So Long by VertigoCrime on DeviantArt (original) (raw)

For a long time, I wondered what I did wrong. Why she wouldn't spend time with me, with us. Why she wouldn't smile, laugh, and be with us. Her own sadness brought me down, I just wanted to have my mom to be my mom. But, it seems growing up without a dad, also meant growing up without a mom. We had some good times, mainly when I was really little, when whatever family we did have was actually together. Soliel also seemed to inherit our mother's depression, spending long amounts of time away from us like she did. Souci tried his best to not see the shambles of our family, and honestly... I was closest to Souci. I spent a lot of my good memories in my childhood with him. Even training with him when we became apprentices. He's the only family I feel bad about leaving behind. I'm going to miss those little girls he brought into life. However, at least one of them decided to join in on a little adventure with her aunty.

With the news of my mom leaving us, and deciding to make a brand new family else where... I knew, I just knew... She had replaced us. Not even interacting with her grandkids before just up and leaving us with some random girl. Granted, I do hope she's happy, but. If she's can be happy with us, or give us any happiness as a loving mother... then frankly, she can be cut out of my life. I've only known large amounts of depression from my mom and the pain of not being able to bring her any happiness. It constantly felt like I wasn't good enough, that just being me wasn't enough for her. Not anymore at least.

Anyway. I'm done being second best in my life. I've decided to leave Shadow Empire. I won't be going alone thankfully. As my nephew, Sebring, and his friend Kamaria, and my niece Valmue, decided to head out with me, both for their own reasons, along with Jay, a very dear and close friend of mine.

It's time I head off to create my own family, as honestly, my only family here was with Souci and his children. It's time I abandoned the pain of my parents, and just live a life of true happiness, and not feigned happiness when trying to make my mom smile.

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Fleur and art (c) VertigoCrime