Autonomy: Chapter 5 (original) (raw)

Title: Autonomy (Chapter 5)
Rating: PG
Date written: 4 Dec., 23 Dec. 2008
Request/Suggestion: none, my own invention
Other information: Story remains cannon with the ATWT show until around July/August when I started writing. It’s set in the future, and it’s a series. Huge thanks to my excellent beta, Stephanie.
Previous Chapters: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 |

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“Do you think that burger’s big enough?” Luke asked, teasing Casey about the monstrosity of a cheeseburger residing dauntingly on his plate.

“I’m a growing boy,” Casey insisted with a smirk as he eyed the burger on steroids.

“You’re hardly a boy any more. Sorry to burst your bubble.” Luke turned his own plate around as he examined his club sandwich.

“I disagree,” Casey said, just before taking an enormous bite from said hamburger. Luke rolled his eyes.

It was quiet as they dug in, a sign of their hunger and the satisfaction they found in their meals. Grandma Emma had always said that a quiet dinner table was a testament to the quality of the spread. On occasion Luke had wanted to argue that some quiet dinner tables could be a result of Snyder disaster, but he had never mentioned it to his grandmother.

“This place never changes, does it?” Luke asked, glancing around the diner as they ate their lunch.

“Well,” Casey said around a mouthful of food, “actually it changed a lot when Henry and Vienna bought it.”

“You think so?” Luke’s eyebrows furrowed in uncertainty. He supposed it had, but he hadn’t really noticed at the time.

“Yeah, when I came back from prison, it looked completely different from how I remembered.”

Casey didn’t often talk about prison, but he didn’t have a problem referencing it either. It was an undeniable part of his past and there was no use in pretending it hadn’t happened.

“What was it really like in prison?” Luke asked. He was curious, but he had never dared gone far enough to ask Casey, uncertain about what the response would be.

“Probably something you can’t imagine.” Casey shrugged before eating a few more bites.

“Maybe I could, if you told me about it,” Luke pushed on.

“Why do you want to know?”

“Curious?” Luke said, unsure.

“Curiosity killed the cat.”

“Lucky I’m not a cat, then.” Luke grinned at Casey, hoping to persuade him to elaborate on his time locked away. Luke couldn’t explain to himself why he wanted to know, but he felt like it was a part of Casey’s life that he couldn’t imagine, and he didn’t like that.

“It was a lot of routine. Life was controlled by the clock, guards, whistles, schedules. The food was terrible; we sometimes spent hours outside with nothing to do. But they had some weight lifting equipment in the middle of the yard. A fence around it. Bars and fences everywhere. But if you had good behavior, you could be trusted with a job, like cleaning, laundry, mopping. One of my buddies even did the cleaning in the front office where visitors checked in and came through security. Everyone thought he was the luckiest.”

“And you?” Luke asked.

“I did some cleaning in one of the blocks, but then I got in a fight and they took the job away. That was right before I wrote that letter to Maddie. Right before I broke up with her.”

Casey swallowed and gazed down at his burger. Luke thought he had just mentally returned to the prison.

“What did you get in a fight about?” Luke asked.

“There were always fights,” Casey waved his hand, dismissing them. “I mean, the small skirmishes were nothing. Everyday things. But if it got out of hand, the guards got involved and then it was bad. We hated those guards.”

“So you just hung around all day, with hundreds of other men, working out and fighting and cleaning?” Luke asked. The mental pictures still seemed fuzzy to him.

“Well, sort of. They had a library. I read a few books. I made friends. And I made enemies. I wrote letters, but most of them I never sent.”

“Do you still keep in touch with any of those…friends?”

“N-no, not really,” Casey said, pausing. “They weren’t those kind of friends.”

“Oh.”

It was quiet for a moment, before Luke found another question he wanted to ask.

“Was it strange to come back to your old life?”

“Very. I’d say maybe I had some…adjustment problems.”

Casey smiled and shrugged, and Luke thought he should take it as a sign that Casey was through with that line of conversation

“Well, I still think that not much has changed about this place since your return,” Luke said, changing the subject.

“Nah, not much. But it’s Oakdale, after all. Unless you want to give people heart attacks, change has to be slow and gradual.”

Casey smirked before picking up a few fries to munch on.

“You and I aren’t usually the slow, gradual type, are we?” Luke grinned back.

They were more the jump-right-into-boiling-water-type of people, he supposed. Confrontational, facing things head-on, ripping the Band-Aid off.

“Were you gradual when you told your parents about being gay?” Casey asked curiously.

Luke tilted his head and shrugged a shoulder, transferring himself back to those high school years. Casey had been with Maddie back then. They had all been friends, but he wasn’t someone Luke had spoken to often, at least not about personal matters. They had simply been linked through Maddie.

“Not really. I guess they had lots of clues, but I was terrified to tell them.”

“You?” Casey laughed. “Mr. ‘I’m-Gay-And-The-Whole-World-Will-Know-It?’ Seducing straight boys everywhere?”

“Hey!” Luke protested, reaching across the table and shoving Casey’s arm. “I have never seduced a straight guy.”

“Right,” Casey said with disbelief clearly coloring the word.

“Kevin being the case in point.” Luke raised his eyebrow in a challenge for Casey to disagree.

“Never managed to snag that one, did you?” Casey grinned and chuckled.

Luke glared at him. “Not funny.”

“Don’t tell me you’re still sore about him?” He looked surprised and slightly mocking.

“He was my best friend!”

“Aw, that’s sweet, Luke.” Casey was barely holding in his sniggers as Luke glared at him and continued eating his lunch, attempting to ignore the ridicule.

“Lighten up. I’m sure you can wrestle some other straight boy into your bed.”

Casey laughed even harder but Luke cut him short.

“What, like all the girls you’ve gotten into yours lately?” Luke shot back, eyebrow raised in his own taunt.

“You have no proof about that!”

“Well, if you’re out with me every night, I can only guess that you’re not hitting it off with the women so well, after all,” Luke continued.

“The women happen to love me,” Casey replied airily, eating a few French fries less than gracefully.

“I can’t imagine why.” Luke rolled his eyes and Casey made a face at him, looking very much like a fifth grader.

They were still taunting each other like elementary school children as they ate, when their meal was interrupted by a shout across the diner.

“Luke Snyder!”

Both Luke and Casey’s heads snapped around toward the entrance of the diner.

“Reg!” Luke exclaimed.

He was surprised to see Reg Addington striding across the restaurant. The last Luke had heard, Reg had gone off to Detroit to work in a new company. It had been a couple years since Luke had seen him. What was more surprising was Reg’s attire. In a quick instance his eyes took in the nice, professional and polished-looking charcoal-gray suit. He had never seen Reg in a suit before, but had to admit that the sight was striking. Reg had always been very casual and relaxed in college – though usually stylish, nonetheless. The suit, however, made him look like a million bucks.

Putting the perusal aside, Luke stood from the table before Reg could make it over and the two men hugged warmly.

“What’re you doing here?” Luke asked as he stepped back, surprised but pleased.

“Well, I’m in town on a short holiday, visiting family. Nice to see you, Casey,” Reg added, closing the last few steps to the table and reaching out to shake Casey’s hand. Their shake was friendly enough, even if Casey didn’t wear the same kind of excitement on his face as Luke did.

“Look at you, stud!” Luke said examining Reg’s clothes again. “What’s with the suit?”

Luke let his eyes rove over the sleek lines and nicely fitted attire outfitting Reg’s body.

“You like it?” Reg grinned. “It’s my everyday-wear now.”

“You’re kidding!” Luke shook his head, smiling.

“Hey, I’m in business. I gotta look the part.” Reg shrugged.

Luke nodded in understanding and began moving back to his seat.

Then Reg added with a smirk, “I’m finding that it helps to impress some very hot guys as well, apparently.” His gaze lingered on Luke, who tried not to blush as he fidgeted in his chair.

He glanced at Casey and noticed that he was a little quieter than usual. Luke wasn’t sure if Casey and Reg had known each other well, so he took it as his responsibility to try to make them all comfortable.

“It’s just me and Casey, so pull up a chair, man,” Luke instructed Reg, who agreed and grabbed a chair from a nearby empty table. He positioned it on the end, between Luke and Casey, and sat down.

Luke smiled and looked briefly across the table at Casey, who had his hands in his pockets now, his empty plate pushed away.

“I can’t believe you’re back,” Luke said to Reg.

“Well, it’s not for too long. I’m usually tied up with family the whole time, so it’s lucky I ran into you guys.” Reg made a point to direct his words to both Luke and Casey.

“Yeah, it’s great.” Casey smiled.

Luke turned his attention to Reg.

“So, what’s it like in Detroit? How’s it going? What’s life like? Do you love it or hate it?” Luke asked, leaning forward in anticipation of hearing all the details.

Reg explained about his business, the kind of work he did, and that it was progressing well at the moment. Their company had a rough start up, but now it was booming and he was busier than ever. The income was worth it though, and it allowed him the opportunity to take holidays and visit family or do some light traveling. Luke thought it sounded pretty nice, though it also made him feel slightly intimidated. He was still a student, and he felt like it somehow made him less of an adult, compared to Reg.

“What’s going on here in Oakdale? What are you guys up to these days?” Reg asked, glancing at both Luke and Casey.

“I’m working on my grad studies,” Luke said, wishing he had something more accomplished he could say.

“And you’re working out at the farm with your dad,” Casey added.

“Well, it’s not a real job. It’s a family thing. Casey, though,” Luke said, turning to Reg, “he’s holding down two jobs. He’s still at Emily Stewart’s old company, but he’s got the chief assistant position. And he makes a mean caramel machiatto at Java.” Luke grinned at Casey before turning back to Reg.

Reg glanced between the two of them and his nose flared as he smiled in amusement. “Aw, that’s cute. With the way you two talk, if I didn’t know better, I’d think you were together.” The smile became a smirk and he eyed Luke, waiting for a response.

“Been there, done that.” Luke laughed.

“What?” Casey asked, looking at Luke in surprise.

“Well, you were a great fake boyfriend,” Luke conceded, reaching over and patting Casey’s hand genially.

Casey responded with a half smile and looked away. Something about it bothered Luke.

“You guys are something else. I’m guessing this fake boyfriend bit has something to do with the situation that happened freshman year with Noah, and I’m also guessing it’s something you still can’t tell me about,” Reg said, glancing between them but letting his gaze settle on Luke.

“Well, I could tell you, but it’s a long story, and it’s old news now.” Luke shrugged.

“We could get together later when I have more time. I don’t mind a long story from you.” Reg smiled and winked.

Luke felt his face warm. Reg had always been unabashed in his flirtation.

“Sure, maybe lunch –”

“Dinner. A date?” Reg interrupted with a sly smile and that concentrated look that made Luke nervous. How Reg was so good at it, Luke couldn’t understand.

“I gotta go,” Casey said suddenly, standing up and causing his chair to scrape back loudly along the floor.

“What?” Luke asked, looking up at him.

“Sorry, just remembered something… Um, see you guys later,” Casey blurted out quickly. He stood for a few awkward and lingering seconds, glancing at both Luke and Reg and then he just disappeared, much like one of the barn cats Luke used to watch tear out of the barn when the dogs came around.

Luke blinked curiously at the vacated chair across the table.

“What's up with him?” Reg asked, staring in shock at Luke.

“I don't know,” Luke said slowly. “He just does that sometimes. I get the feeling that he has, like, twelve different things on his mind and I couldn't even guess half of them. Then he just takes off out of the blue with some idea or something he has to do. I don't know.”

Luke shook his head, letting the confusion settle before he and Reg managed to restore their conversation. Reg had many questions about Oakdale, old friends, and current news. It was easy to talk to him, but Luke recalled that it had always been easy to talk to Reg, though his open flirtation used to intimidate Luke in the past. He had never known how to respond to his advances without awkward embarrassment. Still, Reg was very nice and Luke enjoyed the attention from him.

In the end, Luke paid the bill from the lunch and he and Reg agreed to meet later to finish catching up. They both had plans for the day but chose another date before Reg’s flight back to Detroit.

As he left the diner, Luke wondered vaguely where Casey had disappeared to, but figured he would call his friend later to check up on him.

..:..

Luke found himself lost in thought more often than he preferred, these days. He began to wonder if it was a part of getting older. Maybe it was natural to spend more time in contemplation as the years went by. He had always been a thinker though, and in those moments when he hadn’t paused before acting, he most often had found himself in a world of trouble. Thinking wasn’t a bad thing.

Luke closed his car door and bounced his keys in his hand, striding across the front lawn of the farmhouse. There was only one other car at the farm – a car that didn’t normally belong there. He couldn’t imagine what had brought one of his sisters out to the farm in the middle of the day, but he didn’t have to ponder it for long.

Luke pushed the screen door open to the farm’s front porch and immediately two teenagers sprang apart on the old wicker sofa.

Luke laughed out loud.

“He-ey Luke,” Natalie said, her voice nervous as she swiped a hand across her mouth.

It was an absurd gesture, as it wouldn’t erase the image Luke now had locked in his mind of his baby sister making out with her boyfriend.

Despite the evidence of her nervousness, however, Natalie was grinning like a child who had just been caught doing something mischievous. She stood from the sofa as Luke returned her greeting and she introduced her boyfriend, Chris.

Luke eyed the boy, sizing him up as the first impression sank in. He had heard a lot about Chris in the last couple of months, and had even seen him at the house a few times in passing glances, but this was the first time for Luke to actually meet him properly.

“I wanted to show Chris the farm, but I had no idea it would be locked!” Natalie said, sounding surprised.

“Yeah, who ever thought it possible for the farm to be empty,” Luke agreed, digging his keys out of his pocket.

“So I took him on a walk around the farm and showed him the horses and pond and stuff,” Natalie continued.

“And then you just thought you’d sit around on the front porch until someone came home?” Luke asked, raising a skeptical eyebrow at his sister, and then adjusting his gaze to the boyfriend.

“Well, we weren’t exactly just sitting around,” Natalie said, catching Luke’s eye. Her cheeks were tinged with warmth despite her unabashed disposition.

“So I noticed. You better be glad it was me and not Grandma who caught you,” Luke warned.

“Oh, come on, what would Grandma do?” Natalie asked.

“I wouldn’t advise you to find out,” Luke warned. “Same goes for you, too,” he added pointedly to Chris, who seemed to be letting Natalie carry the conversation for him.

“Y-yeah, sorry. We were just…just – ”

“I know what you were ‘just,’” Luke replied, cutting him off as he got the farm door open and led them into the kitchen of the farmhouse.

“Relax, Luke. It’s not like me and Faith never caught you and Noah doing the same thing,” Natalie said, shrugging as she led Chris to one side of the island in the kitchen. Luke moved to the fridge to grab a soda and turned to face them.

“You never caught us doing that,” Luke argued.

“Yeah, right! I was still a kid when we came down stairs and you and Noah-”

“Were hugging. I have a memory too, Nat,” Luke cut her off.

“Fine, fine. You win this one,” Natalie gave in, then reached across the counter and stole Luke’s soda. Luke scowled, turned to the fridge, pulled out two more sodas and passed one to Chris.

“S-so, you’re the gay one?” Chris asked Luke.

A silent second passed through the kitchen before Luke let out a guffaw, glad that he hadn’t had soda in his mouth to spit out.

“The gay one in Oakdale?” Luke asked, barely getting it out between laughs. He was sure Chris hadn’t meant it that way, but that was how Luke had immediately registered it. “There are other gay guys in Oakdale,” he continued, still laughing as he watched Chris blush, apparently flustered at not making a very good impression on Natalie’s brother.

“N-no, I meant, the gay brother.” Chris frowned and looked away in shame.

“Well, the jury’s still out on Ethan, but between Aaron and I, yes, I’m the gay one,” Luke replied.

Natalie caught his eye and smiled, shaking her head.

“Do you have a boyfriend?” Chris asked, recovering from his embarrassment enough to take a drink of soda and actually meet Luke’s eyes.

“Not at the moment, no.”

“Luke’s playing the field,” Natalie added, laughing.

“Har, har,” Luke exaggerated, rolling his eyes at his sister.

“So I thought sometime I could take Chris out on the horses,” Natalie changed the subject.

The three of them talked for some time about the horses, whether Chris had any experience with animals, and even debated over the best horseback riding teacher in the family. Luke was pleased that his sister considered him up to par with their father in that regard. As they talked, Chris became noticeably more comfortable and spoke much more freely. Luke tried to imagine what it would be like, meeting a girl’s family – her father, and older brothers. He wondered if he had it easier with his lot, as far as that was concerned.

He always wanted to impress his boyfriend’s parents, of course, but he didn’t think dads and brothers were quite as scary, comparatively. At least, normal, sane ones weren’t.

“You know, y-you’re not half as scary as your dad is,” Chris said to Luke.

“That’s what you say now,” Luke said in a light tease of a warning.

“Stop that!” Natalie cried, shoving Luke’s arm. “He’s nothing, after Dad,” Natalie added to Chris.

“Is that so?” Luke raised an eyebrow. Natalie was making pleading eyes at him while Chris was looking away.

“I remember how scary Dad can be,” Luke continued, hoping to ease whatever impression Chris had been left with from Holden.

“Did he ever scare off any of your boyfriends?” Natalie asked with interest. Luke watched as she reached over to Chris and very nonchalantly slid her hand into his, intertwining their fingers over the top of the island counter.

“Isn’t it different? I mean, because you’re a guy and…your boyfriend is a guy?” Chris asked, his eyebrows knitted in confusion.

“Not really. Dad’s equally protective of all of us, I’d say,” Luke replied. “I’m pretty sure he tried really hard to scare off my first crush.”

“What? Really? What did he do?” Natalie asked eagerly.

“Do you remember Kevin?” Luke asked. She shook her head.

“He was my best friend in high school. I kinda had a crush on him, and I think Dad figured it out, or thought there was something going on. It was before I came out to him and mom, actually.”

“What happened?” Natalie asked.

“I think Dad must have warned Kevin to stay away, and I think he even yelled at him, I don’t know. But Kevin got spooked and took it seriously. He was terrified to be seen with me, in case Dad found out, I guess.”

“You’re kidding! I can’t imagine Dad shouting at anyone! Well, I mean, apart from us when we do something stupid,” Natalie replied.

Luke and Natalie exchanged knowing smiles, having experienced enough scoldings from their father to not want to wish it on anyone else. Chris looked uncertain, as though he were fighting off discomfort again.

They remained in the kitchen, drinking their sodas and changing the subject of conversation to something more neutral until Natalie announced that she needed the restroom and disappeared up the stairs.

“Sorry about earlier,” Chris said.

Luke glanced at him, and even though Chris hadn’t spelled out exactly what he was sorry for, Luke figured he was referring to the make-out session he had caught on the front porch. It probably wasn’t the best way to make a first impression.

“Don’t worry about it. Just be sensible.”

Chris didn’t reply and they stood in silence with their colas.

“Be careful with her, too,” Luke added.

Chris looked up.

“She may seem tough, but don’t even think about hurting her,” Luke warned.

Chris swallowed and stood up a little straighter. “I won’t.”

“Just see that you don’t. You’ll have to answer to me, if you do,” Luke said with a deliberate ferocity of protection that he had probably picked up from his dad.

Chris let out a huff of skepticism, smirking. “And what’re you going to do?”

Luke’s demeanor hardened.

“I mean, you’re a…you’re…”

“I’m what?” Luke demanded, stepping around the island and towering over Chris, who was an inch or two shorter than Luke.

“You’re….” Chris swallowed again, his eyes averting from Luke’s.

“Yes?” Luke demanded, not wavering one bit as he stood in Chris’s space, exerting all the intimidating power over him that he could.

“Just, um… N-nothing. You’re right.”

“You’re right I’m right. Don’t hurt her,” Luke warned, narrowing his eyes at Chris who only spared a second’s glance before looking away again.

The door to the stairs clicked open and Luke stepped away, grabbing his coke and sitting down at the table.

“What’s going on?’ Natalie asked curiously.

“Nothing,” Chris replied, but a quiver still hung in his voice.

“Were you threatening my boyfriend?” Natalie asked, accusing Luke.

“Just making sure he knows where I stand about my little sister.”

“Oh my gosh! I can’t even leave the room for a minute without one of my family members making threats!” Natalie accused.

Luke smiled at her, and Natalie made a face at him, clearly not pleased but willing to forgive him.

“Anyway, it’s time for a tour of the farm house before we head out. We’re going to dinner and a movie tonight!” Natalie said, changing the subject again.

Luke asked what movie they were planning to see, and Chris loosened up as they discussed the movie, its potential merits, and the actors’ previous performances. For the most part, Luke thought Chris was all right, but he still made a note to keep an eye on the kid. He tried to cut him some slack for the comments he hadn’t quite had the gall to speak, but only because he was convinced that Chris didn’t know any gay people and wasn’t entirely educated on the matter.

Natalie and Chris took their tour alone, but Luke tracked their progress by listening for footsteps. They didn’t make any inappropriately long stops upstairs, and before long they were saying goodbye and leaving in Natalie’s car.

Luke grinned, pleased with himself for scaring his little sister’s boyfriend. It was one of those things he had always dreamed of doing – one of the perks of being an older brother.

His phone beeped then, pulling Luke out of his thoughts and he dug it out of his pocket to see who it was. A new text had arrived, and Luke hoped it was Casey explaining where he had disappeared to earlier, or else telling him about some crazy scheme he had undoubtedly come up with to entertain them that evening.

Instead, the message was from Reg.

Next: Chapter 6