Recomposing by sealle on DeviantArt (original) (raw)

Well i said things would happen after the sale and here is the first of those... and a continuation of things that happened during the Auction, SO CATCH UP 8D.

> > > >

But now we move onward to more things both sad and happy, and confused...... mostly confused.

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It had been two weeks. Two long and exhausting weeks and yet Cavan had begun to feel like he was just beginning to function again. Every now and then something she said, or something he saw would make him smile and he could almost forget everything and laugh again. He sighed, his face itched. Rubbing a hand over the stubble he turned to the big blood bay stallion he was leading. Reebok was one of the reasons he felt himself calming more and more in the past few days. The big horse gave him a butt, nudging him and twisting towards the paddocks he knew he was headed towards.

“Alright mate I get it, let’s go and let you run” He chuckled as Reebok snorted turning those big brown eyes on him and looking for all the world like he would never have suggested leaving his favourite person. Grasping the lead and shifting the stallions shoulder he swung back into his long easy stride as they passed down the lane and towards the paddock. Reeboks head lowered and he grunted to himself, chuffing with each step, ears pricked and enjoying getting out of the stable and into the sunshine. Cavan breathed deep, smelling the summer, warmth, grass, and the aroma of horse, but there was something missing. It took a moment, Eucalypt. It was missing that tang in the air that left your nostrils slightly tingling.

They rounded the turn and headed down towards the creek. Reebok saw some horses a few paddocks across and screamed at them, ears twitching and beginning to get antsy. Cavan smiled and coming back from his memories he set about steadying and asking the big bay stud to listen. Hearing an answering scream Cavan turned back towards the track and saw a big black horse trotting down the road towards them. Raising a hand to wave at the rider he smiled as Rebecca lifted her own in greeting. The big black beast, Gil, seemed to puff as they approached the turn and Rebecca drew him up far enough away to avoid any misbehaviour. Reebok was not as easy to settle and he fidgeted and squealed at the other colt, stomping and swishing his tail as Cavan held him firmly away.

“How was the ride?” Cavan asked, pushing the big bay head away as Reebok tried pushing him over. Rebecca smiled, reaching down to smooth her mounts inky black mane as the colt shot ugly looks at the people interrupting his workout. “Gil is doing well. We went further today and he barely broke a sweat, once he finishes losing this belly of his ill increase it but he still seems frustrated at our slow pace.” As if to emphasise this point Mormegil swung his hips around, turning his rump towards Reebok and making Rebecca spin him back around. “Are you taking Bok out for the afternoon?” When Cavan nodded and pushed the persistent stud away again she hesitated, glancing down at Gil before looking back up at him. “Would you like me to grab us lunch and meet me at the broodmares paddock so we can play with the foals?” Again her gaze dropped and she fiddled with her reins. “Sure, I’ll put Reebok out and then walk over.” Rebecca flashed one of her smiles at him and he couldn’t help but return it. Gil again decided that he had been waiting too long and moving off Rebecca turned him waved back at Cavan and then the pair trotted off, finishing their daily loop of the farm.

Reebok huffed, spraying Cavan’s shirt with mucus as he stared at the retreating colt before deciding he had scared him off and therefore needed praise. Groaning and rolling his eyes at the Stud’s antics he gave the bay a scratch on the withers, reducing him to a lip wiggling bliss before with another shove Reebok demanded they continue to his paddock.

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Cavan leaned on the fence, watching as the mares grazed peacefully. There was nothing like watching horses that gleamed with health, happy and relaxed, especially as their foals slept and played around them. He smiled, watching as the two bay foals romped, the handsome colt teasing and chasing the filly that tried to ignore him but ended up being tricked into playing his game. Chuckling to himself he turned as he heard someone walking towards him. Smiling again Rebecca jogged over, hugging him before turning to greet the big black mare that had come to welcome her. Watching her joke around and laugh as the mare gave her a friendly nibble causing her to be pushed away. Catching the big black mares excitement the other broods and foals perked up, watching as Morwen tossed her head, sending a wave of black flashing like a halo and with snort wheeled around. Lowering her head she collected her filly and the other mares and with a buck led the band for a joyous lap of the paddocks.

Rebecca turned, smiling and laughing at the sight of her horses to see Cavan staring at the big black horse, eyes now clouded and cheerful smile gone. Her smiled faded as she stepped towards him, instinctively reaching out and with a gentle hand on his arm she hesitated, and then decided. “You know you haven’t talked about it. I understand if you don’t want to, but it might…” she looked out at the mares “help.” Cavan turned to her, his gaze softening slightly, but the shadow remained. Batting away some bugs Rebecca took his arm and led him towards the shade. As they sat down, the grass threatened to obscure them from view and Cavan stared out into their swaying stalks. Elbows propped on his knees he brow furrowed as he systematically destroyed the blade of grass he was holding.

Rebecca grabbed the food out of her bag, sensing his need for time and it was as he was staring at the sandwich in his hand that he started to talk. “Test, well he was going downhill for a while. He got colic 4 times in a month and his condition was deteriorating despite what we tried to help him. After you came for the sale he seemed to be getting better, he had a week of health, he even seemed to gain some weight back and his joints weren’t as stiff.” Cavan shrugged, “I thought we might finally get something good, but within a week he was worse.” Taking a deep breath he gently set aside the food, reaching again for something he could worry at, frowning out at the horses that had once again settled down to grazing. “The vet recommended surgery as a last effort, but he was too weak and the chances of recovery… In the end I sat with him in his paddock. It was the nicest day we had in weeks, not a cloud in the sky. By then he looked awful, he had lost most of his condition and he didn’t even complain that I smelled like the other studs. I stroked his face as Jhon injected him and sat with him until the sun set. We buried him in his paddock under his favourite tree.” Lapsing into silence he threw the handful of grass fragments down in disgust.

“There was nothing you could have done more for him Cavan. It sounds like he needed to be let go, and there is nothing worse than keeping an animal in pain.” Reaching out she put her hand on his shoulder only to withdraw it as he tensed and stood. “No. There was nothing I could do, not for him, or for Frankie, Geoff and Tas. Nothing I could do except my job and I failed at that too.” Angrily pacing through the grass he ran a hand through his hair and struggled to regain composure. “All I had to do was follow protocol and bring in Tas for his sedative before the storm came in, but I chose to sit with Test instead and let Evan catch him. Evan, young nervous Evan. If I had just left Evan with Test instead none of this might have happened, and all because I was scared Test would die without me but now he is gone anyway.” Eyes blurring his breath caught as he turned back and leaned on the fence, head in hands and refusing to let her see his face.

Rising, she walked over to him, trying to think of what to say and finding the words escaping her for once. Gently she placed her hand on his arm, turning to face the mares again and letting him take his time. As his breaths steadied she turned to face him and saw he had turned back to her, his eyes pleading for something she didn’t think she could give him. “We can’t take our actions back, but you had no idea what would happen. It’s not your fault all of this has happened, you acted out of love and loyalty and I think Frankie understood that. It was a horrible accident that is all.” Reaching out she drew him into a fierce hug, this sad, battered and broken man who she had become close friends with. “Test led an amazing life, and you did everything anyone would have done. You grieve for him, but don’t ever blame yourself.” Pulling back she looked into his eyes, suddenly very sure, “not ever!”

Cavan looked down into her face, suddenly conscious of her arms still around him and before he could help himself he lowered his chin and gently pressed his lips against hers. Feeling her stiffen against him he drew back, reading the shock in her blue eyes and stepped away. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have. I’m sorry.” And with a last glance at her he turned, shrugging up his shoulders and shoving his hands in his pockets and walked away down the road.

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With that we farewell a giant. Not one by Harpg standards, nor based on fame or fans. But a giant personality and one of the foundations of KhanCohban and actually the first ever Harpg Waler.

Test was a magnificent horse, and i will miss him heaps, however his blood lives on though his two foals, and will continue to do so.

RIP Test

Registered Name: KhC The Maylle Touch
Barn Name: Test
Sex: Stallion
Age: 25 years (DECEASED)
Breed: Waler
Appearance: Black with two birdcatcher spots inside left foreleg
Genetics: EE-Aa
Height: 16.3hh
Breeder: Unknown
Owner/trainer: *sealle
Temperament: Hes a proud boy, we are still getting used to him as he is a new addition to our herd. His interactions with the other horses have been interesting, hes very nervous around them and seems to be happier left alone, he however is amazing to ride. His particular speciality is Cows and he shows a natural jump and amzing agility and stamina.
Discipline(s): Camp drafting, Jumping, RETIRED
Sire - Dam: unknown
Offspring: FWF Shockwave, Volcanic Ash

This picture shows test as I, Cavan and everyone remember him, in his prime and glorious as well as at the end when his body had failed him and he began to lose himself.

I also want to mention this is the happiest i have ever been with shading a black horse (the healthy Test ).

Oh also a big thanks to *ArwenAmidala for letting me steal, Rebecca Dawson, Reebok, Mormegil, Morwen and the foals!!!