TEEN LIGHT's Community Blog (original) (raw)
TEEN LIGHT's Community Blog
12th June, 2005. 4:16 pm. Summer Dreamin'!(cowgirl8151)
Hey ya'll!
Just thought I'd drop a line while I was thinking about it. This week I'll be working, packing (& shopping) for my trip next week to Denver, and getting ready to have fun next weekend as it is our annual family reunion!!! Whew...i'm a busy girl! LOL. Maybe things will slow down a bit when I return from vacation. Who knows?! Life can be chaotic but it can also be a lot of fun! Life is just what you make it. It comes through the choices you make. So, to all who is reading this (if anyone, lol)have fun, live a fulfilled life like each day is a precious gift, be aware of the choices you make and rely on God for everything,for he will guide you through. You only get one go around so have fun. Make your life worthwile. Live for God.
Sorry I'm cutting this kinda short. I'm signing off for the moment. Just Remember that I love you and MOST IMPORTANTLY SO DOES GOD! Let Him walk this long, hard road with you and believe and trust Him in everything along the way because the destination is soooo much sweeter and way worth it! God Bless You Always!
Love,
Ashley
4th May, 2005. 10:48 am. Changing Alone?(sara_thunder)
May 4th, 2005
Last night I had the dream again. Yes - THE dream. This past week or so I have been dreaming it every single night. It's almost a danger to go to bed, for quite often I can't fall asleep for over an hour or so. I can't help but think...of home...of here. When I finally do drift off to sleep - I dream of you. The dream is so vivid each time, not the hazy "feeling" dream I usually have. In this dream I can see each and everyone of you. Each morning when I wake up, I'm left with the same, worrisome feeling. The feeling of change. I can't help but wonder if you will really know me when I get home. Have I really changed that much as for you to forget me - or worse yet - remember me but not know the girl who walks through the door? It may be a silly fear, but inevitable when I've been away so long. It's strange how we are so afraid of change, when often it is the very best thing for us! Yet this morning as I was thinking of it, it struck me that it's not so much the change itself that worries us - it's changing alone. Without ones family and friends. It's that fear of strangeness that makes us shy away from change. I know I have changed, I can hardly help it being here in a whole other world, but I am determined not to change alone. That is why I write to you. I'm going to drag you all along with me...:)
I thought I knew myself before I came here - but now I realize that in so may ways I really don't. Like how in the world can the shy, quiet girl now speak and laugh as one of the most outgoing Koreans? Or how she, the girl who got lost in the little town of Markdale, direct any driver to her "house" even when Anna, her guide, is somewhat confused? All I can say is - she's blessed...
Last night when I got home from teaching one of my last classes, I was told that a young man had called asking for me. Halmoanee (which is Korean for "grandmother") was sure it was my boyfriend. That, I told her could not be as I didn't have one. After I had heard everyone's opinion on the subject, I ventured to say that it was probably my father - as I was suppose to call him tonight, and was about a half an hour late, as my class went overtime. Anyways, they thought that was quite amusing - because of course it was my father. But it is a common mistake for our Halmoanee. The other week when a young man called asking for Mi-Na, the moment she got off the phone Halmoanee asked, "When are they getting married?" (It's a culture thing - to get everyone married off as soon as possible! Here - all good sons or daughters are married before they are 30 ;)Anyways, we found out later that he was actually a Korean man who I had met in Canada, through Anna, and he wanted to make a time to meet. We were all quite amused...:)
As for more personal news, I finish tutoring on Wednesday, then head to Seoul to the best shopping spot, Dong Dae Moon. We shop for a day, sleep in a public sleeping place (don't ask me what that is - I have yet to find out...!) then Thursday, I meet up up with a few friends and stay with them until Saturday. Then Sunday, there is a big birthday party planned for Anna's baby. Many are going to be wearing the Korean traditional dress - so I will have a real occasion to wear mine! They are going to show me how to put up my hair and make-up in the traditional style. There will be about 30 guests, with the food catered. And two of my friends will be coming to it also...so...I have a feeling that it will be one of the craziest, busiest days yet! But then - also one of the most exciting...:)
Take care - send me an email - and miss me lots! :)
God Bless you,
~Shannon
27th April, 2005. 12:33 pm. Little Things(sara_thunder)
April 27th, 2005
Hello everyone,
I hope you are all well. The days here are busy and full. So many little things have been happening...little things that just can't all be told in a single email! So you'll have to wait until I get home for the "full story." But right now, as I have no pressing matters to attend to, I'll attempt to tell just a little of what's been going on here.
Last Saturday we attended the Ceramic Exhibition in Icheon. It was packed with people. Throughout the entire day though, I only saw a total of five white people. Yes - five in the midst of hundreds. And that count of five more then doubles my count from the past few weeks. It was then that I realized I really am a minority here. A huge minority. But what was even more startling was that I found myself unaware of that fact. As I, along with the throngs of other Korean people, stood there gaping at every white person that past by, it suddenly hit me that I was also white. There are no words to describe what I felt then. But I do believe I was mostly amused and slightly embarrassed. I get stares all the time and so I have come to get used to them...mostly. The polite "you're so interesting to watch" stare is okay...even normal. But the "who in the world are you" stare is somewhat harder to take...it makes one nervous. Little things though, small gestures (like clapping your hands when you are delighted with something) I've picked and do without even thinking! So be prepared to meet the "white Korean" when I get home and be ready for a few good laughs. For I'm now sure that I will be going through culture shock all over again - only this time - my own! :)
As this exhibition was the biggest event of the year for Icheon, there were quite a few photoghrapers (both white and Korean) milling about in the crowd. And not just the wanna-be's, I'm talking about real photographers with a huge cameras and more often then not, a video camera strapped onto their shoulder. What I found quite amusing was that the white photoghrapers only took shots of the Koreans. Well on the other hand, the Korean photographers would do the exact opposite, focusing their attention on the white people there. Which of course included me. Which leads me to another thought. I really am a celebrity here. No joke! I really am. I walk down the street and people say hello to me. Those who find me amusing merely wave - which I return. And it's not just the occasional hello and wave that concerns me. It's when I have to deal with five from a walk from the restaurant door to my table that I start to get worried...
I have SO much more to tell (like how I came home one day with a WHOLE roast chicken in my bag....or why I'll be getting a ceramic vase shipped to my house in precisely one month...or how I came to realize that I'm really not short at all...or the fact that I suddenly have an amazing sense of direction...) but that will all have to wait...as I really must go now...
For those of you still waiting to receive a reply to your email from me - please except my deepest apologizes. My fan mail is slightly backed up at this time. Please be patient - as I WILL get to it! :)
Love you all...and your emails...miss you lots!
God bless you,
~Shannon
P.S. Despite popular opinion, I AM looking forward to getting my hands in the dishwater again...and being able to disappear into the corner once again and observe, instead of being the observed...:)
19th April, 2005. 2:02 pm. From the Korean Princess(sara_thunder)
April 19th, 2005
Hello all,
At dinner the other night I sat down to the usual bowel of rice, various kinds of kimchee and some other new, greyish things. Yes - the greyish things were definably new.
"It's squid. Raw squid." I was told.
Oh, I could handle that. I LOVE squid - and as for raw part - that just meant that it would have a lot more flavor. Not only could I handle anything raw - I even ENJOYED raw foods! I picked up the metal chopsticks I had come to master and went for a big long piece (which from experience I have learned that the bigger it is, the easier it usually is to pick up;). But this piece stuck...no matter how I pulled I could not get it up. Somewhat humbled by my feeble attempts at something I thought I had mastered, I tried for a smaller piece. This time I was able to pick it up without too much difficulty. After a somewhat uneventful trip from the hot dipping sauce to my mouth, I began to chew. It really wasn't that bad...it just tasted like chewy squid! As I reached out my chopsticks for another piece though, something happened that I had not quite counted on.
A piece of squid moved.
At first I thought I must be seeing things, someone must have bumped the table. But as the whole plate of squid began to whither and move as neighboring chopsticks dove in, expertly twisting in such a way as to dis-attache the tentacles from the plate, I KNEW I was not seeing things.
They were not only raw - but alive!
That insane thought was quickly confirmed by a pointed finger and giggle..."Look - they're moving! See - they're alive!"
And so they were. So they were.
With a somewhat wider eye and a growing upset stomach, I desperately dove my chopsticks into the mass of moving bodies once more. After a trying fight, I manged to disengage one moving mass from the others and lift it off the plate.
Don't think...I told myself...just chew. That's all I had to do. Just chew.
At least that's what I thought before it began sticking onto the inside of my mouth! Because you may not have tried it I will add that it is VERY hard to chew a wiggling, slithering mass that is stuck to the inside of your mouth. Very, very hard. I managed one frantic chew and a quick swallow...
....and the THING was gone.
And that was the last one I ever put in my mouth. For the rest of the meal I sat and watched fascinated as my friends expertly manipulated these moving creatures onto their chopsticks and then somehow got them down their throat. My esteem for my friends grew greatly that day - for I don't think I have ever seen anyone eat an alive, wiggling tentacle before with such ease and calm. The taste may not be all that bad...but when it begins moving...it's hard to get your head around....
One thing I must make very clear though is that the people here are SO very good to me. They treat me like a princess.
I get a ride to and from almost all of my tutoring classes. Halfway through each class we take a break and the mothers serve us water, tea, juice (sometimes all three at once!) as we eat whatever huge "snack" they haved prepared for us. They are always so concerned that I don't like the food...and so once they find out I really like something...I find myself eating it the rest of the week :)
The family I'm staying with won't let me do any housework or cleaning either - not even my own - because I'm a guest. Their grandmother insists that she do my laundry - because she likes to help me. If there is one word they all know in English now it is "thank you"...I use it so much....
They tell me that the "white girl" is sweet, charming and beautiful so they want to do many things for her. The other day they dressed me up in their traditional Korean dress and said that I was a real "Korean Princess" now.
I take that as the highest compliment. Even if it means eating a few whithering, live squids.
Love you all so much and miss you more then words can say.
God Bless you!
~Shannon
18th April, 2005. 11:12 am. All is Well - Update from Korea - Update from the White Girl(sara_thunder)
April 5th, 2005
Hey People!
I'm here! And all is well... that is...besides the fact that I got questioned BEHIND the RED LINE about why was I going to Korea for a whole month and shouldn't I be in school, etc. Then of course we almost missed our flight out of Chicago because we could not find terminal 5. Lastly, after surviving a 14 hour flight (4 movies and 2 hours of sleep later) one of my bags happened to get misplaced (and of course it happened to be the bag that my camera, journal, vitamins, music and hair brush is in! So what do you know, I shall have to learn how to survive without them for the next few days.) But of course, like I said, all is well :) All is very well.
Only, I think I might be forced to faint from fatigue before the day is through, the time change does not agree with me. Ah, I shall have to nap this afternoon! As for right now, I'm heading out to a English Conversation Club and shall do my best to get a phone card at the same time.
AMAZING FACT FOR THE DAY - I ate breakfast on the floor, with chopsticks - and didn't even mess a bit! :) More later!
Love you all,
~Shannon
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April 9th, 2005
Hello everyone!
Thank you all SO much for your replies to my last note...they really, REALLY mean a lot to me. Thank you so much. I will reply to each and every one of them - it just may take me a while...:)
I am well and finally all recovered from my loss of sleep. Though, the days here are now so busy and long that I'm always ready to hit the sack at bedtime :)
These past few days we've been meeting with teachers, parents and students about tutoring. I'm simply amazed each day at everyone's kindness to me. As Anna is sitting there explaining what we are going to do (in Korean) I sit there trying to look interested and pleasant. You would not believe how hard it is to do so when you don't understand a word anyone is saying. After an hour and a half of sitting on the floor (with of course no back rest and no carpet...I never realized until now how much I use them! :) it can be quite a challenge. But they seem to think that it is wonderful that I try so I guess that is all that really matters :) They are delighted with the few Korean words I can speak...and well...the feeling is mutual, I can assure you. A smile works wonders but being able converse...well...it is such a gift. When I come across someone who can speak English quite fluently...it is such a delight to be able to talk with them (and this is me saying this...the shy, silent one:) Sometimes the things you miss most are the things you least expect.
As for the Korean food...it is lovely...yet so different! There is of course rice with every meal but their is also a variety of about 25 side dishes! The amount of food they make is amazing. So much of their food here is fresh too...the tomatoes are exceptionaly good! :) But their food is also twice as filling as ours. It's like eating a Thanksgiving dinner everyday...at evey meal! :) Also, if you want to let someone know how much you like them, in Korea you don't send them a card, you take them out to eat! :) And so I eat and eat and eat, not because I'm hungrey, but because there is food in front of me. Mi-na's father cannot see how I can survive on such "little" food! :) At every meal we eat at a little table on the floor with metal chopsticks that are TONS more difficult to eat with them wooden ones! The food slips everywhere! Also, not only do you take off your shoes before you go into someone else's house you also take them off before you go into a restaurant. They even have little cubbies for your shoes...it's so neat!
Also, everything is heated here. The floors - the toilet seat. In fact, the bathroom is quite amazingly actually. You don't shower in the tub...there is no tub...or anything to contain the water. You shower on the floor (there is even a beautiful drain in the corner) which of course leaves the floor wet 99% of the time. Which is probably why they go barefoot around the house:)
The mountains are beautiful...really, really lovely...and they are everywhere! So are apartment buildings. Infact, right in the city there are no houses at all! Just stores, cars driving really fast...and apartment buildings :) The place I'm staying in is on the outskirts of a town called Incheon (which is actually 2 1/2 hours south west of Seoul...I only just learned on the drive from the airport:). The home is lovely - and it is infact a house. But it is still so different. The main living space is all floor...used for eating, sleeping, watching TV and visiting with guests. The only chair in the house is in front of the computer desk! It really is all amazingly different!
I have to go now and get ready for a tutoring class...love you all and miss you lots!
God Bless,
~Shannon
P.S. THE MISSING BAG IS FOUND AND ALL IS SAFE :)
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April 14, 2005
Hello everyone!
Now, I have some really big news so if you're not sitting down - please do so now! Thank you. This past week we came to realize that with all the tutoring I am doing - my schedule does not allow me to visit my Korean friends who have moved back home or to do too much sightseeing (beyond the everyday life kind). Now everyday life is wonderful, but after coming all this way - we thought that it would make the most sense to see as much as possible. So now, the plans have been somewhat altered and I will not be coming home on the 28th. My trip has been extended for another two weeks - until May 12th. Before you say anything...I must admit that I do have mixed feelings about this. On one hand I love Korea, and could not dream of leaving it without first seeing all I can see and visiting my close Korean friends. On the other hand, if I wasn't under the obligation to make a wise, clear headed decision, I'd jump on the fastest plane home! Even though I am enjoying myself tremendously here, I do miss home so very much. So, the plan is I tutor until the end of the month and then for the last two weeks of my stay I will be visiting the ten or so Korean friends of mine who are dieing to show me their beautiful homeland - and of course touring the "not-so-close" sights to be seen. Okay...you can stand again...or keep on sitting as you choose. The rest of my news is not near as startling! :)
As I mentioned above - I am tutoring quite a lot. Though, that too is different then we originally expected. I have 3 different classes, the first and the youngest consisting of two boys and two girls. The youngest girl is only 3 or 4 and she comes with her sister who is ten and quite shy. The youngest boy is 5 and well...a boy. A robot loving, hyperactive boy. Mi-na's 10 year old brother also joins our class which keeps us laughing half the time. He is the comedian in the family - though I for one don't know what I am laughing at half the time! My Korean is still somewhat weak. Anyways, I have the above class, Monday, Wednesday and Friday for two hours right after they are done school. At least the formal kind. Korean students are ALWAYS studying...I don't know how these kids do it! My second class is right after the first, for two hours, on all the same days. Although the first class is by far the hardest to teach, the second is by far the eaiest. Two girls and two boys again - all twelve years old. This studants are really a joy to teach, they are so eager to learn and determined to be pleased! Also, they have the most BEAUTIFUL piano at their house (ehem...apartment...sorry)...the tone quality and touch is really lovely. I've been able to steal a few songs on it here and there when we are not rushing to be somewhere else. Having a piano at home for me to play whenever I wished is such a blessing - I don't think I shall take it for granted again too soon...I really do miss it! But now, for my last class there are three boys and one girl. Two of the boys are young, five and eight I think and the other two are eleven or twelve. The students in this class are quite quick, but have not had a lot of verbal practise with English in the past year or so. Many have forgotten what they used to know, so we are doing a whole lot of conversational practice with them. They are my weekend class as their schedule is really hectic. We do three hours each day. They all such a delight to teach though, in their own special way. I am so blessed to have the chance to teach them!
As for the weather, it's been mostly rainy here - with a day of sunshine now and then. But the rain here is different...it's humid. Not a wet humid like the Dominican Republic was...but a dry kind of humid. It's somewhat hard to explain :) The sunny days are beautiful but have a slight wind. They call this wind the yellow dust wind and it can make people quite sick. Everyone here seems to have a cold from it (including myself)! Though, I am feeling quite a lot better.
I must go now, I had planned to tell you so much more (about the family I'm staying with, etc) but that will have to wait for next time. I have no time!
Love you all and miss you SO much!
God Bless,
~Shannon
29th March, 2005. 4:16 pm. Not Always the Greatest(simplyamelia)
I am so thankful that God gives us a brand new start each day. Have you ever noticed how so often, a day just doesn't go as planned? Or how, no matter how hard you try, it just messes up and doesn't work out right?
A lot of people live under the misconception that Christians live carefree lives. And everyday is a walk through a rose garden. But the fact is that Jesus doesn't take away the trials when He comes into our lives. Rather, He helps us walk through them and guides us through the temptations.
Today has been one of those days for me. It's not that I've done anything wrong. But it seems that no matter how hard I try, I mess up. Our grandfather clock had slowed down about five minutes and I just thought my watch was running fast, so we were late to the nursing home. The setup was awkward with the people way back in the room and the only outlet for the CD player being back in a little corner. Not to mention that I got an itch in my throat halfway through the performance. Lots of little things like that. Are these big trials? No, not at all.
Even though Jesus is in my life, every day isn't necessarily going to be the greatest. But with Him in control, I know that He will help me through the days that aren't so great and give me the strength to move on to the next. Tomorrow's a new day. And God's grace and support continues day after day after day, neverending. God bless you! Be dangerous.
18th January, 2005. 10:51 am. Resolve(simplyamelia)
This beautiful challenge wasn't written by me, but by Sarah N. Since she doesn't have an LJ account, I'm publishing it on the blog for her.
***********************************************************************************************************
2005 is my year. I graduate. I start college. I have the significant birthday
that allows me to become the ever-coveted "Independent." Yes - 2005 will be a
year of new challenges, exciting opportunities, and self-definition.
Unfortunately, I've gone about it all wrong. Just take a look at the first
sentence of this devotional. "2005 is my year." Maybe if I'd said something
like, "2005 is God's year" or "2005 is the year I grow up" I would be more on
the right track.
See, we've all thought about this year in some way or another. It's the year we
lose the weight and look good for everyone we're desperate to impress. It's the
year we get a boyfriend/girlfriend. It's the year we find a job that pays a
fortune. It's the year we turn heads - in every aspect of our lives.
That's an interesting list. But what about these resolutions? It's the year we
read our Bible the whole way through. It's the year we find a way to witness to
one person every week. It's the year we don't say a single cuss word. It's the
year we never ever use the word, "hate". It's the year we don't miss church for
football - ever. It's the year we CHANGE. Not our bodies - our souls. It's the
year we GROW. Not in the financial department - in the spiritual department.
This New Year, have a resolution to RESOLVE. I know it sounds redundant, but
check it out. Resolve conflicts with family members and friends. Resolve unrest,
impatience, and depression you might be experiencing. Resolve what you're doing
with your life - make sure it lines up with God's plan.
Make it God's year, not yours.
I realize none of this is brand new information. In fact, I'll bet most of it
coincides with other devos in this very magazine. But let's turn it in a
different direction.
Make a different kind of list this year. Make a list called, "What I Did Right
In 2004". Every new year we all look at our lives and see the negatives, see
what needs to change. We didn't exercise enough. We didn't have our quite time
enough. We made bad grades. Blah blah blah.
Bottom line: we weren't good enough.
What a depressing thought.
The reason I'm talking about this at all is because last year I forgot to
remember the good in my life, in who I am, and I ended up depressed, even though
it was only for a little while. It happened at the beginning of the year, right
after I'd measured myself and decided I didn't amount to much. Then I set
unreasonable goals, trying to make myself perfect - a goal no one can ever
achieve - and I failed them because I was taking too big of leaps, which served
to depress me more. I want you to learn from my mistake last year. I did. In my
head I've gone over the ways God has blessed me this year. It's not so much
about what I have, or what I've accomplished, though it's great to remember
those things, but it's about who I am. It's about my character traits. I have
some good ones. You do too. Think about those - more importantly, thank God for
them - and keep them safe in your heart and sharp on your mind when you're
figuring out your new year's resolutions.
Reflect. Resolve. Rejoice.
May the Lord bless you and keep you.
Sarah N.
24th December, 2004. 2:16 pm. Merry Christmas(cowgirl8151)
It's that wonderful, feel good time of year again, isn't it great? I think so. There's cookies, cakes and pies filling the house with delightful yummy smells and a warm fire in the living room with the tree off to the side displaying it's lights and presents beneath with a joyful splendor, Christmas tunes on every radio and Christmas movies on every channel. It's wonderful, right? Right. BUT, thats not what Christmas is all about anyway. Christmas is the celebration of our Lord Jesus Christ's birthday that took place so long ago in Bethlehem. Let us not forget that he after all is THE REASON FOR THE SEASON! We ALL tend to forget in the hustle and bustle of shopping for gifts and last minute grocery shopping. Here's a HOLIDAY TIP: WAL-MART IS EXCEPTIONALLY CRAZY THE WEEK OF CHRISTMAS! LOL! See...we all get off course. Ya'll know what I'm talking about. Let's get back on track shall we...God sent his only son to pay the ultimate price: death, to save us. He was born to a virgin and was born in a barn but HE is the KING OF KINGS and its his birthday. The story of his birth is wonderous and is a blessing to all of us. So, this evening make some time to read the story of his birth in the good book of Luke chapter 2. HE'S THE REASON FOR THE SEASON! HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS!
YOU ALL HAVE A VERY MERRY AND SAFE CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR! GOD BLESS AND BE WITH YOU AND YOUR FAMILY ALWAYS!
Ashley
Current mood: 
cheerful.
10th September, 2004. 9:50 pm. Remember(cowgirl8151)
Hey ya'll!
Well, today is Sept. 10th, 2004 as we all know. (Your probably
sitting there staring at your screen like yeah I know...where is she
going with this. Don't worry...I am going somewhere with this. =)) I
was sitting in the cafeteria today eating lunch, chatting with
friends and helping another friend with geometry when one of my
friends said, "You know what, three years ago today there were
people at home spending time with their families not knowing that it
was the last time they were ever going to see them or spend time
with them." And...I've been thinking about tomorrow all week. It has
been three years tomorrow. My friend who brought this up just made
me think about it more...and I didn't think it was really possible
for me too. Because like everyone else I will never forget and I
also will never forget to remember them every year. It's nearly
impossible to forget the images and the fear that we all saw and
expressed. So, I'm asking you to please take some time out of today
and tomorrow to remember those we lost and to pray for them and
their families.
Finally but definitley not last, remember the children and adults
that parished in that Russian school this past week. The same group
involved with 9/11 is also involved in this. I'm imploring you to
remember and to pray.
Thank you guys and gals! Have a great day! I love you all! God Bless
Always!
Ashley
3rd September, 2004. 10:40 pm. I Am A Child Of God!(cowgirl8151)
I AM
By Ashley G.
I am a child of God.
I wonder what heaven must be like.
I hear angels singing.
I see myself walking hand in hand with Jesus.
I want to see God’s face.
I am a child of God.
I pretend that I’m at Jesus’ feet.
I feel the Lord’s hand upon my face.
I touch the cross.
I worry about the people who don’t believe.
I cry when I think about Jesus on the cross.
I am a child of God.
I understand the Bible.
I say to myself “ I Believe”.
I dream of being with the Lord someday.
I try to picture Heaven.
I hope that I can help others.
I am a child of God.