When the Love Is Bad (original) (raw)

Modern popular theories of emotion distinguish between loves: there is true love and puppy love, parental love and child love, friendly, Platonic love, the love for and of our pets, the love for and of non-human others. What is often considered a different category all together are states like obsession, lust, the desire for domination, the laser focus of an abuser on their victim. These series of emotional states are set over and against love: they are false loves, they masquerade as the real thing but deep down have their origin in violence and hatred, misogyny and rage. These states provoke a common response in champions of love: they are not real love. But what if these vicious states are kinds of love? What if they come from the same place from whence the purest of loves springs? What if they are, in fact, forms of Bad Love? This chapter provides a selective philosophical history and analysis of "bad love" in several of its myriad forms. The methodology used for this analysis is gleaned from feminist theory, the history of emotions, and the moral psychology of Augustine of Hippo. There are two major sections of this essay: "When Love Was Bad," provides a brief background on the philosophical history of "bad love." Beginning with Platonic "bad love," this section swiftly turns to Augustine's analysis of love and emotion. The second major section, "Bad Love, Revisited," synthesizes Augustine's account of emotion with Susan Brison's feminist philosophical account of the effect of trauma on the psyche. The chapter concludes with a reexamination of Platonic negging and Augustinian emotion, thus reaffirming the slipperiness of Bad Love. This essay contributes to the philosophical literature on the history of the emotions as well as philosophy of love.