‘The Meaning of the Child to the Parent: The Development and Validation of a new method of classifying parenting interviews for the nature of the parent-child relationship’, PhD thesis, London: University of Roehampton (original) (raw)

Abstract

sparkles

AI

The study explores the development of a new procedure for classifying parenting interviews that examine the perceived meaning of children by their parents. It investigates how parental narratives shape parent-child relationships, grounded in attachment theory, aiming to provide insightful analysis for informed interventions in parenting dynamics. The research employs semi-structured interviews to uncover the meanings that parents attach to their children and the implications of these meanings on the parenting experience.

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References (216)

  1. ASSESSED?! Self!Report!Questionnaire!or!Interview?! One!simple!way!to!assess!a!parent's!perception!of!their!child!and!their!parenting!is!through! a! questionnaire.! ! There! are! a! number! of! questionnaires! available! to! examine! a! parent's! generalised!conscious!views!about!parenting,!and!even!their!child!(e.g.!the!Parenting!Stress! Index,!Abidin!1997).!!However,!whilst!these!are!useful,!they!are!inadequate!for!the!task!in! hand.!!This!is!because:! Questionnaires+assess:+ Conscious%Memory:!What!we!are!currently!aware!that!we!know.! Semantic% Memory:! The! general! conclusions! we! have! drawn! from! our! experience:!how!we!think!things!"ought"!to!be.! What%we%are%prepared%to%admit:!!General!statements!are!easier!to!falsify!in! the!context!of!assessment,!to!look!better!than!we!are.! What%we%say%when%we%do%not%feel%particularly%pressurised%or%stressed.! The+Meaning+of+Child+is:+ Specific!to!the!relationship!between!parent!and!child.! May% have% elements% we% are% not% conscious% of,! or! not! always! aware! of! (e.g.! many!aspects!of!relationships! are! procedural!-! learned! habitual! behaviour,! or! contain! feelings! that! we! are! only! aware! of! in! certain! situations,! such! as! times!of!stress).! May%be%related%more%to%how%things%are,%than!how!we!think!they!are!or!ought% to%be.! May% have% elements% we% don't% want% to% admit! but! which! perhaps! could! be! revealed!in!a!process!that!is!more!inPdepth.% May%have%elements%that%only%emerge%when%we%feel%threatened%or%anxious:!In! assessing! risk! in! relationships,! we! want! to! assess! not! just! what! happens! when!things!are!going!well,!but!also!when!they!are!not.!Children!most!need! their! parents! when! distressed! or! anxious,! and! so! this! is! when! parenting! is! most!tested.
  2. In!the!first!months!of!life!memory!is!imaged!-!tied!to!the!senses!(images!of!sight,!sound,! touch,!smell!and!taste).!!For!example!the!voice!of!a!baby's!mother,!or!the!sensation!of! being!caressed!or!hit.!
  3. Even!when!interviewing!adults,!strong!images!(or!the!absence!of!them!when!they!might! be!expected)!usually!indicate!something!of!importance!and!are!looked!at!closely.!
  4. Images! tend! to! convey! information! about! situations! where! danger! or! safety! is! more! probable.!
  5. Secure!adults!tend!to!employ!lively!images!within!coherent!speech.!
  6. Adults!who!feel!threatened!by!their!children!may!use!negative!and!arousing!images!of! them.!
  7. Adults!who!are!unconnected!to!them!use!few!images!of!their!children!at!all,!or!idealised! images!of!a!'fantasy'!child.!
  8. Connotative!Language!(Crittenden!&!Landini!2011)!
  9. Connotative!language!is!the!use!of!language!to!influence!the!affective!state!of!listeners.!
  10. Artificial!language!serves!to!create!distance!from!the!child,!and!to!exclude!listeners!from! the!speaker's!feelings!about!their!child.! !
  11. Some!adults! cannot! understand!the!contingencies! in! relationships!(what!follows! what)! and!so!use!semantic!reasoning!to!justify!their!own!hostile!feelings.!Controlling!parents! will!usually!believe!that!the!child!is!to!blame!for!problems!in!their!relationship.!
  12. It!puts!together!both!the!temporal!order!of!events!(what!actually!happened!when)!with! affectPladen!images.!!It!involves!integrating!information!about!sequences!of!events!with! context!(sensory!experience)!
  13. Like! the! AAI,! the! PDI! often! alternates! between! questions! that! consciously! pull! for! episodic!and!semantic!memory:! P!What![generally]!happens!when![child]!is!upset?![Semantic!memory]!
  14. P! Can! you! tell! me! about! a! [specific]! time! last! week! when! [c.]! was! upset! [Episodic! memory]?% Reflective!Integration!
  15. Reflective! Integration! is! the! live! process! of! integrating! information! from! different! memory!systems!to!correct!distortions!and!find!new!and!more!helpful!meanings.! ! All!the!highPrisk!categories!suggest!a! pervasive!failure!to!take!the!child's! perspective,!either!seeing!the!child!in!a! hostile!and!very!negative!way,!or!failing!to! connect!with!the!child.! Clear!evidence!of!any!of!the!following:! ! semantic! statements,! which! ascribe! inappropriate! responsibility! to! the!child,!in!a!negative!way.!!It!is!coded!for!statements!where!any!of!the!following!apply:!
  16. Statements! that! give! the! child! responsibility! for! actions! that! the! adult! was! either! fully!or!partially!responsible!for.!!!
  17. Statements! that! seek! to! reduce! the! child's! actions,! or! motivations! to! the! negative! (this! is! called! 'Reductionist! Blaming! Thought'! in! the! Adult! Attachment! Interview,! Crittenden!&!Landini!2011).!"He%is%always%winding%me%up"%is!an!example!of!this!-!the! 'always'!reduces!the!child's!behaviour!to!that!which!intentionally!angers!the!parent,! and!the!statement!as!a!whole!blames!the!parent's!anger!on!the!child,!and!suggests! continual!hostility.!!
  18. Statements!where!the!parent's!expectations!are!not!age!appropriate.!!The!parent's! disappointment! betrays! expectations! of! the! child,! which! are! too! high! or! otherwise! inappropriate,!placing!an!unreasonable!burden!on!the!child!to!live!up!to!them.!
  19. !Statements! where! normal! age! appropriate! behaviour,! is! described! as! problematic! for! the! parent,! in! a! way! that! suggests! that! the! child! is! deficient! in! some! way.! The! child's!'deficiency'!is!perceived!as!causing!the!parent!particular!difficulties,!when!in! fact! the! evidence! would! suggest! that! such! problems! might! be! a! normal! part! of!
  20. One!parent,!when!asked!to!describe!her!relationship!with!the!child,!chose!the!word!'playful'! and!gave!the!following!descriptions!to!support!it:! ! Reflective!Integration! Reflective!Integration!is!the!live!process!of!integrating!information!from!different!memory! systems!to!correct!distortions!and!find!new!and!more!helpful!meanings.!!It!does!need!to!be! distinguished! from! Reflective! Functioning! (Fonagy! 2006,! Slade! 2005),! which! refers! to! the! parent's!ability!to!understand!behaviour!in!terms!of!its!underlying!mental!states.!!Whilst!the! two! concepts! are! related! (it! is! difficult! to! see! how! one! could! integrate! information! from! cognition! and! affect! without! the! ability! to! reflect! upon! mental! states),! the! parent's! understanding!of!the!child's!mentalising!is!primarily!classified!under!Episodic!Memory!in!this! system! (see! relevant! categories! above).! Reflective! Integration,! as! understood! here,! is! around!the!identification!and!correction!of!error.!!Its!importance!in!classifying!the!Meaning! of! the! Child! is! particularly! around! helping! distinguish! those! interviews! where! there! are! continuing! problems! and! potential! risk,! from! those! relationships! where! there! have! been! problems,! but! where! things! have! improved,! or! have! a! good! chance! of! improving! with! support.! ! In! coding! terms! this! means! making! the! distinction! between! the! High! Risk! and! Intervention!categories,!and!the!Intervention!and!Adequate!categories.! !within!the!interview.!!It!is!close!to!Mary!Main's!(1995)!original! concept!of!metaPcognitive!monitoring!-!thinking!about!current!thinking.!!Fresh!reflection!is! evidence! of! the! speaker! thinking! about! what! they! are! talking! about! in! the! interview! and! either! correcting! themselves! or! coming! up! with! new! insight! that! has! hallmarks! of! being! developed!in!the!present!(rather!than!either!borrowed!from!professionals,!or!recycled!from! ! CHAPTER!11
  21. The!overall!methodology!for!the!Meaning!of!the!Child,!and!the!assumptions!and!rationale! behind! it! are! outlined! and! explained! in! Chapter! 8! above.! ! This! chapter! deals! with! the! methodology!of!a!validation!study!within!the!quantitative!research!paradigm,!the!accepted! standard! within! the! field! of! researching! adult! and! child! attachment! relationships.! ! In! Chapter! 8! however,! it! was! noted! that! this! is! an! exploratory! study,! with! irreducibly! interpretive! elements! arising! out! of! the! nature! of! the! methods! used,! and! the! driving! purpose!and!intended!use!of!the!research!within!a!clinical!and!forensic!setting.!!Accordingly,! as!explained!in!Chapter!8,!a!more!interpretive!approach!is!offered!in!the!discussion!of!the! results! and! its! implications! in! Chapters! 13! and! 14,! following! the! statistical! analysis.!! However,! this! chapter! is! concerned! with! the! process! of! statistically! validating! the! classifications! yielded! by! the! Meaning! of! the! Child! in! relation! to! other! procedures! whose! p l e ! The!'Meaning!of!the!Child'!system!was!developed!whilst!the!writer!led!a!multi!disciplinary! team! carrying! out! assessment! and! intervention! in! cases! of! child! protection,! and! where! families! are! struggling! (usually,! but! not! exclusively! involved! in! the! family! justice! system).!! The! service! operated! as! part! of! a! voluntary! organisation! providing! services! to! families! in! three! settings,! day,! residential,! and! community! Children's! Centres.! ! This! service! ceased! in! 2012!owing!to!the!collapse!of!the!voluntary!organisation!itself,!but!the!work!has!carried!on! through!the!writer!and!colleagues!continuing!on!an!independent!basis.! ! considered!a!characteristic!primarily!of!the!parent!rather!than!a!particular!relationship,!and! so! can! be! assessed! in! the! AAI! as! well! as! the! PDI! (Fonagy! et! al.,! 1998,! Steele! et! al.,! 2008).!! Following! the! discussion! of! the! transmission! of! attachment! developed! in! the! preceding! chapters,! (see! especially! Figure! 1,! on! page! 110)! parental! RF! is! seen! as! a! mediating! factor! 'between'!the!AAI!and!the!Meaning!of!the!Child.!!However,!whilst!the!Meaning!of!the!Child! construct!is!intended!to!have!more!'breadth'!than!the!RF!scale,!for!example,!picking!up!on! the!affective!side!of!the!parentPchild!relationship,!and!specifically!addressing!conscious!and! unconscious! memory! systems! (see! Chapter! 9,! in! the! Coding! Manual),! the! concepts! are! related.! Convergence! is! seen! especially! in! the! construction! of! risk! as! level! of! simplification/distortion,!and!therefore!some!correlation!between!the!RF!scale!and!the!level! of! Sensitivity/Risk! in! the! PDI! is! expected.! ! If! these! theoretical! understandings! of! the! relationship! between! these! measures! is! correct,! the! Parental! RF! scale! will! be! related! to! CAREPIndex!Sensitivity,!but!not!so!closely!(Hypothesis!4).! establish! the! extent! to! which! the! validity! of! the! measure! can! be! generalised!beyond!its!immediate!context!(Creswell!2009).!!This!is!particularly!an!issue!for!a! measure! that! has! been! developed! with! an! 'at! risk'! sample.! ! Just! as! the! question! of! the! applicability! of! attachment! measures! developed! for! safe,! educated! and! advantaged! populations,! the! reverse! question! as! to! whether! a! measure! developed! by! looking! at! the! interviews!of!an!endangered,!struggling!population!can!say!anything!about!the!relationships! of!parents!living!in!safe!conditions.!!Part!of!the!purpose!of!the!measure!is!to!identify!risky! ! the! interview! is! classified! Adequate! or! Low! Adequate! (categories! 4,! and! 5),! then! although! the! main! relationship! pattern! remains! Sensitive,! a! 'negative'! pattern! is! also! classified! (in! parentheses).!!Where!the!Interview!is!classified!as!Intervention!or!High!Risk,!a!full!'negative'! pattern!(Controlling,!Unresponsive,!or!Controlling!and!Unresponsive)!is!awarded.!!In!other! words! increasing! Sensitivity! in! the! relationship! means! less! Control! and! Unresponsiveness! and! vice! versa.! ! Similarly! the! Controlling! and! Unresponsive! pattern! means! that! the! negativity! in! the! relationship! is! 'shared'! between! Control! and! Unresponsiveness! (for! example,! classifying! Unresponsive! and! Controlling! when! the! relationship! is! in! fact!
  22. For!this!reason,!it!is!considered!that!the!Meaning!of!the!Child!classification!implies!a!scale! for! Control! and! Unresponsiveness! in! a! similar! way! to! the! CAREPIndex! (where! a! total! of! 14! ! |!P a g e !347!of!461! ! 'points'! are! allocated! between! Sensitivity,! Control! and! Unresponsiveness),! although! in! a! more!rudimentary!/!less!precise!way.!!Where!the!Meaning!of!the!Child!Sensitivity/Risk!was! coded! Sensitive! or! Sensitive/Adequate,! then! the! interview! was! coded! 0! for! Control! and! Unresponsiveness.!!Where!the!interview!was!coded!as!Adequate!or!Adequate/Intervention! (and! so! a! partial! 'negative'! pattern! was! identified)! then! the! interview! was! scored! 1! for! Control!or!Unresponsiveness!(or!0.5!for!each!in!those!interviews!with!a!partial!Unresponsive! and!Controlling!pattern).!!Where!the!interview!was!coded!as!Intervention!or!High!Risk!then! it!was!scored!as!2!for!Control!or!Unresponsiveness,!or!1!for!both,!depending!on!the!negative! pattern! identified! by! the! interview.! ! This! allowed! for! correlations! between! Unresponsiveness!and!Control!in!the!Meaning!of!the!Child!to!be!compared!with!the!CAREP
  23. As!indicated,!the!CAREPIndex!scores!parental!Sensitivity,!Control!and!Unresponsiveness!on!a! 14Ppoint!scale,!with!points!being!divided!between!the!3!patterns.!!The!statistical!analysis!has! simply!used!these!scores!'as!is',!and!examined!their!correlation!to!the!Meaning!of!the!Child! 'scales'!for!Sensitivity,!Risk!and!Control,!as!they!are!assumed!to!function!in!the!same!way,! with!the!modifications!described!above!in!relation!to!Unresponsiveness!and!Control!in!the! Meaning!of!the!Child.! The! CAREPIndex! also! has! ratings! for! the! child! (Cooperation,! Passivity,! Difficulty,! and! Compulsivity).!!Because!the!Meaning!of!the!Child!specifically!assesses!the!parent,!and!also! because!of!the!differing!care!histories!between!and!within!the!samples,!these!scores!were!
  24. Similarly,! a! statistically! significant! relationship! between! the! Unresponsiveness! in! the! Meaning!of!the!Child!and!the!CARE!Index!was!found,!as!can!be!seen!in!the!statistics!in!Figure!
  25. A!statistically!significant!correlation!(coefficient!=!0.86,!p!=!0.000)!was!found!between!the! Risk/Sensitivity! classification! of! the! 'Meaning! of! the! Child'! (MotC)! and! parental! Reflective! Functioning!(RF)!within!the!whole!sample,!as!can!be!seen!from!Figure!23!below:! ! w i t h ! t h e ! C A R E 6 I n d e x : ! C u l t u r a l , ! G e n d e r ! a n d ! C o n t e x t u a l ! I s s u e s ! The! statistical! analysis! presented! above! does! show! that! the! study! has! been! able! to! demonstrate! what! it! set! out!to!show;!namely!that!it!is!possible!to! predict!the!nature!of! a! parent's!face!to!face!relationship!with!their!child!(as!measured!by!the!level!of!Sensitivity!in! the!CAREPIndex,!as!well!as!the!level!of!Unresponsiveness!and!Control)!by!the!way!in!which! the! parent! speaks! and! thinks! about! their! child! in! the! Parent! Development! Interview.! ! Of! course,! no! simple! causal! relationship! is! implied! by! the! correlations,! nor! indeed! by! the! theory.!!It!is!not!presumed!that!the!way!the!parent!speaks!about!the!child!in!the!Meaning!of! the! Child! causes! the! way! they! act! in! facePtoPface! play! in! the! CAREPIndex.! ! Indeed,! it! is! suggested! that! the! relationship! is! twoPway! (see! the! discussion! in! Chapters! 1! and! 7,! and! Figure!1%and%Figure!2,!pp.!110P115!above).!!The!level!of!agreement!indicated!in!the!results! provides!strong!evidence!both!for!the!validity!of!the!Meaning!of!the!Child!measure,!and!the! construct!it!measures.! The!link!between!the!Meaning!of!the!Child!and!the!CAREPIndex!was!demonstrated!with!both! fathers! and! mothers,! and! also! in! both! the! normative! and! the! 'at! risk'! samples.! ! The! relationship! between! CAREPIndex! Sensitivity/Risk! and! the! Meaning! of! the! Child! Sensitivity/Risk! was! a! little! less! strong! in! the! 'at! risk'! sample,! perhaps! reflecting! the! increased!complexity!of!these!interviews!and!CAREPIndexes!as!well,!but!given!the!stronger! relationship!between!the!negative!patterns!in!the!Risk!sample!(see!below),!the!issue!is!more! likely!related!to!the!question!of!who!the!child's!attachment!figures!are/were.!!Many!of!the! CAREPIndexes! undertaken! in! the! Residential! Assessment! were! done! shortly! after! the! child! ! the! relationships! are! struggling,! than! in! normative! dyads,! where! the! difficulties! in! the! relationship! are! less! marked,! more! 'diffuse'! and! 'diluted',! and! so! the! differences! between! control! and! unresponsiveness! is! less! clear! in! both! measures.! ! This! problem! may! be! exaggerated! by! the! smaller! size! of! the! normative! sample,! something! indicated! by! the! fact! that!the!problem!disappears!when!the!sample!is!considered!as!a!whole.!!As!already!pointed! out,! there! are! only! 7! out! of! the! 23! parentPchild! relationships! in! the! normative! sample! classified! as! 'Struggling'! (see! Figure! 36,! on! page! 365! above! and! discussion),! where! these! patterns!should!be!more!clearly!defined.!!Therefore!the!better!findings!for!Sensitivity!in!the! normative!sample,!and!for!the!'negative'!patterns!in!the!'at!risk'!sample!are!to!be!expected.!! The!purpose!of!the!negative!patterns!in!the!Meaning!of!the!Child!was!and!is!to!discriminate! between! different! kinds! of! struggling! relationships,! and! the! data! would! suggest! that! the! measure!has!achieved!this.!
  26. In!addition,!for!all!that!the!conceptual!coherence!between!the!Meaning!of!the!Child!and!the! CAREPIndex!the!systems!are!not!completely!comparable:!the!CAREPIndex!patterns!are!not!so! much! patterns! as! scores! (14! 'points'! are! divided! between! Sensitivity,! Control! and! Unresponsiveness),! whereas! in! the! Meaning! of! the! Child! the! establishment! of! a! clear! negative!pattern!(Control!or!Unresponsiveness)!places!the!interview!in!the!Intervention!or! Risk! category! (in! the! absence! of! clear! evidence! also! of! a! Sensitive! pattern),! and! a! partial! category! is! given! in! interviews! considered! Adequate.! ! The! question! of! what! is! the! main! pattern!in!the!CAREPIndex!is!less!easy!to!define.!! Furthermore,! there! were! coding! issues! with! both! samples:! the! US! sample! raised! issues! around! whether! the! cultural! tendency! towards! more! interventionist! play! with! babies! was! often! intrusive/controlling,! and! with! complex! 'at! risk'! interviews,! coder! agreement! on! !frequent!debate!for!example,!as!to!whether!intrusive!behaviour!on!behalf!of!the!parent!is! controlling!(by!which!it!is!felt!it!is!contingent!on!the!child's!behaviour,!and!so!functioning!in! a! punitive! way)! or! unresponsive,! in! that! it! is! unrelated! to! what! the! child! is! doing,! but! dependent!on!something!going!on!in!the!parent's!head.!!The!Meaning!of!the!Child!may!be! better!placed!to!shed!light!on!the!issue!than!the!CAREPIndex,!because!of!the!way!in!which!it! makes!visible!the!mind!of!the!parent,!but!of!course!ways!in!which!it!might!go!beyond!the! CAREPindex!can't!be!established!by!comparing!the!two!measures.! However,!these!statistical!difficulties!throw!up!a!wider!issue!as!to!whether!the!meaning!of! the!Unresponsive!and!Controlling!patterns!are!identical!in!both!measures.!!It!may!be!that!to! use!the!same!terms!is!misleading,!as!the!patterns!may!have!a!different!significance!in!each! system! (one! that! overlaps! rather! than! is! identical).! ! The! assumption! that! was! behind! the! Unresponsive! and! Controlling! patterns! in! the! Meaning! of! the! Child,! was! that! parents! who! seek! to! control! their! child's! behaviour! in! the! CAREPIndex! would! show! an! intense! but! negative!(either!hostile!or!needy!or!both)!connection!in!the!way!they!spoke!about!the!child.!! By!the!same!token!it!was!hypothesised!that!those!who!did!not!respond!to!their!child,!either! at! all,! or! in! any! way! that! was! related! to! the! child's! behaviour,! would! seek! to! distance! themselves!from!their!feelings!about!the!child,!and!the!feelings!involved!in!being!the!child's! parent.!!Regardless!of!the!statistical!difficulties,!the!progress!of!the!study!has!called!these! assumptions!into!question.!!! The!first!significant!exception!to!this!in!fact!became!apparent!early!on!in!the!development! of!the!coding!system!and!so!was!incorporated!into!it.!!There!were!a!number!of!interviews! that! were! markedly! and! undeniably! hostile! to! the! child,! where! the! CAREPIndexes! were!
  27. !Unresponsive,!or!Unresponsive!with!some!element!of!Control.!!These!interviews,! in! addition! to! showing! hostility,! tended! to! show! a! pattern! of! helplessness! and! of! having! given!up!in!some!way!in!being!an!effective!parent!to!the!child.!!!This!pattern!was!labelled!as! 'Controlling!Withdrawal',!because!it!appeared!that!the!parent's!lack!of!responsiveness!was! the! result! of! somehow! categorising! the! child! as! too! bad! to! be! parented! properly! (rather! than!the!more!common!pattern!for!extreme!unresponsiveness!of!idealising!the!child!as!an! 'almost!adult'!who!did!not!require!attentive!parental!care).!!This!pattern!once!identified!is! usually! coded! as! 'Controlling! and! Unresponsive',! because! it! is! felt! that! the! hostility! that! is! clear! in! the! interview! should! show! through! at! least! in! the! affect! dimension! of! the! CAREP Index! (which! deals! with! the! parent's! emotional! responses! to! the! child).! ! In! fact! the! CAREP Indexes!of!these!interviews!are!mixed;!in!some!cases!they!are!classified!as!almost!entirely! Unresponsive,!and!in!some!cases!partially!so,!as!predicted.!!Developmental!stages!may!play! a!role!in!this,!in!that!more!active!toddlers!may!provoke!conflict!with!these!parents,!which!is! not!apparent!in!parents!of!babies.!!Whilst!the!physical!aspects!of!caring!for!a!baby!may!be! distasteful!to!this!group!of!parents,!the!CAREPIndex!does!not!necessarily!demand!this,!as!it!is! play!based.!!This!kind!of!parent!may!simply!leave!the!baby!alone!or!make!token!efforts!to! engage!without!the!hostility!becoming!apparent.! In!addition!to!this,!another!pattern!emerged!from!the!process!of!classifying!the!normative! sample! that! is! not! currently! captured! by! the! Meaning! of! the! Child! system.! ! There! were! a! number! of! interviews! that! followed! the! Unresponsive! pattern! of! giving! idealised,! stereotyped! and! somewhat! clichéd,! affectless,! and! impersonal! accounts! of! their! child! and! their! parenting,! that! were! coded! as! predominantly! Controlling! in! the! CAREPIndex.! ! These! interviews!tended!to!exhibit!strong!and!somewhat!extreme!reactions!to!the!child's!negative! ! |!P a g e !377!of!461! ! affect! (for! example,! some! strong! exaggerated! images! or! negative! language)! that! might! suggest! the! parent! was! fearful! of! the! child's! negative! feelings,! but! no! other! controlling! discourse! markers! (and! within! a! pattern! that! was! idealising).! ! This! phenomenon! was! seen! both! in! extreme,! highPrisk! interviews,! as! well! as! in! interviews! coded! in! the! adequate! and! intervention! ranges,! in! a! less! stark! or! more! diluted! form.! ! It! was! these! interviews,! principally,!that!undermined!the!statistical!significance!for!Control!and!Unresponsiveness!in! the!normative!sample.! Further!work!would!be!needed!to!establish!this!and!test!it!out,!but!this!may!be!a!pattern! that! is! something! of! a! 'mirror! image'! of! the! Controlling! Withdrawal! pattern;! parents! who! seek! to! distance! themselves! from! the! child's! negative! affect! through! the! idealising,! distancing!pattern!in!the!Meaning!of!the!Child!(and!so!are!coded!Unresponsive)!but!who!in! their! facePtoPface! interaction! with! the! child,! especially! when! stressed,! can't! keep! this! up.!! Having!the!child!directly!in!front!of!them,!and!being!faced!(literally)!with!the!child's!negative! affect! (as! opposed! to! only! speaking! about! it! to! somebody! outside! the! relationship),! they! cannot!distance!themselves!by!not!responding,!but!rather!seek!to!actively!dismiss!the!child's! negative!affect.!!The!controlling!behaviour!of!these!parents,!may!not!serve!to!maintain!an! intense! or! needy! struggle! with! the! child! in! order! to! feel! close! to! the! child,! as! would! characterise! most! controlling! parentPchild! relationships.! ! Instead,! the! interviews! of! such! parents! suggest! that! the! controlling! behaviour! functions! to! dismiss! the! child's! negative! feelings,!in!order!to!distance!the!parent!from!the!negative!feelings!involved!in!parenting!the! child.!!! The!hypothesis!is!that!such!parents!would!be!classified!as!Type!A!in!the!Adult!Attachment! Interview! (see! the! account! of! the! AAI! attachment! patterns! in! Chapter! 9! above,! and! also! ! CHAPTER!14! P a t t e r n s ! The! statistical! analysis! of! the! Meaning! of! the! Child,! within! its! limitations,! achieved! its! purpose! in! providing! good! evidence! of! the! validity! of! the! Meaning! of! the! Child! as! a! procedure!to!identify!'at!risk'!parentPchild!relationships!and!discriminate!between!different! patterns!of!troubled!relationships!in!clinically!useful!ways.!!However,!at!the!same!time,!the! study! has! questioned! the! original! meaning! or! understanding! given! to! the! Meaning! of! the! Child!patterns!of!caregiving!(as!described!in!the!Coding!Manual,!Chapters!9!and!10).! At!the!outset!of!the!study,!the!categories!were!seen!as!an!extension!of!the!idea!of!parentP child!contingencies!that!is!central!to!the!CAREPIndex,!to!the!realm!of!parent!representations! of!their!child!and!caregiving.!!Put!simply,!in!the!CAREPIndex,!Sensitive!parents!are!positively! contingent! to! their! infants;! parentPchild! behaviour! is! connected! in! ways! that! make! things! predictably!pleasant!for!them!both.!!Controlling!parents!are!negatively!contingent:!what!the! child! does! displeases! the! parent,! and! what! the! parent! does! is! unpleasant! to! the! child.!! Unresponsive!parents!are!not!contingent:!their!actions!bear!no!relation!to!what!the!child!is! doing.!!In!the!Meaning!of!the!Child!manual,!the!notion!of!contingency!was!translated!to!the! idea! of! being! 'connected'! affectively! and! cognitively! to! the! child.! ! Therefore,! Sensitive! ! By! the! same! token,! some! Unresponsive! parents! are! desperately! committed! to! their! child(ren)! and! desperate! to! be! good! parents! to! them.! ! Their! selfPprotective! strategy! may! prevent! them! from! truly! knowing! their! child;! but! to! say! that! they! are! 'unconnected',! and! thus!by!implication!their!child!has!no!meaning!to!them,!is!misleading.!!Even!with!Sensitive! interviews,! this! characterisation! can! be! questioned! in! cases! such! as! Leanne,! discussed! below,! where! her! sensitivity! is! hard! earned! on! account! of! adverse! experiences! that! have! impacted! upon! the! relationship.! ! Leanne's! relationship! with! her! daughter! gives! her! great! pain,! as! well! as! joy,! as! a! result! of! the! pain! of! their! separation.! ! To! demand! that! the! connection!be!'positive'!distracts!attention!from!the!balance,!warmth,!and!perceptiveness! that!made!that!interview!such!a!sensitive!one.! Further! reflection! on! the! use! and! meaning! of! the! Meaning! of! the! Child! patterns! suggests! that! rather! than! being! a! positive/negative/absent! connection! distinction,! the! patterns! can! be!seen!on!a!continuum!between!distanced,!psychologically!unavailable!caregiving!on!one! side,! and! intrusive,! overly! close,! psychologically! enmeshed! caregiving! on! the! other,! with! Sensitive! caregiving! being! a! cooperative,! mutual! dialogue! that! occupies! the! balance! between!these!two!extremes.!!However,!in!talking!about!distancing!vs.!intrusion,!we!are!not! talking!about!the!parent!taking!over!the!child's!physical!space!or!withdrawing!from!it,!but! rather!the!mental!space!or!psychological!space!that!should!be!jointly!constructed!in!healthy! relationships.!!Building!upon!the!idea!of!the!'interPsubjective!space'!developed!in!Chapters!3! and! 7! above,! the! meeting! of! the! parent! and! child! is! seen! as! a! collaborative! or! nonP collaborative! dialogue! (LyonsPRuth,! 1999,! Beebe! et! al.,! 2012b)! that! arises! out! of! the! psychological!meaning!that!each!has!for!the!other!(see!the!discussion!around!Figure!2!from!
  28. In!Sensitive!interviews,!the!'coPconstructed'!interPsubjectivity!is!shown!in!the!interview!itself! as!well!as!the!parent's!relationship!with!their!child.!!Without!losing!awareness!of!her!own! feelings,! Leanne! took! the! interviewer's! perspective! throughout,! and! was! open! and! cooperative!in!her!discussion!of!her!daughter.!!At!times!she!moderated!the!intensity!of!her! feelings!by!distancing!language,!and!so,!far!from!distancing!herself!from!the!child,!or!being! overly!intense,!she!was!in!fact!regulating!herself!(and!protecting!the!interviewer)!in!the!face! of! her! very! strong! emotions.! ! In! this! way,! the! interPsubjective! space! between! the! interviewer!and!Leanne!was!created!between!them!in!a!cooperative!manner,!in!a!way!that! mirrored!Leanne's!relationship!with!her!daughter.! This!sensitivity!was!also!observed!in!the!CAREPIndex!video!taken!of!Leanne!with!Lizzie.!!The! video! showed! an! episode! of! pretend! play! that! was! beautifully! contingent! and! mutually! 'constructed'!between!parent!and!child.!!Lizzie!set!out!a!tea!set!for!her!toys!Elbie!and!Cattie.!! Leanne! was! encouraging! and! supporting! of! her! play,! naming! her! actions! and! offering! assistance! without! taking! over! intrusively.! Lizzie! searched! for! the! tea! spoons! and! after! a! failed! attempt! she! turned! to! her! mother! who! showed! her! "where! they! are! hiding! in! the! bottom!of!the!bag."!Lizzie!pulled!out!two!spoons!holding!one!in!each!hand!and!smiled!with! pleasure.! Lizzie! continued! to! play,! pretending! to! put! milk! in! each! cup! then! stir! each! one.!! Mother!suggested!she!put!the!tea!in!before!she!stirs!and!Lizzie!wafted!the!teapot!over!the! cups!and!imitates!the!sound!of!tea!pouring.!!This!pretend!play!sequence!continued!to!the! pleasure! of! both! Lizzie! and! her! mother.! ! Some! way! into! the! interaction! Lizzie! noticed! the! cameraPperson! in! the! chair! and! immediately! leaned! into! her! mother,! dropping! her! head! coyly.!Mother!cuddled!her!and!asked!if!Lizzie!is!feeling!shy,!offering!an!appropriate!mental! state! to! frame! her! behaviour.! ! Lizzie's! immediate! response! was! to! seek! comfort! from! her! ! Research!using!the!CAREPIndex!provides!some!validation!of!this!analysis!of!child!outcomes,! given! the! connection! between! the! two! measures! that! has! been! established! in! this! study,! particularly!in!the!understanding!of!troubled!relationships.!!However,!further!analysis!of!the! relationship!of!the!Meaning!of!the!Child!with!the!attachments!of!older!children!is!needed.!! For! example,! interviews! have! been! carried! out! with! parents! of! preschool! and! schoolPaged! children! in! conjunction! with! attachment! story! stems! (Emde,! Wolf! &! Oppenheim! 2003,! Farnfield,! 2009).! ! Analysis! of! the! relationship! between! the! two! would! not! only! allow! for! further!understanding!of!the!developmental!consequences!of!the!Meaning!of!the!Child,!but! also! allow! for! testing! of! some! of! the! hypotheses! around! different! attachments! in! large! families,! suggested! at! points! in! this! study.! ! These! hypotheses! arise! out! of! clinical! work! already!conducted!using!the!Meaning!of!the!Child!with!complex!families,!but!are!in!need!of! being!validated!by!way!of!a!properly!conducted!study.!!Similarly!work!carried!out!using!the! Meaning! of! the! Child! with! parents! of! older! children! using! the! Child! Attachment! Interview! (CAI:! ShmueliPGoetz! et! al.,! 2008)! and/or! the! School! Age! Assessment! of! Attachment,! and! Transition! to! Adulthood! Attachment! Interview! ! (SAA! and! TAAI:! Crittenden,! Kozlowska! &! Landini!2010,!Farnfield!et!al.,!2010,!Crittenden!et!al.,!2013)!would!also!assist!in!following!the! developmental!pathway!of!relationships!characterised!by!the!different!Meaning!of!the!Child! patterns,!and!assessment!of!risk!in!parentPchild!relationships.!
  29. Whilst! the! Meaning! of! the! Child! procedure! has! been! developed! within! the! field! of! attachment! theory,! and! so! the! focus! has! been! on! its! place! in! the! 'transmission'! of! attachment!from!parent!to!child,!the!origin!of!the!idea!came!from!studies!relating!to!Child! Protection,!and!in!particular!the!seminal!research!into!fatal!child!abuse!of!Reder!and!Duncan!! ! which!is!a!pattern!based!around!fitting!in!with!others!and!withdrawing!psychologically!(and! perhaps!might!be!more!associated!with!Unresponsiveness)?!! Clearly!more!data!is!needed!to!validate!these!hypotheses!or!suggest!alternatives,!and!help! develop! these! intuitions! from! experience! of! using! the! Meaning! of! the! Child! into! a! more! comprehensive!and!coherent!theory.!!Such!a!study!involving!the!AAI!and!the!Meaning!of!the! Child!may!require!more!constructs!or!more!complex!analysis!than!simply!comparing!the!AAI! patterns! and! those! of! the! Meaning! of! the! Child,! in! order! for! example,! to! understand! the! effects!of!more!recent!'trauma',!such!as!abusive!relationships!(which!are!not!always!picked! up!in!the!AAI),!or!child!specific!trauma/loss,!such!as!enforced!separation!from!the!child,!or! the!diagnosis!of!disability!(Oppenheim!et!al.,!2009,!Pianta,!Marvin!&!Morog!1999,!Solomon! &! George! 2000),! as! well! as! meanings! organised! around! dangers! in! the! 'wider'! family! and! social! systems! (Crittenden! &! Dallos! 2009).! ! As! has! already! been! observed,! whilst! central! organising! patterns! are! both! helpful! and! necessary,! part! of! the! aim! in! developing! the! Meaning! of! the! Child! has! been! to! develop! a! 'toolbox'! of! constructs! with! which! to! analyse! interviews! and! make! these! more! specific! meanings! visible! (as! is! apparent! from! the! case! examples!discussed!in!this!and!the!preceding!chapter).!!However,!the!initial!validation!of!the! Meaning!of!the!Child!procedure!and!construct!creates,!it!is!hoped,!a!valuable!opportunity! for! further! research! to! 'fill! in! the! links! in! the! chain'! and! perhaps! find! further! organising! concepts! that! help! understand,! in! a! more! generally! applicable! way,! the! process! of! 'transmission'!envisaged!in!Chapter!7,!and!visually!in!Figure!1!on!page!110!above.! !such!as!the!Meaning!of!the!Child,!the!'wider!web!of!influences'!can!also!be!seen,! and!their!influence!assessed.!!The!issue!is!not!the!source!but!the!nature!of!the!distortion,! and!the!way!in!which!the!'reality!gap'!impacts!upon!the!onPgoing!dialogue!between!parent! and!child.! It! must! not! be! thought! that! either! the! person! and! subjective! 'lens'! or! the! wider! systemic! 'lens'! is! a! better,! more! accurate,! or! a! more! healthy! view.! ! Each! can! be! corrective! of! the! other;! family! and! social! influences! and! meanings! can! be! corrective! or! ameliorating! of! problems!in!the!parentPchild!coPconstruction!of!their!relationship.!!Conversely,!as!we!saw!in! the!story!of!Leanne!discussed!briefly!above,!it!can!work!the!other!way!around.!!The!personal! connection! that! existed! between! Leanne! and! her! daughter,! led! her! to! challenge! the! powerful! meanings! given! to! her! relationships! by! her! family! and! the! outside! world,! and! brought!about!a!more!sensitive!and!loving!relationship!with!her!daughter!than!might!have! been! predicted,! had! her! status! and! social! position! not! been! challenged! in! the! way! it! was.!! The!'meaning!of!the!child!to!the!parent'!is!not!just!about!identifying!risk,!but!also!a!potential! catalyst! to! rePorganisation! and! change.! ! It! is! hoped! therefore,! in! enabling! this! 'biPfocal'! perspective!on!relationships,!that!the!Meaning!of!the!Child!can!make!a!useful!contribution! both!to!the!assessment!of!particular!children!and!their!families,!and!towards!understanding! the!influence!of!adult!patterns!of!selfPprotection!in!the!protection!and!nurture!of!children.!
  30. A! fuller! introduction! to! and! explanation! of! attachment! theory,! and! its! relevance! to! parenting! is! given! in! Chapter! 9! in! The! Coding! Manual,! focussing! particularly! upon! Crittenden's! Dynamic! Maturational! Model! of! Attachment! (DMM:! Crittenden! 2008,! Crittenden! &! Landini! 2011,! Farnfield! et! al.! 2010).! ! However,! much! of! the! literature! discussion! in! Section! A! is! based! upon,! or! makes! use! of,! the! system! of! classifying! Adult! Attachment! developed! by! Mary! Main! and! her! colleagues! (Main! &! Goldwyn! 1994,! George,!
  31. Ainsworth's!original!attachment!classifications!of!infants!in!the!Strange!Situation!(Ainsworth! et! al.,! 1978)! did! not! fit! infants! of! parents! in! 'Risk'! samples,! such! as! mentally! ill! adults,! or! families! in! child! protection! settings.! ! Main! and! Solomon! (1990)! developed! a! further! classification! of! 'disorganized'! to! include! children! whose! fear! of! their! parents! prevented! them! from! 'organising'! a! coherent! pattern! of! attachment.! ! In! adults,! the! 'disorganised'! pattern! is! thought! to! refer! to! adults! with! unresolved! trauma! or! loss,! or! those! whose! attachments!are!incoherent!and!cannot!be!classified!as!any!other!pattern!(Hesse!2008).!!For! this!reason,!the!system!developed!by!Main!and!colleagues!is!often!referred!to!as!the!ABCD!
  32. A! patterns! in! the! DMM! would! be! classified! as! fearfully! preoccupied! (Type! C)! in! the! ABCD! model!(Crittenden!et!al.,!2003).!!Crittenden's!approach!to!classifying!the!Adult!Attachment! Interview! (Crittenden! &! Landini! 2011)! incorporates! a! detailed! theory! of! information! processing! under! conditions! of! threat,! along! with! further! modifiers! (e.g.! depression,! reorganisation)! and! kinds! of! unresolved! trauma! (e.g.! dismissed,! preoccupied,! blocked,! hinted,!and!vicarious).!!These!constructs,!insofar!as!they!are!relevant!to!the!Meaning!of!the! Child!and!its!validation,!are!outlined!more!fully!in!Chapter!9!(the!Coding!Manual).! However,!as!some!of!Crittenden's!patterns!are!referred!to!by!name!in!the!discussion,!they! are! summarised! in! brief! below! (drawn! from! Crittenden! 2008,! 2010,! Crittenden! &! Landini! 2011):! TYPE!B!PATTERNS! B3:!!Individuals!using!Type!B!strategies!expect!safety,!nurture!and!protection!from!others.!! Adults!and!children!using!a!B3!strategy!are!balanced!in!their!use!of!cognitive!and!affective! information!in!relationships.!!They!do!not!need!selfPprotective!distortions!in!the!manner!in! which!they!perceive!themselves!and!others.! B162:!Individuals! using! a! B1P2! pattern! inhibit! negative! feelings! (affect)! more! than! B3,! but! remain!balanced!in!their!overall!perceptions.! B465:! Individuals! using! B4P5! patterns! exaggerate! negative! affect,! with! B4! occasionally! sentimental,!and!B5!somewhat!irritated,!but!both!nevertheless!are!essentially!balanced!in! their!integration!of!their!own!and!other's!perspectives.! TYPE!A!PATTERNS! A162:!!Individuals!using!A1P2!strategies!inhibit!negative!feelings!in!conditions!of!mild!threat! and! tend! to! distance! themselves! from! danger.! ! They! will! not,! however,! ignore! serious! threats!to!self!and!child.!!Adults!using!an!A1!strategy!tend!to!be!cool!and!business!like,!and! those!using!an!A2!pattern!may!be!more!socially!engaged,!but!somewhat!facile!in!respect!of! a! tendency! to! avoid! uncomfortable! situations! and! subjects.! ! These! patterns! are! not! associated! with! psychological! or! parenting! difficulties,! except! possibly! when! accompanied! by!trauma.! A3:! Individuals! using! the! A3! strategy! (compulsive! caregiving)! inhibit! their! own! negative! feelings! to! focus! on! accomodating! those! of! their! caregiver! or! attachment! figure(s).! In! childhood!they!tend!to!try!and!take!care!of!withdrawn!or!depressed!caregivers,!seeking!to! raise!their!carer's!arousal,!or!otherwise!enable!them!to!engage!with!the!world!and!function! more!protectively.!!As!adults,!they!are!prone!to!'rescue'!others!and!often!find!employment! in!professions!that!value!their!ability!to!meet!the!needs!of!others.! A4:! Compulsively! compliant! individuals! focus! on! anticipating! the! demands! and! requirements! of! powerful! others! and! seeking! to! 'fall! in'! with! them.! ! They! tend! to! be! watchful!and!careful,!ensuring!that!they!do!not!displease!those!upon!whom!they!depend.!! As!both!adults!and!children!they!tend!to!internalise!the!perspectives!of!powerful!people!so! as!to!always!'do!the!right!thing'!from!the!perspective!of!their!attachment!figures.!!For!this! reason,!they!make!themselves!overly!responsible!for!problems!in!relationships!because!(in! their!own!eyes)!they!did!not!do!this!well!enough.! A5:!A5! individuals! use! a! compulsively! promiscuous! strategy! to! avoid! emotional! intimacy,! whilst! retaining! the! companionship! of! others! through! physical! displays! of! apparent! intimacy.!They!are!indiscriminate!in!their!affections,!as!trust!is!not!needed!in!relationships;! indeed!it!is!specifically!feared,!as!such!genuine!intimacy!feels!dangerous.!!They!may!become! sexually!promiscuous!in!order!to!avoid!getting!close,!whilst!still!avoiding!(physical)!isolation.!! Although! the! strategy! cannot! fully! develop! until! adolescence,! with! the! onset! of! sexual! development,! it! is! seen! partially! in! adopted! and! fostered! children! who! preferably! seek! stranger!relationships!and!so!avoid!further!rejection!and!harm!from!trusted!adults.! A6:!!Individuals!using!a!compulsively!selfPreliant!strategy!aim!to!avoid!intimacy!altogether!by! meeting!their!own!needs.!This!achieves!a!level!of!selfPprotection!at!the!expense!of!isolation.!! Like! the! A5! strategy! it! is! only! fully! seen! postPadolescence,! when! the! necessary! selfP protective!skills!are!learned.! A7:! Delusionally! idealising! individuals! have! faced! severe! and! pervasive! danger! over! which! they!had!no!control.!!They!have!learned!to!protect!themselves!by!taking!on!the!perspective! of! their! abusers! so! completely! that! the! have! lost! sense! of! their! own! perspective! almost! completely.!!This!is!done!through!radically!(delusionally)!idealised!representations!of!their! attachment!figures!that!have!functioned!to!dismiss!their!own!negative!feelings,!which!would! have!been!extremely!dangerous!to!them.!!It!is!the!interpersonal!version!of!the!'Stockholm! Syndrome',!where!captors!so!identified!with!their!abusers,!upon!whom!they!depended!for! survival,!that!they!fought!against!their!own!rescue.!!This!pattern!only!develops!in!adulthood.! A8:!Individuals!using!an!A8!strategy!("externally!assembled!self")!have!so!lost!a!conception! of!themselves!that!they!have!built!up!their!'self!knowledge'!externally,!from!professionals,! case!files!etc.!!They!are!typically!adults!who!have!experienced!the!Care!system!as!children,! lacking!any!internal!reference!point!for!their!own!memories!and!experiences,!as!a!result!of! frequent!changes!of!carer.! TYPE!C!PATTERNS! C162:! The! C1P2! (threateningPdisarming)! strategy! involves! exaggerating! ones! own! negative! feelings! to! coerce! others! into! being! more! predictable.! ! This! typically! means! alternating! displays! of! angry! or! irritable! behaviour! with! excessively! vulnerable! or! 'coy'! submissive! displays,!to!placate!angry!responses!from!attachment!figures.!!The!combined!'pushPpull'!of! the! alternating! exaggerated! feelings! keeps! unreliable! and! unpredictable! caregivers! or! attachment! figures! available! through! locking! them! into! a! struggle.! ! The! 'odd'! number! C! strategies!focus!more!on!anger,!and!the!'even'!patterns!exaggerate!vulnerability.!!C1P2!is!the! normative! version! of! these! patterns,! and! such! individuals! are! often! more! controlled! away! from! their! attachment! figures! (i.e.! in! school! or! work! situations)! and! also! are! less! likely! to! push! their! relationships! to! the! point! where! they! break,! or! where! the! strategy! becomes! damaging!to!others!or!themselves.! C364:! "The% C3?4% (aggressive?feigned% helpless)% strategy% involves% alternating% aggression% with% apparent%helplessness%to%cause%others%to%comply%out%of%fear%of%attack,%or%assist%out%of%fear% that%one%cannot%care%for%oneself"%(Crittenden,!2010).
  33. Individuals!using!this!strategy!try!and!make!caregivers!more!attentive!to!them!by!continually! 'creating'!problems!and!needs!that!the!attachment!figure!is!required!to!'solve'.! C566:!The!C5P6!strategy!(punitively!obsessed!with!revenge!and/or!seductively!obsessed!with! rescue)!is!a!more!extreme!form!of!C3P4!that!actively!uses!deception!to!hide!their!strategy! from! others.! ! Those! using! a! C5! pattern! appear! cool! and! distanced;! powerful! and! 'unaffected',!yet!they!tell!their!story!in!such!a!way!as!to!draw!others!into!feeling!angry!on! their!behalf.!!They!therefore!mask!their!own!vulnerability!in!order!to!present!themselves!as! 'above'! the! feared! and! hated! other.! ! Adults! using! a! C6! patterns! present! themselves! as! in! need!of!rescue,!misleading!others!as!to!the!extent!of!their!anger,!so!as!to!draw!others!into! taking!up!their!cause!and!stepping!in!on!their!behalf.! C768:!"C7?8%(menacing?paranoid)%is%the%most%extreme%of%the%Type%C%strategies%and%involves%a% willingness% to% attack% anyone% combined% with% fear% of% everyone."% (Crittenden! 2010).! ! The! patterns! become! delusional! at! the! extreme,! with! the! desire! for! 'infinite! revenge'! (C7)! or! 'complete!paranoia'!(C8
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