Alexandra Notay on LinkedIn: #sophieparr #remember #mybabysister #grief #siblingloss #anniversary | 34 comments (original) (raw)
Alexandra Notay’s Post
Award-winning leader in housing, ESG, tech. Board chair, Independent Gov Commissioner, former plc NED, trustee, mentor, TEDX speaker. Strategist, innovator, investor, placemaker, problem-solver, purpose-driven partner.
11mo Edited
Grief is such an odd thing. It’s taken me 14 years to realise that I’ve always posted pics of my darling baby sister Sophie on her June birthday and today, the anniversary of her sudden death just before Christmas 2009 but that I’ve experienced missing her very differently between the two and of the obviously finite pictures of her these are certain ones I’m always drawn back to. I’m sure the summer / winter thing has something to do with it but also that in June I’m remembering her spark, her laugh, the adventures we had around Somerset, South America and South London, the shy little girl with the mop of ginger curls who became the tall Glamazon channelling Nicole Kidman in Moulin Rouge, her cookery innovations that sometimes ended in disaster, her utter fury at my appalling Spanish, the song and dance routines we forced our poor baby brother to join in with, her uncanny impersonations and ability to make me laugh at the most inappropriate moment possible and her unique giraffe running style… But the anniversary of her death is different because it’s so hard not to get lost in the darkness. Reliving the hours leading up to her loss. The increasingly frantic phone calls, trying to make sense of the very patient doctors giving the very bad news, the smell of the hospital waiting rooms and corridors, the late night drive across London praying that the north circular would stay clear… all of it is vivid and still raises my heart rate in panic and distress. I still seem to relive it hour by hour every year and it’s why I can’t really get going for Christmas until after the 14th December so there’s another frantic dash ahead. But the photo of my siblings and I with my darling daddy in his terrifyingly flammable Father Christmas outfit features a signature Sophie smirk and fills me with joy again. Thank you to everyone who remembers Sophie every year at whatever point and especially to those who hold us all up in the sad times. If someone you know has a difficult anniversary please don’t avoid it - it means more than you can know to get a text or call just sharing that you remember too. Those happy memories you have might have been forgotten by the bereaved and can lift them so much. Sophie is still so loved and that means such a lot - all the happy memories are a light that can drown out the sad darkness. XXX#SophieParr #remember #mybabysister #grief #siblingloss #anniversary
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