geminigirl, posts by tag: sex - LiveJournal (original) (raw)

geminigirl, posts by tag: sex - LiveJournal By the time you read this the world will have changed

		Playboy We had a bunch of people over last night for Rosh Hashanah. One of my friends has a 12 year old son, who accompanied her for dinner. Cayne and I are fond of him, and he often hangs out with us when we go out.At one point during dinner the conversation strayed in a direction that led to the 12 year old reciting some poems by Shel Silverstein. I mentioned that he'd been a contributor to Playboy. Mom reacted with surprise. Child looked at us and said "What's Playboy?"The conversation paused for a moment, and Mom asked Cayne if he had one around. When he said no, she suggested that the men at the table try to explain what it is. (I think there's a Penthouse letters and a Hustler or two in the house, but those aren't quite on the same level as Playboy.) So Cayne and our friend Scott are trying to explain what it is, and I looked at the kid and said "It's a magazine with pictures of naked women in it." Now I realize that's not all that's in Playboy, but that's pretty much what people think of when they think of it. Poor kid looked really weirded out. He asked why people would want that and what was the point? He looked kind of terrified. We tried to explain what the rest of the magazine included-the articles and lifestyle stuff. We tried to explain what the phrase "bachelor pad" meant. The child was adamant that he'd never have Playboy in the house. I leaned over to Mom and suggested that the child's older brother (who is 21) should purchase one for him. It was just adorable. The 12 year old is an incredibly bright child who is much slower in the social development than academic. Scott joked about getting him a subscription for Christmas. He said "If you did, I'd burn them." Mom said "No you wouldn't. You would hide them under your mattress-that's what your father did, and what [brother] did." In a few years, he'll look back on that night and think about what he missed. For now, the adults who were there will get a smile out of it.Tags: holiday, sex, silly

		Stuff and Things. Note: Naked woman on the cover a magazine at the first link.Beth Ditto on the cover of NME (I think it's the current issue of NME, but I haven't gotten NME regularly in a while.) It's getting a mixed response, with some people horrified that there's a naked fat woman with hairy armpits on the cover a magazine, and others talking about how empowering it is to see her there. And there's a variety of responses to what she said about gay men and celebrities being to blame for the body image/self hatred issues as well. Also, interesting blog post on feminist messages and abstinence only education. Or rather, the anti-feminist/anti-empowered woman messages that exist in such programs.And, in contrast, and for your amusement...abstinence only sites courtesy of Whitehouse.org 1Sex is for Fags-an abstinence only site for boys.Iron Hymen an abstienence only site for girls. 1. Whitehouse.org is a humor site/spoof site, not a real site.Tags: feminism, sex, silly

		New History Form at the Doctor's Office My doctor's office had a new patient history form today. One of the questions on the form was asking how many sexual partners you had in the last year. This was not a difficult question for me to answer. Another asked for the total number of lifetime sexual partners. I couldn't answer this question...I have no idea; I've never really counted. I'm wondering if that's a typical thing or am I just odd. And so, as usual, when I have a question, a poll. Poll #965547 Numbers Matter Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All. Participants: 71 Do you know the total number of sexual partners you've had in your lifetime? View Answers Yes 45(63.4%) No 26(36.6%) Tags: polls, sex

		Read it? This morning, we went for Cayne's second semen analysis. I know some people have asked about it, and Cayne has consented to my writing about it. It was, admittedly, both humiliating and amusing all at once. So, since a great deal of stuff in my life seems to end up on LJ, and since some people have been asking about it, I offer a poll. Poll #930861 Read it? Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All. Participants: 61 Do you want to read the factual account of the semen analysis experience View Answers Yes 55(100.0%) Do you want to read the pornified version of the semen analsys that pinkfish encouraged me to write? View Answers Yes 48(100.0%) Tags: fertility, polls, sex

		Our Visit to the Porn Store The background: PCOS is a fertility issue in many ways, and so, in order to determine the best course of treatment, and how much intervention, we're going through a lot of the usual fertility screening stuff. This is a bit awkward and invasive, but it's what we need to do. This meant that zedrikcayne had to go for a semen analysis, and upon recieving the results, had a visit with the urologist who ordered a second semen analysis and some other tests. The urologist (who told us that he and his wife have gone through their own fertility issues) explained that many times, men who go for semen analysis are so uncomfortable with the whole situation, and find it sterile and distressing, and so the first sample is not always an accurate measure of things. And he also suggested that zedrikcayne "bring some pornograhpy" because that often helps encourage a proper count. So, last night, I tried to figure out how to find an adult store, without getting a screen full of porn, since that's not what I was looking for, and toay we paid a visit to our local porn store. ( not particularly explicit, but sexually oriented discussion follows this cut tag.Collapse )A question: Can anyone explain to me, why is it, that porn that includes women having sex with women,as well has men having sex with women, doesn't get classified as bisexual, but as soon as it involves action between two men, it automatically becomes "bisexual"? It doesn't make sense. I understand the idea of marketing, and that the largest consumers of porn are men who don't want to see men having sex with men, but it just seems silly.I've got a post brewing about sex, and marriage, and polyamory and kinky stuff. It's not likely to be explicit content, but just chatter and processing and that sort of thing. I've got some filters that this post may appropriately overlap to, but if you think you might like to read it, let me know. I could certainly use the feedback and space to discuss it, but it's not something that I think belongs as public.Tags: everyday life, fertility, florida, pcos, sex

		barking_iguana sent me the above video. I don't know if I ever told him the following story, or he just thought I would be amused by the video, but here's my story about turtle sex.I spent some time working for a program called Youth Enrichment Services. They were a partly-town funded youth program that provided after school, weekend and summer programs for teenagers, and summer programs for elementary kids as well. Part of my job involved running the Summer Day program which was an partly educational, partly day care type program for the five to twelve year olds. Each week we had a theme that we based our education and arts and crafts programs on, and often, our field trips as well. One week, our theme was "reptiles" which included a trip to the Reptile Museum. We went through part of the museum, and in the middle there was a pen, with large tortoises of several varieties. They sat the kids down around the edge, and periodially, there was a docent who would come and talk about various animals and the kids could touch them and see them and hold snakes and things. So my kids (about 30 5-12 year olds, plus my staff, 2 CITs who were thirteen, and six fifteen and sixteen year old counselors) are trying to get the kids settled, when one tortoise mounts another. I hear snickering and giggling. I turn around and see what the tortoises are doing. And I cringe. I'm not the one who needs to be explaining what the animals are doing to someone else's five year old, nor should any of my staff-this is one of those things where you don't want to step on someone else's parenting-toes.. I grab my counselors and through my own snickers and giggles, tell them to please keep it under control, if they need to step away, that it's fine. I find a co-worker who is helping to chaperone the trip, and we have a good giggle over it. Then, the docent begins her presentation. And one of my older kids (I think he was eleven) raises his hand and immediately asks "Is that turtle going to get pregnant?" The docent handled it marvelously and said "no, they're different kinds of turtles." So, I've seen up close tortoise sex. And it's not pretty.Tags: sex, silly

		Truthfully... Part of a response I wrote elsewhere this morning..."It pains me that you (or any person) feels the need to fake interest in sex, or fake orgasms. I think it can be really harmful to a relationship-dishonesty in other areas of a relationship is, for most people, unacceptable...why do so many people feel it's okay in the bedroom?" I know there were times when I was younger, and didn't have the self-awareness or self-confidence to speak up as much when I faked interest. But at some point, I realized or I learned that it caused more harm than good, that having sex when I didn't feel like it, or having sex and faking it to get it over with was wrong for me, and my partner. I'm glad I came to that place, but I wonder about people who choose to fake it. In most cases...what's the benefit?Tags: questions, sex

		It's sometimes hard being an AIDS activist, but along the way one learns to both celebrate and mourn (The title is a quote from ruralrob-more on that in the second paragraph of my post...)First of all, I'm mystified that there's nothing I can find going on in or around Orlando to honor today. I was on the phone with someone at the GLB community center (They've left out the T part, not me...) last night who couldn't find anything, and seemed vaguely surprised about it as well. I'll give them a call later today and ask "what's up?"-looks like this little activist has found some things to do. Second, I think people need to go read ruralrob's post "Shame, Philadelphia, Redemption" honoring World AIDS Day. Rob is a fantastic person to begin with, eloquent, creative, and a wonderful story teller, and a fantastic photographer. I think he expressed a sentiment in his post that I didn't come close to in mine....It's sometimes hard being an AIDS activist, but along the way one learns to both celebrate and mourn well. On December 1, World AIDS Day, I hope you understand why we do both."I read Rob's post and feel completely inadequate.I wrote elsewhere about women and HIV for today, so you may have seen this part posted elsewhere, though I've editorialized a bit more on the bottom in my own journal...Here's what I wrote:For World AIDS Day 2005…In 2005, twenty-five years into the AIDS Pandemic women are still very much affected by HIV and AIDS. Globally, half of the people infected with HIV are women, but women are disproportionately affected with care-giving responsibilities for family members, whether or not they’re infected. ( Some of the major issues relating to women and HIV…Collapse )What can you do? Know your own HIV status. If you’re engaging in any kind of risky behavior, get tested regularly, and consider ways to reduce your risk. Take responsibility for your own sexual health-get regular check ups, encourage friends and partners to do the same. Make good decisions about using contraception, about reducing your risk of unwanted consequences of sexual behavior and about what you want. Learn to say no and mean it. Make clear, well thought out decisions about what you want, how far you’re willing to go and what risks you’re willing to take. And most importantly, communicate your boundaries clearly to your partner, before you get too hot to do that. The number one advocate for your sexual health is you.Know what resources are available in your community for HIV information-prevention, treatment, testing, and support them in whatever ways you can. Supporting those organizations can mean giving time or money, or it can mean making sure to point people who need their resources at the places that provide them.Support initiatives, projects and programs that try to provide accurate, honest information and services about sexuality and sexual health. Love yourself. Recognizing your own value as a person does a great deal in helping people make healthy choices and reduce risky behavior.Remember that HIV and AIDS aren’t a one day thing…they’re an everyday thing. Despite advances in treatment, HIV still has no cure. It takes the efforts of all of us to stay safe and healthy, to prevent the spread of HIV further, to support the efforts to find cures, to ensure access to treatment and services for everyone who needs it. Find out more about HIV and educate yourself. Check out some of these websites for more information:Know HIV HIV InSite The Body United Nations AIDS Information The American Medical Student Association Global AIDS Pandemic TimelineI think the most important message in this is self-worth...it really does make a difference in the kinds of choices many people make. I also know that today makes me feel helpless an inadequate. I feel like there's so much more work for me to do, and that I'll never do enough. Still, I hope I can figure out how to do my part...Tags: hiv, politics, sex

		As I was cutting up some chicken to go in a stir fry for Cayne's lunch, I had Oprah on the TV. She's interviewing author Terry McMillian (of the semi-autobiographical How Stella Got her Groove Back and Waiting to Exhale and others) and her ex-husband, Johnathan Plummer, who revealed to Terry that he was gay. During the early part of the program, Oprah was discussing with Terry McMillan how Johnathan revealed his sexual orientation to Oprah, and how, at the time he revealed to her that he is gay he also said that he'd never been intimate with a man. Terry McMillian responded with, "That's like saying you're an alcoholic without ever having had a drink."It's a frequent refrain, "How can you know you're lesbian/gay/bisexual if you've never had sex with a MOTAS1? So, how did you know about your own sexuality...gay, lesbian, bisexual, straight, whatever label you choose to apply? Before or after you started having sex? Did you ever question it? How do you feel about what Terry McMillian said to Johnathan-do you think people can know before they try it? (Anon posting on, IP logging off, so go ahead an answer anonymously if you like-also, feel free to link to this post and encourage other people to answer, and mactavish I can re-post it Friday to bisexual as a QOTW if you like.)1. Member Of The Appropriate Sex Tags: queer, questions, sex




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			"Be courteous to all, but intimate with few, and let those few be well tried before you give them your confidence. True friendship is a plant of slow grow, and must undergo and withstand the shocks of adversity before it is entitled to the appellation." -George Washington ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~"If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away." -Henry David Thoreau, Walden ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~"How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself." - Anais Nin ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~"If sex and creativity are often seen by dictators as subversive activities, it’s because they lead to the knowledge that you own your own body (and with it your own voice), and that’s the most revolutionary insight of all."-Erica Jong~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~"There’s only one thing that I know how to do wellAnd I’ve often been told that you only can doWhat you know how to do wellAnd that’s be you,Be what you’re like,Be like yourself..."-They Might Be Giants~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~"We are Buck's Rock. We have, each of us, contributed to it, and once we give a part of ourselves to something we believe in, it becomes a part of us."-Ernst Bulova~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~"A lot of people, when they talk about gay culture they have this idea that we all live in this sort of a big pink house, and that we share the same political and social and sexual views which is clearly not the case. I've sat at dinner tables with right wing homosexuals, and to me that's like being a vegeterian butcher."-Boy George





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