The Tale of a Small Cat (original) (raw)

Reviews & Interview	[May. 2nd, 2008\|11:19 am]Debbie
JvM review from MJ Simpson: http://www.mjsimpson.co.uk/reviews/jesusvsthemessiah.html"This is a thought-provoking film but it’s far from heavy. There’s a bit of action, plenty of tension and vein of dark humour running through the whole thing, best exemplified by probably the greatest walrus scene in the history of British cinema.""This is also a beautiful film""Technically and artistically a triumph"---------------------------------Also an interesting take on the movie from the USA: http://www.roguecinema.com/article1331.html---------------------------------And, most excitingly, an interview with Alan here: http://www.mjsimpson.co.uk/interviews/alanronald.html
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[May. 2nd, 2008|11:19 am]Debbie

JvM review from MJ Simpson: http://www.mjsimpson.co.uk/reviews/jesusvsthemessiah.html"This is a thought-provoking film but it’s far from heavy. There’s a bit of action, plenty of tension and vein of dark humour running through the whole thing, best exemplified by probably the greatest walrus scene in the history of British cinema.""This is also a beautiful film""Technically and artistically a triumph"---------------------------------Also an interesting take on the movie from the USA: http://www.roguecinema.com/article1331.html---------------------------------And, most excitingly, an interview with Alan here: http://www.mjsimpson.co.uk/interviews/alanronald.html

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(no subject)	[Dec. 27th, 2007\|11:19 pm]Debbie
[keeping me happy \|The Answer]Friday night we went to a party and I made friends with a cat and a 4 year old girl who gave me an imaginary necklace. It was pink and very pretty, and I'm still wearing it.Christmas Eve I woke up feeling wretched, having finally succumbed to one of the many viruses that everyone have been swapping. Christmas was a bit of a haze because of this, but many lovely presents were exchanged and good food consumed and suchlike. I finally opened my Lordi package from my new friend from holiday_wishes and was amazed at the quantity and variety of the contents! Including a lovely long letter with drawings and an anecdote about Lordi's mum. It is all so very cool and I'm still quite excited about it!Boxing Day meant I needed to head to the hospital to see a doctor, after waking everyone up the night before with a big scream, since I was dreaming I couldn't breathe. It was only after I screamed then apologised that wendy heard how wheezy I was and made me have my inhaler. And Al spent the night trying to calm me down because I was breathing so fast. So the doctor gave me 3 days of steroids, and I'm feeling much better physically, but totally bad mentally. I have big starey eyes and feel depressed and anxious and angry at the same time. Only one more day of them though...I can ride it out.I have such a fragile system, so easily unbalanced. How easily I'm sent mad.
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(no subject)

[Dec. 27th, 2007|11:19 pm]Debbie

[keeping me happy |The Answer]Friday night we went to a party and I made friends with a cat and a 4 year old girl who gave me an imaginary necklace. It was pink and very pretty, and I'm still wearing it.Christmas Eve I woke up feeling wretched, having finally succumbed to one of the many viruses that everyone have been swapping. Christmas was a bit of a haze because of this, but many lovely presents were exchanged and good food consumed and suchlike. I finally opened my Lordi package from my new friend from

holiday_wishes and was amazed at the quantity and variety of the contents! Including a lovely long letter with drawings and an anecdote about Lordi's mum. It is all so very cool and I'm still quite excited about it!Boxing Day meant I needed to head to the hospital to see a doctor, after waking everyone up the night before with a big scream, since I was dreaming I couldn't breathe. It was only after I screamed then apologised that wendy heard how wheezy I was and made me have my inhaler. And Al spent the night trying to calm me down because I was breathing so fast. So the doctor gave me 3 days of steroids, and I'm feeling much better physically, but totally bad mentally. I have big starey eyes and feel depressed and anxious and angry at the same time. Only one more day of them though...I can ride it out.I have such a fragile system, so easily unbalanced. How easily I'm sent mad.

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(no subject)	[Dec. 21st, 2007\|01:18 pm]Debbie
I've just been looking through my friend Charlotte's photos, and I have realised what is missing from my life. Randomness and spontaneity, and doing things just because they're fun. She is much like I used to be, and dresses up just for fun, and is odd just because it's fun to be that way, and does things to get reactions because it's interesting.I have become dull in my old age. When was the last time I dressed up just for the fun of it? I can't remember. And I have lots of silly photos, but I don't show them to anyone. Trying to set up a business and worrying about money has made me more restrained, more aware of what people think of me. You know what? I don't care. I never cared before, I was far more free-spirited, and why should I let the madness of the world become more important than my own madness? Because it is all madness, these rules and regulations and laws that some people created. The 'normal' way to dress and behave. Who is to say they know more than us? They usually don't.Alan is very into dada (if you don't know what that is, I can't explain it, read about it a little), and although I don't love ALL the weirdness that he loves the way he loves it, I love other kinds of weirdness, and I should embrace them more, even if everyone thinks I'm mad, then that's just perfect. Perhaps then I won't feel as creatively blocked either. Who knows. I wanted to do something different next year...I thought perhaps a video project or something, but perhaps this should be my project. I don't mean going out my way to be weird, just being more childlike and doing things just because I enjoy them, which I don't do much anymore, and doing things just because they're new and exciting and fun...all the things I used to do, the way I used to be, but better, because now I know what it's like NOT to be like that, I will enjoy it all the more.Anyone want to play with me?I'm really curious as to people's thoughts on this post. Positive or negative, don't know what the hell I'm talking about, think I'm silly. Give me a quick comment please?(oh, and I passed my Spanish course) :)
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(no subject)

[Dec. 21st, 2007|01:18 pm]Debbie

I've just been looking through my friend Charlotte's photos, and I have realised what is missing from my life. Randomness and spontaneity, and doing things just because they're fun. She is much like I used to be, and dresses up just for fun, and is odd just because it's fun to be that way, and does things to get reactions because it's interesting.I have become dull in my old age. When was the last time I dressed up just for the fun of it? I can't remember. And I have lots of silly photos, but I don't show them to anyone. Trying to set up a business and worrying about money has made me more restrained, more aware of what people think of me. You know what? I don't care. I never cared before, I was far more free-spirited, and why should I let the madness of the world become more important than my own madness? Because it is all madness, these rules and regulations and laws that some people created. The 'normal' way to dress and behave. Who is to say they know more than us? They usually don't.Alan is very into dada (if you don't know what that is, I can't explain it, read about it a little), and although I don't love ALL the weirdness that he loves the way he loves it, I love other kinds of weirdness, and I should embrace them more, even if everyone thinks I'm mad, then that's just perfect. Perhaps then I won't feel as creatively blocked either. Who knows. I wanted to do something different next year...I thought perhaps a video project or something, but perhaps this should be my project. I don't mean going out my way to be weird, just being more childlike and doing things just because I enjoy them, which I don't do much anymore, and doing things just because they're new and exciting and fun...all the things I used to do, the way I used to be, but better, because now I know what it's like NOT to be like that, I will enjoy it all the more.Anyone want to play with me?I'm really curious as to people's thoughts on this post. Positive or negative, don't know what the hell I'm talking about, think I'm silly. Give me a quick comment please?(oh, and I passed my Spanish course) :)

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(no subject)	[Sep. 22nd, 2007\|10:00 am]Debbie
Yaaaaaay. My spanish oral exam is over. All that studying for 5 minutes, it's so weird. My tutor said I did good, which hopefully means I didn't completely screw it up, although I did mess up a bit because we ran out of time on the first part after a bit of 'is he speaking or should I speak?' confusion and I hadn't realised we had 2 minutes and THAT'S ALL. But I'm sure these things are expected when you're using the internet and not doing it in real life.Yay, thank the gods that's over!
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(no subject)

[Sep. 22nd, 2007|10:00 am]Debbie

Yaaaaaay. My spanish oral exam is over. All that studying for 5 minutes, it's so weird. My tutor said I did good, which hopefully means I didn't completely screw it up, although I did mess up a bit because we ran out of time on the first part after a bit of 'is he speaking or should I speak?' confusion and I hadn't realised we had 2 minutes and THAT'S ALL. But I'm sure these things are expected when you're using the internet and not doing it in real life.Yay, thank the gods that's over!

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(no subject)	[Aug. 27th, 2007\|05:09 pm]Debbie
Finally have a little time to rest.The Electric Head shows went so well! They sold 28 tickets the first night, and 52 (two over capacity!) the second night. Not bad for their very first shows! People seem to either love it or don't get it at all, which can only be a good thing. I was doing lights as well as taking photos, Natalie did sound and lobsters. Pat, Pip & Dom came on friday, as well as Lydia and a friend (who seemed to think Pat was someone famous). One of Cy's friends was just in disbelief that it was Al's first ever performance. Pat said he "dug the shit out of it". Managed to make it back to Cy's friday night despite their drunken tube navigation. We lost one of Cy's friends on the way though, and when we found him again he seemed to think we'd lost him deliberately because he said he didn't like the show. Showed them the video then slept, then back into London early to meet up with Wendy, Lee & Dave for some wandering. Had a stroll around a market and saw giant mushrooms, sampled juices and olives, and discovered that apparently, "cheese never sleeps". Wandered round the South Bank, looked in gift shops, and saw a woman with an adorable soft puppy-head poking out a bag! She said it was only his second time out. I stroked him and she told him "see it's ok, everyone loves you!". So very cute. Looked at an exhibition about cities in the Tate Modern, then headed to the bar to meet up with lots of people before the show. There were 32 tickets pre-booked and we started getting worried that all our friends wouldn't get in!Al & Cy were more confident the second night, naturally, but it's weird how some things get big laughs one night but not the next, and vice versa. They were both fantastic though, and I'm very proud of them both! Needless to say, they'll be doing more shows in the near future.Went back to W's Saturday night, taking lots of the props with us. Then Sunday we went to a nearby car boot sale and got lots of super cheap things! I remember why I love car boot sales so much...I got clothes, books, a cool phone, food and a toastie-maker all for under £5. Wendy bought many books and teapots. Then Lee had to go and they said my idea of making a fake Lee and pretending he was still there was creepy, so we had tea and toast and played Once Upon a Time instead, with stories about talking cheeses.
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(no subject)

[Aug. 27th, 2007|05:09 pm]Debbie

Finally have a little time to rest.The Electric Head shows went so well! They sold 28 tickets the first night, and 52 (two over capacity!) the second night. Not bad for their very first shows! People seem to either love it or don't get it at all, which can only be a good thing. I was doing lights as well as taking photos, Natalie did sound and lobsters. Pat, Pip & Dom came on friday, as well as Lydia and a friend (who seemed to think Pat was someone famous). One of Cy's friends was just in disbelief that it was Al's first ever performance. Pat said he "dug the shit out of it". Managed to make it back to Cy's friday night despite their drunken tube navigation. We lost one of Cy's friends on the way though, and when we found him again he seemed to think we'd lost him deliberately because he said he didn't like the show. Showed them the video then slept, then back into London early to meet up with Wendy, Lee & Dave for some wandering. Had a stroll around a market and saw giant mushrooms, sampled juices and olives, and discovered that apparently, "cheese never sleeps". Wandered round the South Bank, looked in gift shops, and saw a woman with an adorable soft puppy-head poking out a bag! She said it was only his second time out. I stroked him and she told him "see it's ok, everyone loves you!". So very cute. Looked at an exhibition about cities in the Tate Modern, then headed to the bar to meet up with lots of people before the show. There were 32 tickets pre-booked and we started getting worried that all our friends wouldn't get in!Al & Cy were more confident the second night, naturally, but it's weird how some things get big laughs one night but not the next, and vice versa. They were both fantastic though, and I'm very proud of them both! Needless to say, they'll be doing more shows in the near future.Went back to W's Saturday night, taking lots of the props with us. Then Sunday we went to a nearby car boot sale and got lots of super cheap things! I remember why I love car boot sales so much...I got clothes, books, a cool phone, food and a toastie-maker all for under £5. Wendy bought many books and teapots. Then Lee had to go and they said my idea of making a fake Lee and pretending he was still there was creepy, so we had tea and toast and played Once Upon a Time instead, with stories about talking cheeses.

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(no subject)	[Aug. 17th, 2007\|12:13 am]Debbie
Oooh! I'm mentioned in an article on fangoria.com! My photos have been on pretty much every website that's reviewed KillerKiller & HellBride, but I was particularly excited to see the KillerKiller DVD (which you can get off amazon) in the 'flesh' yesterday, with my photos on the cover, back, and on the disk itself :) And Pat just texted to say that my pics are on the frontpage of fangoria.com, and the article itself actually mentions me! (although not by name. But still.)"...Warley Hospital, the location chosen to stand in for the prison, possessed both a suitably creepy atmosphere and background; until the 1920s, it was known as Warley Asylum......There were also more tangible and unsettling reminders of the former occupants, such as the phrase “I am not alone” scratched into a wall. “You see those words in the movie, but we didn’t do that; they were already there,” Higgins says. The production’s still photographer became fascinated with the architecture of the place and often wandered off to explore, and Higgins recalls that on the last day of shooting, she drew his attention to a bizarre detail in one of the walls of the hospital’s old chapel: “There were between 1 and 200 individual butterfly wings that had been torn off and inserted into the gaps between the bricks.” Despite this eerie atmosphere, the intrepid filmmakers refused to be spooked, although Higgins confides, “We spent most of the last day filming in that dark, broken-down chapel, and something just got to me and I thought, ‘I am going to be very pleased once we’ve finished filming here!’ ” "Full article at: www.fangoria.comAnd, if you haven't seen them already, my Warley Asylum photos at: www.debbieattwell.com/warley.html
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(no subject)

[Aug. 17th, 2007|12:13 am]Debbie

Oooh! I'm mentioned in an article on fangoria.com! My photos have been on pretty much every website that's reviewed KillerKiller & HellBride, but I was particularly excited to see the KillerKiller DVD (which you can get off amazon) in the 'flesh' yesterday, with my photos on the cover, back, and on the disk itself :) And Pat just texted to say that my pics are on the frontpage of fangoria.com, and the article itself actually mentions me! (although not by name. But still.)"...Warley Hospital, the location chosen to stand in for the prison, possessed both a suitably creepy atmosphere and background; until the 1920s, it was known as Warley Asylum......There were also more tangible and unsettling reminders of the former occupants, such as the phrase “I am not alone” scratched into a wall. “You see those words in the movie, but we didn’t do that; they were already there,” Higgins says. The production’s still photographer became fascinated with the architecture of the place and often wandered off to explore, and Higgins recalls that on the last day of shooting, she drew his attention to a bizarre detail in one of the walls of the hospital’s old chapel: “There were between 1 and 200 individual butterfly wings that had been torn off and inserted into the gaps between the bricks.” Despite this eerie atmosphere, the intrepid filmmakers refused to be spooked, although Higgins confides, “We spent most of the last day filming in that dark, broken-down chapel, and something just got to me and I thought, ‘I am going to be very pleased once we’ve finished filming here!’ ” "Full article at: www.fangoria.comAnd, if you haven't seen them already, my Warley Asylum photos at: www.debbieattwell.com/warley.html

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(no subject)	[Jul. 22nd, 2007\|08:52 am]Debbie
What can I write on my 'About Me' page of my photography website? I've left it blank for ages but I'm trying to get the site finished. I want it to sound fairly professional, but I can't say where I studied or all the exhibitions I've had... I don't really want to talk about my growing up or having done acting/modelling in the past...what on earth can I write?!
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(no subject)	[Jul. 17th, 2007\|12:18 pm]Debbie
Crisis over! In regard to my last post, we don't need to spend upwards of £25 on a cable now (touch wood) because Al found a how-to-fix-it-yourself online, and we had my mother cutting and soldering wires last night and it seems to be working again! Hooray! Screw you Apple! In answer to your comments - they charge that much because they can - nobody else makes the cables, so you have no choice but to spend that much. A tad evil, methinks.I have of course done many wonderous exciting things in the last few weeks, but haven't gotten around to writing any of them down. I will endeavour to when I get some time.Oh, and I just got an email that began: "... and as an afterthought, how would you like to be horribly murdered?!"Teehee. Somedays, my life makes me snicker.
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(no subject)

[Jul. 17th, 2007|12:18 pm]Debbie

Crisis over! In regard to my last post, we don't need to spend upwards of £25 on a cable now (*touch wood*) because Al found a how-to-fix-it-yourself online, and we had my mother cutting and soldering wires last night and it seems to be working again! Hooray! Screw you Apple! In answer to your comments - they charge that much because they can - nobody else makes the cables, so you have no choice but to spend that much. A tad evil, methinks.I have of course done many wonderous exciting things in the last few weeks, but haven't gotten around to writing any of them down. I will endeavour to when I get some time.Oh, and I just got an email that began: "... and as an afterthought, how would you like to be horribly murdered?!"Teehee. Somedays, my life makes me snicker.

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aerosmith / costumes / shoots	[Jun. 29th, 2007\|04:41 pm]Debbie
Good news is that from september, the Open University are giving financial awards for courses dependent on household income, which means I might be able to do another course when this one finishes :)( sunday: aerosmith Collapse ) ( wednesday: costume fitting Collapse ) ( thursday: photoshoot for film Collapse )Tomorrow we're going to Pride with Lee and co, so should be good fun.Lara phoned me up when I was still in Scotland, which I knew there must be a good reason for, because none of my friends ever phone me up (they understand I don't generally like phones). She said "I just saw your twin!", and related that she'd just seen someone who she was convinced was me in Covent Garden, and was about to shout out my name when she remembered I was still in Scotland. She said the only thing that looked different about her was that she was a bit more tanned than me, but she looked just like me and had the same style of clothes. Odd.I had to get an extension on my Spanish assignment because with everything going on, I've not had a chance to catch up in time to do it, so I'm off to study now.
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aerosmith / costumes / shoots

[Jun. 29th, 2007|04:41 pm]Debbie

Good news is that from september, the Open University are giving financial awards for courses dependent on household income, which means I might be able to do another course when this one finishes :)( sunday: aerosmith Collapse ) ( wednesday: costume fitting Collapse ) **( thursday: photoshoot for film Collapse )**Tomorrow we're going to Pride with Lee and co, so should be good fun.Lara phoned me up when I was still in Scotland, which I knew there must be a good reason for, because none of my friends ever phone me up (they understand I don't generally like phones). She said "I just saw your twin!", and related that she'd just seen someone who she was convinced was me in Covent Garden, and was about to shout out my name when she remembered I was still in Scotland. She said the only thing that looked different about her was that she was a bit more tanned than me, but she looked just like me and had the same style of clothes. Odd.I had to get an extension on my Spanish assignment because with everything going on, I've not had a chance to catch up in time to do it, so I'm off to study now.

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"If I ever met an alien, i would kill myself" - batman	[Jun. 11th, 2007\|01:53 pm]Debbie
Had a great weekend. Not a big turn-out for our second screening in Edinburgh, probably due to the fact there was a gala day with funfair going on around the corner! Rachel managed to come along though, with her boyfriend Kye, who seems really nice. It's been so long since I've seen her, I'm so glad she could make it, and that I got to meet Kye. We always used to have loads to chat about and the same happened. They invited us over sometime and I definitely want to go as soon as we can, which I think might not be for a while, as it's a bit much to try and fit in before we go, and I think we'll be down south until after The Electric Head gigs. But as I told her, it's something nice I shall look forward to, as I have missed her friendship. :)Apparently The Electric Head gigs are on the same time as The Gathering (big LARP event), which means the geekier among our friends will be busy. I hope some will still come if they aren't going to that already, as it's going to be an hour long show with a lot of work put into it. And if you find Alan funny, you'll definitely love it. We don't have any free tickets to give out, but £7.50 for an hour long show (it's not stand-up by the way, it's more like League of Gentlemen or Monty Python style sketches. Listen to the podcasts!) isn't too bad.Anyway, I was talking about Saturday. A few people came in towards the end of the film to wait for the next film on (one that HAD a budget!), and it was amusing to see them go from quiet chatting to entranced silence as they stood and watched the last 20 minutes of the film. Mairi & Bill had dinner afterwards, so we went for a wander and found the remains of the gala day, which was basically a (kinda lame) funfair, and lots of people dancing in a field with happy dogs running around. On the way home they were using the tom-tom, and Alan related my idea (that I'd forgotten ever having) about using special tom-toms for a giant game of pacman. Mairi said that if they didn't know that I didn't drink, they'd think I was a complete drunk, with all the crazy things I come up with. (And I thought I hid my crazy side from them well. Apparently not)Sunday we climbed a big hill with Biscuit, Mary & Gordon. Bic had told us he used to find loads of sheep skulls there, but there wasn't a single skull in sight. We saw some scary people made of hay bales with faces on the way, but they were gone on the way back. I took lots of photos though, and Bic brought his old cameras and took some shots too. We sat on a big rock and ate doritos and dip. It was more fun than it sounds! Then when we were all tired from walking, we went to the nearby biker pub and ate lots of food served by an odd waiter. And looked at the selection of children's books (the one with the pop-up crocodile was the best). Got home and watched Doctor Who (the 'Blink' episode, for future reference, which was excellent).Feeling much better than last week, when I was in the darkest depths of depression (almost certainly caused by hormones. The problem is, even when you KNOW you're not thinking rationally, you can't stop the nasty greyness that taints everything). Not having any money at all (or any coming in) wasn't helping, not because I want to buy things, but because it inevitably gives one a sick feeling in the pit of one's stomach, and you cannot afford to go out anywhere to take your mind off it. Alan has successfully convinced me (for the time being) not to think about it, that he shall pay for anything I need for now, so I have stopped worrying for now.Being short of ideas for anything fun to do last week, Bill dropped us at a shopping centre that has a leisure bit attached, with skiing with real snow (how is that possible?). It was all expensive as we'd anticipated - we just wanted to get out the house - but we did find a couple of cheap books to buy (I got (a new) one about animal intelligence for 10 pence, and I found 12 pence, so it was basically free.) I was reminded how fundamentally depressing I find shopping centres, however - I can feel them trying to leech my soul out of my body bit by bit. The robot arm ride was amusing to watch though, but did make me question a race that is so bored it creates a massive robot arm, just so it can sit in it and be at the mercy of its random lurching movements.I was excited and bouncy because of all the bright colours and pretty lights (even though I knew they were ultimately lying about how much fun we'd end up having), and Alan said I had the mental age of a 5 year old. Ah well.I finally beat Dracula and finished Castlevania (Circle of the Moon). I have a distinct sense of loss. You can play over with all the special cards, but it's too hard to go from having lots of powers to having none, you suddenly feel disabled. I need a new game to become addicted to!I was just reading about how the Free Hugs thing started. I love the ethos of the whole thing. More things should be free!And now to shower, and catch up with studying.
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"If I ever met an alien, i would kill myself" - batman

[Jun. 11th, 2007|01:53 pm]Debbie

Had a great weekend. Not a big turn-out for our second screening in Edinburgh, probably due to the fact there was a gala day with funfair going on around the corner! Rachel managed to come along though, with her boyfriend Kye, who seems really nice. It's been so long since I've seen her, I'm so glad she could make it, and that I got to meet Kye. We always used to have loads to chat about and the same happened. They invited us over sometime and I definitely want to go as soon as we can, which I think might not be for a while, as it's a bit much to try and fit in before we go, and I think we'll be down south until after The Electric Head gigs. But as I told her, it's something nice I shall look forward to, as I have missed her friendship. :)Apparently The Electric Head gigs are on the same time as The Gathering (big LARP event), which means the geekier among our friends will be busy. I hope some will still come if they aren't going to that already, as it's going to be an hour long show with a lot of work put into it. And if you find Alan funny, you'll definitely love it. We don't have any free tickets to give out, but £7.50 for an hour long show (it's not stand-up by the way, it's more like League of Gentlemen or Monty Python style sketches. Listen to the podcasts!) isn't too bad.Anyway, I was talking about Saturday. A few people came in towards the end of the film to wait for the next film on (one that HAD a budget!), and it was amusing to see them go from quiet chatting to entranced silence as they stood and watched the last 20 minutes of the film. Mairi & Bill had dinner afterwards, so we went for a wander and found the remains of the gala day, which was basically a (kinda lame) funfair, and lots of people dancing in a field with happy dogs running around. On the way home they were using the tom-tom, and Alan related my idea (that I'd forgotten ever having) about using special tom-toms for a giant game of pacman. Mairi said that if they didn't know that I didn't drink, they'd think I was a complete drunk, with all the crazy things I come up with. (And I thought I hid my crazy side from them well. Apparently not)Sunday we climbed a big hill with Biscuit, Mary & Gordon. Bic had told us he used to find loads of sheep skulls there, but there wasn't a single skull in sight. We saw some scary people made of hay bales with faces on the way, but they were gone on the way back. I took lots of photos though, and Bic brought his old cameras and took some shots too. We sat on a big rock and ate doritos and dip. It was more fun than it sounds! Then when we were all tired from walking, we went to the nearby biker pub and ate lots of food served by an odd waiter. And looked at the selection of children's books (the one with the pop-up crocodile was the best). Got home and watched Doctor Who (the 'Blink' episode, for future reference, which was excellent).Feeling much better than last week, when I was in the darkest depths of depression (almost certainly caused by hormones. The problem is, even when you KNOW you're not thinking rationally, you can't stop the nasty greyness that taints everything). Not having any money at all (or any coming in) wasn't helping, not because I want to buy things, but because it inevitably gives one a sick feeling in the pit of one's stomach, and you cannot afford to go out anywhere to take your mind off it. Alan has successfully convinced me (for the time being) not to think about it, that he shall pay for anything I need for now, so I have stopped worrying for now.Being short of ideas for anything fun to do last week, Bill dropped us at a shopping centre that has a leisure bit attached, with skiing with real snow (how is that possible?). It was all expensive as we'd anticipated - we just wanted to get out the house - but we did find a couple of cheap books to buy (I got (a new) one about animal intelligence for 10 pence, and I found 12 pence, so it was basically free.) I was reminded how fundamentally depressing I find shopping centres, however - I can feel them trying to leech my soul out of my body bit by bit. The robot arm ride was amusing to watch though, but did make me question a race that is so bored it creates a massive robot arm, just so it can sit in it and be at the mercy of its random lurching movements.I was excited and bouncy because of all the bright colours and pretty lights (even though I knew they were ultimately lying about how much fun we'd end up having), and Alan said I had the mental age of a 5 year old. Ah well.I finally beat Dracula and finished Castlevania (Circle of the Moon). I have a distinct sense of loss. You can play over with all the special cards, but it's too hard to go from having lots of powers to having none, you suddenly feel disabled. I need a new game to become addicted to!I was just reading about how the Free Hugs thing started. I love the ethos of the whole thing. More things should be free!And now to shower, and catch up with studying.

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