rollarcoaster (original) (raw)

Purge. Procrastination. Purge. Hatred. Fear. Purge. Procrastination.

Deleting things. Avoiding Fascism Speech.

You ever just want to throw everything away? There is also that voice telling you not to because some of it still has meaning/importance. I think I’m avoiding the speech because I’m afraid I don’t know how to summarize it and answer the questions he wants me to in it. Somehow, though, I know that I can do great on it but not at this rate…

These last few days the internet has been working like a piece of crap. If I do fix it, it lasts for about ten minutes and then it disappears again and I can’t get it back until I try again later. Quite annoying, you can’t do much in that amount of time. Speaking of which, I have re-realized that I am addicted to the internet. Stupid things, like checking my e-mail. It is mostly word of the day type things but they pile up you know? And I get many of them in one day. Maybe I should unsubscribe to them all. I also want to delete one of the two because it sucks (username, bulk mail) but I need it to filter out the spam and because my employer emails me through that one…

I found some old files…on another (operating) system on Diti’s computer but I deleted most of them and I’m going to give Kevin two of them. I found some music as well which I’m gonna transfer to this computer (just a few).

I think I’ve been having more negative thinking (self-directed) lately. It is like a mini-crisis but it will probably end after I get the speech over with and that other project which I’m not even thinking about right now. Oh crap, that reminds me I have a quiz when we come back (on that book I read). Not a terrible book at all, I’ve read worse. Which is why I’m going to return the other one to the library. I mean, I know when I flipped open to that page (mid-end) I liked the line I read but I can’t get passed the first few pages (to 100) so I’m thinking of giving it up. I hate to do it but sometimes, some books just drag on too much for my taste…its like when is this going to get interesting.

Hatred. (Self) Fear. (Everything)

SUCH a negative entry, but that is what I journal about.

The icky stuff.

PS; [Good news,] I got contacts, and a pair of glasses.

Happy New Years!