   I'm looking out my window, popping ibuprofen over my morning coffee, and I'm amazed. Fat, wet snowflakes are racing down to the world. Maybe it's the hangover, maybe it's my current worried-dramatic mood....but it's beautiful none the less.Gloriously dazing, world consuming and memory jolting. I stood with my arms open in winters cold embrace and remembered. The countless winter days, under too many layers- sweat freezing to my young skin. Dancing, rolling, falling, and laughing in mounds and mounds of snow. Joyous days long gone, smiles disappeared from my lips.But todayTODAYI got it.I fucking got it, I grabbed it- I held it.I reveled in the memories and age couldn't hold me.Bruised my foot, damnit. Covered in snow and rolling through the heaps of wet huge snowdrops. Laying in my own snow angel, I lost it again. But I smiled.For one brief, shiny moment I was that snot nosed kid again. Wearing too much pink (thanks mom), my mop in a mess and flying everywhere, gapped tooth grin open for the world. (thanks for the braces too)Sappy huh?I laid there and was buried under flowing drops of nostalgia. Gods...I was happy for that instant. Now...well, I'm still smiling. And under 3 blankets, sniffly, and laughing at myself. Think my little outing will help my cold?I'm in a mood, I'm not ecstatically happy...not anymore. But, I'm not miserably depressed anymore either. Content...I haven't been here in so long, almost missed what it truly was. Feels good. cruelestofsmiles (© 2005) aka Mandy |
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