIGRESS!- (Ta Cha used the Pressure Tap on him as he collapsed and let Pan go)
Pan: Can she survive that?
Ta Cha: Oh, she has enough durability to handle that. (Tigress crawls out of the rubble weakened)...See?
Tigress:...(Barely gets up and weakly attacks the two as they teased and dodged her until Ta Cha used the Pressure Tap on her)
Ta Cha:...Where's the Dragon Warrior?
Tigress: I'll never talk! NEVER!
Ta Cha: Well, too bad for you. You've already lost. Ants, take them away. (The ants took away the rest of the Furious Five)

Village Entrance

Lord Shen: (He and Dai Shi dueled with their signature weapons as Dai Shi turned her weapon into twin sai, and tossed Shen's blade away from him, transformed them into a spear, kicked Shen down, and held him down with the spear)...
Dai Shi: Alright, Shen! Enough is enough! Tell me where the Dragon Warrior is and stop prolonging this. My forces will get to him no matter how prepared you are!
Lord Shen: If you're so damn smart, why don't you figure it out? I don't want to insult your intelligence by granting hints.
Dai Shi:... I, have a strange feeling of being complimented and insulted at the same time. (Boss Wolf slammed the hammer onto Dai Shi's tail) AAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!!
Boss Wolf: AND THAT WAS FOR TURNING INTO A BITCH!
Dai Shi: (Her tail was pumping in pain)... Oh, you are so punched, Wag!
Boss Wolf: If you call me by my real name one more time, I'm going to shove that weapon of yours so far though your va-
Dai Shi: Wag!
Boss Wolf:... Okay, bitch, you asked for it! I'm gonna- (Dai Shi turned the weapon into a war hammer as he smacked Boss Wolf in the face with it) OOF! (Boss Wolf fell to the ground seeing Pos knocking Boss Wolves into signs, and repeatedly saying 'So many signs!')
Dai Shi: Chew on THAT, chow-chow!
Lord Shen: (Leaps towards Dai Shi as she started to display her chi abilities) OH, S***- (Dai Shi punches Lord Shen in the chest) DAUAGH! (The yelp echoed as Lord Shen fell to the ground weak)... Ouch!
Dai Shi: KO, I win! So... Had enough yet, Shen? Because there's plenty more where that came from.
Lord Shen: Never! Nev- (Dai Shi stepped on his face) FOOMPH!
Dai Shi: (Turns the weapon into a spear and points it at him) Now... Last chance, where is the Dragon Warrior?
Lord Shen:... (Growls angrily, and starts to burst in yellow chi energy)... I'LL SHOW YOU, YOU DUMB MUTT!!! (Takes out a big cannon)
Dai Shi:... Where did you get that cannon?
Lord Shen: Your mother!
Boss Wolf:... You're referring to MY mother too, sir! (Coughs)
Lord Shen: Doesn't matter. Let's see you withstand THIS! (Lights the cannon as it fires at Dai Shi, but she manages to catch it)... What?
Dai Shi: Oh, did you think I wouldn't see THAT coming? I've found inner peace LONG before you became corrupted! Your precious projectiles can't work on me!
Lord Shen:... Wait, I thought inner peace was supposed to be a good guy thing. And the whole revenge against the Villain League thing technically makes you an anti-villain at best.
Dai Shi: (Realizes) Then... Why have I been able to hold this for so long?
Lord Shen: It's probably the chi that's helping you do that, but... Yeah, it won't do that as long as inner peace can, so it's bound to go off at any minute.
Dai Shi:... Well, fu- (The projectile exploded as the blast ravaged the area knocking Shen and Boss Wolf onto the slippery ice)
Lord Shen: (Coughs and tries to keep his balance, but he eventually slipped due to being too weak) WHOA! (He fell to the ground sliding, and he and Boss Wolf slid to the tip of the ice sheet)... PLEASE tell me that blast affected her as we- (His eyes cartoonishly engorged as he saw that Dai Shi protected herself with a chi aura)
Dai Shi:... (Chuckles)... At least that weakened you, Shen! So what're you going to do now?
Lord Shen: Haven't I already said it would insult your intelligence to give you hints? You're so smart, you figure it out.
Dai Shi: (Chuckles) That was what always impressed me when I was younger: your snarky sophisticated wit. But in this case, it motivates me to really hurt you badly. (The two were too weak to have the strength to get up on the icy sheet)... You wanna redeem yourself? Why don't you say hi to Master Thundering Rhino? (Prepares to strike)
???: WE CAME IN LIKE A WRECKING BALL!!
Dai Shi: Now what?!? (She looked and gasped as she saw Shi-Te tied to some rope being swung at her by Icky, Iago and Fidget all doing Tarzan screams) WHEN DID THOSE FOUR GET THE TIME TO- (The Shi-Te wrecking ball smacked Dai Shi into the wall of the mountain)... OHHH, RIGHT IN THE NOSE! (She falls) OOF!
Icky: HA-HA! YA GOT WRECKED, SON!!!
Shi-Te: If memory serves, she was a female, so shouldn't it be "You got wrecked, daughter"?
Icky: It doesn't tend to slide off the tongue as easily as using "son".
Shi-Te: Yeah, but she's clearly a SHE, so shouldn't it be more genderly correct to-
Icky: OH, WHO CARES?!? At least that bitch is done and won't be going anywhere for a while.
Lord Shen:...So...how are the others doing?
Fidget: Not well, actually. The pandas are getting their asses kicked by those army ants! The Furious Five have been captured, and it's only a matter of time before they find Po!
Lord Shen: THEN WE'D BETTER DO SOMETHING!!! (They ran back into the village)

Panda Village

Ta Cha: (The pandas were eventually surrounded by army ants as Ta Cha and Pan Zing stood and watched laughing in seeming victory) And here I thought this was gonna be impossible. You think the infamous Lord Shen would've made a strategy that would already have made him a victor.
Pan Zing: Do not let yourself get drunk on victory, my queen. This is but one of many tricks he has. For all we know, he could suddenly surprise us with- (Suddenly, several army ants are sent flying. Ta Cha and Pan Zing looked behind them)... Just as I suspected.
Lord Shen: (He stood over the still knocked-out Furious Five freed from the army ants) Thank goodness I took prior time to learn this from Shifu. (He used his chi to start reversing the disabling of the Furious Five and they were battle-ready again)
Mantis: TA CHA, PAN, YOU, ME, MY FRIENDS, REMATCH!!
Ta Cha: Aw, no fair!! I already beat you all fair and square.
Pan Zing: Then let us defeat them fairly once again. Then we shall avenge Dai Shi's honor by stopping you ourselves, peacock! (Pan Zing and Ta Cha charged as did the Five. Ta Cha attempted to do the same move again, but this time, Mantis glowed in chi, surprising Ta Cha)
Mantis: LET'S SEE HOW YOU LIKE BEING DISABLED, YOU FAT BITCH!!
Ta Cha: YOU LEARNED MY TECHNIQUE?!? HOW?!? IT TAKES YEARS TO LEARN THAT TECHNIQUE!! OOGWAY NEVER EVEN HAD A CHANCE TO SHOW YOU!!
Mantis: I did it like Po: I figured it out. So, as he would say, Ska-Doosh! (He disabled Ta Cha with her own technique used against her in great irony as she fell down)
Ta Cha: (Stiffed) So... This... Is what it feels like. Irony, you cruel mistress!
Pan Zing: MY QUEEN!! (Growls)... Your adaptability, while impressive, has only sealed your fates! I WILL USE MY OWN TECHNIQUE TO DESTROY THE ENTIRE MOUNTAIN, AS RETAILIATION FOR THIS INSULT!! (Jumps into the air) AND EVEN IF MY OWN LIFE IS ENDED IN THE PROCESS, SO BE IT!!
Mantis:... He's all yours, Crane.
Crane: (He smiles as he flew up)... CHI WING CLAP OF HEROISM! (Claps his wings and causes a chi wave) KA-KAAAAAAAAAAAAW!! (This plowed over several army ants as Pan Zing gasped)
Pan Zing: BY THE DRAGON GODS!! (Pan Zing was hit by the wave and was sent falling back down)
Mantis: (As Crane flew back down)... Eh, still gotta work on the names of your moves. (Crane rolls his eyes as the Furious Five all rose up to confront the falling Pan Zing)
Pan Zing:... How?... HOW?!?... HOW DID YOU MASTER SUCH DIFFICULT CHI TECHNIQUES THAT WOULD EVEN TAKE ME YEARS TO LEARN, OR EVEN CREATE A NEW ONE?!?
Tigress: We'll give you five-in-a-half reasons. The sole one: Po's a real good teacher. But now the five. ONE... (She kick-flipped Pan Zing straight to Viper)
Viper:... TWO... (She twirls around Pan Zing in a ribbon-dancing style and sends Pan Zing flying straight into Monkey)
Monkey:... THREE... (He smacked Pan Zing with his staff and straight into Crane)
Crane:... FOUR... (He flapped his wings and used the wind to send Pan Zing right into Mantis)
Mantis:... FIVE!! (Mantis, in slow-motion, does the Pressure Tap on Pan Zing, and then smacks him straight into the defeated queen herself, causing a small earthquake that the quick-confidence-losing army ants felt. Pan Zing was breathing heavily as the Furious Five formed around him)
Tigress: To put it simply, Pan Zing... (The Five dramatically posed)
Furious Five: WE ARE THE FURIOUS FIVE!!
Mantis: And THAT'S how you do a cool talking-in-unison thing. (The Pandas began to corral the army ants into a giant ball as Icky, Iago, and Fidget quickly kicked them into a giant jar)
Lord Shen: SUCCESS!! And we didn't even needed the others help.
Shi-Te: WHERE IN THE WORLD DID YOU GET THAT JAR?!?
Icky: Contrivance, that's where.
Li Shan: WE WON EVERYONE!! (Everyone in the village cheered)
Pan Zing: (Stiffed)... (Laughs weakly as Mantis looked at Pan Zing in concern and confusion)
Mantis: Uh, I may not be an expert in bad guys, but... You're not suppose to be happy you lost.
Pan Zing: Well, maybe if this was a real battle, then yes, I would've been dishonored in this. But... The battle you fought is both a test to your own abilities, of which I must say, Dai Shi is most certainly right about picking the panda, and... It's a distraction. We have EVEN more ants than the ones trapped in the jar. The ones you defeated were just assigned to test your skills. Dai Shi tooked the time to study the location of the Panda Village, AND SHE ALREADY KNEW ABOUT YOUR LITTLE CAVE AND FIGURED YOU WOULD USE IT TO HIDE THE PANDA!!
Lord Shen:... I knew something was off about her asking questions when she prefers to rely on herself!
Icky:... Clever girl!
Tigress: Then that means... PO!! (Po was tossed out of the cave through the waterfall by even more army ants as Xao and her hawks were able to play pinball with him and knock him into the jar, shattering it and freeing the other army ants, who quickly regained their confidance and surrounded the group)
Dai Shi: (She came in laughing as Xao and the hawks flew in) I am impressed on how powerful your teaching skills are, Panda. I was right to have considered you after all. (Restores Ta Cha and Pan Zing to normal) But onto business. Ta Cha? (Ta Cha snapped her clawed fingers, as even more army ants burst from the ground, carrying every Kung Fu master of the valley, as well as the current Army Ants re-capturing the Five)
Po: GUYS!!
Dai Shi: Your power has proved it's worth, future master. Now train me, or I will be forced to train myself on your friends and the other Kung Fu masters! And be warned, self-training tends to lead to irreversible mistakes. I might not be able to even bring them back as jaded zombies.
Tigress: Po, please, choose the safety of the UUniverses over us!
Chao: Do not let our lives be worth sacrificing the UUniverses to a new Kai in the hands of the League! Oogway would understand your sacrifice!
Ox: So would Master Rhino.
Dai Shi: I'm waiting, master.... I know it would hurt to go against your 'policy' against teaching someone like me, but it would hurt you even more to sacrifice your friends and the other Kung Fu masters. Ask yourself this: "Do I want to protect the same group of people that harmed my people through Shen, and sacrificed my friends and heroes, over a group of demon worshippers?" I know you well enough Po. You are not Oogway. You would never sacrifice a few lives over the UUniverses.
Po:... (Sighs) You're right, Dai.... I'm not Oogway.
Tigress: PO, NO- (The army ants covered her mouth, as well as those of the other Kung Fu Masters and the Five as they looked on concerned as Dai smiled)
Po:...I'll...I'll...I'll-
???: I DON'T THINK SO, DAI SHI!!
Dai Shi: AW, WHAT THE F*** NOW?!? (The van flew in as the horn played 'El Curacha')
Lord Shen: Huh? Just in time.
SpongeBob: STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING IMMEDIATELY, DAI SHI!
Dai Shi: Stay back, you fools, or these masters are jaded! You fire a single laser, I see to it that these masters are not only jaded, but shattered by your lasers! SO STAY, BACK?!
Merlin: Careful, Dai Shi, I'm sure you know what we can do.
Phil: Yeah. Back down, or you'll be as embarrassed by us as the Villain League is.
Sparx: (Barely lifting a camera) AND WE'LL RECORD THE WHOLE THIIIIIIII- (He slumps to the ground)
Dai Shi: Oh, I'm sure all of you know what I am capable of! My chi abilities are unrivaled to anyone besides Kai! I made sure that, besides Kai, I'm the strongest chi master in China...bar none!
Lord Shen: That's where you're wrong, Dai Shi! I'm sure that, as a 'strong chi master', you can predict what we can do.
Dai Shi: Oh, and what would your first move be? Go ahead, give it your best shot. You'll never do it before I turn these masters to jade!
Icky: HEY, WHAT'S THAT OVER THERE?!?
Dai Shi: HAH! Cheap trick. I bet even Kai couldn't even fall for that silly trick.
Po:... He did.
Dai Shi:... Wow... I can't believe you were afraid of that guy. But still, it won't work on me.
Icky: Worth a shot.
Dai Shi: Okay, if you're all done fooling around, can I please-

Chapter 7: Lord Shen's Ultimate Act of Repentance[]

Lord Shen: (In slow motion) SLOW MOTION DIVING AT YOU!! (He pounced into Dai Shi as the two began to fight again)
Dai Shi: TA CHA!? PAN!? GET THE BRIBE OUT OF HERE AT ONCE!! APPARENTLY I AM NOT FINISHED WITH MY PAST!!
Ta Cha: You heard her, let's go! (The army ants tried to get the Kung Fu Masters and the five out of the area while Pan Zing sumo-stomped the ground and summoned forth chi glowing rocks)
Sam: HANG ON, THAT GUY'S GONNA MEAN BUSINESS!
Merlin: As for the Kung Fu Masters...Teleportus! (The Kung Fu master hostages are teleported into the van)
Dai Shi: NO! MY LEVERAGE!!!
Po: HAH! See that? THAT'S one of the reasons why the Villain League is a complete joke to us. We defeat them in...sad and lazy anticlimactic ways...that still works in our favor regardless.
Dai Shi: GIVE ME BACK THOSE HOSTAGES!! (Transforms her weapon to the firecracker launcher and fires rapidly at the van, damaging it)
Max: HOLY CRAP!!
Shifu: It would seem Dai Shi has added more to the weapons' arsenal than we thought. (Dai Shi channels chi into the launcher, causing more damage as the van lands in the middle of a lake)
Dai Shi: (Breaks the van door down) WHERE ARE THEY?!?
Chi Fu: (Girl-screams as he grabs onto Bagheera)
Bagheera: GET OFF ME! (Pushes Chi-Fu off)
Dai Shi: GIVE THEM BACK RIGHT NOW BEFORE I BLOW UP THE REST OF THIS VAN AND LEAVE YOU MISFITS STRANDED HERE!!!
Mushu: Whoa, dudette, that's really pushing it!
Dai Shi: I SWEAR TO BEIJING, I'LL DO IT!! (Lord Shen grabs her by the tail and throws her into a pond as she gurgled and got up for air and coughed)...PLECH! (Spits out a fish)
Lord Shen: You leave them out of this! This is between you and me, Dai Shi!
Dai Shi: NEVER! YOU NEED ME TO RID YOU OF THE VILLAIN LEAGUE BEFORE IT DOES SOMETHING BEYOND YOUR 'ANTICLIMACTIC' ACTIONS!!
Boss Wolf: Sis, you're as useless as a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest! Odds on how complex their plans are have never stopped us before. We're pretty much all the UUniverses need, and you're just a senseless bimbo who wants to take the easy/hard way out.
Dai Shi: WANNA BET?!?
Lord Shen: Oh, we'll have a bet alright. If this is what you TRULY want, then how's about we make a deal. If we lose, you can get as much training as you want. But if we win...then I think Icky would like to decide.
Icky:...Uh, Shen, is this really wise? You do realize that she kicked your fan-butt across the village? This deal is not going to play in our favor.
Shi-Te: Indeed! For a former warlord, this must be the stupidest thing you've ever considered!
Lord Shen: With all due respect, this might be smarter than you think. I wouldn't have made this deal if I knew I couldn't win.
Dai Shi: HAH! And what makes you think you can win against me THIS time?
Iago: Yeah, what?
Lord Shen: Well, that last fight against you seemed to give me enough strength to increase in my chi capabilities. Over the past 5 hours before you arrived, I trained enough to let that last fight boost my chances of seeing inside myself even more.
Po:...Shen, are you sure there's not a slim chance that she'll defeat you?
Lord Shen: Just trust me on this one, panda! Again, I wouldn't do this if I knew I couldn't win.
Shi-Te: YOU CRAZY, PEACOCK?!? WHAT IF SHE DOES WIN?!? THIS IS A CHOICE THAT IS GOING TO DOOM US ALL!!! I SHOULDN'T HAVE TRUSTED YOU!!!
Lord Shen: Oh, I'm sure you'll be surprised, fatass! Trust me, I know what I'm doing.
Shi-Te: I sure hope so.
Dai Shi: (Chuckles) This just got interesting, Shen! You just decide to throw your own friends' lives, and your chance of repentance away with this deal. Well, prepare to lose more than your life!
Lord Shen:...(Takes deep breath)...(Does inner-peace stances, and starts to glow in chi energy)
Dai Shi: Oooh, shiny, but not a good time for a light show, bird-brain! Prepare for oblivion! (She transforms her blades into a large spear, spun it at quick speeds, and struck towards Shen as quick as she could, but at a total instant, he caught it while glowing stronger in chi energy)...What?
Lord Shen: (Bursts in chi energy, shocking Dai Shi. Shen then glowed brighter as all the crop gardens miraculously got restored, and more flowers bloomed, surprising about everyone)
Icky:...Mind blown!
Dai Shi:...HAH! I'm supposed to be afraid of that? I can do that too! (Does the same thing, though not as intense, and she transformed her weapon into a sword similar to Shen's, as the two clashed as the weapons glowed in energy)
Shi-Te:...I...I'm confused. Does this prove anything?
Po: I think it might. Maybe Shen is more clever than we expected.
Skipper: Let's just see how this plays out.
Dai Shi: HOW COULD YOU MANAGE TO GET SUCH CHI FROM MERE HOURS?!? WHO, DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!"
Lord Shen: Who hasn't asked that question?... Who is anyone? Who am I really?... Am I the son of peacock nobles? The uncle? The adopted father? The lover of a troubled sun goddess? The repenting failed conqueror of China? A general? The defeater of many villainous plans? Why... it's simple.... I'm all that and more! (Creates an Asian Phoenix Avatar, shocking Dai Shi!)... I, AM LORD SHEN, PROUD HIGH-RANKED MEMBER OF THE SHELL LODGE SQUAD!! I make sure nobody threatens my home, my friends, OR my way of life. And nobody can tell me that I'm just a monster who cannot change... because I can, have, and will! (The two started fighting)
Icky: Yikes! Well, enjoy the fight everybody, we've got popcorn.
Dai Shi: You will regret defeating me, Shen! The moment the Villain League does something devastating and beyond even YOUR power, you're going to regret not having me stop it before it occurs! You're going to doom yourself, your home, friends, AND way of life by doing this.
Lord Shen: And how is putting YOU in charge of ending them going to make this any better? You run the risk of ending up just as bad as Kai.
Dai Shi: I will end the Villain League's reign of terror.
Lord Shen: We've taken away enough of their control since the Second Cartoonian War! We destroyed and/or contained several Darkspawn relics capable of releasing evils beyond our comprehension, and we've BEATEN Darkspawn before. The Villain League is nothing to be scared of thanks to us. They don't even have Cynder anymore! They even lost their extreme edge! Heck, the closest you'll ever find being an example of those days is Junjie, and we handle him almost ridiculously easy regardless of the extremes he makes. As they evolved, so have we. We do our job the right way. You, on the other hand, think that destroying them completely is going to make a difference.
Dai Shi: What's the problem? Wouldn't you want the Villain League gone?
Lord Shen: What good hero doesn't? They're the bane of all heroes, and antiheroes alike. The thing is, however, that the League has a bad habit of never staying down, even if we were to take down Mirage, Xehanort, AND Mang for good. They will ALWAYS find a way to come back. Even if they were taken down by the High Council, they will come back! Good and evil can NEVER truly destroy each other. Sure, you can get rid of the villain itself, but it doesn't stop darkness as a whole. It's like a hydra. It'll always grow a new head to replace it's fallen. The best we can do is make sure that darkness is kept from getting worse. And right know, your anti-villain antics qualifies as a head that needs to be stopped. You run the risk of getting yourself killed, becoming a new age Kai, or even another pawn for Mang to use. I have to put a stop to that.
Dai Shi: You saw how I adapted to one of your plans, Shen! I can surpass anything they can throw at me!!
Lord Shen: The League has two advantages over that: the ability to counter-strategy even on someone like you, and that they cheat! They can just as easily pretend to actually lose to you just to get you cocky and strike when you least suspect it. We should know, they sometimes still pull fast ones on us every once in the while.
Dai Shi: WHY IS IT THAT NO ONE HAS ANY FAITH IN ME?!? I THOUGHT YOU WOULD BE HAPPY THAT I AM TRYING TO AVENGE YOUR HONOR!!
Lord Shen: By all means, I appreciate the gesture... but I already redeemed my own honor long ago. If anything, it's YOUR honor who needs to be redeemed.
Dai Shi: ALRIGHT, PEA-C***!!! I'M GOING TO WIN THIS BET IN THE BLINK OF AN EYE!!
Lord Shen: You'll fall trying! (The two began fighting)
Shi-Te: (He was a amazed by this)...
Icky:... So, you take back what you said? You ready to apologize?
Shi-Te: Let's just see how this plays out BEFORE we get crazy with that! I'm still weighing my options.
Tigress: Wise decision. (Dai Shi and Lord Shen still fought until a powerful blast sends Dai Shi straight into a tree)
Dai Shi: OOF!!... Ugh!
Lord Shen: (Floats to the ground)... Given up yet, Dai Shi? Because I'm sure Icky's already thinking about what we should do with you if we win.
Icky: I wasn't, I was too focused on this fight.
Dai Shi: (Gets up on the weapon, though only barely)... You think you're so tough, Shen? Well, too bad, BECAUSE I SHALL NEVER GIVE UP UNTIL I GET WHAT I- (Shen blasted her with a cannon)... (The dust cleared as Dai Shi's chi could only barely protect her as her body was scratched and burned)... See?... I can... resist... everything you've go- (Falls to the ground weakened)
Lord Shen:... Well, Dai Shi, looks like you lost. Now while you feel embarrassed after what Icky decides for you, I shall- (Dai Shi transformed her weapon into a katana, but Shen grabbed it in time)... Okay, I think I speak for everyone when I say, I AM TIRED OF THIS ACCURSED FABLED WEAPON!! I mean no disrespect for Master Moo and Morph Wao, but... (Takes the weapon away from Dai Shi and snaps it in two)... ENOUGH OF THIS ACCURSED THING!!
Dai Shi:... Aw, crap!
Lord Shen: So, are you done?
Dai Shi: NEVER?! I CAN ALWAYS REPAIR IT!!
Lord Shen: Well, too bad, because I can do this all day. (Dai Shi attempted to punch Shen down, but the punch hardly did anything)... Thank you, mam, may I have another?
Dai Shi:...DIE, PEACOCK! (She continues attacking Shen, but he is hardly phased by the attacks, and Shen punched her into a pond)...Ow!
Lord Shen: Last chance, back out or back down!
Dai Shi: I'LL BACK YOU DOWN!!! (Continues trying to beat Shen, but he is able to overpower every move until he twists her arms behind her back) YAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! OW, OW, OW, OW, OW, I THINK MY ARMS ARE GOING TO SHATTER!!!
Lord Shen: You cracking yet, Dai Shi? Because I can do more pain than THAT!
Dai Shi: ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT, YOU WIN, YOU WIN!!! JUST PLEEAASSEE HAVE MERCEE-HEE-HEE-HEE-HEEE!!!
Icky: Wow, what a crying little p****!
Shi-Te:...That would be totally uncalled for...if it wasn't true.
Dai Shi: (Shen lets her go as she recovered from the pain)...Whatever you bastards have in store for me...you'd better just...make it merciful.
Icky: Oh, I don't know what to do with you. There's so many good ideas I've come up with since that deal.
Sparx: (Struggles with the same camera from earlier)...How about THIS? (Hands Icky the camera as he collapsed in exhaustion)
Icky: (Sees the whole recording of the fight)...Hmm...I think you may be getting somewhere. I think the Villain League would like to take a look at this. They may be villains, but I guess they deserve a little something after the many times they dealt with Junjie.
Lord Shen:...So you're resorting to blackmailing?
Icky: Oh, I won't post it on YouTube, I'll just edit the video, and email it to the Villain League. And if THEY end up uploading it to YouTube, then all I can say is...at least it won't be us doing it.
Dai Shi:...That sounds a little dark for you Lodgers!
Icky: Sorry, lady, but a bet is a bet, and I've already spoken.
Fidget: I thought there was no Wi-Fi here yet.
Icky: Actually...the connection is getting stronger now. I guess they finally got through with it.

Spirit Realm Cutaway

Oogway: (He was seen casting a chi tehnique that's clearing out the interference of the sector, allowing the stations to respond)...(Chuckles)... What can I say? I always love a good laugh.

Present

Icky: Oh, man, the Villain League is not going to believe this!

Villain League HQ, 30 minutes later...

Lord Cobra: I don't believe this! (They were watching the video on a movie projector)...
Plankton:...Huh? Some sister of Boss Wolf wanted to destroy us for what we did to Shen...only to be embarrassed by Shen.
Mirage: Such a foolish determination and a waste of chi training. Even she would know we would've ended her in an instant.
Teen Mang: I'm just confused at why the Lodgers would want to email this to us. Don't they hate us?
Cobra: Even the Lodgers have a sense of 'throwing us a bone' every once in a while. A sort've thank you for not taking Junjie seriously.
Junjie: (Sighs angrily and making teeth-clenched gibberish)
Dr. Blowhole: Well, if there's one thing the Lodgers know how to do, it's embarrass the cra-a-a-a-a-ap out of villains.
Teen Mang:... Oh, now I see the complete irony. (Some of the villains laughed)
Venom: What a total bitch of a loser.
Fagin: Oh, hey Venom, you haven't been given an appearence since early Season 1... assumingly.
Venom: (Sighs)... It sucks being a neglected character.
Mack Salmon: All for posting this on YouTube, say aye!
Most Villains: AYE!

Chapter 8: Dai Shi Shamed/Shen Fully Accepted[]

Panda Village

Icky: (The video was seen on the Internet)...Up, there ya go, Dai Shi's humiliated.
Dai Shi:... I... I... I...
Pan Zing: Miss Dai Shi, I'm afraid your UUniversal reputation as 'an anti-villain' has been officially 'trashed' as one would describe.
Ta Cha: Yeah, once something like that gets on the Internet, you're done as a 'villain' for lack of a better term.
Hawk 1: And we're not gonna do anything to avenge her?
Xao: After seeing the peacock doing THAT to Dai Shi?!? I'd rather not risk it.
Merlin: Oh, trust me... (Teleports all of Dai Shi's followers in a magic trap bubble) Shen is the LEAST of your concerns.
Ta Cha:... And of course, there's that.
Dai Shi: (She plops to the floor and starts to cry)... Why?!?... WHY DO THIS TO ME?!?
Icky:... Lady, we did this out of getting you out of the life of an anti-villain and get you on the straight and narrow. That's pretty much the majority of us doing it. The part about embarrassing you is only a small guilty pleasure award for us.
Shifu: Dai Shi, by all means, we have no love or fondness for the Villain League. But we are also not strong fans of those that want to risk their lives and the UUniverses' safety trying to get revenge on them or any other villain team. Heck, we wouldn't even let you go after Team Nefarious if they did something stupid to you.
Dai Shi: But, I would've-
Po: So would they! Trust me on this, the League wouldn't've been a very successful villain team if people like you can just walk up to them and smack them down like a stack of dominos. Otherwise, you'd think a LOT of the League's victims would've made them pay by now.
Dai Shi: YET THERE WAS NO PROBLEM WITH YOU GUYS DISBANDING A VILLAIN TEAM FROM ALTERNATE UUNIVERSES!!
Po: Well, that was mainly because those guys did WAY too many bad things for so many years. Things WORSE than even the League in their extremist days ever could do. And even then, though the original Villains Act is toast, it lives on in those 'Dark Radical' guys now. It's like what Shen said. Villainy is like a hydra. Getting rid of one head won't end it forever. It'll just get another head. The best you can do, is at least make sure it's kept from getting worse. And that's what we did. We kept the Villain League from making more Shens, more Dark Cynders, more anything! And just now... we stopped another Kai or a new League toy from happening.
Dai Shi: (She was finally out of arguments, and was at a weaker position)... I just... wanted to get back the life that was taken from me when it got dishonored by what Shen was tricked to do. I just... wanted to have my family back.
Shi-Te: THEN WHY DID YOU CONSTANTLY TRY TO KILL HIM?!?
Dai Shi: I DON'T KNOW!! I-I couldn't think straight!! I was only fighting for my destiny.
Lord Shen: You mean you were fighting for the destiny you thought you wanted, but in reality, it was not really yours. It was never your destiny to take down the Villain League, not one way or the other. Heck, we ourselves might not necessarily be the ones to do it. It might only be our destiny to keep them from getting worse.
Dai Shi: But what was wrong with MAKING it your destiny?
Icky: Cuz' destiny's a fickle bitch. It's the ultimate c***-tease. Like when you randomly say you're gonna have the best day ever, you ended up having it go to s*** real quick. Just ask SpongeBob in that regard.
SpongeBob: (Sighs) It's true.
Dai Shi:... But... what am I to do now? I've spent all of my life training to take down the League.... All of this power I have, my learnings on how to eventually rebuild the weapon, my ability to establish a powerful army of army ants with a Hercules beetle that can make earthquakes, and a falcon with some hawk bodyguards.... WASTED!! What else am I supposed to do with my life, huh?!? If it was not my destiny, nor would it assumingly never will be, THEN WHAT ELSE IS THERE FOR ME?!? Who am I really if I'm not the one destined to take down the League? WHO!? WHO?!
Shifu: (He and Li Shan began to ponder something)... Dai Shi?... Instead of learning chi to take the League away from existence... why not learn chi to understand the joy you once lost when that fateful day happened?
Dai Shi:... Wha?
Lord Shen: Dai Shi, if you're real intent was to have a family again... then you don't need to avenge something that was already avenged in a less extreme way.
Po: Yeah, all you had to do was ask.
Dai Shi: Wha-... But I attacked your village and I was gonna turn some of you into jade pieces. I conquered the Valley and Gongman prior. I-I TRIED TO KILL SOMEONE WHO WAS LIKE A FATHER TO ME!!
Cynder: Dai Shi, compared to me when I was once Dark Cynder, you weren't THAT bad.
Icky: And for all it's worth, miss, at least you were only crazy against people that technically deserved it. You just needed to realize that the thing you wanted to get them back for, was already covered.
Shi-Te: Okay, wait! We're suddenly gonna forget that this crazy bitch was- (Li Shan cleared his throat demandingly)... Okay, okay, even I can't be TOO grudge-mental. (He approached Shen) Well, peacock... lucky for you, I may be a jerk, but I'm a jerk to my word. You completed the repentence deal, and though it will still take me time for me to TRULY get over what you did to my family, I'll at least start looking at you with SOME positivity. I will still call you out for any short-comings, but again, that's just my sense of humor.
Ta Cha: Uh, wait!... Does that mean that the rest of us are retired as villains also?
Mantis: Well, you guys are associated with Dai Shi, so.... yeah. Guess that means I don't have three major enemies anymore. I just have the one now.
Pan Zing: (Sighs relieved) To be honest... it's what my family would've wanted.
Ta Cha: Well, lucky for you, Mantis, because you learned my technique, being your arch-enemy is dangerous now, so I'm better off retired. That, and... mother wouldn't've approved of my earlier career choice anyway, so, why not?
Xao: But... what about my husband Kung Lao? What he did was to protect his home, and he was unfairly punished. I only turned dark to one day reunite with him.
Icky: Xao, babe? Ya know we can hook ya up with being able to visit the guy on Prison 42's visiting days. You just gotta earn that right.
Xao: (She began to tearfully cry)... Thank you!
Dai Shi: But what?! What can we do instead of seeking out the League?
Li Shan: Simple.... You can start seeking out a locust bandit problem we've had for a while. With our crops all restored, they're likely to come back and get them.
Dai Shi:... Really? Pest control? I never even FOUGHT the Locust Bandits before.
Pan Zing: But you are allied with those that managed to fight them off before.
Dai Shi: But my weapon is destroyed and it would take me weeks to repair. And those locusts are likely faster by days, or even the day after. How am I gonna do what you ask if I can't rely on a powerful weapon?
Po: Oh, I'm sure that you and Shen, combined with your chi power, can make those crops pest-proof. Even the Locust Bandits cannot beat that.
Dai Shi:...Well...if you say so, then I can give it a shot.

Later...

Sin Su Mu: CHAAAAAAARGE!!! (The locusts swarmed towards the field of crops) TONIGHT, WE HAVE ANOTHER FULL FEAST!!
Dai Shi:...Are you sure this will work?
Lord Shen: Does a cricket chirp?
Sin Su Mu: (The locusts quickly bit into the crops, then hesitated)...(Then they suddenly went on a barfing frenzy as they backed away from the crops)...OH, GOD, THESE CROPS TASTE TERRIBLE NOW!! THEY TASTE LIKE S*** COMBINED WITH ROTTEN FRUIT!!! (Barfs)
Locust #1: OH, GOD, MY TASTE BUDS ARE IN AGONY- (Barfs)
Sin Su Mu: RETREAT!! LET'S NEVER BE ANYWHERE NEAR THESE PUTRID ABOMINATIONS AGAIN!! (The locusts flew off leaving barf trails behind)
Icky:...(Scoffs and laughs) What an embarrassing way to retreat!
Sparx: (Lifting the camera again) Hello, YouTube! (Falls to the ground struggling with the weight of the camera)
Shi-Te:...Well, that solves our locust problem. That'll teach those pests to chow down on things that don't belong to them.
Sum: Though...somebody might wanna clean up the puke.
Dim: Why? It's on soil.
Sum: What if some of it got on the crops?
Dim:...Fair point.
Dai Shi:... So... what's to become of me now?
Shifu: Well, you still committed crimes including bribery, attempted murder, and attacking villages. That could be Chorh-Gom Prison worthy.
Dai Shi: Aw, dammit!
Shifu: But I'll try and convince them to minimize your stay there, probably through a year or so.
Dai Shi: Well, good! The last thing I want is to rot away with deadly criminals.
Shifu: There are no guarantees that they will go easy with your sentence. Your crimes still cannot be looked over.
Dai Shi: (Sighs) Very well! At least I'll put my powers to good use as soon as I get out. I just hope that prison is not as bad as the others across China. Especially that one that was disbanded several years ago for false arrests, police brutality and cruelty, and for unauthorized life imprisonment.
Shifu: You mean Cirhi-Wang Prison? Oh, absolutely, the Emperor had the Kung Fu Council take care of that place, and sentence it's warden, Warden Chu Zhung, to life imprisonment in Chorh-Gom. The last thing China needs is a prison that treats people however it wants like they feel more superior.
Icky: Uh, let's stop adding filler, and just bring Dai Shi and her followers in. They'll be sure to give them the right punishment.

Hours later...

Icky: (A huge feast was held in Shen and the other Lodgers' honor by the pandas) I propose a toast! Now he may be a pain in the ass at times, and trust me, he has his angry moments, but he's proven that his heart is pure to all of you! So let's all celebrate the one who destroyed your community only to give birth to another...kinda...to Lord Shen!
Everyone: TO LORD SHEN! (The Lodgers were the only ones eating casually while most of the pandas were slobbery with their eating)
Icky:...I can see where Po gets his bad eating habits from.
Po: Most pandas eat like that. Though some are wise enough to not be like that. As for us, we're just glad that Lord Shen has finally achieved his goal.
Lord Shen: I'll say. (Shivers as the pandas continued eating like pigs)
Shi-Te:...I swear, these people will never learn proper table manners. I bet they would be kicked out of a banquet and never invited again.
Po: You have NO idea!
Dim/Sum: HERE COMES THE WAGON!
Lodgers: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO- (The burp was heard all throughout China as everyone moaned in aggravation)
Tigress: OH, GOD, THAT SMELLS!!!
Iago: WORSE THAN PO!!!
Sparx: WORSE THAN SUPERINTENDANT CHANG!!!
Boss Wolf: WORSE THAN THAT S.T.A.N.K S***!!!
Lord Shen:...Can we go now?

Epilogue[]

Later, Back in the Dragon Realms...

Lord Shen: (They arrived as Lord Shen stretches) OOOOOOOH, Sweet Beijing Province! It's FINALLY nice to return to the Dragon Realms! It's home away from home.
Icky: Yeah, especially when your normal home tends to end up smelling like panda burps.
Po: Hardy-har-har.
Lord Shen: But still, I feel like we should be able to visit the pandas more often. There's still so much I have to learn about their culture.
SpongeBob: Well, after that experience, I think we'll be glad to FINALLY experience a normal stay in the Dragon Guardian Temple. Villainy is yet at another slow day with the next V-Con coming up, so maybe we'll get a break for once.

Unfamiliar Location

(Icky): Dude, you better had not have jinxed us.
(SpongeBob): I better not have!
???: (She was seen in a strange laboratory with large chamber structures)... Awake, my darlings. (The figure giggled as the chambers glew green with color) For today, vengeance is gonna be a skaley bitch. (Laughs maniacally)

Fin?