The Goon's Journal (original) (raw)

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Saturday, May 24, 2014

6:28AM - Where is he now?

Lots of shit has changed since I gave a damn about this place. Let's consider this place a permanent monument to the stupidity of myself. I am the boss at work now, and I don't mean some manager at a Burger King. Nope, I'm a supervisor at LAI International, and couldn't be happier with the turns life has taken. People respect me, people look up to me. More importantly, my team and I get the job done and, even though it can be stressful, we have a shitload of fun doing so.

It's been, what, 10 years(?) since Heather dumped me. None of it has mattered since forever. I could go on forever about how much she pissed me off in the end, but whatever. Fuck it, I don't care. I've dated a few others since then, but am not currently in a relationship. Furthermore, I don't care to be in one. I have discovered that relationships are stupid. I am far better off as the detached party boy that everyone has come to love.

Still the punk rocker I've always been. Hell, I still am very much at part of the Twin Cities punk scene. I've become more of an oogle as of late (Google it if you don't know what an oogle is), and am writing songs and playing music and couldn't be happier.

And a sadder note, I lost communication with Anthony (LJ's casualtiesfan) and Nate Chambers around 2008-2009 ish. Tragically, I found out from Nate when I ran into him again late last years that Anthony had been in a serious accident and passed away in 2011. It was hard to take. But Nate is still as punk as he ever was, and I'm glad that, of my old punk crew, he's the one who stuck around. Hell, I've even gotten Dale's siblings into the punk scene. Quite a feat, all things considered.

Heather and Dale are my friends, but they are more like siblings than anything. A good place for them, too, because I can always use another brother and sister.

I am on top of the world, and nothing else matters. I have never been more happy or comfortable with my life than I am right now.

So goodbye Livejournal. This is the Reverend Goonie MacPunkerson and his Reckless Noise Symphony signing off. Cheers!

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

11:10AM - No subject

Holy fuck! I just re-discovered this. I almost forgot how young I was once. Too much shit has happened since I last posted here. How about we just let this whole "livejournal" thingy die? My life has finally reached an equilibrium, and I am truely happy where I am. You can find me, mostly, over at RationalWiki these days under the name "Gooniepunk2010." Otherwise, don't ever expect me here, as I have grown waaaaaaaay beyond the stupid pissing contests that we used to have here with Justin, Brittany, Josh, Heather and all them. I can't believe how young I used to be. Perhaps, in time, I will bury this whole fucking journal into the "delete" folder of the internets.

Monday, April 27, 2009

6:44PM - Finally Letting Go.....

You know, I have never been someone who forgives and forgets. Usually, I stew over something for long periods of time until I finally forget about it. In some cases, obviously, I can never forget about given thing. For example, this journal was started for the sake of hurting those who were hurting me. Asshole Justin, Bitch Brittney, and Judas, err, Josh the Traitor were three people I have had a vendetta against for some time.

It waned a little after I cut them out of my life (while tricking them into thinking they were cutting me out of their life). In fact, the whole time after Josh's betrayal, I got him to do exactly what I wanted him to do, all the while looking like the passive one. I pushed him into cutting off the friendship, even though he made it look like he did it himself. I showed him, Justin, and Brittney for what they were: turncoats, liars and traitors. I didn't show it to them, as they were too blind to see. Rather I showed myself, Heather, and my loyalists (Sam, John, and the like) to secure my standing with them. But after I cut them out of my life, I tried to forget them. And, after Heather and I got "re-acquainted" after leaving Josh's, the only thing they left was the psychological damage that still haunts me: the paranoia and the depression. But they were nothing to me.

After Heather left, however, I went mad. THEY were, in some twisted way, back in my life. I can't even tell you with words, even, how their betrayal crept back into my mind, even though they were gone for some time. I was, admittedly, insane at that point in my life.

However, after a personal re-birth, of sorts, I have returned to the person I once was before they twisted the knife into my back. Thanks, in part, to my band mates and, specifically, to Apathy, I have re-learned how to forgive and forget. Apathy is someone who, in my opinion, should have all the rage in the world in his heart. His mother abused and beat the shit out of him numerous times, and Apathy has a lot of "baggage" as a result. But does Apathy act withdrawn and angry, like I do? No, instead he still tries to keep life on the positive side of things. He still allows himself fun, and does not, really, dwell on vengeance. He has, inadvertently, taught me how to move on.

So, I can now declare that I have, finally, moved on. I have now forgotten those horrible, wretched people and all that they did. I have been able to push their lies, their betrayals, and their fuckery into the deepest realms of my mind, and locked it up with all the other horrid memories of my life. I will no longer dwell on them or their ilk, except when I feel like puking. Is this forgiveness? I can't say for sure. But, you know what? It's as close as those people will ever get to forgiveness from me.

In the meantime, I've grown up a lot since I started this journal. Fuck, this was originally set up to fight with some stupid fuckers I mentioned above. In truth, I don't care anymore. I've let go. This journal was a testament to the fact that I had a girlfriend. I still don't anymore, but that's okay. My life is where I want it to be: I've gt a band (of sorts) now which I will focus on, I've got a great job, I live on my own. Times have changed for the better. I am a man now. I am still myself, of course: funny, punk, angry, passionate, a good friend to have, love-able, hate-able, fill-in-the-blank. But I think the time to move beyond the past lies here. So here it starts. My livejournal is over. I have closed this window and opened another. I may still come back, for old times' sake. But this journal has lived beyond its lifetime.

So, to anybody who finds this, feel free to look back at those years of my post-teen lifetime and learn from them. I coped with tons of shit which was posted on here, and I learned a lot from those things. But, now that I have those tools, I no longer need this artifact to them

Good bye all. You can still find me on facebook and myspace, of course. But I am taking a permanent vacation from this monument to times, dreams, hopes, worries, and troubles from the past.

-Gabriel "The Goon 2005" Holl

Current mood: calm

Monday, February 16, 2009

4:32AM - Journal Goes Dormant, again..

Now that Obama is in power, I have no other reason to continue this journal. So, once again, this live journal will go dormant until/unless bigger things happen.

I will exit with a tribute to Lux Interior of The Cramps, who passed away a few days ago.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

2:38AM - The End Of The Error!!!!

Bush is gone, now. Lord and Lady, I ask that you bless Barack Obama, and allow his vision of one, unified people be realized!!! Good luck, Obama! May you help heal this nation from the embarrasment of the last 8 years! Yes We Can!!!!

Current mood: hopeful

Monday, January 12, 2009

9:46AM - You Think You're Alive Motherfucker?!!!

Again, I'm just posting out of my own personal insanity, but this is fucking awesome!!! I found a video that de-codes Stza's Backmask at the beginning of the Choking Victim song "Hate Yer State". Check it out!!!!

That's so Stza-esque.

Friday, January 2, 2009

7:24PM - Fresh Posts Coming Soon....

Even though I promised I wouldn't post anymore (and even though nobody actually reads this anymore), expect some fresh posts coming here soon in light of the election of my guy: Barack Obama!!! I know, I know, his whole "Change" thing is probably false hope, and I know he isn't quite liberal enough for me. But, even I can't help but feel hopeful that he will finally undo the error that was Chucklenuts Bush and Darth Cheney. After all, after 8 years of going backwards, we have only to go forwards.

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

3:25AM - Okay, fine. THIS will be my FINAL, FINAL POST!!!!

To ALL so-called Christians, and especially the ones that fucked with Heather's and my relationship way back when:

Eat that with a grain of salt. I am sick of you judgemental Christians trying to tell me how to run my life, and which Gods/Goddesses to worship. I will never again be a part of that religious cult.

Friday, February 29, 2008

10:58AM - Final Post

Seeing as how none of my friends update anymore, and seeing as how I don't update anymore, this livejournal is pretty much over. Sorry everyone.

Friday, January 4, 2008

2:17AM - Shut Down The SOA!!!

Different name, same shame!!! Shut down The School of Assassins (School of the Americas). For more information, go to www.soaw.org

Sunday, December 30, 2007

2:01AM - New Ink!!!

I have a kick-ass new tattoo on my left arm. It's a skull with a snake wrapped around it, that I got at Minneapolis' best tattoo shop: Twilight Tattoo. I am fucking impressed with it, and happy. I'm also thinking of getting another in a couple of months. Anyways, just thought I'd blog about it (not like anyone is reading this anyway).

Thursday, December 20, 2007

12:44PM - Too much money???

That's right, for the first time in my history, I have too much money on hand. This happened only because of the fact that I am too much of a workaholic to have time to spend anything. This coupled with the influx of cash from my new job, and compounded by the promotion I just got have caused me to have tto much money for once. Which is a good thing.

Needless to say, I finished my Yule shopping (having spent some 450onfamily)andIstillhaveabout450 on family) and I still have about 450onfamily)andIstillhaveabout2000 in the bank. This makes me happy, because I have enought o pay the balance of my tuition and still have some left over. Now, it's what I plan on doing with the balance that is the question. And, no, I won't give it to anybody (so don't bother asking!!!). Perhaps, some new tatts and piercings are in order?

Now, all I need is a girlfriend, and my life will be complete. But the girlfriend is just wishful thinking. Besides, as I have said before, until this March, I won't even have the time for a girlfriend. AFter that, however, it will be time to find "the one and only" that my life is missing.

By the way, before I go, I have decided to dye my hair this coming vacation. I just haven't decided on a color.

Peace,
-Gabriel

Thursday, December 13, 2007

1:00PM - Things Still Are Looking Up

I cant' wait!!! Only 3 more months, and I will do something none of my siblings (Derek excluded, because he's still in High School) are even close to doing; graduating college!!! I am soooo excited it hurts!!! I love Dunwoody, and I think after this quarter, I'll take a quarter and simmer off, then I'll go back for my welding certificate, since it would complete my metalurgy knowledge.

On top of that, I have been promoted, by default, at LAI. Since they started restructuring their employment, I will be the most experienced person working in the GE Energy sector. I am happy, but very nervous, since I still have a lot to learn (including stuff I don't know I need to learn). What will suck is that fact that I will have to make management-type decisions on the spot, and I'm not good at that. Oh well, I can adapt. Besides, I LOVE MY JOB AT LAI!!! And now that Alex (our lowest common denominator) will be taking a promotion and leaving GE sector to those of us who actually work, we might be able to meet our numbers, which equals BIG bonuses at the end of the month. Also, I will be learning in the next few months how to program the machines in GE (which isn't at all easy, lots of complex G and M codes) so that I can make adjustments as needed.

Anyway, that's life right now. On December 23, I will be going to the Amnesty International benefit show at the Triple Rock (which will be a mostly ska-type show, so no stupid TCSP or bands that scream inaudible shit through a microphone) to support a worthy cause, as well as to support local music. Chicken Poodle Soup will be there, too. All I need to know is this: WHO WANTS TO GO WITH ME?

Let me know by phone or whatnot.

---Gabriel

Monday, December 10, 2007

9:08AM - My Ideal Woman....

My ideal woman would be one who enjoys the following:

Has and/or doesn't mind piercings and tattoos.

Likes/ doesn't mind punk/goth/metal music.

Not intolerant of "different" things, such as other religions.

Enjoys getting the occasional, unsolicited flowers, especially roses and lotuses, and other gifts without reason.

Not too much of an organization freak.

Doesn't mind doing oddball things just for the sake of doing oddball things.

Cares more about what's on the inside, instead of the outside (as I am hideous looking).

Not afraid to keep me in line.

Will worship me, and allow me to worship them in exchange.

Enjoys cuddleing and snuggleing and taking naps and sleeping together (and I actuall mean sleeping together, not sex)

Wants a manly man (as opposed to some girly guy) with facial hair and a manly build.

Not afraid to have a guy who will treat them like a goddess.

And must have a generally good, caring, loving heart.

If anybody who reads this meets all or most of these requirements, please drop me a line. Also, I should add that I hold myself to similar standards, so your not meeting anything I am unwilling to meet, as well.

Current mood: lonely

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

10:35AM - I know the yellow crayon, and I'm NOT kidding!!!!!

It is true, of the three Hardcore Crayons, I know the yellow crayon from Dunwoody. We're not so much friends as we are aquaintances. The yellow crayon is an ASRO student, and I'm a machinist student. No joke. The yellow crayon is a cool guy. I haven't met the orange or green crayons, so I don't know what they're like. But, I'm a fan of yellow. (For more information, look up the Hardcore Crayons on myspace)

Anyway, I am so fucking tired right now that everything is running completely slow. It's like this day's minutes are, themselves, days. This week is just fucking dragging on, and I'm so tired of working 3rd shifts. I can't wait until next week, so I can be back to regular sleep.

Anyway, back to thinking about crayons.

-Goon

Friday, November 9, 2007

9:13AM - Good times...

So, I get to work a week of 3rd shift next week. Oh boy, WHAT FUN!!! I'm gonna hate that, if only because it means I will have to split up my precious sleep schedule, as if I'm not always exhausted during the week. AMP energy, please be my savior. lol.

Anyway, I'm sitting here in Quality Systems class, the most boring class ever conceived by Lord and Lady, and I just thought I'd post something to keep me from passing out. And if Dr. Frank Wells doesn't shut up about food (he uses breakfast food in examples of quality control), I think I may just punch him out and then walk to Perkins.

So very hungry, so very tired. No time to eat, no time to sleep.

-Gabriel

Current mood: sleepy

Sunday, October 28, 2007

3:41AM - The greatest pick-up line ever....

Since I have been in pursuit of a particular welder chick at Dunwoody for a while, I came up with a perfect pick-up line at dinner tonight:

So, welding involves melting metal together, huh? Well, that shouldn't be hard, since you've already melted my heart.

What do ya think?

Friday, October 5, 2007

10:19AM - Wrecking Things, Breaking Shit...... And Tattoos

Well, it's Friday, and I can't wait until school is done today. Why? Well, let me explain.

First, I get to work on developmental parts at work tonight. This is great, because I, basically, get to break the rules and fuck up these parts all I want, because they aren't going to be sold (they're for R&D, afterall). I won't need backstrike protection or "proper fixturing" or anything, and I won't even need to be careful with them. It's like a demolition derby, except not with cars but with machining parts.

Second, I get paid this week. Another 900−900-900−1000 for spending for the next 2 weeks. What's great about this is that I have no financial obligations this time, so I think I might finally do something constructive and get some new tattoos and peircings. Fucking awesome.

Anyway, back to school.

-Goon

Friday, September 28, 2007

10:31AM - Finally, A Weekend to Myself...

Only 13 more hours to go before my first 2-day weekend in forever. I'm still completely undecided as to whether or not I want to go with Vince, Chris, and Nate (3 guys from work) to the Northern Wisconsin Death Metal Fest. But, I have until the end of my shift at work to decide (and I'm at school right now). If not, I'll probably get in touch with Sam so we can negotiate our plans to get a place together. I will also be catching up on some much-needed sleep!!!

Either way, I have no clue what I'm going to do this Sunday. Perhaps (as I've been floating the idea around), I will see if Dale and Heather want to go hang out and watch the Packers kick the shit out of the Vikings at some yet-to-be-determined sports bar. I don't know, I just love the fact that I have money now.

Anyway, that's all I got.

-Gabe out.

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

10:47AM - The Quest for a Girlfriend Continues... (maybe)

This coming week is the "Fall Fling" party at Dunwoody. Why am I excited? Two words: Welder Chicks!!! Hopefully, I can meet a few and "mingle" with them. Hehehe. Hey, I've been single for a while, and I think it's about time I meet someone special, again. My only constraint, at this point, is time. Between working and school, I only have my precious weekends. Oh well, at least I'll have money the next time around.

Anyway, the good thing about welder girls is that most are either punk chicks or goth chicks. And, let's face it, I only date people with some sub-cultural affiliation. Hopefully, some of them are single. But, anyway, I should go back to work. I'll post more later.

-Gabe

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