WOMAN AND THE MARRIAGE LAWS. - TO THE EDITOR OF THE DAILY TELEGRAPH. - The Daily Telegraph (Sydney, NSW : 1883 - 1930) - 26 Apr 1892 (original) (raw)
to the editor of the daily tkij5grafji.
Sir, — Since hitherto — with the exception
of tho Rev. Georgo Walters — Mr. Frank
Cotton and Miss Scott havo been tho only
opponents of my views who havo neither
sheltered thomsolveB weakly behind a voil of
anonymity nor descended to vulgar personal
abuse, I havo pleasure in dealing with a few
of the arguments advanced by them on Sun'
day night at tho Brighton-hull — Miss Scott
as lccturcss, Mr. Cotton as chairman —
especially as their remarks were rnude in that
spirit of temperance and courtesy -without
which any discussion must either fall fruit
less or degenerate into an undignified
quabhlc, as unedifying to outsiders as to the
The curious part of the affair, and one
which proves the broadness of the subject in
hand, is that I can endorse almost every
word my supposed opponents uttered ! They
argued for me better lhau they knew. Of
course this may arise partly from the fact
that both kept to lofty generalities, instead of
descending boldly into the controversial
arena and dealing practically with the pro
blems and questions raised in my lecture-
problems which will absolutely have to bo
taccd us time goes on, as woman gradually
uchicves her economic and jiolitical indepen
dence. It is so easy to appeal to human
nature by moral " catchwords — such a much
moro thankless task to urge people to dis
card "catchwords" and live by the light of
their reason and conscience only. To Miss
Scott, for whom I have a warm regard and
esteem, her somewhat Utopian views of life
and social obligations are not " catchwords,"
her beautiful earnestness makes them a
living reality. But the weakness of her posi
tion, as set forth in her leetnre, is manifested
chiefly in her evident tendency to regard
certain instincts in our nature as " common
and unclean" and others as vory Cno and
noble, instead of regarding all as making np
a "wondrous wholo,"and recognising the
equal necessity for an outlet for material
os well as spiritual energies.
Mr. Cotton, in his opening speech, said
that " He disagreed with a great deal that
Mrs. Ashlon said and placed manly honor
and womanly virtue under a control higher
than that of any Act of Parliament.
rior did ho believe that the retention or
abolition of any Act would effect reform iu
our social life." Mr. Cotton is merely re
peating them in slightly different words to
my owa — that marriago laws anddivorceacta
arc superfluities which, if swept away, would
leave society in just the same condition us it
was when hampered by them on all sides J
Ib not the fact that " manly honor and
womauly virtue are undor a control higher
than that of any Act of Parliament " what I
havo been trying to prove all along? Is it
not for that reason that I have urged Karl
Pcarson'B doctrine — that in a civilised com
munity "tho sex-relationship, both as to
form and substance, should be a pure ques
tion of taste, a simple agreement between a
man and a woman, in whicb, except in tbo
matter of children, neither society nor the
State have a right to interfere?' If Mr.
Cotton's opposition on most topics is no more
formidable than that contained in arguments
like these, I can only say, " May Ji never
Miss Scott said, " If marriage laws were
abolished altogether no true woman would
give herself to a man without love." I
need not point out that if Miss Scott wore
arguing for instead of against my views, sho
could not have dono so in better words than
these. Woman would, -with her innate sense
of modesty and refinement, be, under anv
circumstances, "a law unto herself." This 1
absolutely insisted upon in my lecture. Miss
Scott agrees, aud yet couuot persuade herself
to follow out her argument to its logical con
clusion. She prefers instead to believe that
a woman could do without laws, and yet if
she hadn't them she would go wrong imme
diately. Such a Hibernian method of rea
soning hardly calls for gounucut. Again,
Miss Scott misconceives, though I am sure
not wilfully, my words about "ideals." Sho
will remember that I was particularly care
ful to add iu my lecture, after quoting
Bernard Shaw's assertion that " whole
basketsful of our common ideals about
women must go." " It is hardly necessary to
remark that tho writer refers, not to self-
constituted aud individual duties and ideals,
but to those imposed from outside by custom,
society and tradition." We do well to keop
our ideals, but let us he sura they are our
own, and not those forced upon us by other
Two more points in Miss Scott's lecture
ore sadly contradictory. In the face of hor
main theory that " if we were all good wo
could do without law," she says that
philosophers like Mr. Donistkorpo and Mr.
Karl Pearson, who are endeavoring to break
down marriage laws as tlioy stand, are
" legislating, not for the highest product of
civilisation, but down to tliat typo hardly
removed from the animal." Mr. Karl Pear
son, then, who holds so strongly the theory
that tho higher type of man or woman,
capable as he or she is of self-restraint and
self-guidance, uceds not the outer law, is,
according to Mis3 Scott, directing his energies
to the mad task of binding those who need
no fetters and setting frco those who are the
most likoly to abnso their liberty.
As regards the children, I think those who
heard my lecture will agree that the stress I
laid on the rights of children was great and
urgent; tnat l upnoia nomo mo lor tnem,
except whero au unhappy marriage between
the parents rendered home influence unde
sirable, and that my deprecation of a " love
less marriage" was not only as strong as that
expressed both by Miss Scott and Mr.
Cotton, but that the mercenary element in
marriage was the evil, of evils at which I
directly aimed throughout.
That poople iu an intelligent and thinking
community should construe my words into
an advocacy of a return to savage conditions
never struck me. I had imagined myself
living iu a more enlightened and a purer
atmosphere. I do not pin my faith to Mr.
JCarl Pearson, John Stuart Mill, nor Mr.
Wordsworth Donisthorpo, neither do I sup
pose life perfect, nor public morality faultless
in tbo flaytian Republic or the German
States. My proposals wero rather tentative
tban fimil, and might, had they been taken in
the spirit of frankness aud confidence in
which they were given, havo openod a free
and interesting discussion on one of tho most
important topics of our time. — Yours, etc.,